Perception

 Current events are often what inspire these morning compositions. I usually write them first thing before my day begins. My thoughts are a bit clearer not having been tainted by the day. This morning I hesitated a bit before attempting to share my thoughts on the whole George Floyd incident. I have made a few comments here and there on Facebook, always a risky business but nonetheless I find it difficult to bridle myself. This morning as I checked my Facebook page I was greeted by a quote from Truman left in the comment section of one of my postings. " When even one American, who has done nothing wrong, is forced by fear to shut his mind and close his mouth, then all Americans are in peril. " ( Harry S Truman ) It gave me pause to think. A little further down the page another friend, from days long past, questioned why prejudice still exists, why we haven't learned from history, why the black man is a target for abuse. My response was a question, " is it a cultural thing" Perceptions are often stronger than reality. Is it the way blacks, and other minorities are perceived by whites? I think that may be a good deal of it but does the black man bear any responsibility in that? Is that the cultural thing?
 We all know there are no absolutes in this world. Not every black man is alike nor every white man. Stereotyping , profiling, or whatever name you wish to call isn't reality. Still it is a perception that individuals form and that is stronger than reality. Call it belief if you want, call it whatever suits you, it is still a perception. Prejudice is rooted in perception! That's the reason children, little children have none. As they grow prejudice will take root according to the actions of others, the perception becoming that all people will react in that fashion based on the color of their skin, their income status, their political affiliation, physical attributes or lack of them, whatever the case nay be, prejudice ( pre-judging ) is based in our own perception of the world. The question is, to me, are there cultural differences that have never changed over time? That is to say, is what we label prejudice really just a clash of culture?
 I was thinking of the promise made by General Sherman following the civil war. He issued field order #15 which would grant, no more than forty acres, to the freed slaves. This land would stretch from Charleston to the St. Johns river in Florida and extend thirty miles inland. That came about when Sherman and Secretary of War Edwin Stanton met with 20 black leaders. It was asked of them, what do wish for your people? The answer was , land. Land were they could live, grow crops, build their own businesses. This was first proposed by then radical Republicans as a means to redistribute the land held by plantation owners, a sort of reparation for slavery. It would have happened to, except for John Wilkes Booth and his band of southern sympathizers. By killing Lincoln that made Andrew Johnson the president. Being a southern sympathizer ( yes he was a Democrat, not a political statement, just a statement of fact ) he rescinded that order and returned the land back to the original landowners, the very people that had rebelled against the government in the first place! But that is all history. These black leaders were also asked where they would prefer to live, scattered among the white people throughout the nation or in a designated area. The answer was clear and concise, " I would prefer to live by ourselves, for there is prejudice against us in the south, that will take years to get over. " Yes, I'd say there is! You can't but wonder what if, what if they had been given this land, their stated intent was to live there, farm there, gain wealth enough to purchase the land for their own! Isn't that the dream that is America after all. The opportunity to own our own land, to live free, working your own land? Yes it was, and to some extent that is still the ultimate goal. The promise was that the blacks would govern themselves, no white man would be allowed to settle in that area, only white troops or others necessary for the protection of the people until they could fully protect themselves. Was the idea, separate but equal? One could see it that way. You can't help but think perhaps that was a necessity at that time. We can't know the outcome had things gone the way William Sherman and  President Lincoln envisioned. Would we still be having this conversation about prejudice?
 Personally I have my doubts as it is my belief you can't legislate feelings. Had that land been redistributed, the plantation owners land seized, would that have eradicated the "old south. " No, it wouldn't have because the people themselves are that old south. Resentment, bitterness and hatred would still exist. Prejudice is born of perception. Was George Floyd a victim of a racist white police officer? Or was Mr, Floyd just a victim, for there is no doubt that police officer had no regard whatsoever for the health, safety or well being of the man. Would the reaction had been different if Mr. Floyd was white? We can't know the answer to those questions. When we are able to ask that question, then discussion may begin. And that is what Truman was talking about.
 In closing I do want to make it perfectly clear. That ex-cop, and in my opinion the other police that were on the scene, must face justice. Whatever his motivation was, he is responsible for the death of Mr. Floyd. He is guilty and as far as I'm concerned the only thing left to decide is punishment. Those that were with him are complicit as well and should face justice! Those officers need to answer for their lack of inaction! Why didn't they intervene? That being said I will add, there is no excuse that will satisfy me in that regard. No excuse at all! If you want to eradicate prejudice, you would have to eradicate perception. Sadly, you can't really do that. Wish I had an answer though, I really do. 

Seasoning

 Making the morning coffee falls to whoever gets up first. It's usually my wife. Still it's not unheard of that I do it. The pot is usually empty, washed out, and ready to go. We use a percolator because I believe perked coffee is the best. Now it's something the wife does religiously, wash out the pot. I mean wash it out with soap and water. Yes, she does her best to remove the seasoning. In contrast I will simply rinse it out. Hey it gets disinfected with that boiling hot coffee so there is no worries as far as I'm concerned. She does the same thing to my coffee mug. I have been using the same mug for a number of years now, the grandkids gave it to me and it declares that they love me! I love them too. I also love my coffee mug to be seasoned, so it's a constant struggle. I have my coffee mug that I used on my last ship. It doesn't hold quite as much due to buildup up seasoning. Any Navy man would understand exactly what I'm talking about. You never, ever, wash a man's mug out with soap and water! Rinse at best and most of the time not even that. The coffee will kill any known germ, virus or bacteria! Probably why I don't have covid 19! Even that can't stand up to a well seasoned coffee mug. And that brings me to my next thought. Are we cleaning ourselves to death?
 We've all heard that before, jokingly. Well every joke is funny because it holds a bit of truth. We can relate to that. I do believe that we are creating unnecessary problems for ourselves in that regard. You can't build up an immunity to something you are never exposed to. You don't have to be an immunologist to understand that. The world is a dirty place, better get used to it. Really it's not much different than adjusting to whatever climate you are in. What's too hot and what's too cold? All depends upon who you ask. I think we have to season our bodies as well as our coffee mugs. In that way we are protected. I agree it was a great thing to discover those germs and to prevent putting then into our bodies. I'm thinking of surgical procedures, things like that. Yes, keep dirt out of open wounds and Drs. please wash your hands. The science proves the necessity for that. But I'm talking about everyday things, everyday activities. Yes it is a good practice to wear a face mask to avoid spreading germs when you are aware that you have those germs, or are going to be sticking your face into open wounds. Yup, that's a great idea, a necessary one in fact. But what about the use of hand sanitizer on a regular basis, as a matter of course? Is that a good thing? Some research is showing that it isn't.
 Germophobic, is that a word? It some cases it is called a disorder. Seems to me we are teaching that behavior these days. I see little children reaching for the hand sanitizer, hearing their concerns about, is it safe? Yes, I've heard small children say that, amazing isn't it? Wasn't anything I thought about, that's for sure. I picked wild berries and ate them, apples, peaches the same. Shined my apple on the seat of my pants before taking that first bite. Little kids, really little kids, put everything in their mouths. Why do they do that? Just checking it out is all, a natural thing to do. I want to know what it looks like, feels like and tastes like. I quickly learn what doesn't taste good. Still can't explain why I ate that white paste glue in kindergarten, but I sure did. Didn't hurt me. Eating those crab apples though, that's a different story.
 Now consider life in general. There are good days and bad days. We met good people, bad people and everything in between. Every interaction we have with others is like a spice, it seasons our lives. We soon learn to avoid the bitter and go for the sweet. Then we learn that too much sweet isn't a good thing either, a little bitter is necessary to add some zest. Yes and that's why we say adding zest to our live,. it is a seasoning. I'd say I was well seasoned. Too late to clean me up. Fact is, I'm best with just a quick rinse, having absorbed the flavors of life. I may not be the flavors you like though. Just don't kill me over it.   

the good old days

 It's hard for me to believe but I retired from the Navy 26 years ago, it'll be 27 come October. The years have just sailed off. I've been moored here in Greensboro ever since. I have enjoyed the fair winds and following seas that were wished for me. Okay, I''ll try to stop with the nautical references. Belay that, no I won't. I sometimes find myself wondering what it would be like onboard ship today. I'm certain the culture has changed, I know that it had changed a bit during my time as new policies and practices were implemented. The old salts complaining about the new. It's the way of the world, generation after generation. I would be interested too know what remains of the traditions I followed.
 When I went to basic training in Great Lakes Illinois, affectionately called Great Mistakes, a common phrase uttered by the Chief was, smoke'em if you got'em. Yes it would be time for a smoke and coke! I know that is no longer allowed, the practice was discontinued while on was on active duty. Toward the end of my enlistment there were ships that were " smoke " free the smoking lamp having been permanely extinguished! Do these young sailors today even know what the smoking lamp is? I saw the first women to serve aboard ships and was witness to that. Many of the old salts had grave concerns about that. First off, it is bad luck to have a woman on ship, any sailor knows that. Then there was going to be a list of troubles to follow. Yes , some of those issues did arise but as near as I could tell, everyone adjusted. Sure some old traditions had to be stopped and others modified. No more " pin ups " and no more magazines, even though we were only reading the articles! The old ways of being initiated into the brotherhood of being a sailor suddenly became hazing. A few of the rituals I experienced suddenly became unacceptable and damaging to new sailors. They got there feelings hurt. Oh, poor babies. The wheels began to fall off the whole system. Now it began to be all about being compassionate and fair! Yeah, liberal attributes, in my opinion, not conducive to building warriors. By the time I retired the " boots " ( new recruits ) where pretty soft. They could quit if they wanted to. When I was in boot camp if you screwed up or weren't catching on quickly enough you got sent to the Mickey Mouse Club! That's what we called that! I suppose today it may be called a remedial or alternative company for the challenged. You could tell those folks because they had to wear a stocking cap ( watch cap ). We called them raisin heads. I'm betting you had best not say that today. Probably offensive.
 Beyond all of that though I wonder how much of todays Navy I would recognize. I'm thinking a day on ship would be quite a bit different. One thing I noticed some time back was the Navy guys wearing fatigues. Yes, camo fatigues in blue. What's the thinking? If I fall overboard I can't be seen? Onboard, just who am I hiding from? What happened to jeans and shirt? Yes I saw them change the working uniform once while I was on active duty, didn't last long before they changed it back to the traditional bell bottoms and chambray shirt. I saw them change the Dress Uniform too, changed that back as well. Not sure what was going on with the females, sometimes they had skirts, then they were wearing the same dress uniform as the guys. Don't know what they are doing today. Are Navy guys now wearing berets? Seems like everyone else is anyway, something else I've noticed. Trying to look the part perhaps?
 The thing is each branch of the military is a society within itself. That society will change, evolve over the years. Is evolution always a good thing? Well evolve long enough and it leads to extinction, so you decide. Yes the old ways will fade away, die out, and be forgotten. During my time a great deal of the stereotypical image of sailors was alive and well. Drinking alcohol to excess, as long as you could handle it, was acceptable and expected. There were societal rules about that stuff. Get drunk and start something. it'll be finished quickly! Cigarette smoking? Who doesn't and why don't they? Misogynists? No one I knew ever heard of that word. Wolf, ladys man, and a hound certainly, badges of honor. Of course you made remarks concerning women's physical attributes and perhaps there availability for a little fun. Oh what were we thinking.
 I wonder what the popular tattoos are today, or has that tradition died somewhat. I saw a lot of " Mother " Tigers, Daggers with dripping blood, For God and Country, and rock and roll bands. The older guys had their Ships names tattooed on their arms, a lot of crossed anchors, and a sailor standing behind the eight ball. They were not to be visible when in uniform however. That wasn't strictly enforced but could be an issue. I wonder do they still call people from the various division on the ship by these names: snipes, twidgets, deck apes and skivvy wavers. Might be offensive these days. Does Jack of the Dust still roam below decks? Can you still bribe the night baker? Is the coffeec urn still filled twenty four hours a day? Do they still have movie night? What about mid-rats? are they still sending boots to get another ten foot of chow line, or assigning them to the mail buoy watch? I once sent a boot to the radio room to ask Petty Officer Chow, a female, for a fallopian tube. He got his face slapped and came back without one. I asked him why. He didn't have a clue, stupid boot. LOL. Ah the good old days. 

Scientific Truth

 The truth is the truth, even if only one person believes it. It doesn't make that person smarter than anyone else, just honest. Yes, it takes honesty to tell your truth when faced with a crowd of doubters. Far easier to just go along with the crowd. The greatest example of this can be found in the Bible. Jesus tells Peter you will deny me three times before the dawn. He does, and what is the reason? Fear, Peter was afraid of the crowd, that they would seize him. He denied ever having known Jesus at all!
He was afraid for his own safety.
 The thing is the authority was dictating what the truth was to be. Jesus was tried and convicted based on their truth. He was a blasphemer! And what is a blasphemer? Anyone that speaks in an irreverent fashion about God. In short, saying anything counter to the authority. Now when it comes to religion and religious belief there can be no right or wrong. There is only what the authority believes. In the Catholic Church the Pope is the ultimate authority. Indeed Catholics believe the Pope receives divine guidance directly from God. Every religion has someone that is the authority on that religious belief.
 The same applies with governments. Government is the authority. Even in cases where the truth is unclear, the government is the final authority simply because there has to be! Someone, something has to decide. In the United States what where the first laws concerned with? They were concerned with what we could do, what we were guaranteed as our right. But many took that to mean, if it doesn't say I can't, that means that I can. That's where the rest of the laws started appearing, in response to that. For those in favor it is a great thing, a wonderful thing, to those opposed it is the restriction of freedom. Now I can't do whatever it is I want to do. No different really than when our parents corrected us as children. It was for our own good. Isn't that the logic? It is, or is it the excuse to assert our authority? Parents are after all in control, exercising authority over the children. Governments are like that. What needs to be guarded against is abuse. At what point does abuse occur? Well now that depends upon the truth doesn't it? And whose truth must we obey? The authorities.
 The big question in all of that being; is truth only what we agree it to be? That is to say, what the authority says it is.  If that is the case, whenever we speak out in opposition we would be wrong. Is that the truth? No and we would all agree on that as well. Why? Because the truth is the truth even if only one person believes it. That begs the question; is the function of government to impose truth upon the people! The truth being the majority opinion, at least in our country it is supposed to be. In days of old the King made the truth. In our founding documents we held certain truths as self evident, among them, life , liberty and the pursuit of happiness. We have been defining and redefining those truths ever since. Consider the obvious. We have a right to life. Well now that has certainly changed hasn't it, beginning with the therapeutic abortion act in 1967. Yes, it was California that passed that legislation. And what is the reasoning behind this? Sources say this: " a woman has a right to make decisions about their reproductive systems and because they can exercise that right regardless of government policy. " In short women do not have to adhere to the truth as declared in the Declaration of Independence. So then, what is the truth? Do we have a right to life or not?
 Today we justify truth with science. That's the standard we have decided to impose. Science is supposed to be cold, hard, facts, unbiased, without any agenda,  unencumbered by human emotions. It's science! Science isn't supposed to deal in morality, only facts. We can see that by the removal of religious considerations when adjudicating the truth. The Bible clearly states, thou shalt not kill, yet we legalized that. How? By using science to justify that action, saying a fetus isn't a human being and therefore has no rights. You only have rights after you are born! Well, and even that is being changed as I write this piece. The authority has just used, for the first time, science to restrict religious practice in direct conflict with the first amendment to the constitution. Science trumps belief! The authority deciding it is too dangerous regardless of your belief. Seems like no big deal right? Well what science will be employed to further erode your rights? It's obvious that moral and ethical judgement will be taking a back seat to the authority. The most glaring example of that was Nazi Germany. The authority there imposing truth upon the population, or death. Yes, that was the choices you were left with. Peter felt the same way when Jesus was arrested. Deny or die. 

calm down

 It's easy to get caught up in all the hype. It seems to me that is the job of the press these days. No longer a forum to present unbiased, researched information. it's all headlines and bullet statements. At the moment I'm hearing about murder hornets! Better shelter in place. In between all the gloom and doom about covid 19 , nursing home deaths, puppies being abused, corrupt politicians and the children, its for the children, there is little else being talked about. Everyone is a hero and should receive special care and compensation, the front line workers waging a war to help you survive! Yes, it's all a gloomy situation, why it's a PANDEMIC! A word pulled from the dictionary and brought to the forefront. For a short while all we heard was N-95. You needed to wear a N-95 mask. and now any old piece of cloth will do! As long as you wear it when you are told to, that is. I suspect that will continue until you are properly vaccinated.  It's the only way we can be sure that you don't have covid-19, isn't that what is being stressed? The vaccine will not be to protect you, it will be necessary to protect others. Well, because you could be a carrier. But they aren't calling it that these days, you are being called a depositor! Notice the subtle change in wording? If you are a carrier that implies you have the virus, but a depositor, now a depositor just goes around leaving that virus everywhere! You have to be contained! A vaccine will do that, for others, not for you. after all you are already immune right, you are just spreading it around. 

 I'm not saying this virus, which by the way has a recovery rate north of 98%, isn't a serious thing. I'm not saying we shouldn't take precautions and measures to slow the spread. But I am saying don't get caught up in all the hype. There is considerable money to be made from all of this. make no mistake about that. Just a few months ago all we heard about was big pharma. Big pharma was to blame for health insurance costs, big pharma was killing the population, big pharma was an evil giant! They lobby congress buying whatever permits required, buying approval. And now what is the mantra? Big Pharma is going to save us. They are working at a fever pitch to develop a vaccine, in record time, bypassing protocols, testing, and trials to race to save us! And many of you are encouraging all of that. Yes, the promise is the vaccine will be free! Big Pharma to the rescue, they will provide this miraculous vaccine at no cost! No, they will be paid, by someone , somewhere, somehow and that is a fact. It may be China that provides the formulation! We aren't worried about any of that however, just get the vaccine! I'm going to make a prediction. The vaccine will become available following the election regardless of the outcome of that election. I'll go as far to say it'll be before Christmas, before the holiday shopping season begins in earnest. Commerce will resume. What we all need to do right now is, calm down! Don't believe all the hype. 

Who's to judge?

 There are things we all wish we could do. I wish I could sing. I have absolutely no talent for that at all. Fact is, I lack any credible musical ability at all. I have had a guitar for forty years, can form lots of chords, I can even assemble those chords in a progression to make a song. Still, it's a pretty sad attempt. That doesn't stop me from playing that guitar though, I just keep on strumming. It's just that I no longer subject others to that. There was a time when I would play thinking others may enjoy it, I was wrong. Others sometimes tolerated it and after sufficient libations joined in. Now I realize they were more interested in drowning me out that playing along. As for the singing part, I can sing along fairly well, knowing what notes not to try and sing, I just skip those. My father always said he couldn't sing well but he could sing loud! Don't think I ever heard him sing a single song, I took his word for it. If I am anything like him, he was correct, I can't sing.
 Now I've heard how you can learn to do anything if you really want to. That's true, you can. Thing is you can't learn to do it well without first having some ingrained talent in that area. I firmly believe that. I don't make any claims to being a writer or a poet but I do seem to have some bent in that direction. It was something I did as a kid too, write stuff I mean. Being a writer, of any kind, wasn't anything anyone I knew aspired to. It certainly wasn't an occupation in my neighborhood. In some ways it was like John Boy on the Waltons television show. I didn't have the passion they portrayed him having though. I also received no encouragement at all. Truth is I was teased a bit about that, it not being a manly profession or talent. No better to be a mechanic, carpenter or fisherman! Those were the men I knew and admired. You didn't have to be a hunter, but should have a willingness to kill, if necessary. But I think all of that stems from simple human nature. Your parents wanting you to emulate them! Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. If we are happy with our choices, our values, isn't it a natural thing to want your children to believe the same? Of course it is. Christians don't raise their children to be Muslims or Jews. Yes that also is the basis for prejudice and racism, but it is a normal human thing. Perhaps the strangest part in all of that is man is a curious creature. Before we learn to be prejudicial, we are curious. It is only when we learn the differences that it begins to change.
 I'm beginning to wander off just a bit. But the whole prejudicial thing applies to talents of all kinds. If you had never heard anyone else sing and play the guitar you might be amazed, impressed even. The reason being you have nothing to compare it to. How can you judge good and bad? If it pleases you, it's a good thing. That way with just about everything isn't it? Yes it is until other people tell you differently, what we call peer pressure. It is also related to social norms, what is normal? Depends on the society. My guitar playing and singing falls outside an accepted norm. I'm well aware of that and I'm okay with that knowledge. I still wish I could do both a whole lot better. I remain convinced that ain't gonna happen, ever. It is what it is and that is what it will remain. Please no platitudes, no encouragement to the contrary.
 I also have no talent for art. I'm terrible at that. I admire those that can do that. My oldest brother was quite good at it. He dabbled in it but didn't pursue it. I often wondered why. Perhaps for the same reason I didn't pursue writing, being an artist wasn't something the normal guy did. There was a man, a friend to the family and a business partner to my uncle named Meredith Graves. We called him Uncle Gravy. He was an artist, worked for Disney Studios at one point, but I knew him as a carpenter. I asked him why and he told me he became bored with drawing pictures all day, every day. I saw his drawings and they were amazing, to him, they were just okay, functional, practical, and uninspired. Yes he realized they were very good but nothing exceptional. At least in his view they weren't. I can't say but suspect in a world filled with artists, filled with comparisons, he felt that way. As for me, it doesn't bother me that I can't paint, draw, sketch or any of that. It would come in handy but nothing I aspire to even try to do.
 I do feel frustrated with the guitar and singing at times. It just seems like it is something anyone should be able to do. I've had a few everyday heroes that can sing and play. With just three or four chords and the ability to carry a tune, they entertain for hours. I've always admired that. Sure the really great guitarists, think Eric Clapton, are simply amazing but they practice for hours every day, not to mention they are born with that ability. You can't learn to play like Eric Clapton, you are born with that. Just like you can't learn to paint a Picasso. Imitate perhaps but not create. I was born with no musical or artistic talent. Well you can't have it all, can you? You can, if you convince yourself you do. All depends upon the judge doesn't it? Yes I'd say it does. 

Keeping faith

 Today we observe Memorial Day. The only Poppy I have seen is a virtual one on Facebook. I haven't been out and about much, just a few trips to the grocery store and one to Lowe's for items to mount my Flag. No where did I see anyone with poppies. The department of Veterans affairs restricted placing flags on the veterans graves. I wonder if they issued any guidance on the poppies. I don't know. I do know that many of the younger folks today have no clue about the significance of those poppies, or Flanders Field. But I will continue to tell anyone that listens about that. There are many that are confused about just what we are commemorating in the first place. But all of that has been written about by myself and many others. I am pleased to read that in some places the Flags were still placed and honors given.
 Eight years ago I composed this poem to remember and honor those veterans that, as Lincoln said, gave the last full measure of devotion. It is those that we commemorate today.

                                                                        Those that marched before

Hear the music playing
Feel the beating of the drum
See our colors flying
Proudly in the sun

Our boots are brightly polished
Our uniforms so neat
The sergeant calling cadence
With the marching of our feet

Old soldiers and Sailors
Marching side by side
Marching to remember
Our comrades that have died

Never to be forgotten
Remembered forever more
A grand parade to celebrate
Those that marched before.

A.B. Reichart

 There isn't much more I can say. The final verse of In Flander's Field  says this:
 " The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders Field. "  John McCrae

I will hold the torch high, I will keep faith with those who died. May they sleep, wherever they lie. 

a false promise

 Popularity is a false promise, empty, devoid of substance. It is this promise of popularity that causes the majority of strife in the world. What's the popular opinion, the popular choice, the popular response at the moment. It changes moment to moment like tendrils of smoke rising to disappear on a breeze. In todays electronic, connected world, that has been accelerated. Going viral is one term applied. Popularity spreading like a virus, transmitted from one to another, eventually to be abandoned, replaced by the next virus. Indeed, the word virus itself implies something bad, something we catch and seek to rid ourselves of. Popularity can be like that. We've all heard the complaints from the celebrities about that. They surrendered their private lives, their thoughts, their actions, whether intentional or not, to achieve that fame. Some turn to drugs, alcohol and therapists seeking a reprieve from that. Other take their own lives. The price of popularity is a heavy toll. Fortunately it is a toll I haven't had to pay and don't expect to receive a bill anytime in the near future. It's my thinking the fortunate ones achieve fame and popularity after death.
 Fame and popularity are separate things. You can have one without the other. Yes, it is called infamy when that fame is judged a bad thing in the context of history. Consider people like a Hitler. At one time in history he did enjoy fame and popularity! The German people loved him, for a while anyway. Commodus was a very popular Roman Emperor, for a while. Like Hitler it lasted as long as he gave the people what they wanted.
 Therein is the key to popularity and fame, giving others what they want. That is the cost. What you have may begin as a gift, an offering, but others become demanding. Soon the people wish to modify that gift, embellish it somewhat, personalize it. And that is where the trouble begins. It always goes bad when you offer that gift expecting a return, as did Hitler and Commodus. The gifts were offered for their own good, not the good of others. The trouble began when the people realized that. For many that realization came far too late. Yet many have failed at learning from the lessons of the past, seeking that fame, that popularity. They are willing to surrender much in the quest for the promise of happiness. Popularity brings happiness, right? Consider carefully your response. Are you saying what you feel, or what you have been taught is the correct answer? It's tough to be honest with yourself isn't it. It is when it comes to questions such as that. Questions concerning our moral fortitude are challenging. We know the correct answer, the popular answer, and are compelled to provide that. To do otherwise will place us in jeopardy.
 John Donne penned the famous words, " no man is an Island, entire of itself " expressing the need for each of us to be a part of something bigger. Well, not a need but a reality, we are all a part of something bigger. It doesn't make any difference if we want that or not, it's the way it is. But we can choose what part we wish to be. Yes each of us require something from another, just as Donne pointed out, but we have no right of expectation from that other. Expectations are often accompanied by disappointment. And what is disappointment? Not getting what we want. Popularity promises fulfillment and that is why we seek that so readily. It's an empty promise however. The truth is fulfillment can only be achieved within yourself, on your private island. The world around you affects that island with or without your permission. Still, when you lie awake in the evening, alone with your thoughts, secure in your world, fulfillment is possible. It is not dependent upon anything else.   

Fickle

 Memorial day is fast approaching once again. The unofficial beginning of summer. This year summer is going to be different. Well, at least all the activities will be different. I'm hoping that this serves to show some that life can go on without all the parties, attractions and frivolous entertainment. I'm hoping it serves to unite some families, bring them closer to understanding one another. But I'm afraid that's a pipe dream, there are just too many electronic distractions. The biggest of which we carry in our hand. We have all seen the meme's concerning that. Groups of people. sitting together all staring at their phones. It will continue, just not in such large groups. It's a shame how quickly we seek a distraction from each other these days. It wasn't so all that many years back, but it wasn't as easy to accomplish either. The same was said about television, the " boob " tube, remember that? Before that it was radio, it was a more limited thing, but yes, radio programs were maligned as a waste of time. Today we often see that portrayed as the family sitting around the radio, enjoying Amos and Andy or listening to the Grand Old Opry. It's a nice mental picture, quaint even, but not always so. Do you really believe whole families enjoyed the same programs? Highly unlikely and I'm sure Mom and Dad controlled the dial.

 There was some controversy about the tradition of placing flags on the graves of our veterans. The Veterans administration declaring it too risky for the Boy Scouts, Girl Scouts and veterans organizations to carry that out. I am pleased to hear that, for the most part, it is being done on some level anyway. Personally I couldn't believe it. We are honoring those that died in battle! Yes, we are honoring those that had their lives taken in exchange for our freedom. That's what memorial day is all about. To have those in authority decide it is just too dangerous to honor those men is just ridiculous. Did those men decide the battle was too dangerous? Well like I said I'm pleased to hear that most are continuing the tradition in some fashion anyway. Those deciding that it is too dangerous? Parade ground Patriots is what I call them. Those anxious to receive the praise, the accolades, wear their medals and ribbons, and tell of the great deeds and dangers, as long as it is safe to do so! 

 But the masses are growing restless. Civil disobedience will force a change. Folks are only going to stand for this for so long. Even those insisting it's too early, we should shelter in place. it's science and we should heed the science, are seeking that release. Isn't that what all this " testing " is really about? Once we have tested a sufficient number, with contact tracing in place to control your movements, those in power can feel justified. They will have an excuse, we did everything we could, it's your fault if there is a second wave! You can't say you weren't warned. we have your e-maul address! It will be economic reality and the peoples demand for " entertainment " that ultimately reopens summer. People will adapt to anything as long as they are entertained. Look to history, look to Rome, if you have any doubts about that. People, basic human nature hasn't changed at all over the centuries. We are all still the same creatures, only social customs and sensibilities have changed. We are a fickle bunch, all of us. The less fickle we become, the more we are told we are wrong! We become labeled as inflexible, judgmental, and unintelligent. We are told we should conform, change our ways in response to the crowd. We are just old fashioned! Yes, it isn't fashionable! And just what is fashion? It's an ever changing thing dependent upon others telling you it's a good thing! It's popular. It doesn't have to make sense or be practical. Fickle? Yes indeed the masses are a fickle bunch. Give it a little more time, something else will occupy our minds, whether it is another pandemic, nuclear threat, apocalypse, or a really funny television commercial. We will all be distracted. Maybe a celebrity or athlete will entertain us. A you tube video or viral video. Anything at all. This is just another transition. A transition to a more virtual world, one where we can control what we see and hear. 

bearing gifts

 I just heard on the news a new testing program being implemented. It's a drive up test at CVS pharmacies. That's correct, a drive up testing center, where you don't get out of your car, the test is self administered, you do it yourself while a pharmacy employee watches. All your information is gathered, the test sent out and results in 24 to 48 hours! Contact tracing is the real goal here. Just drive up! It's my feeling anyone that takes this " free " test will be contacted later on for vaccinating, regardless of the test results. I'm thinking the " positive " results will far outnumber the negative, call it a hunch. As I mentioned to a friend of mine, beware a government bearing gifts! This testing is at no cost! Well now, somebody is paying somebody! CVS isn't paying an employee to perform this service without reimbursement. the lab isn't reading those tests for free and the contact tracers aren't working for free either! No cost to you right? The biggest fallacy that people believe today, the government is paying for it, it's free. Sure it is, like free healthcare, it doesn't cost you anything. That's right it doesn't, it costs everyone else. But, it's free. 

 In order to get this test you don't have to have any symptoms, nothing but your willingness to share your personal information. Name, address, physical and e-mail, and phone number at a minimum. Is it tracing or tracking? Make no mistake about it, your movement will be tracked. Presently they do need your phone for that, well until the chip is in place anyway. Once you are properly chipped. that requirement will no longer be necessary. But don't get upset, that chip is for others, it's the only way you can protect others from you! You might, could, possibly, spread germs. We can't keep you home forever but we can track you. If we provide " free " testing for everyone we can begin to allow people to roam a bit more, giving those folks a sense of security. Isn't that what those tests are really for? Free testing from a compassionate government. 

 Say what you will but it all just strikes me as a bit suspicious. The government can't round us up but they can have us drive up! How convenient is that. The government already has a big part of the population scared to leave their homes. People are insisting that everyone wear a mask, stay six feet away from each other as a normal way of life. People are literally fighting each other over this!  The church doors are closed while Walmart remains open. The Veterans Administration told the Boy Scouts and Girls Scouts to not place Flags at the cemeteries, it's too dangerous! But it won't be for long, not if you drive up and give your sample. Yes, your DNA can and I suspect will be extracted from that sample. Once entered in the national database you are as good as chipped! Did you know the government can't take your DNA until after you are arrested and by a court order? Of course if you voluntarily provide that sample, well that's a different scenario. I'm thinking I would read the fine print on that free testing.

 I'm not saying this virus is a hoax, a conspiracy, or isn't a serious threat to the public in general. I am saying it is my belief there is far more to this than we are being told. It all grows more suspicious to me with each passing day. Now, when the government starts handing out " free " stuff I begin to raise a flag. The first indication was the stimulus package. Free money for all, loans for all, and we just might do it again. Well I figured they shut down commerce, that pretty much took down the soaring stock market, then if we start handing out money we don't have, that will further destroy the economy.  So now having created the need, more free stuff! Free testing. But what is the cost? Think about that. A test administered by the government, for free, that will provide the results to " confirm " the current narrative? Can we trust the results? Do you believe the government? Do you trust those results to be 100% accurate? Of course not, no test is 100% accurate, a second round of " testing " may be required. You know to prevent a reoccurrence,  that is unless you get the " vaccine " and the government is working on that. The vaccine will be 100% effective! Sure it will. It even says in the Bible, " beware the man bearing gifts "  

who is to profit?

 It has been reported that universal testing is becoming available. The push is on. Everyone should be tested for Covid 19 whether they have symptoms or not! The media has been doing their best to make everyone paranoid. Many are sufficiently scared to submit to testing or anything else just by the government saying so. Control is being achieved. The Mayor of Baltimore has announced all summer gatherings of 250 people or more are canceled. The larger churches have gatherings exceeding that number, are they to remain closed? The Mayor didn't mention that. Events include fourth of July celebrations, Art Scape, Hon fest, and others that generates millions of dollars. The message is; we mustn't gather in groups anymore for the good of public health! Well, at least until everyone is tested. And how are we to know when that happens? We won't, but the plan is to get sufficient numbers of people to get a " vaccination. " Yes, this is turning into a campaign for a, as yet to be developed, vaccine.  Can we trust the results of a mandated testing program when positive results are to the benefit of those insisting upon the testing? In my way of thinking it would be like taking your car to a mechanic. I don't care if it just rolled off the assembly line yesterday, he's going to tell you, you need something. Hey before you even buy that new car the salesman are trying to sell you undercoating or some protection plan! Yeah, you tested positive for Covid 19.. That doesn't mean you will actually get sick from it but you need to be vaccinated. It's not for you, it's for others! A useful tool if you are selling a product, even if you make that product " free. " The test was negative, but you should get a vaccination to prevent you from getting this deadly disease. Hey it has a mortality rate of nearly 2%. It has been estimated that 88,000 people die of alcoholism every year but we kept the liquor stores open! The reason? It was to prevent alcoholics from suffering withdrawal and possibly dying! No cry for testing, no cry for a vaccine, no cry for a cure at all. No, just keep the doors open. 

 Now I understand the need for precautions. What I don't understand is this push for control. The government has closed the doors to the churches, closed the door to business, the economy is in a downward spiral. Yes the government is giving out stimulus money, adding to unemployment checks, handing out loans to small businesses. The reality is even the government will run out of money. Then what? You need only look as far back the great depression. Soup lines, homelessness. poverty and government help! The civilian conservation corps was established to put hundreds to work. Yes, they were government projects, construction projects accomplished using the cheapest labor possible. But it was a great thing, right? Was it really. Yes social security was established, a social program. A program that has since been expanded to include just about anyone at all. And today I'm being told until you are tested and vaccinated nothing will reopen, nothing will return as you once knew it. You will submit to the new order. A vaccine is the only answer! 

 As with all things you only need to answer one question. Who is to profit? You figure that out and you will quickly understand the situation. Yes, there is a lot of money and power at stake here. Make no mistake about that. I have said it from day one, and I haven't changed my opinion one bit. There is a great deal more to this than we are being told. This is a global thing, not just the United States. International finances are at stake. Think oil, think Asian manufacturing, think globally! Who is to profit? The whole global warming gambit failed to achieve the results some had hoped. The whole terrorist things failed to accomplish global instability. But a pandemic? Now, here's an opportunity if we can only leverage it correctly. I don't believe it is a big conspiracy, that this was planned. I do believe it is being used as an opportunity by those that control the purse strings! If history is to be believed that is the case. The Black death changed the European economy, the Spanish Flu in 1918 altered the economy in the United States. Fear is a great motivator, religions use fear to motivate, governments use fear, heck your own parents used fear to motivate you. The invisible enemy that will kill us all, unless we are tested and vaccinated that is.  

connections

 I left my hometown back in 1976 for the final time. That is to say, that was the last year I actually lived there. Through social media I have reestablished some connections with that past. That began about ten years ago or so. At least that is when I first appeared on Facebook. Over time my computer skills improved and I discovered groups. Then I discovered the world of blogging, that was through a person I had known from high school. I was fascinated that you could just post your own blogs and they would be available to anyone on the internet. I still it is an amazing thing. As I posted and wrote connections were made, although not always clear to me. I recognize family names on occasion, you know what I mean, but am uncertain. Not wanting to hurt feelings or seem stupid I will not always ask about their ancestors. Yes, I'm at that age, I'm sometimes talking about ancestors. As an example I recently saw a posting about someone that had passed. The name is familiar. But it must be a son or grandson of the person I'm thinking of. That person was old! But then I have to remind myself that when I was a teenager someone in there thirties was old! I've been fooled by that in the past, better not to say anything.
 So not having lived in that town, or area for forty four years now connections are thin indeed. I expect I know more people in the cemetery than I do above ground. Chatting, reading posts and looking at photographs have revealed some things to me. Some things have been a surprise, while other things have remained the same. I hear the same old complaints that existed when I lived there, just updated a bit. Apparently helicopters are becoming a nuisance more so that automobile traffic. Well, that and landscapers! But beyond all of that everyday stuff that is to be expected no matter where you live. it is the social attitude that I observe. If that is the proper way to express that. I have found some of my " camp " still reside there, while the other camp has grown in size. Being a native son I can see that. Some things really haven't changed at all. Although I can see the power shifting, or should I say slipping away, from those that traditionally held that position. Old power, like old money, being replaced by the new. Wealth and power go hand in hand. I hear talk of building affordable housing. We need a place to house the " natives. " After all, the natives maintain the amusement park don't they? I couldn't help but think of the original natives and how " reservations " were made for them. A parallel could be made to " sharecroppers " housing provided for the hired hands.
 The thing is, it is nothing new. It was that way forty four years ago, and forty years before that. It's always been that way. I am connected to that past. Even though I am far away now I can still see parts slipping away. The house where I was raised is gone now, the corner store where I went as a child, gone but rebuilt, rebuilt in an unrecognizable form. The home of an old childhood friend no longer sits where it once did, I've been told it was relocated. Not an unusual thing for my hometown. Many visible things have remained unchanged though, or at least in a recognizable form. It is the people that that I miss, not the landscape or buildings. I have found a few living in cyberspace, who could have imagined such in years past? The connections are strained by time and distance however, no denying that. The experiences of those I knew all those years ago are certainly different than my experiences. Thirty years ago my fathers ashes were placed in the cemetery next to his mother and father. As I stood there I couldn't help but think, he'll be the last. It was his wish to be buried there, between a mother he never knew, and a father he knew only a short time. Now resting in eternity with them both. I will not be joining him there, nor will any of my siblings. Indeed my sisters' ashes are in Florida and one brother here in Maryland. Most likely Maryland will be where I rest. But who can say. I left my home for the first time when I was 18 years old, little did I know; when I went back, home wasn't where I had left it. Its' been said home is where the heart is, and I agree. Home is found within your heart, not on a map. Took a few years to figure that one out. 

you started it

 Well it would seem another observance has escaped me. It's strange too, given the amount of time I spend on social media and listening to the main stream media. But this past Saturday, May the 16th, was Armed Forces Day. I heard no mention of that. It is day to honor active duty, retired, reserved and former members of any branch of the U.S. military. We were to fly our flags. This day of observance was created on the 31 of August in 1949. That made this the fiftieth anniversary. That was when all the different departments of the military were joined under a single department, the department of defense. This year the President of the United States, the Commander in Chief of all the armed forces, was presented with the flag of a new department. The Space Force. Yes, that's correct the space force was officially created seventy years after the Air Force became a separate force from the Army. Prior to that it had been, the Army Air Force. I'm as guilty as anyone of not remembering this day to honor our servicemembers. I'm certain if it was made a holiday, a three day weekend, none of us would have missed it! Flags would have flying and thank you for your service all around. I feel a little ashamed that I wasn't aware.
 I think I found this a little more disturbing because of a conversation I had yesterday on Facebook. Someone had posted a meme that I replied too that caused a little friction. Well that's not surprising or disturbing to me, happens all the time. But this meme was telling me I had no right to complain about social distancing or wearing a face mask. No, I had to do those things to protect the elderly among us. That's fine, except it went on to describe those elderly as, forcibly drafted in the service, they had to give up years of their lives, they saw friends die, and suffered irreparable psychological damage protecting your right to bitch and that's why you shouldn't bitch! Well, first off they won that war, they preserved that right for you, me and everyone else to come. I took exception to implying that they were forced to do anything, I see it as answering the call to duty, and then to suggest that they are all damaged! Just what the heck are you saying? I was informed that meme was saying I would be disrespecting those veterans by not following the rules. First off I didn't say I wouldn't follow the rules, I did say I thought it disrespectful to call them damaged! But I was accused of twisting everything to cause an argument. I had to chuckle a bit at that, so you're saying, " you started it " LOL. Quite the intelligent rebuttal I would say. I left my opinion on that meme, a meme attempting to somehow shame people into obedience by using their grandparents and the elderly that were somehow forcibly drafted to fight a war to protect your rights, rights that you are now being told not to use. If I exercise the right that these elderly folks fought to preserve I'm being disrespectful to them? Then just what the heck did they fight for? Because they were forcibly drafted, forced to surrender years of their lives, and suffer damage? And all I'm supposed to do is say. Thank You for your Service. " No, I don't think so but that's my opinion. If that upsets you, remember, you started it. Makes me wonder.
                                                                                               

 Remember people laughed at the Wright Brothers too, I do find it amusing that they chose the Star Trek symbol thing though. Scotty, beam me up. 

Just one battle

 Memorial day is coming up. It is a day to remember all those that lost their lives in the defense of freedom. Yes, Memorial day is for the dead. It is something I remind people of each year. The true meaning seems to be getting lost and replaced by a holiday. It was never intended as a holiday, but rather as a reembrace. A day devoted to the memory of those we loved. It wasn't a day of celebration. But like a lot of things over the years sensibilities change and so does the attitude of the people. Consider this; there was a time when people wore black, the music would be a dirge, accompanied by lamentation. Today some call a funeral a celebration, whatever genre of music the deceased enjoyed may be playing, and people are downright jovial! The occasion is the same, the observance is not. A different point of view? Yes, you could say that. 

 I've heard some talk of erecting some sort of memorial for those that have lost their lives to the COVID-19 virus. A memorial to Nurses, Doctors, Janitors and anyone else associated with the health care field! A memorial to all the hero's! Of course , it would mention those that actually died as well, at least a number would be shown to represent that. I couldn't help but think how not too long ago memorials were being taken down that offended some people. The individuals or events no longer worthy of being memorialized. But now, for a virus, we should erect a memorial? A sort of " neutral " memorialization? We are not glorifying the virus, but remembering the dead. A celebration of the efforts of the fallen? We do hear this being called a war.  A war against an invisible enemy. It does sound scary, doesn't it? I don't know I find a bit of incongruity in tearing down actual war memorials and erecting memorials to remember a virus. Yes, people are victims of that virus, killed by an invisible enemy, well except we see the microscopic image of that enemy every day on the news.  You know real people also died in those wars, even the ones you find offensive. Yes it may have been 155 years ago but they were still real people. What if we erect a memorial to all the hero's of this war. In the years to come we discover these hero's were using the wrong treatment, the wrong therapy, or drugs? Through no fault of their own and with the best on intentions they contributed to the death toll, do we then tear down the memorials? We dismiss the dead? We just forget about that? 

 I just question the reasoning behind erecting a memorial in response to a pandemic. A search of the world will yield few memorials to any pandemics. Yes there are a few to the 1918 Spanish Flu. Those memorials are to remember the dead. A sort of national tombstone. But for the most part the thinking has always been to move on. 

 The strange thing about memorials is that they are erected for the living. They are erected to ease the grief or loss, in short, to make us feel better about ourselves. I think the objective is a transference. We hope to move our grief to the memorial. That is also the reason memorials can turn into celebrations. We have forgotten the grief caused by the event and can celebrate the fact we are alive. We are survivors! That is what I hear every day, all day lately. I'm a survivor. Doesn't matter if I was engaged in a major conflict, or went to the Walmart, I'm a survivor. Let's celebrate. 

 Are memorials a necessity? Yes I'd say they are, man has erected memorials since ancient times. The meaning, the sentiment will change over time. Memorials will be erected and torn down. Should we erect a memorial in response to this pandemic? I see no purpose in that. The individuals that lost their lives to this virus will certainly be remembered by those that knew and loved them. You may ask, what of the health care workers and others that lost their lives? I say, they lost their lives doing their jobs and are as much a hero as anyone that went to war. They fought for a greater cause assuming the risk just as a soldier who enters the battlefield. Their cause was to ease the suffering, to provide comfort and reassurance, to do their very best to preserve life. If a memorial is to be erected, memorialize that., not a virus! This virus is only one battle, not a war. 

subtleties

 It's my thinking the hardest person to please should be yourself. That seems to be at odds with what I constantly hear. Well I realize that others are trying to get me to buy something. It doesn't matter if it is a product, a service, or merely an idea. The goal for them is to get me to buy into whatever they are selling. I suppose the same could be said for myself, I'm not much different from anyone else. I would like you to buy into what I'm saying, no one enjoys disagreement or being told they are wrong. But the real struggle is to convince yourself. That's why I say the hardest person to please should be yourself. Of course the real issue with that is validation. How do you measure success? Is it fame and fortune? Or is it merely a sense of contentment with what you are doing? Are you pleased with the result? Yesterday I wrote, " when your thoughts require validation, think again. " What I was thinking about was being content. That you have decided. If you are thinking about it and waiting for someone else to validate that thought, you surely haven't decided.
 I hear an awful lot about being empowered these days. It has become a catch phrase. I feel empowered, he is empowered, you can be empowered. Just what does that mean? The dictionary says it means to give someone the authority or power to do something; it can also mean make someone stronger and more confident. The issue I have with that is in order to become empowered you have to surrender your own power. Empowerment comes from an outside source. Allowing others to control your happiness, your desire, or motivation is creating a dependency. What happens when that " empowerment " is no longer given? When you no longer receive your fix? It's a subtle difference, but empowerment is not the same as encouragement. I'm all for encouraging others to do their best at whatever they choose to do. I will provide support, help them if I can. But the thing is, they shouldn't be dependent upon that.
 There are many articles, essays and therapies for those that are their own worst critics. In fact it is considered a flaw. One of the " flaws " according to some experts is that you are listening to the voice between your ears. Yes, that's what some say. They want you to listen to them. I'm thinking I should be listening, as I am the only one that can hear them! It can't be a good thing to ignore that and just listen to what others are telling me. No the majority of the time others are thinking about their own experiences. The reason is simple enough, they haven't experienced mine. All things being equal, doesn't mean all things are equal.
 I notice the subtleties in the choice of words. It happens over time. It is what leads to discussion and sometimes to disagreement. What do the words mean? Words are meant to express our thoughts and feelings. That is the reason for such a tremendous variety of words in the first place. I often find myself struggling to find just the right word. Yes I could go to the thesaurus and search one out but will the reader understand it? Now I have a fairly good vocabulary, but there are thousands of words I've never heard of or used. It can also come off as pretentious if you start inserting hundred cdollar words in your writing. I will go to the dictionary when I don't understand the word but that is tiresome if I have to do that too often. When I'm reading I hear a story in my head and I don't like it interrupted. I'm thinking others feel the same way.  I notice the subtle difference between empowered and encouraged. I am grateful for any encouragement I receive, but I am not dependent upon that. To feel empowered comes with a subtle implication that I was given permission, or validated by another, to feel the way I do. That could be withdrawn at any moment. Encouragement is a gift not a dependence. Subtle, yes it is.
 Another word that I hear all the time is judge or judgement. Today it is something that you are told not to do. I know, I hear it frequently, don't judge. But just what is judgement? Let's go to the dictionary. It says; the ability to make considered, or come to sensible conclusions, an opinion or conclusion, punishment from a divine source. So when I hear people saying don't judge, I'm hearing them say, don't make a considered, sensible or common sense conclusion. What they really mean to say is, I disagree with your judgement and it is wrong of you to make that judgement. They say that before they even hear your judgement! It's an amazing thing really. Why is that? It's because they want to change the " judgement " to align with their own feelings. The common sense, considered and logical judgement is not what they want to hear. Fact is, it isn't judgement they want to avoid, it is the adjudication that troubles them. What is adjudication? The evaluation of the evidence. Subtle but powerful nonetheless.
 Well I'm not sure how I arrived at this conclusion. I began with one thought and ended on another. It happens to me all the time. I suppose I just haven't decided yet. I'm not real pleased with the outcome. Still these are my thoughts, freely shared with anyone that cares to take an interest." My thoughts do not require validation as they are my own, and when I choose to share them, they remain the same. " Well, until I decide to change them anyway. And that's a decision in itself. Self powered, not empowered. In short, I don't need anyone's permission. Hey now, that, that is empowering! LOL 

a conversation

 Perhaps life is nothing more than a conversation with God. It continues until one or the other decide to end it. That's the free will portion. Perhaps there is no such thing as fate or destiny, just a dialogue. Are my blogs, poems and postings merely a transcript of that conversation? I'm thinking that it could very well be. The great authors just had a more intelligent or thoughtful discussion than I. Or is that the great authors write what others wish they had thought of? What they wish they had questioned? I can't say but it's a possibility. I have said often there is little one can write or say that hasn't been written or said before. God, whatever you conceive that deity to be, has certainly heard it all before. He listens by our will, our belief only. If we do not believe, who is listening? That's a question I have asked myself and do not have an answer for. 

 Our first years we are limited to listening. We have to learn the language, learn to understand. Over time we learn the proper response to elicit an action that pleases us. Then we begin to learn how to manipulate the words to avoid the things we find unpleasant. I don't want to, is one of the first phrases we learn to employ. It is a declaration. We will spend the rest of our lives struggling between I don't want to and what is right. Sometimes we call that responsibility. At other times we call it maturity. When something is mature that indicates it is fully developed. The problem we all face is changing our minds, making alterations, never allowing ourselves to be fully developed, fully committed to an idea. Indeed, in society today that is encouraged as the mature thing to do! To remain committed, steadfast in your belief, will quickly get you labeled with a string of adjectives none of which are flattering. Bullheaded. stubborn, headstrong, inflexible, intransigent, intractable, obdurate, mulish and pigheaded to name a few. 

 After we understand the language we begin to learn what others think about everything. We begin to consider different views, different responses to situations. We listen as they explain the who, what, where , when and why of things. Then we process that information through the filter of our own experiences. The theory being, the more experience one has, the better they have processed information. And it is there that the wheels begin to fall off the wagon for some. Those folks begin to place too much trust, too much credence in what they are being told, even when that information goes contrary to their own experience. That's what Mom means when she asks; if Joey jumped off the bridge I guess you would too? You were listening to Joey, not to yourself. 

 The thing is we try to reconcile others experiences with our own. We do this by adopting or rejecting information. That's where the conversation with God begins. We all have an inherent sense of right and wrong. That has been observed and noted by man since the beginning. Ancient Greek philosophers knew that, heck, everybody knows that. Is it conscience or God, or is God our conscience? That is something for each of us to decide upon. Is God an out side force acting upon us? Or do we exert that force ourselves through our conscience? 

 Do we develop a conscience or are we born with that? I'd say we are born with an innate sense of right and wrong. Doctors may call it a response to stimuli, but to me, it's the same thing. As a baby when I'm hungry I know that ain't right, I cry out trusting the message is clear. I may cry for other reasons as well. But I will also smile or laugh. As my ability to communicate develops I begin to ask or make demands. How others respond to those requests and demands will influence my conscience. Well, in truth  how I perceive that conscience. That's where I decide what is fair. The issue is; being right and being fair doesn't always coincide with my view of morality and ethics. 

 Where do those qualities originate? We are not born with those qualities at all, they are learned traits. So that begs the question; just who is the teacher? Society is the answer, It can not be otherwise. We learn those traits in order to live in the society. If we adopt traits contrary to the society we will be rejected. Over our lifetime society changes. Some of us respond by just changing our morals and ethics to fall in line with the majority. Acquiescence becomes a habit, becomes comfortable to our conscience. Many of us will not alter or surrender our moral and ethical traits. We are the ones that will cry out! We cry out in opposition to what we know to be wrong. Our conscience will not allow it to be otherwise. We will keep on having that discussion until the end. That's true even if we are only talking to ourselves. One day the conversation will be over, then we will have an eternity to review our choices. A new conversation begins. I'm confident I'll have someone to talk too. I suppose I could just agree with everyone else but to do that I would have to dismiss my conscience. And that's something I just can't do. Shakespeare said: To thine own self be true. Whatever the consequences may be, you have to be true to yourself first. Perhaps life is nothing more than a conversation with God.   

hopefully

 So I'm driving the car and my phone rings. I tell the wife to answer it because, you know, I don't use the phone and drive. So she picks it up but it is just a message. I've got a new phone and still don't remember the tone for an actual call or the one for a message. Turns out there are two messages on there. The first one she reads and gives me a puzzled look. What the heck is this? At my first opportunity I stop  the car and look at the phone message. It says, Hi this is Megan. She is asking when I want to schedule a tattoo. Hmm, I don't know Megan and haven't been considering a tattoo. So I just report that call as spam and block it. Problem solved. The next message is from the medical group that I use. They wants to assure me they were still there for all my medical needs. They aren't taking patients in person, but would gladly schedule a tele-med session. I felt like a was getting a call soliciting vinyl siding or something.
 My wife asks about that and I explain to her how they want to just do a doctors visit over the phone or computer. She just laughs saying, yeah I know with the video thing. I reply yup, I'm not doing that, it would be like having phone sex! I mean, the doctor will " look " at whatever issue you have right. What if that area is, shall we say, an intimate area like they sat in the television commercials. Am I to just stick my parts in front of the phone? Not me, next thing you know you're a you tube sensation! I have no confidence in confidentiality with any of that. In Baltimore they have contracted airplanes that fly over the city with cameras in an attempt to curtail crime. People are in an uproar, they have an expectation of privacy while on the streets! This airplane could take a picture of them while they are committing a crime and that's not fair. And now my doctor wants me to expose myself on the internet? I don't think so. You want me to put that phone where?
 Well times sure have changed that's for certain. When I was younger we would say, I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole! Today the government calls it social distancing and six foot is good. I don't think they have developed a cure for cooties yet though, a big issue years back. In " reopening " the state there are several guidelines being implemented. One of them is if you are going to a restaurant or store you will now have to provide your name, address, and telephone number. The purpose of that? Contact tracing. That way, remember this is for your safety, if you come into contact with someone that has tested positive for Covid 19, you can be contacted. I'm certain that information wouldn't be used for anything ese, you know, like trying to sell you stuff. Nah, it would be completely confidential information. Heck we are already getting messages on the computer that we should contact so and so because we have been exposed to Covid 19 and need to take action right away. It's bad enough that Lowes and Joanne's Fabric, among others, always ask for a phone number when you check out. Do you have an e-mail address? No concern with privacy with any of that though. I suppose this " contact tracing " has been going on a lot longer than I was aware of, it's just now they are open about it! In fact the government is now making it a requirement. Think about that, no phone, no address, no e-mail, no service! And I'm equally certain that no one would give false information about any of that either. But given time, we will all be chipped at birth, just scan a fingertip or whatever. You will be assigned a number. Just like a secret agent man, they've given you a number and taken way your name. Hey we already get a social security number, it's not too much of a stretch to be chipped. It'll be for your own good, your own safety. That way you can be sure you will receive whatever government benefits the government decides to provide you. No chip, no benefits. Unchipped people will be contained in specific areas so as not to come into contact with the " compliant " citizens. It'll be for the good of others, putting the unchipped into containment areas I mean. That will be for the good of others and something all good citizens will fully support. It'll be your parotitic duty in fact. Report the unchipped to the proper authority. The government authority needs to know just who is coming into contact with whom. In fact they need to know, who, where what, why and when. It's for others. Don't be selfish, share that information with the authorities. You should have no expectation of privacy at any time. Are we to receive a vaccine or a chip? You decide. They are saying that no one will be safe until we are all vaccinated! Or is it that we will all be chipped? Sounds like science fiction doesn't it? Hopefully, it is.     

Just fun

 On Facebook you often see things from the past. Usually it is those do you remember memes. It will contain a picture of an object for you to identify. They do serve to make you feel a bit smarter, shall we say superior to those that don't have a clue what the object is. Yes, it's true, we all like to have that secret knowledge. I know something you don't know. I admit to enjoying that. Sometimes I look at the object and wonder how anyone could not know what it is. Then I think about it and realize many of these younger people, and that includes younger people in their forties now, have never seen or used that object. I remember how those were everyday things to me when I was growing up. Simple little things taken for granted. 

 One popped up yesterday and I was amused. It was a bumper jack. Having used one on more than one occasion, and being taught its' use in drivers' ed class, I did smile. Heck cars today don't have bumpers that would stand up to that use. I don't know the year but when the bumpers had to be redesigned to absorb a five mile an hour crash, like that's a crash, that was the end of the bumper jack. I've seen them on e-bay advertised as vintage, with prices as high as sixty dollars. I guess if you were a true collector and had to have the correct bumper jack that came with the car, but not me. I have used those old jacks as a method to pull a fence post. They can do a variety of jobs. But anyway, I was amused for a few minutes. Nothing wrong with a distraction, well unless you're driving or the wife is talking to you. Then you had better be paying attention. 

 This morning the wife is on her Chromebook and asks me about Romper Stompers. Now I don't recall hearing about those before. She explained to me they were sold in toy stores and advertised on Romper Room. Well, I never watched romper room. But these romper stompers were the same thing as tying a string to cans and then walking on the cans, stomping around the yard.. The only difference is they were made of plastic. I can only imagine the warnings and caution stickers that would come with such things today! If you ever tried walking on cans you know how easily it is to twist an ankle, stumble, fall down and probably you are not getting proper arch support. I laughed about that as it is a good memory. A #10 can works best in my experience. Then I remembered another favorite toy of mine. The gun that shoots around the corner. I got that toy Christmas 1964. I was eleven years old and certainly needed a gun that was capable of shooting around the corner. I had two older brothers and I could hide around the corner and still get'em. It was a pretty cool toy. It folded in the center with a mirror attached so you could sight it in. The tip of that barrel wasn't bright orange and would be hard to see. It was years later that the barrel tips had to be orange so the police could tell if the gun was real or not. 

 Yes it is a good memory of a favorite toy. Five years later, when I was sixteen, I got a shotgun for Christmas. It was a twenty gauge, bolt action with a poly choke. Now that was cool. I fired maybe six boxes of shells through that gun at cans, bottles, trees and other inanimate objects. I got my hunting license, every boy needed a hunting license in those days, you wore it in a pouch on the back of your hunting jacket, a sort of badge of manhood. I wore mine around but only went hunting a few times. I was never much on hunting. I have no issue with those that want to hunt and eat what they kill, I don't agree with just killing something for the sport of it. It's something I learned as a kid with my first BB gun. I shot a bird with that gun and killed it. I remember walking up to the bird afterwards and feeling sad about that. The bird was dead for no reason. I didn't shot any birds after that. I did try to shoot pheasants, ducks and a racoon once. Well I'm just not much of a hunter. Seems like a lot of effort to me. I'd just as soon get a good burger from Mickey D's. 

 I expect the kids of today will have their memories of favorite toys and everyday objects gone obsolete. They will laugh and wonder how their kids don't know what something was used for. I'm thinking many may not know what a steam iron is, might be true today. But the things we take as everyday, normal, even expected today will one day be nostalgia. I grew up with guns, knives, firecrackers and all matter of dangerous stuff. The cars didn't have seat belts, air bags, or radar for crash avoidance. The truth is using a bumper jack was pretty risky business if you didn't do it correctly. They are not the most stable things to use. But we were expected to have common sense and some understanding of how things worked in the world. We didn't think about suing someone when we did something stupid. That was our fault, not theirs. Yes a saw will cut your fingers off,  and we didn't need to be told to not use an electrical device in the bathtub. That and we knew the difference between fantasy and reality. Yes I had a gun that would shoot around the corner, that was a fantasy gun. It shot rubber balls using a spring, wouldn't hurt anyone. Heck the balls were big enough they wouldn't put your eye out, a constant danger when I was a kid. But a shotgun! Now that was real. You didn't load it in the house ever, you never brought in the house loaded, ever. You didn't point it at anything you didn't intend to shoot. And my gun just sat in the closet, didn't assault anyone. It just sat there for years. Far as I know it sits in the closet still. Wish I had my gun that shoots around the corner today. Just imagine the fun I could have with that.      

Gun shy

 It's an old saying, gun shy. It probably began as a simple description of a hunting dog being startled when the gun went off. Over the years it has taken on new meaning. It can now mean a person that is nervous, scared or overly cautious. That saying came to mind as I listened to the news. Governors, Dr. Fauci and everyday citizens concerned about " reopening " the country. I'd have to say they all sounded gun shy to me. I'd also say a bit of fear mongering is going on. If we open too soon, there will be misery and death! That's what the Dr. said. The underlining message was a simple one, we should all just wait for a vaccine! It isn't going to be safe until we all comply with that agenda! Indeed, the tracking teams are being recruited and trained as I write this piece. They are calling it something else, contact tracing, but make no mistake about it, you are being tracked. Depending upon which expert you choose it is effective or ineffective. It is effective at knowing where you go that much is certain. If they are tracking your cell phone don't you think they can access that phone as well? I don't know for sure but I'm thinking the answer has to be yes.
 But setting that little tidbit aside consider this. I'm no epidemiologist, although there appears to be an abundance of those folks on Facebook, I wonder why they aren't working on the problem instead of being on Facebook, but this virus is never going to just disappear. It will always be out there, the invisible enemy ready to strike. Yes that sounds quite dramatic, I should be on the news shows. This " mitigation " has been going on since mid-march. The economic impact has been significant. In fact, it is deeply concerning to those that really understand international finance. I'm not one of those but understand you can't just give out money without anything coming in and expect to stay solvent for long. Wasn't long ago the government said they couldn't afford to give SS recipients anything greater than 2.8%. Today they are giving an additional 600 dollars a week to unemployment benefits, 1200 dollar checks to over 120 million people so far, and they want to do it again. All the while telling people, just stay home. Where is that money supposed to come from? That's the real elephant in the room and the subject they try to avoid.
 But we have closed the country for business. It could last until labor day. We won't be safe until everyone is vaccinated, tagged and bagged! That's the real agenda here. The schools are closed and not everyone has the internet or devices. That has to be rectified right away. What do you need that for? It's for the children, the usual reason for doing these things, it's for the children. If we can make sure every home has the internet, and a digital signature, it will be easier to keep track of people. Those we can't track, we will confine to their homes, or a home provided by the government. You will not be " safe " to be among the compliant population. Compliance is mandatory!
 There are some in a position of power that are calling for a return to business. They are not popular. I feel a great deal of that has to do with the reporting of the news and the response of the government. We hear the stats on those that died, but how many have recovered. We hear. millions of people have lost their jobs, the unemployment rate is higher than during the great depression.  What you don't hear is, those people didn't lose their jobs they were ordered to stay home! The unemployment rate is so high because businesses are not allowed to operate. The great depression began in 1929 with the collapse of Wall Street. What preceded that? It was the roaring twenties and the economy was booming, it was destined to fall. There were many bank loans out there, debt was mounting, and then came panic from the public in general. The big sell off of assets triggered that crash. Watching the market today can cause that same panic. What caused the panic we are seeing? A virus or was it the response to that virus? And now when the call to reopen business is made what do we hear? Better not, better wait a while, we wouldn't want to reopen too soon? Too soon for what? Do you mean before the population can be made to comply, before the population is sufficiently gun shy to just stay home!
 Yes there will be those that are happy with all of this. Some are getting more money now than when they were working. Every form of business today is becoming more " user " friendly. Insurance companies giving rebates. landlords prohibited from raising the rent or evicting you for non payment. checks from the government. internet access for all, the government providing lap tops and other devices, for the children, deferred payments on most everything. But it is those folks that either just don't know or just don't care that there will be a day of reckoning. The day comes when the bills must be paid. Then what? In 1929 a booming economy collapsed upon itself. What was the response from FDR. Social programs. Yes, that is what the response was. The CCC was formed to put people to work, Social Security came into being, It was called the new deal. Just a little bit of socialism. And now will there be another " new deal? " Just what will that look like? That all depends upon one thing doesn't it? This is no time to be Gun Shy! What brought down the economy this time? A virus, a fear, experts preaching gloom and doom. Or was it opportunity? An opportunity being exploited to establish a " new deal? " A new socialism? Trust us, just stay home.
 I offer all of this simply as something to give thought too. I don't believe this virus was manufactured and released to the public as any international plot. I am saying there are those that will exploit any perceived advantage they can to further there political ideals. There is far more going on here than is being told. Trump, among others call this a war. Indeed it could very well be a form of warfare. Politics is warfare. This is quickly developing into a struggle between two factions. The one side saying, get back to work and the other just wanting to stay home. It was the same way during the revolution. Yeah, some said just pay the tax. They were a bit gun shy. But thankfully there were those that knew better, that took a stand. Yeah it was going to come at a cost, freedom always does. The cost was a terrible one. It was worth it though.        

Being Candid

 It was a question on Facebook. What do you think has changed the most in America? I paraphrased that question a bit but that is what I thought was being asked. I'm going out on a limb there as I realize that today it should be a direct quote, cross-referenced with links provided to verify the validity of the quote. Yes, today you had better be prepared to provide references and substantive evidence. But I will continue on. It is my thinking that what has changed the most is what I would call, emotional fragility. " You could call it acting like a bunch of big babies and that wouldn't be far off the mark. I do question when people are going to just grow up and act like adults! You have to admit you do hear a lot of rhetoric about being empowered, about acceptance, inclusiveness and empathy. You hear so much of that it is making entire generations emotional cripples! That's the way I see it. I know, I know, I'm just an old man without feelings, whatever. But it is time to put on our big boy pants and put an end to this nonsense. Oh poor me, it's not fair. Life ain't fair, never has been, never will be. Get over it.

 There is right and wrong. Yes, I know some today can't quite grasp that concept, they feel triggered. It isn't fair. When we were nothing more than colonies of Great Britain and under her rule there came a point when we said, it isn't fair! Yes that was the big gripe wasn't it? Taxation without representation is tyranny. We were all taught that in school, at least when I was in grade school we were. We, the colonies, decided it just wasn't fair or right. The result was a Declaration. The need existed to declare out intentions. Now most of us know the opening sentences and perhaps a few bits and pieces of that famous document. There is a line in there that I would apply to today just as readily: " To prove this, let facts be submitted to a candid world. " That's where emotional fragility comes into the picture. What were they saying? Candid; truthful, straightforward and frank is what candid means and what their intentions were when listing all the offenses the king had committed against the colonies. Those signers put their lives on the line in doing so. Five of them where captured by the British and imprisoned as traitors. Others that enjoyed great wealth died penniless. But these men felt compelled to tell the truth and sign their names to that truth. They even began with that very statement. " We hold these truths to be self evident. " Candid, it certainly was and it is time we were candid once again.

 I could list all the things I feel are wrong but I'm not going to do that. I am going to ask you to take a candid look at current legislation and proposed legislative measures. Undocumented immigrants, illegal aliens, dreamers, whatever term you wish to apply are being granted the same rights as citizens. Is that fair? But set that aside for a moment. What of this proposal that everyone get money every month during this crisis. Of course no one is saying how long the crisis will  last, or what is the determining factor in its' length. No, instead we hear about stages and phases. The government has already distributed trillions of dollars in tax payers money. Yes, trillions of your money if you are a tax payer. How much was distributed to those that aren't citizens, never paid taxes, were already collecting government assistance ( welfare ) and those that really didn't need it at all? Yes, I know there was a cut-off at 75, 000 dollars adjusted gross income. I even mentioned it about myself, I haven't received any money yet, but being on a fixed income this corvid virus stuff hasn't effected my income at all. I'm certain this true for thousands, if not millions of others. Yet, we are all included and there is talk of giving out more. Additional funds have been provided for those that are collecting unemployment. So much so it has incentivized some workers to want to just stay that way! There are getting more money by not working! 

 Well I guess I wandered off a bit. What I am saying is, it is time for some candid talk! I don't care if your feelings are hurt, if you feel minimized. or any of that. No, time to grow up and make those tough choices that adults have to make. Sometimes those decisions can cost us. The signers of the Declaration were aware of that, acutely aware. It was written in the document itself. " We mutually pledge to each other our lives, our fortunes, and our scared honor. " That is what it says. They also pointed out they relied upon the " protection of divine providence " in this endeavor. That's right, they relied upon God, to have their back. For God and Country isn't some catch phrase. Yes it is past time we all had a candid discussion about all of this! First however we must regain our emotional fortitude. That's what is lacking today. That's why I say that is what has changed the most, too many people just giving the answer others want to hear instead of  telling the truth. Wouldn't want to hurt anyone's feelings or God forbid, trigger them. Funny how it was decided we could practice social distancing at Walmart and the Liquor store, but not at the Church. Guess those going to those places are far more concerned, far more Christian in their approach to others than those going to church. The founding fathers felt it imperative to include the " protection of divine providence " and now we are being told, " just stay home. " Well unless you need something from Walmart or another bottle of booze. 

Boomer

 It is something I haven't heard lately, ok boomer. It's a phrase of derision. I hate to admit it because I am a boomer, but for many, it is deserved. My thinking is, and always has been, they are the ones that were the hippies, or at least wanna be hippies. They were " dropping out " in the sixties, protesting Vietnam, expanding their minds with mushrooms and acid. Yeah but they were cool, hip, far out man. I was at odds with that bunch then and remain at odds with that whole scene. Apparently those " boomers " haven't learned much over the years. Consider this; these folks started to drop out and form communes. ( socialism ) It was all cool with the free love, great music. and the " man " wasn't hassling them. Worked well until they discovered some people didn't work at all but still ate the food. Then they discovered they didn't have any money either, bummer man. And all that free love, well it just turned out to be a hassle man, turns out a family is the best way after all. And so the communes slowly disappeared and everyone went home. For others the commune turned into a cult, and that all turned out to be a bad scene man. Like wow man, the whole commune thing just doesn't work! Like wow, could it be that commune and communism are like, well, the same thing? Well peace and love , keep on truckin'.
 I'm writing about the boomers this morning because it is my thinking we boomers had better wake up. The party is over folks! It is our generation that has allowed a lot of this to happen. Indeed, we are responsible for a great number of the social ills of today. Remember all those things our parents tried to teach us but we just laughed? I say we because I'm guilty too. Our parents caught the tail end of the great depression. Many served in WW2 and Korea. They returned to a prosperous nation, the greatest nation on earth. They were the greatest generation after all. And many of us rejected all of that, dismissed it as being " square. " Our parents indulged us, wanting better for their children as all parents do. Some adopted the modern thinking, the space age way of doing things. In 1946 Dr. Spock wrote his baby book. New Moms flocked to read it and follow his advice. It really changed the way children were being raised. In all he wrote eleven books. He was a big proponent of Freud and his philosophy. In fact he changed Freuds words so as not to offend readers when explaining why children acted in certain ways. In many ways that undermined the traditional way children had been raised. Yes, it was new age thinking for sure.
 We boomers are nearing the end of our political effectiveness. Are numbers are diminishing, no doubt about that. As we age the push is on, place us all in a home. Think about what is really being said there. Placed in a home that isn't a home at all but merely a care faculty, one operated solely for profit. But we are told it is for our own good, it's the very best care. Sure it is. And today listen to the news, the greatest number of people dying from this virus are where? In a nursing home. Listen to the ads on television, if you are over sixty it's time for " senior " care. You need prevagen to improve your memory, a scooter, a walker, a step in bath tub, right height toilet included free, incontinence supplies delivered discreetly to your door, life insurance to take care of those final expenses and the commercials drone on. But we still have time to be politically active. We need to grow up and vote for common sense, accountability and reason! Yes, all those things our parents told us about. You know when they said you had to buckle down, get a job and make something of yourself. When they told us about hard work, ethics and having moral values. They preached to us about God and Country and your obligation to both.
 All I hear today is stay alive. Living isn't so important as long as you are alive. That's why we are shipped off to nursing homes, now called care facilities as though anyone really cares. Oh I suppose those working there have empathy otherwise they wouldn't work there. But I see it as not much different from rescuing animals. Yeah just 63 cents a day and the old people can be saved! The cost is significantly higher but you get my drift. But I say we boomers still have time to make a difference, return the country to the proper road. All we have to do is act like adults and make the tough choices. Do not allow freedom to be surrendered! Not on my watch. Remember the lessons of our parents, some are still with us. Listen to them now if you didn't then. Yes I've been called old, boomer and any number of things. Crazy old man. Oh I haven't been perfect, but I have been listening all these years. And you know what? Our parents were right for the most part. You do have to do what needs to be done, whether you like it or not. Buck Up! We can still teach these kids a thing or two.
 People sometimes have last messages engraved on their tombstones. I wouldn't mind if mine said, I'm dead, I'm not surprised by it, knew it would happen one day, Boom. I am a boomer.