I don't shop a lot and when I do it is usually in and out. I know what I want or need, and get it and gone. The other day I had occasion to be at the local Walmart. I was with my Granddaughter and she needed some lip gloss. These young girls are always wanting some sort of maintenance product, even at age ten. In my quest to find that I stumbled upon something amazing. Right there in a little alcove was a medical center ! It was a booth like affair. You sit in there and put your arm in a cuff and it measures your blood pressure. It will weigh you and give you your body mass index. It will even test your vision ! And it is all free ! Well, I just stopped right there and got my free check up. Who needs Obamacare, I've got Walmart. All I had to do was enter some pertinent information about myself. Height and age and that was about all it needed. I liked that it didn't ask a bunch of embarrassing questions about the past or anything. No sir, it was just in and out.
I got out of that checkup feeling pretty good. My blood pressure was fine and I'm not fat. My vision isn't too great but I already knew that, been wearing glasses since the third grade. Good thing was though, if I needed new glasses they had a whole rack of them right there. And they were only ten bucks a pair. There is a sticker on the lens telling you the strength. No problem. No waiting for a fitting or waiting to be made,just grab and go. Man this is great.
After getting done with that I was feeling a little tired but they had that covered too. I see this big display of five hour energy. Apparently all I have to do is drink one ounce of this energy stuff and I will be good for another five hours ! Modern science at work. Ok, so now I'm awake but my feet hurt. Not a problem, Walmart has got me covered. Right there is another medical device, this one will fit me for custom fit orthopedic insoles ! Just stand right here and the machine does the calculations. Bam, just like that. The proper ones are right there conveniently located. Slip them babies into your shoes and you are good to go !
Down another aisle and more miracles await. Teeth whitening, hair growing and age spot removal. It is a one stop medical facility, who knew ?
Having discovered this I now don't understand the fuss about health care in America. It was all free, right there at the Walmart. Got a checkup and all the medical devices I needed, plus a lot more energy. They sell that five hour stuff in six packs too !
When I got home I just cancelled that appointment at the doctors office. It obviously isn't necessary. My feet don't hurt, I'm full of energy and can see just fine. Now for a little teeth whitening and I got some rub on Tan. As soon as the hair on my head grows back, lush and full as promised on the box, I'll be going back to Walmart. I'm going to need a new wardrobe to go with my new image. And I know that Walmart has got me covered.
I got out of that checkup feeling pretty good. My blood pressure was fine and I'm not fat. My vision isn't too great but I already knew that, been wearing glasses since the third grade. Good thing was though, if I needed new glasses they had a whole rack of them right there. And they were only ten bucks a pair. There is a sticker on the lens telling you the strength. No problem. No waiting for a fitting or waiting to be made,just grab and go. Man this is great.
After getting done with that I was feeling a little tired but they had that covered too. I see this big display of five hour energy. Apparently all I have to do is drink one ounce of this energy stuff and I will be good for another five hours ! Modern science at work. Ok, so now I'm awake but my feet hurt. Not a problem, Walmart has got me covered. Right there is another medical device, this one will fit me for custom fit orthopedic insoles ! Just stand right here and the machine does the calculations. Bam, just like that. The proper ones are right there conveniently located. Slip them babies into your shoes and you are good to go !
Down another aisle and more miracles await. Teeth whitening, hair growing and age spot removal. It is a one stop medical facility, who knew ?
Having discovered this I now don't understand the fuss about health care in America. It was all free, right there at the Walmart. Got a checkup and all the medical devices I needed, plus a lot more energy. They sell that five hour stuff in six packs too !
When I got home I just cancelled that appointment at the doctors office. It obviously isn't necessary. My feet don't hurt, I'm full of energy and can see just fine. Now for a little teeth whitening and I got some rub on Tan. As soon as the hair on my head grows back, lush and full as promised on the box, I'll be going back to Walmart. I'm going to need a new wardrobe to go with my new image. And I know that Walmart has got me covered.
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