It is a natural thing that our identity should change throughout our lives based on occupation or marriage or family ties. I started out being Bens little boy. You know,that's Bens little boy. Went from that to being Ben's boy sans the little. Growing up in a small town most people knew you or someone in your family. Maybe not your parents but an Aunt or Uncle. Why, that is the Reichart boy, his mother was a Bennett. Her identity had changed too.
Leaving home and joining the Navy,and I expect it is the same in all branches,I became just Reichart. If your name was being read off a list it was always Reichart,Austin B. Last name first,name and initial. Your peers called you by your last name. A few very close friends may call you by your first name but that was the exception. For twenty years I was mostly a rank and a name. Petty Officer Reichart. We moved around a lot of course and the neighbors we did have called you by your name but always added,he is in the Navy. So that was your identity. Navy man.
After retiring I settled in Maryland. I am known here as Ben but also as being from away. I'm not a native to this land. Been here for over twenty years now but will never be from here. I can talk of places and events but not to local traditions. I have no ancestral claim to any of the good fishing holes or ties to the land. I'm a foreigner.
Yesterday while I was at work in the grocery store a Mom and three little girls were shopping. The little girls walked by me laughing and smiling. A minute later they came by again and were staring at me a little so I said Hello and asked if they needed to buy candy. Laughing they said,no,we went trick or treating last night ! I joked with them and off they went. Just as they were entering the checkout line the Mom says to me," You're Mark and Morgans grandfather,aren't you ?" I said yes that I was. The little girls said they thought it was me and had seen me at the school on Grandparents day.
I have been a grandfather for 9 years and am happy to say it is becoming my new identity ! Its' an identity I think I like the best other than being a good husband and the later is up for debate !
It's my favorite new identity too, and I have many! Like you said, in a small town you're known so many ways, as in "she was so-and-so's daughter" or "she's so-and-so's sister" or "so-and-so's wife" or "she goes to the whatever church" or "she's in the paper all the time" or "she came and helped me when I needed the ambulance"....I've heard so many times "that name is very familiar - where do I know you from?" I love going to school-the same school where I went myself so many years ago-and being "Micah's grandma"!
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