It's my thinking the hardest person to please should be yourself. That seems to be at odds with what I constantly hear. Well I realize that others are trying to get me to buy something. It doesn't matter if it is a product, a service, or merely an idea. The goal for them is to get me to buy into whatever they are selling. I suppose the same could be said for myself, I'm not much different from anyone else. I would like you to buy into what I'm saying, no one enjoys disagreement or being told they are wrong. But the real struggle is to convince yourself. That's why I say the hardest person to please should be yourself. Of course the real issue with that is validation. How do you measure success? Is it fame and fortune? Or is it merely a sense of contentment with what you are doing? Are you pleased with the result? Yesterday I wrote, " when your thoughts require validation, think again. " What I was thinking about was being content. That you have decided. If you are thinking about it and waiting for someone else to validate that thought, you surely haven't decided.
I hear an awful lot about being empowered these days. It has become a catch phrase. I feel empowered, he is empowered, you can be empowered. Just what does that mean? The dictionary says it means to give someone the authority or power to do something; it can also mean make someone stronger and more confident. The issue I have with that is in order to become empowered you have to surrender your own power. Empowerment comes from an outside source. Allowing others to control your happiness, your desire, or motivation is creating a dependency. What happens when that " empowerment " is no longer given? When you no longer receive your fix? It's a subtle difference, but empowerment is not the same as encouragement. I'm all for encouraging others to do their best at whatever they choose to do. I will provide support, help them if I can. But the thing is, they shouldn't be dependent upon that.
There are many articles, essays and therapies for those that are their own worst critics. In fact it is considered a flaw. One of the " flaws " according to some experts is that you are listening to the voice between your ears. Yes, that's what some say. They want you to listen to them. I'm thinking I should be listening, as I am the only one that can hear them! It can't be a good thing to ignore that and just listen to what others are telling me. No the majority of the time others are thinking about their own experiences. The reason is simple enough, they haven't experienced mine. All things being equal, doesn't mean all things are equal.
I notice the subtleties in the choice of words. It happens over time. It is what leads to discussion and sometimes to disagreement. What do the words mean? Words are meant to express our thoughts and feelings. That is the reason for such a tremendous variety of words in the first place. I often find myself struggling to find just the right word. Yes I could go to the thesaurus and search one out but will the reader understand it? Now I have a fairly good vocabulary, but there are thousands of words I've never heard of or used. It can also come off as pretentious if you start inserting hundred cdollar words in your writing. I will go to the dictionary when I don't understand the word but that is tiresome if I have to do that too often. When I'm reading I hear a story in my head and I don't like it interrupted. I'm thinking others feel the same way. I notice the subtle difference between empowered and encouraged. I am grateful for any encouragement I receive, but I am not dependent upon that. To feel empowered comes with a subtle implication that I was given permission, or validated by another, to feel the way I do. That could be withdrawn at any moment. Encouragement is a gift not a dependence. Subtle, yes it is.
Another word that I hear all the time is judge or judgement. Today it is something that you are told not to do. I know, I hear it frequently, don't judge. But just what is judgement? Let's go to the dictionary. It says; the ability to make considered, or come to sensible conclusions, an opinion or conclusion, punishment from a divine source. So when I hear people saying don't judge, I'm hearing them say, don't make a considered, sensible or common sense conclusion. What they really mean to say is, I disagree with your judgement and it is wrong of you to make that judgement. They say that before they even hear your judgement! It's an amazing thing really. Why is that? It's because they want to change the " judgement " to align with their own feelings. The common sense, considered and logical judgement is not what they want to hear. Fact is, it isn't judgement they want to avoid, it is the adjudication that troubles them. What is adjudication? The evaluation of the evidence. Subtle but powerful nonetheless.
Well I'm not sure how I arrived at this conclusion. I began with one thought and ended on another. It happens to me all the time. I suppose I just haven't decided yet. I'm not real pleased with the outcome. Still these are my thoughts, freely shared with anyone that cares to take an interest." My thoughts do not require validation as they are my own, and when I choose to share them, they remain the same. " Well, until I decide to change them anyway. And that's a decision in itself. Self powered, not empowered. In short, I don't need anyone's permission. Hey now, that, that is empowering! LOL
I hear an awful lot about being empowered these days. It has become a catch phrase. I feel empowered, he is empowered, you can be empowered. Just what does that mean? The dictionary says it means to give someone the authority or power to do something; it can also mean make someone stronger and more confident. The issue I have with that is in order to become empowered you have to surrender your own power. Empowerment comes from an outside source. Allowing others to control your happiness, your desire, or motivation is creating a dependency. What happens when that " empowerment " is no longer given? When you no longer receive your fix? It's a subtle difference, but empowerment is not the same as encouragement. I'm all for encouraging others to do their best at whatever they choose to do. I will provide support, help them if I can. But the thing is, they shouldn't be dependent upon that.
There are many articles, essays and therapies for those that are their own worst critics. In fact it is considered a flaw. One of the " flaws " according to some experts is that you are listening to the voice between your ears. Yes, that's what some say. They want you to listen to them. I'm thinking I should be listening, as I am the only one that can hear them! It can't be a good thing to ignore that and just listen to what others are telling me. No the majority of the time others are thinking about their own experiences. The reason is simple enough, they haven't experienced mine. All things being equal, doesn't mean all things are equal.
I notice the subtleties in the choice of words. It happens over time. It is what leads to discussion and sometimes to disagreement. What do the words mean? Words are meant to express our thoughts and feelings. That is the reason for such a tremendous variety of words in the first place. I often find myself struggling to find just the right word. Yes I could go to the thesaurus and search one out but will the reader understand it? Now I have a fairly good vocabulary, but there are thousands of words I've never heard of or used. It can also come off as pretentious if you start inserting hundred cdollar words in your writing. I will go to the dictionary when I don't understand the word but that is tiresome if I have to do that too often. When I'm reading I hear a story in my head and I don't like it interrupted. I'm thinking others feel the same way. I notice the subtle difference between empowered and encouraged. I am grateful for any encouragement I receive, but I am not dependent upon that. To feel empowered comes with a subtle implication that I was given permission, or validated by another, to feel the way I do. That could be withdrawn at any moment. Encouragement is a gift not a dependence. Subtle, yes it is.
Another word that I hear all the time is judge or judgement. Today it is something that you are told not to do. I know, I hear it frequently, don't judge. But just what is judgement? Let's go to the dictionary. It says; the ability to make considered, or come to sensible conclusions, an opinion or conclusion, punishment from a divine source. So when I hear people saying don't judge, I'm hearing them say, don't make a considered, sensible or common sense conclusion. What they really mean to say is, I disagree with your judgement and it is wrong of you to make that judgement. They say that before they even hear your judgement! It's an amazing thing really. Why is that? It's because they want to change the " judgement " to align with their own feelings. The common sense, considered and logical judgement is not what they want to hear. Fact is, it isn't judgement they want to avoid, it is the adjudication that troubles them. What is adjudication? The evaluation of the evidence. Subtle but powerful nonetheless.
Well I'm not sure how I arrived at this conclusion. I began with one thought and ended on another. It happens to me all the time. I suppose I just haven't decided yet. I'm not real pleased with the outcome. Still these are my thoughts, freely shared with anyone that cares to take an interest." My thoughts do not require validation as they are my own, and when I choose to share them, they remain the same. " Well, until I decide to change them anyway. And that's a decision in itself. Self powered, not empowered. In short, I don't need anyone's permission. Hey now, that, that is empowering! LOL
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