Sunday, November 9, 2014

Avenues of Acceptance

I was talking with my grandson when he told me about some of his classmates. He was telling me how some like to curse. He said he asked one of them why and he told him because everyone else does. I said, Mark, that is one avenue to acceptance but not one I agree with. He agreed that it was a quick way to fit in and be part of the group, but didn't agree with it either. We talked a little more and he was telling me a lesson from a movie he had watched. God isn't dead, I believe is the name of it. I have not seen it. Evidently it made a positive impression upon him. Having not seen the movie, the story he tried to tell me was difficult to understand, but that wasn't important anyway. What was important was having the discussion. I think the best discussions we have with our children and grandchildren are the ones that are spontaneous. Also the ones that only last a few minutes. Just talking is best.
Mark did tell me about taking the same path as everyone else. How doing that was a lot easier and more comfortable. He also said it was more dangerous. there are a lot of places one can go on that path and not all of them good. I think that was the lesson from that movie that we was trying to explain. I told him I would rather travel with just a few close friends, friends that I could trust, than travel on a crowded highway. There are many avenues to acceptance and not all are crowded. I did tell him that you can travel the same highway as everyone else, but you don't have to make the same stops ! That is pretty much where that discussion ended and we began to talk about soccer.
It was after talking with Mark about this that I began to think as well. What avenues of acceptance had I chosen ? I would say I have traveled many. I have made many stops along the way and not all were good. I was fortunate that in my youth, growing up where I did, I was given a certain amount of freedom. And that freedom extended to being who you were. There were people in that town that were what some would call " different " but we just called them "characters." As in, he's some character, ain't he ? On the surface one might think that was a bad thing, but it wasn't. That was a lesson I learned. It was alright to be different. I would say our " avenue of acceptance " was a broad street indeed. I was taught, by example, that many types of people walked the street and they were just as entitled to do that as I. It also didn't mean I had to make the same stops. But being a curious fellow by nature ,I have made most of them. I have spent the majority of my life unaware of that. I think that is the way it is with most of us. There does come a time of an awakening or realization, whatever term you like to use. I became aware of that lesson. The " avenue of acceptance " is not a narrow path but rather a broad street, yes an avenue. You can walk the avenue with everyone else but that doesn't mean you have to frequent the same stops as they do ! That is to say, in modern parlance, "you don't have go there. " It also means you must accept the fact that others do. It is the later that takes a while to understand. Sometimes we must walk alone on the avenue. Walking alone doesn't indicate you are correct, but that you are considerate. It is only when we try to drag others into our stops that issues arise. Then we become an imposition. Are there times when we should ? Absolutely.
To just follow the crowd is the easier way, to be sure. Just as Mark said, it is a more comfortable route. To just allow others, especially those you love, to just enter those " bad stops " along the way isn't being much of a friend. That's not what friends are for. That's what the crowd is for. Finding our own path through the crowd is a difficult thing and requires help at times. That's what friends are for. Friends don't always listen, but always hear. What you need are those that stay on the avenue with you. Some will stop and never return, for others it is just a delay. The thing to remember is, do not judge people by the stops they make, but rather by the path they walk. The ones that return are your friends, all the others are just travelers. Mark eluded to this statement," in the end we will all face a stairway, the stairs go either up or down", the path you chose decides which stairway you get. Perhaps that is from that movie, I don't know, but it is a truth. I would say this, the stairs going up or down may be heaven and hell, but may be happiness or sorrow as well. Choose your path on the avenue wisely. It is a big world out there. There are many " avenues to acceptance " but it is the path you follow that counts. If you find yourself going up and down stairs a lot, especially down, you may what to reevaluate the path you are on. I'm not saying leave the avenue, just adjust your path.




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