Words in Rhyme

Lingering reflections in my mind, pictures of a place and time. A place I was and should have been,a place I will go again.
Occasionally entire lines come to me. These two just appeared and I wrote them down. Two lines of poetry ? Why not ? Images can be painted with just a few brushstrokes, so too our words. The words we speak or write should inspire thought. These words led me to think that our memories are like reflections in a mirror. We believe we know what to expect, but are sometimes surprised. Sometimes the reflection isn't what we thought at all. Is it perception, or reality ? The two things may be entirely different. That is why we get surprised. But why should we be surprised by what is real ? Is it because our mind wants to remember something else ?
Reflections in a mirror can be distorted. This also true with the reflections in our minds. The rose colored glasses effect one might say. As a whole we do tend to remember the past with a deep fondness. Label it nostalgia if you will, but it is a lingering reflection, albeit distorted over time. I see my past through the eyes of the future. It is what I see  today that matters. Where I was in the past, whether by design or circumstance is of little consequence. It is the place I should have been. It is the past that forms our future. Past actions influencing current reactions. We may not see that all the time but it is true nonetheless. It is also true we are fated to repeat certain actions and reactions. And so, a place I will go again.
Perhaps more lines of thought will come to me. I never know when it will happen. Are these lines incomplete thoughts ? Today I do not think that they are. I think they are just what I was thinking. I hope they make you think as well.

Memories Lost ?

Where do old memories go ? I spend a lot of time writing my memories down in the hopes they are preserved. Perhaps they will be of interest in future years, a curiosity. I can not know the fate of them. And it is with that thought that I do wonder, where do old memories go ? Surely those memories live, lost in time, for time is endless. Those old memories must just wander about and make an occasional appearance. Are they the wisdom of the ages ? We hear about that and I wonder where did that wisdom come from ? It must be lost memories, floating in time and space, rediscovered again and again. It is that reasoning that has lead me to say, there is little new one can say, only a rephrasing of the old. Memories and wisdom as old as the ages. Memory is the life force of the spirit. Memory keeps things alive.
Our memories are a unique gift we receive from our God. No one else has our memory. Even those we shared our lives and times with do not share that. If you don't believe that, ask your brother or your sister about events of the past, you will quickly learn. Similar events often form different memories. Memory is also tied to belief. The more you trust your memory, the stronger will be your belief. Doubts cause disbelief. Perhaps that is what causes restless spirits, doubting your own memory. In that doubt, belief is also lost. Then, having lost belief, there is no where for the spirit to go and it wanders.
I do believe each of us must contribute. It is our obligation. But what is our lasting contribution ? What can we offer to the future ? Our time here is but a moment. The only lasting thing is memory. Material objects will disintegrate over time or be lost. Wealth will dwindle and be gone. In time, even the conscious memory of us will fade away. Future generations may know our name and recognize our picture but little else. Our memories however, surely linger on. That is a thought I cling to. Call it vanity or pride if you will, but I must believe in that. To dismiss your life, your memories, would mean those memories are insignificant to the future. I can not believe I only live for today. There is far too much to learn to draw that conclusion. I have far too many unanswered questions. I also hear a lot of advice from the past. Are they memories lost ? Bits of wisdom from the ages ? Memory speaks to us. Is it only our memory that we hear ? Not, I think , if we listen closely enough. There are others. Memory retells the story. The story may change, but not the memory. How can that be ? Maybe it is old memories mixed with the new. Maybe that is where old memories go, to the new. In that way they continue on. 

Get the gift

I woke up and the first thing I heard was Frosty the Snowman. Ah, tis the season. Time is indeed rushing forward. Twenty six days until Christmas day.The grandchildren are past the age of Santa Claus. That is a sad thing in a way. I find myself looking at the small toys and clothes for the younger crowd and wishing I had some. Little ones that is. Not much can compare to that excitement Christmas morning with little kids. Even then, it never lasts long, but for a little while it is magic.
In years past I have hesitated to put up the decorations and the tree. I felt like things was being rushed to much. For some reason I can't explain, this year feels different. I'm anxious. The very first thing going up this year is going to be the Nativity scene. I have the stable that I built with my grandson and the figurines. It seems fitting that it should start there. I'm getting caught up in the spirit. I will not allow Black Friday to encroach upon my holiday. I'm just ignoring it.
It is time for those end of the year cards. That tradition didn't catch on all that well. I had an aunt that used to send one. It was a fine idea but for the majority of us there wasn't enough material to make it worth the effort. Just a few large news interests occur in an average year, the rest is filled with the minusicha of living. The details are not of much interest to others. I see suggestions on social media for other things to do that sound interesting. One is to use an empty pickle jar and place thankful notes in it throughout the year. Then, at Thanksgiving the following year you can review them. Sounds like fun but it requires commitment. Probably not going to happen.
Something I have noticed is, yesterday seems so far away, while tomorrow is rushing at me. When I was younger the opposite was true. Have I gone beyond a halfway point here ? Is there some invisible barrier that separates the past and future ? Einstein and his theory of relativity must come into play somewhere. I wonder if he felt the same way ? He seemed to become aware of that at an early age and became fascinated with it. Probably wouldn't have happened if he had a Playstation though. Just a thought. If yesterday was so great, and we loved it so much, why do we get sad thinking about it ? Because it is gone is the obvious answer. But is it really gone ? I say no it isn't. As long as we remember we can enjoy. Just as those that we love are never really gone as long as we speak their name, so too can we enjoy the past. It is a blessing to have good memories. In fact it is one of the mercies of life. We do tend to remember the good and discard the bad. We get to choose. And for me I intend to make my memories an enjoyable journey. Those happy times can not be taken from me ! They are not lost.
The Christmas season. Not an ending, but a beginning. With that gift the future is bright. We should not look back into the darkness of what was, but look forward to what will be. The promise of Christmas is all about that. Nothing to be sad about. The greatest gift has already been given, all that remains is for us to receive. 

Remaining Thankful

Today is Thanksgiving day. We all know what that means and what is expected. A whole bunch of food and family. In modern jargon, it's all good. It is a wonderful tradition. No matter the real story behind it all, or the modern day naysayers bemoaning the fate of the natives, history has a way of rewriting itself. The word of the the day is Thankful. This is a day to give thanks. A day to offer our supplications to our creator. That was the original intent and has been expanded to include everyone. Nothing wrong with that, we all need reminders.
I am surprised that the politically correct and  non believers in this country have not started to complain. After all, it is a tradition based on Christian values. Thanksgiving day was to honor God ! It was one method of educating the natives to European thoughts on religion. I'm sure it was also a celebration of having survived by the Pilgrims. I know, they weren't really Pilgrims, never mind about that. What is of importance was the intet. I do think that intent and meaning is slowly being lost. Thanksgiving is shifting to the day before Black Friday more than anything else. It has been a number of years now that the major retailers do business on this day. As few as twenty years ago that would have been unheard of. Public opinion would have destroyed that idea. It is a shift in social conscience. It began with Sunday. The day the Lord himself rested and the disrespecting of that day has been spreading to others ever since. God removed from the social conscience. And we wonder what is happening in America ? Coincidence or chance ? Well, we are each entitled to our beliefs.
For me today is a day to thank the Lord. To thank him and all that he has created. That encompasses everything. It is a celebration. We should celebrate with our fellow man that God has allowed us another year. We should be grateful for his mercy. Just as Jesus broke bread with his disciples we should symbolically break bread with our fellow man. A mutual communion. Expressing our gratitude and good fortune. That first Thanksgiving when the Pilgrims shared their gratitude with the natives could be looked at as the first time this nation came together. The europeans and the natives on one soil. What has transpired since that first celebration can be analyzed and judged in many fashions indeed. Irregardless, we should be thankful. We could not have survived that first winter or year if not for a merciful God. It was his will. Everything that happened afterwards may not be necessarily what he wanted but he also gave us free will. The question is , have we remained thankful ?

All about the Jingle

All I hear about is black Friday. Well, not just black Friday, but Thursday, small business Saturday and Cyber Monday. The quest being how far can we stretch the spending binge ? As long as you are " saving " money it is acceptable to go into debt or spend more than you can afford. That seems to be the message. The primary message being how happy you will make others by giving expensive gifts, cheap ! Now there is a holiday concept even Scrooge would agree with. Yes, even as we hear the outcries of raising the minimum wage so we can survive, the louder voices say spend,spend,spend ! I may not be able to feed my family or afford health care but I can get a 75" flat screen television for a bargain ! If I don't work I can camp out in front of Walmart for two weeks and wait for the bargains ! Or, I can sleep in and save thousands of dollars by buying a new car for Christmas ! Tis the season of saving.
I don't know but this year this seems to be more of an annoyance than past years. Maybe it is just that I am getting older. Maybe it is because of current events. Whatever the cause, it is bothering me. Is stuff that important ? I mean it just appears that we as a society are becoming so self centered and needy. We will not show five minutes of patience for an elderly person in the checkout line, but would sit for a week to save a hundred dollars. All of this consumerism. All these sales are just smoke screens and mirrors. If they can afford to sell these products at these prices now, they could do so at anytime. I refuse to believe they are losing money on these products. I hear much talk in opposition to corporate America. Walmart and the big retailers treating their workers unfairly. The same people complaining about those retailers are lined up outside the doors ! Just how hypocritical is that ?
Well, it is a real shame but there is little one can do. Trying to change an attitude is a very difficult proposition. We all know the meaning of Christmas and that it has slowly been replaced by gifts. The amount of gift giving has become proportional to the " joy " of the season. That is the message corporate America has been projecting forever. Yet, even as we know that, we continue. Why are we so afraid that those we love would abandon us if we don't give them stuff ? Why do we feel the need to prove that ? As Sheldon Cooper of the big band theory would say, it is the social convention. Isn't that the truth of it ? It is what is expected. And sadly, we all want stuff. That is true of all of us. Ideally, we would not care an iota about this manufactured social custom of gift exchanging. That is however an ideal and one that does not exist. We are humans. But maybe we could begin to scale it back just a little bit. There are those in society that want to abandon God and remove his presence from our society. What is Christmas ? Remove that and why give gifts ? Those protesting God don't want to hear that part of it though. Noooo, let the Black Friday shopping continue ! Bargains,bargains,bargains. Hypocrites ! Yeah, it is all about the Jingle !! And I don't mean Santa Claus.

Lowering the bar

I saw on the news that the president awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom to nineteen people yesterday. It is our nation's highest civilian honor. Congrats to the recipients. That much being said I would add this thought, how prestigious can it be if nineteen are awarded at once ? Look, I'm just sayin'. Do these people actually qualify for the award ? As with any award, the requirements to qualify are rather subjective. I'm just not impressed with an award that seems to be handed out in a rather liberal fashion. The star loses it's luster if handed too often, know what I mean ? This seems to be a trend. I see the same thing with the awarding of other, once prestigious, medals and awards.
I am not saying anyone is not deserving of recognition. That is not my point here. I just feel like the standards are being lowered. In our haste to to " honor " or " recognize " we are devaluing the gesture. Great value is placed upon those items that are rare. The proliferation of awards can have no other effect than the opposite of the intent. Like in grade school, if every student gets a star what does it mean ? Are we so busy recognizing and praising that we are not judging the merits of the award in the light that they were intended ?
It appears to me that in recent years we have elevated the expected to the meritorious. What was once considered the normal and expected response has become extraordinary ? Why is that ? It is a question I have thought about. The massaging of our collective ego's appears to have taken precedence over common sense. It is tied up with all this political correctness nonsense. Any voice in opposition  is met with scorn and disdain. It falls back to basic moral behavior. Not so many years back we expected certain behaviors,even demanded them. Now it would seem that is not the case. Each action must be praised. In my opinion this is leading to frailty. Self assuredness is being lost. Confidence is becoming dependant upon recognition. All too often I feel it is unwarranted. A lowering of the bar is not an elevation in accomplishment. Where are our children to look for heroes ? If the majority receive the awards and accolades how can they measure a " heroic " action. Heroes stand alone ! They do not come in crowds.

A new day

Today is a continuation of yesterday. I believe we often think in those terms, but we should not. Each day is new and an opportunity. This isn't a new concept by any means, but one worth reviewing. The last few weeks have served as a reminder to myself about just that. What is in the past, has past and may be visited but never recreated. Today, right now, is the time for creation. It is what we do at this very moment that creates the day. The materials we choose to build with are certainly drawn from yesterdays' experiences, but what we build is new. Some label that process growth. We tend to think of growth as an extension of something already in existence. What of new growth ? Does growth have to stem from the old ? Yes, in a fashion I suppose it does. There is little new in the world, only old things rearranged. Whether the " new " arrangement is beneficial or not is often up for debate. This is true with ourselves as well as material things. We can rearrange ourselves if we choose to do so. The only real question being, should we ?
In order to answer that question we need ask another. Just where does the obligation lie ? Are we obligated to only ourselves or to the universe as a whole ? It would seem that is the only two reasonable choices one could have. Either I feel it is I, alone in the universe as a single entity battling the forces and making my way through a random existence, forming alliances and attempting to gain: what ? That is the problem with the I scenario. What is my purpose in being here ? A random function ? Doesn't make much sense does it ? The other choice is an obligation to the universe as a whole. The universe created me. I call my creator God, but you may have a different name, makes no difference. The concept is exactly the same. I was created and being created I have a purpose, a function. If not, I wouldn't have been created in the first place. Each birth is a miracle, and miracles don't happen by accident. They are not random occurrences any more than the creation of the universe just happened ! So, for me the question is answered, I am obligated to the universe. I am obligated to a higher power than myself.
As to whether I should rebuild or recreate myself, rearrange the pieces as it were, the answer would have to be yes. No one of us are perfect in every way. Vigilance is the key to happiness. To live in harmony with the universe is the goal. Edison said to repeat the same action and expect different results is insanity. Hard to argue with a genius. It is the results that are of importance. If there is unrest in your life that is an indicator. Define the cause of that unrest. If the unrest is caused by others, there is little you can do to alter that. If the unrest is caused by your own actions, that is what you control. A simple concept most difficult to execute. Each moment offers us a chance. That doesn't mean you have to take it, just consider the choices. I don't believe anyones' function is to create disfunction. So if what you are doing is creating that, that may require some further evaluation.
I have wandered off the topic I started with. I often take these little strolls and find them refreshing. Sometimes all you have to do is repeat the things you have already learned to gain new insight. That is the layers thing I have read about. The depth of thought some call it, others call it understanding. Me, I call it ramblin'. Thing is, when you ramble and roam you never know where you will end up. It is always a surprise and I like surprises. Today is a new day.
Luke 1:78 A new day will dawn on us from above because our God is loving and merciful. 

Feeling alright

Recent events have given me pause. They have caused me to to stop and look around. That can be an uncomfortable thing at times. It is also of benefit if one allows it to be. Fortunately I don't find myself lost or confused, just perhaps more contemplative of the road I have chosen. And I am where I am because of my choices, of that I have no doubt. I can also say I have few regrets. Oh, there are things I would do differently, I think we all would agree given the chance, but living with regret, no. Complaints only lead to further complaints.
So I find myself standing here just looking around. I like what I see and the surroundings are comforting. I've got a good thing going on, as the saying goes. I think I have attained the most important things in life. We may all wonder about our purpose in life and that is natural. What purpose do we serve ? Each of us are integral to the function of the whole. Becoming comfortable with your purpose is the challenge of man. Do you need to know that purpose ? I would say no. Results rely upon actions not goals. Knowing what you are to accomplish would certainly be of benefit but it is not our lot. We have been told how to live our lives and that is enough. Do that, and you fulfill your purpose.
I think I will just continue on this path. That may sound arrogant or self righteous but I don't feel that way. I just think I am fortunate to not have strayed too far off. I am thankful to friends ,family and my God for that. There is nothing wrong with feeling as though you are doing alright. To my way of thinking, changing directions too often only leads to confusion. Everything happens for a reason, I believe that. It was time to stop and smell the roses. Why ? I don't  know and I don't need to know. Perhaps it was just a reminder. Perhaps it was to provide further motivation. I don't think it was necessarily an indicator to change courses. You know everything that affects you, isn't about you. That is a lesson that is hard to learn. It is also a lesson that is even harder to apply in our lives. As the kids nowadays would say, " get over yourself. " Yup, that about says it. 

Places in time

Saw an old photograph yesterday from about 1960 or so. It was a picture of the movie theater in the town of my raising. Memories immediately flooded my mind seeing that. Then the thought, it was much larger than that. Probably was when I was a kid. Seems like a lot of things were. I visited my childhood home some years back, it had mysteriously grown much smaller too. I expect it all has something to do with time and space. Maybe that is why the expression, " it's a small world " rings so true. That big bang theory says the universe is expanding but maybe it is contracting instead ! I think that would depend upon your point of view, kinda like the glass being half empty or half full. All depends.
But about that old movie theater. It burned down in 1964 and was quite the fire and the talk of the town for many years. It was a classical theater with a stage, a balcony, plush velvet drapes and cushioned seating. Quite the elegant theater. I remember with fondness holding hands with my girl in that theater, I won't mention names but perhaps she remembers as well. Couldn't tell you the movie we saw, that was unimportant, but remember the girl. I was all of ten. And they called it " puppy love " ! Well those tickets , plus candy cost near to two dollars ! That was serious business.
There was a jewelry store attached to the right hand side of that theater. My Aunt Edna worked there. The name of it was Scribners. I assume that was the owner. I didn't buy much in the way of jewelry in those days but would stop in to see her. I would especially stop in just before the saturday matinee. I would drop a few subtle hints and leave with enough for popcorn or a soda. Pretty sly, don't you think ? That was in the day when your parents could just drop you off at the movies and not worry about you. The ushers kept things under control ! There was no backtalk or any nonsense allowed. We still tried. The big kids went into the balcony. Smoking was allowed up there.
A new theater was built to replace the old Edwards theater. If memory serves me it was called the East Hampton Cinema. Modern and slick it had no where near the class of the old one. It still had only one screen though and a balcony. Did a little hand holding in that one too. I recall seeing a few films there. James Bond in Goldfinger stands out. Grand Prix with Paul Newman. My Mom worked as an usher for a while and I got free admission. Had a good friend that was an usher too. I don't know, going to the cinema didn't seem as fancy as going to the theater. Ah well, I did see the movies.
It was good to see that old photograph and remember. That is one of the best things about this social media. Shame everyone doesn't just use it for good things but it is what it is. Like most things, it is what you make it. I am grateful for that picture as it carried me away for just a little while. Old photos are as close to time travel as man is ever gonna get, in my opinion. I take advantage of that whenever I can. Thankful for the memories.

Simple

Funny how things change so quickly. I was in a settled pattern of activity and going along fine. Life was progressing at a comfortable pace. Now it seems like I'm living in a flurry of activity. I barely have time to think ! Everything is so rushed, so necessary. And that is the key here, necessary. I have much to accomplish and feel like I have little time to do it. I'm stressing out ! That is not at all like me. I am one of those people that doesn't do stress well. In the past I would have frequent brief explosions to relieve stress. As I grew older those periods of " blowing off steam " became less and less. There are several factors involved in that that I won't go into, suffice to say, I've calmed down considerably.
Anxious may be a better choice of words for the way I am feeling. I guess stress and anxiety go together, or so I've heard it said. I can do without either. Anxiety to me is more like fear and that isn't really what I feel. I don't feel afraid, just anxious for the future. I want to get on with it and return to a normal existence. What is normal to me, may not be to you. All of life is subjective. Being a man of faith I believe all things happen for a reason. Nothing is random ! May not be able to explain everything but that doesn't mean it just happens. There is a cause and effect to everything. What causes you to react may affect me. Then that happening to me isn't a random act, it was caused by you. See my logic here ? The domino effect may be the explanation to it all. Makes no difference if I am number two or number two hundred thousand in that chain it was caused by one. And there is but one ! And so there you have it, all solved. Simple.
Faith requires no logic. There is one and he controls it all. Simple. Makes sense to me. May cause me to wonder, to speculate about the reasoning behind such a decision, but doesn't change faith. Either you have faith or you don't. Simple.
My time is running short this morning. Life is racing at me and I must move forward with it. Things to do and places to go. I would like to spend more time pondering the mysteries of life and pontificating about them, but that isn't going to happen this morning ! Just don't have the time. Simple.
You know you can worry,plan,strategize, organize and categorize. You may sit and agonize over a choice for hours or sometimes days. In the end you make a decision. For me, when I have reached that point, I have decided, it is always easy. The answer I mean. I've decided to do this and that is what I will do. Simple. The real question is, how come life can be so complicated ? The answer ? Trying to find too many answers to questions we shouldn't even ask. It is , well, simple.

Lessons learned

A new year is approaching at lighting speed. The year of our lord, 2015, is at hand. And that is an amazing thing if you really consider it,at least for a person born in 1953 it is. I remember fragments from the 1950's but real memory for me begins in the sixties. Nineteen sixty five is a year I remember for some odd reason. Someone wrote a slogan in English class, Drive Alive in '65, that I still quote. In '65 the idea of 2015 seemed impossible. The grandchildren are teenagers in 2015 ! Say what ? Hard to believe.
Unfortunately as I watch the news and current events I'm getting the impression that 2015 is not going to be the year of our Lord. Seems the Lord is getting left behind. It isn't politically correct to mention such things anymore. No longer are we talking tolerance,we are talking elimination. I was taught to respect others religious beliefs. Yes, I was often told those others were " heathens " or that they would be denied passage into heaven, but I should sympathize with them. I wasn't taught to destroy them ! I wasn't taught it was wrong to acknowledge their faith with an appropriate greeting. And this trend toward the removal of prayer, of any sort, from our public life troubles me. Why should we have to hide our faith behind closed doors ? There is no shame in belief. If my belief bothers your conscience, perhaps it is your values that you should be examining.
Maybe it is nothing more than the advancing years. I realize to some this is their '65 or '75. They have not seen the social changes that I have. I remember well the " hippies " and how in tune they were to nature. Yeah, alright and their communes that ended in disaster. Such progressive thinking and freedom. Well, it was fun while it lasted, about a decade or so. Now it is nostalgia. Wasn't that way to those living in it though. I wasn't one of them as I found the whole thing phony, but that was just me. It just didn't relate to life as I knew it. Wandering around the country or college campuses doing nothing productive. Basing your life choices on a Beatles song ? Not where I was raised.
I can hope and pray for a return to the year of our Lord. And just what is that ? That is many things to many people. For me it is a time when we recognized that the teachings of the Bible were applicable to our lives. A time when we lived with that awareness. Yes, a time of conscience. Where is that social conscience today ? There appears to be more focus on treating animals correctly than caring for our fellow beings, humans. Indeed we allow and support all sorts of behaviors that we know to be wrong in the name of being correct. The voice of opposition is being drowned out by the voices of the weak willed majority.Bullies love company and it is easier to go with the crowd than to stand for the right. Bowing to social pressure we are sacrificing America as it existed for almost two hundred years. Throw all that to the wind in the name of progress ? I think not as I watch the regression of America. Don't believe me, watch the evening news sometime. What once were considered aberrations in society are now the norm. A new year is approaching fast, another chance for mankind. Let us not forget all can be gone in an instant ! As the scientists debate the Big Bang and the Pope confirms it let that serve as proof. A Big Bang indeed ! Works both ways though and that is the lesson we should be learning.

Still Interested

I missed writing a post yesterday. It is the second time in a week and a very unusual occurrence. I am very much aware of it. Funny how these habits and routines ingrain themselves in our lives. I don't feel like I had anything of great importance to say, just the exercise of writing I suppose. I have that same feeling this morning.
Today ,however, is a special day. Thirty years ago today I married. The years have been filled with every emotion a human can experience. The ups and downs of every marriage. The important part in all of that is that we are still together. Seems we both reached a mutual agreement. We can live together. That says a lot right there. Those hallmark cards will wax poetic about deep and abiding love. Yes, I love my wife. The truth is that we can share with each other, unconditionally. Doesn't sound romantic, but it is essential to that relationship we call marriage. There are no secrets and no regrets.
When you have been with someone for thirty years, and still look in wonder at the next day together, you have a good marriage. Sure we look and reminiscence at the past. The good times, the bad times, the children and choices made and that is great. But it is the looking forward that binds us. The desire to spend another day together learning about each other. Maintaining an interest ? You could put it that way I think. I'm still interested in her and I hope, she I. After all, she is my favorite.
I think the biggest stumbling block people have in their marriages is really quite simple. They forget that marriage is about " us " not me. When there are too many  " I's " in your sentences and thoughts things will degenerate quickly. A marriage, a union, a compact. A mutual agreement. It is " we " and not I. Yes, and sometimes you take it for the team ! As for me, I can't wait for the next chance to do just that. What is good for the team is good for me. 

Emotional response

I'm going back to work today. A return to the normal routine of life can be therapeutic. It can also be a struggle. My mind is in a different place and my patience is thin. We do tend to think others should be aware of our personal circumstances, when there is no logical reason why they should. I think that is a part of human nature. It is also human nature to ask and be curious. For various reasons I am not prepared to talk. Still, life goes on. That is a comfort in its' own right.
I have the morning news on and that is a return. I haven't been watching that lately either. So far, I haven't missed much. The news can be depressing. There are good things happening but it is the bad that gets the headlines. That has always been so and so that hasn't changed. The sensational interests us all. Funny how quickly the sensational can become the mundane though. We humans tend to adapt and absorb fairly quickly.
There are highs and lows. We are all aware of this and react differently. Some of us are sensitive to the slightest change and with others it takes a tidal wave to really get their attention. I would say I am not easily effected. In my present circumstance however, I am close to being overwhelmed. It is a feeling I dislike very much. I am thankful that I have reached a certain level of maturity. Not so many years ago an event of this magnitude would have been met differently. I'm glad I have grown up a little bit. The turbulence of youth has passed. Those fiery passions have subsided and measured response has replaced it. The emotion is there, the response is different. And that, is a good thing.
There are those that like to live there lives in extremes. I am not one of them. I like everything kept on a even keel. I'm no thrill seeker that much is sure. I also do not mourn loss for long. Some seek these extremes in levels but with me they are thrust upon me. I do my best to just meet them,deal with it and move on. I think it has something to do with the way my mind works. I like to analyze everything. In doing so, I often find  some logic. Logic leads to rational thought not emotional response. Rational thought is what is required in any crisis but emotional response is what we usually get. That is the human side of it. It is a balancing act. As I have written many times times before, balance is essential. I'm still a little shaken. Well, things will steady up.  

Circumstance

Organized thought is becoming difficult. So many things going through my mind.The realization that life as I knew it has changed makes an impact. I do not look forward with regrets but rather with nervousness. Can I measure up and hold up ? I pray for strength.
I write these words not in the search for sympathy. I write for the same reason I wrote before, a form of therapy. By expressing my thoughts, no matter how scattered, in writing it seems to clarify things. I am a " rules " person. If I see written rules I tend to follow them. I find this has always been so for me. A quirk in my personality ? Perhaps, but it is almost a compulsion. And it is true with almost all written rules I see. Oh, I will go contrary to them on occasion, but those occasions are rare.
I am very much aware when I do and feel uncomfortable with that. Others can also cause me discomfort with their disobeying of the " rules. "
I suppose it has something to do with expectations. Following the rules reduces unexpected results and behaviors. Being a mechanical oriented person by nature I expect things to work and react in a certain fashion. I want things to go by the rules. It's a comforting thing to me. Even when I do not know from first hand experience what the reaction will be I trust those writing the rule do. I think that is why I tend to follow them, I trust others to know.
Now I feel a need to spell out what I expect from myself. It is my hope that by doing so I will write those rules. Then, having written the rules I am somewhat bound to follow them. Sounds a little strange I know but that is how it works with me. The old adage, a man's word is his bond runs deep in me. If it is written down there really is no escape from that obligation. I must not allow my compulsion to follow the rules to become overbearing to others however. That is where conflict begins, the insistence of doing things " my way. " I often feel justified in that action because they are the rules. It can present a bit of a quandary. In the end I should not feel responsible for the decisions of others but I often do, after all, I told them. If I am not persuasive enough is that my fault ? It would seem so to my way of thinking. I am obligated to try and not quit. It is the control of temperament that will be key. Avoiding anger and frustration in the implementation of the rules. To guide by mutual compliance, not by coercion or force is the goal. I think the first " rule " I must remember is, the rules have not changed !" The only thing changed is circumstance. 

Looking around

The last few days I have been speaking of my troubles. I'm afraid I became a little self centered. It is a coping mechanism. I think I need to convince myself before I can convince others. Yes this will pass, and I will adapt. I have caused some concern on the part of those that are regular readers of my postings. It is a comfort to know that others are listening and understanding. This world wide web can be supportive as well. I reposted a sticker I saw the other day that sums that up nicely. The sticker said, " what better use of Facebook than to pray for each other. " Isn't that a wonderful thought ? I agreed that I could find no better use.

There is much to be done over the next few weeks. Any interruption in the normal everyday routine is upsetting but prolonged interruption has it's own challenges. I must remember that all this affects those around me in a profound way as well. This isn't about just me. I know that, but acceptance does not come easily. I can empathize but that doesn't mean I am living their life. 

I have been focused on a central issue. The time has come however, that the peripheral needs must be addressed. Unfortunately I don't live in a made for tv movie. I don't have unlimited funds and must return to work. You know, those mundane things that enable you to just exist. We're just regular people here, with regular problems. The holidays also loom large. We all want that sense of normalcy and life moves on. Now the return to that routine is abnormal and upsetting. It comes with a sense of guilt. Guilt for doing what you know must be done. A frustrating feeling. Mixed emotions and a need to justify your actions, even when you know there is no reason that you should feel that way. It does not change the feeling. 

Today, for a myriad or reasons, I will go to my grandson's soccer tournament. The choice to do this would seem a simple one but it is not. It is one of those peripheral activities. Done in contrast to my own wants, to satisfy other needs. A part of the rebuilding process. It is a step and like all first steps taken with a bit of hesitation. It is a start. There is a goal and I am cautiously moving toward that goal. I am grateful for this outlet and grateful that others read and understand. I feel connected to a supportive force. I have my God and my friends. My God gives me strength and my friends provide reassurance. Life can be complicated at times, and at others, as simple as a smile. 

Perspective

Gaining a new perspective. That is what I am embroiled in at the moment. Actually it is more than a moment, but that's the applicable expression. Oh, if it were only over in a moment. Significant and lasting changes take time to absorb. Although things are going quite well, there is trepidation. I can not know for certain what the future holds. The future is something we usually give little thought to. We may anticipate things to come, almost always good things, but never give thought to the bad. Caught off guard and unprepared it can take your breath away.
This is the recovery phase. The damage has been done and repairs begun. Regaining your breath and assessing the situation,deciding upon a course of action. These are the things that may scare you or cause uneasiness. Action must be taken. It is the fear of making the wrong move that causes hesitation. And yet, I feel like the response should be without hesitation. Someone must keep that steady hand on the tiller.
To gain that new perspective you have to change position. It really is as simple as that. Change the angle and you change the perspective. So just what is the angle ? The angle is from where you approach the situation. Setting goals to accomplish things you have previously taken for granted. Things that were granted. That is the troubling part, the loss of what we had. I'm not talking about material objects, they can be replaced, I'm talking about emotions and the intangibles. You can look from a position of strength or see weakness. Having found that angle the establishment of a firm foothold is next. A feeling of confidence. That internal mechanism that says, I can do this.
I am still standing upon shifting ground. That firm foothold can not be established. Anxious for a resolution, yet patience is what is required at this time. Patience is not inaction, although it certainly seems that way. Just as empathy and sympathy are separate things, the distinction is a fine one. I am anxious to be proactive, but there is nothing I can do. I am sympathetic, but must remain firm. And so inaction is the action. Patience becomes proactive. New perspectives gained ? Doesn't feel that way. 

Not our choice

The storm still rages around me but I have a course set. I feel better for knowing what lies ahead in the immediate future but uneasy for the long term. Normal has indeed changed. Where will the new normal settle ? That is the question that causes the most anxiety. There is nothing one can do about that unless you can gaze into a crystal ball. The future is not ours to know. Predictions, no matter how well intended or factually based, offer little relief. Reassurances they are called. They even sound hollow when you offer them, but what else can we do ?
Something positive almost always comes out of these happenings. We may not see it at first but it is there. I can see positive results as a possibility but my confidence is low. The struggle to remain positive is tiring. We all have our jobs to do and must carry our share. That is how we get through these things, by helping one another and working together. Forever forward.
Bad things do happen to good people. That is just the reality of life. I believe we can influence those actions but not control them. And so, bad things sometimes happen. It does no good to sit and question why. Our time is better spent looking for the answers to the problem. There will plenty of time to ponder the why's later on. I do not feel targeted in this universe. I don't think anyone is targeted, just participants in the grand scheme. We do not get to choose our roles.

Into the storm

I find it much easier to write and pontificate on life, and the living of it, when things are going smooth.Well, not really smooth per se, more like normal. My little world has been shaken lately and things are not normal. I feel the desire to write my morning blog, that is normal right ? Or is that compulsive ? Whatever the case I am finding little to write about. My thoughts being preoccupied with other things. Perhaps the desire to write this blog is a struggle for normalcy. That is not a bad thing. I do believe in just moving on. The old adage every journey begins with one step is true. Just keep walking is another way of saying that. Every once and a while a little rain must fall. That doesn't mean you should drown in the puddles !
I find myself anxious and impatient. I'm anxious for the future and what it may bring. I'm also impatient for things to unfold. I want to reach the new normal and the comfort that comes with that. Unsettled and upset is what I am. Trying to react in a way that is comforting and reassuring for another is my primary focus at this time. How best to do that ? I think just by being my normal self. Problem is, things aren't normal. I'm not normal either. I know, there are those that will say they have known that for some time, ha ha, but that isn't what I'm talking about. Acting normal in an abnormal situation is a challenge. You can come off as cold and impersonal. A tip too far in the other direction can cause consternation on the other person's part. Maintaining an even keel is what is desired. In heavy seas it best to go head on, and not wallow in the trough. Good advice in life as well. Don't wallow in  the trough. In other words don't stay in the low spots but rise to the top. There will be ups and downs but you can navigate. Chart a course and stick to the compass. My compass is my faith. You know, it makes little difference if the waters are calm or stormy you should always follow that compass. It is easy to become complacent in calm waters. It is also easy to grasp at that compass when heavy weather strikes. The fair weather sailor has little confidence in a storm. I am confident I'll weather this tempest, my compass never fails.

Uncertainty

Every once and a while something happens that can change the game. I dislike that unsettled feeling. I can deal with changes,even major changes, without much difficulty, it is only the transitional phase that bothers me. The period until the new norm arrives causes fluctuations in my mood and behavior. Everything from empathy to anger and frustration. It is difficult to remember that this too shall pass.
The most difficult realization is that you have little control. The decision making is being controlled by fate and circumstance. There are outsiders in your business. Adjustments must be made. It is the uncertainty that nags at me. It is a time of trial.
For some this comes as a revelation and an awareness. For others it comes as a bother. And then, for most of us, I think we experience both. Guilt may creep in also. What if's and  I should have. It is the "spilled milk " syndrome. This can be a time of frantic activity or complete inaction. It is hard to concentrate.
My general reaction is to put on my " big boy " pants and deal with it. I do not like to ask for help, nor readily accept it when offered. What is it they say ? Pride cometh before the fall. Well, not if you remain standing. For me, I can deal with whatever actions I have taken or not taken. It is when I follow the advice of others, and that goes awry, that I am seriously bothered. I must live with my conscience, not theirs.
Now is the time to follow the advice you give to others. That can be a very difficult thing indeed. It is always easier to give advice than to follow it. This is the time when you will discover inner secrets. Can I live up to my own words or are they hollow rhetoric ? The crisis may not be about me, but the reaction is.
I do believe a positive approach is best. Hope for the best, and accept whatever it is. Understanding that I do not have the choice to set the standard is the pivotal feature in these situations. I must react to events as presented to me. Fortunately I am not alone. I have support from family and my God. This too shall pass. Will the game change ? Perhaps for a little while,perhaps forever. Only time will tell. Transitions are unsettling to say the least. The most important thing is to remain calm. 

Obstacles

For all my blogging and discussion of the issues I remain a somewhat private person. There are certain areas I do not share publicly or readily with others. Now, I'm not talking about the juicy details or what I would call, dirty laundry, nothing like that. I'm talking about health issues, personal finances and that sort of thing. I believe it is unfair to place others in that position. There is nothing they can do but offer sympathy. It is always an awkward conversation. For those reasons, I  keep that stuff to myself.
Each of us deal with obstacles in a different way. Some of us attack with a fury, while others calmly tackle the issue. For some the strength required is immediate. The strain of that will not be felt until the problem has been resolved. In others the initial shock staggers them. These people gain in strength as time passes. Personally I try to take a pragmatic approach. I will have more emotional responses afterwards. The difficulty lies in separating the two. Allowing the mind to run ahead into possibilities does little for me. I tend to run toward toward the negative side. That can be draining. I much prefer to take things one step at a time. Each little victory pushing me forward.
This morning I find myself faced with just such a challenge. It is upsetting and difficult but I will prevail. Life goes forward. There are times when we are alone in this world and that is alright. It is those times that test us. We must meet the challenge. There are also times when we must abandon our little world for the good of another. That is called living.
And so today's posting is short, there is little to be said. There is always a time for talking and a time for doing. It is time to do. Should you pray, include me in your offerings. What is required is known to the one that can help, and that is enough. A little extra couldn't hurt though.
 

Avenues of Acceptance

I was talking with my grandson when he told me about some of his classmates. He was telling me how some like to curse. He said he asked one of them why and he told him because everyone else does. I said, Mark, that is one avenue to acceptance but not one I agree with. He agreed that it was a quick way to fit in and be part of the group, but didn't agree with it either. We talked a little more and he was telling me a lesson from a movie he had watched. God isn't dead, I believe is the name of it. I have not seen it. Evidently it made a positive impression upon him. Having not seen the movie, the story he tried to tell me was difficult to understand, but that wasn't important anyway. What was important was having the discussion. I think the best discussions we have with our children and grandchildren are the ones that are spontaneous. Also the ones that only last a few minutes. Just talking is best.
Mark did tell me about taking the same path as everyone else. How doing that was a lot easier and more comfortable. He also said it was more dangerous. there are a lot of places one can go on that path and not all of them good. I think that was the lesson from that movie that we was trying to explain. I told him I would rather travel with just a few close friends, friends that I could trust, than travel on a crowded highway. There are many avenues to acceptance and not all are crowded. I did tell him that you can travel the same highway as everyone else, but you don't have to make the same stops ! That is pretty much where that discussion ended and we began to talk about soccer.
It was after talking with Mark about this that I began to think as well. What avenues of acceptance had I chosen ? I would say I have traveled many. I have made many stops along the way and not all were good. I was fortunate that in my youth, growing up where I did, I was given a certain amount of freedom. And that freedom extended to being who you were. There were people in that town that were what some would call " different " but we just called them "characters." As in, he's some character, ain't he ? On the surface one might think that was a bad thing, but it wasn't. That was a lesson I learned. It was alright to be different. I would say our " avenue of acceptance " was a broad street indeed. I was taught, by example, that many types of people walked the street and they were just as entitled to do that as I. It also didn't mean I had to make the same stops. But being a curious fellow by nature ,I have made most of them. I have spent the majority of my life unaware of that. I think that is the way it is with most of us. There does come a time of an awakening or realization, whatever term you like to use. I became aware of that lesson. The " avenue of acceptance " is not a narrow path but rather a broad street, yes an avenue. You can walk the avenue with everyone else but that doesn't mean you have to frequent the same stops as they do ! That is to say, in modern parlance, "you don't have go there. " It also means you must accept the fact that others do. It is the later that takes a while to understand. Sometimes we must walk alone on the avenue. Walking alone doesn't indicate you are correct, but that you are considerate. It is only when we try to drag others into our stops that issues arise. Then we become an imposition. Are there times when we should ? Absolutely.
To just follow the crowd is the easier way, to be sure. Just as Mark said, it is a more comfortable route. To just allow others, especially those you love, to just enter those " bad stops " along the way isn't being much of a friend. That's not what friends are for. That's what the crowd is for. Finding our own path through the crowd is a difficult thing and requires help at times. That's what friends are for. Friends don't always listen, but always hear. What you need are those that stay on the avenue with you. Some will stop and never return, for others it is just a delay. The thing to remember is, do not judge people by the stops they make, but rather by the path they walk. The ones that return are your friends, all the others are just travelers. Mark eluded to this statement," in the end we will all face a stairway, the stairs go either up or down", the path you chose decides which stairway you get. Perhaps that is from that movie, I don't know, but it is a truth. I would say this, the stairs going up or down may be heaven and hell, but may be happiness or sorrow as well. Choose your path on the avenue wisely. It is a big world out there. There are many " avenues to acceptance " but it is the path you follow that counts. If you find yourself going up and down stairs a lot, especially down, you may what to reevaluate the path you are on. I'm not saying leave the avenue, just adjust your path.

Empowered

There was a time when I would hear new slang words being used. Words like cool,keen,groovy and far out man. I still hear a few occasionally, the newest for me being, swag. I'm not sure if you have swag or just buy swag but that is not the point. That is because I'm not into that scene man.
Maybe it is due to my age. I'm sure it is  a product of my social group, but I'm just not hip to it. Now I hear other terms being used. The latest one I hear all the time is empowerment ! I feel empowered. Apparently you can be empowered by the menu at the McDonalds. Clothes may empower you, at least according to the Gap. The way it is being used these days all of us must be oppressed ! I didn't know that. I didn't realize that my actions were dependant upon permission from anyone else, let alone a product or service. As long as I pay, I am empowered ? Um, I guess so. It just sounds like someone discovered this word in the dictionary, maybe a Google suggestion, and started applying it to everything. Anytime you do anything at all, you are empowered. That is especially so if it affects your " quality of life. " That's another little phrase I have problems with. My quality of life is also not dependant upon you,your products, or your permission. Do not try to tell me what my " quality " should be. Can't we just go back to calling each other Dog ? Yo Dog, what's happening ? I'm down with that ! At least those make me chuckle.
I don't know, the use of these phrases just doesn't ring true with me. They sound hollow and pretentious.Sounds like an attempt to sound sophisticated. Problem is the application of the term doesn't apply most of the time ! Liberating is an appropriate synonym. Buying a Big Mac or a new pair of jeans at the Gap doesn't sound liberating to me. Liberated from what ? Social pressure or body image ? Maybe those that use this just like to feel like they have the power. I'm empowered. I can choose what I want. I'm writing this blog, I feel empowered ! Ha Ha Ha
If we in America spent as much time and effort actually working on issues rather than describing them, we might get something accomplished. We do pay a lot of lip service to everything. No longer do we just state the facts as we see them. Now .apparently, we need to be empowered. It all just sounds like we need our ego's massaged. The search for approval is more important than the search for the best answers.
I do tend to get carried away sometimes. Maybe this is one of those. It is just that all this " pep " talk of being empowered annoys me. To me it is kinda like when " rappers " figured out words could rhyme. Now they call it music and receive awards for that. Expressing the social conscience, they say. Yeah, okay. Well, twenty three skidoo and Tyler too.

Anticipation

Living for the moment. I have heard this phrase used many times to justify many things. There is some wisdom in that we never know when it all may be gone. Life can change in an instant. Still, I believe I can move forward with confidence and hope for tomorrow. I look forward to the next day, not to the end. I also try to remain conscious of what I may be leaving behind. I try to act accordingly. These are my thoughts as I work and play. It is at work that I find myself frustrated with this philosophy. I get increasingly annoyed with  those that do not think in this fashion. That is to say, those that do not consider consequences.You know the kind, they do what they have to do for themselves, and no more. These are the ones that make it difficult for others. It is true at work and in life.
I believe we should live a considered life. Look before you leap, if you will. That is sage advice. I have had my share of not following that advice and experiencing bad results. We should consider others, if for no other reason than to satisfy our own philosophy. We are, after all, responsible for our own happiness. Therein lies a truth many never learn. It is our actions,reactions and inaction that form our life. We have control over that. Others will certainly influence our responses, but ultimately it is up to us. When others fail to meet our expectations we are disappointed. We may confuse disappointment with anger. That is something to guard against. It happens with me all the time. I am learning to recognize it. It doesn't lessen the frustration however. Learning to let it go is the challenge, I find the older I get the more the desire to instruct. Maybe that is why " seniors " say the things that that do ! It is part of the cycle. Is there some innate need to share our truths and wisdom before we leave ? I know I have been accused of always wanting the last word. It is true I usually have something more to add.
The irony in all of this is that the exclusion of others will not guarantee our happiness. It is the actions of others that give us the greatest satisfaction. We are all vain creatures in the end. We want others to speak well of us. For some this becomes an obsession. There are others that will feign indifference but they fool no one but themselves. They become the bitter ones. I think the trick may be to learn to live for each moment but in anticipation of the next. Isn't that the promise of heaven ? Considered spontaneity ? Humm, now that is a conundrum. Life can be confusing at times, frustrating even. But I wouldn't have it any other way. 

Adult conversation

I must be getting a few years on me now.I have become comfortable talking about most anything. That is a sign of age,not necessarily maturity. I also seem to have developed a few quirks. I won't go into those however. I am also not surprised by the things my fellow " senior " citizens may say to me. I can only assume they feel as though I am there contemporaries. I appreciate the sentiment,in most cases, but I'm not quite in their category yet ! A case in point, yesterday an elderly lady asks me if we sell prunes. I assure her we do and show her where to find them. On our short walk to the proper aisle she explains that her husband is having problems with his bowels. Their daughter recommends prunes. The thing is, not only does she feel comfortable with this conversation, it doesn't bother me either. I tell her my uncle George uses prune juice for the same reason. See what I mean ?
Working mostly with a younger crowd these differences sometimes are highlighted. I will say this much, the younger crowd are far more free speaking with their elders than I was at their age. A sign of the times I suppose. I was stocking the shelves the other day and had sat a box down on my way to the shelf. I was called away for a moment. When I returned the box was gone. I stood there,staring for just a moment. A co-worker than says to me, Mr. Ben I put that box away. My reply, don't do that to an old guy, I couldn't remember if I sat it down or not ! Sometimes I think those kids are messin' with me. These little incidents happen all the time. Occasionally, not very often, a younger guy will offer to lift something for me. I'm still young enough that I say ,no thanks, I got it. Young enough or foolish enough, that is up for debate.
There are employees that I rarely see. They work a few hours a night and on the weekends. Now this has nothing to do with age but I have always been this way. If I do not see you often and speak with you, I probably will not remember you. I could be standing next to the most famous person in the world and probably not recognize them. I would be the worst eye witness imaginable. So yesterday, while I'm working, this young lady walks by and says, Hello. I smile back and say Hi. There is an awkward moment and she moves on. I turn to another co-worker and say, should I know her ? I am told she works here. Who knew ? Then this co-worker, the one I'm talking to says, you answered her. I tell her,yes, I answered her. Anytime a pretty lady speaks to me I answer, I figure it must be my rugged good looks that attract'em ! That drew a laugh. You can say stuff like that at my age.
And it isn't just at work either. Just yesterday I was sitting on the couch at home and said to my wife, I'm feeling a little funny. I feel a little warm. And then, just like that, she says, it's probably just hot flashes, deal with it ! Where's the empathy, the compassion. Turns out all I needed to do was take off my sweatshirt. Geez.
I was raised in a time when children were seen and not heard. I was not privy to adult conversations. Adults always talked down to you in a condescending way. That wasn't their intent, but that is how it always seemed to me. Patronizing is the word for that. As I grew older I was included. I haven't given it much thought in many years. I did wonder just what it was those adults were talking about that us kids was not supposed to hear. When I got older I figured I knew. The truth is it isn't what I thought at all. Turns out old people talk the most about bodily functions, or the lack thereof, and the younger people. That is why we were not supposed to hear. They were talking about us ! That is when they weren't comparing bowel functions or age spots.
It is a sobering realization. I have reached the age where I am included in the adult conversations. Now, the younger ones remain silent around me. These same youngsters attempt conversation with me when the mood strikes them. I hope I don't sound condescending. The most surprising thing about all of this is, the conversations aren't all that much fun. The adult ones I mean. I mean I really don't want to hear about your husbands bowel functions. It is a burden I have to bear at this age. Sometimes I feel like saying, that's just wack ! I'm cool like that. 

Vote

It is election day ! Hooray I get to speak today. My voice will be heard. There was a day when I didn't give that a thought. I just went along merrily with my life, ignoring my civic duty and then complaining. Sounds like a good number of people in this country doesn't it ? Yes, I am no different. But at some point that attitude changed. I don't know when that happened exactly, but it happened. I have voted in every presidential election since I was eighteen. The mid-term contests are the ones that got ignored. I do think this all corresponded with my understanding of government. The more I knew about how the government actually works, the more important I felt it to vote. I now know that controlling the house and senate does not guarantee your party's success, but it does get you heard. And that is the important part of the process, just getting the voice ! First you must be heard.
It is easy to become jaded with the whole process and idea. My vote doesn't count is commonly heard. The truth is that your vote does count. That is why the politicians spend so much money campaigning. If your individual vote wasn't valuable, wouldn't they target their funds elsewhere ? The real issue here is the reasoning behind that. The truth is that we live in a republic. A simple majority will win the election. That is the important part, to gain that voice. It is the first step. But in a republic a simple majority will not get legislation passed. That requires that two thirds vote that you hear about. Starting out with 50% sure is an advantage. Then I only need a portion of the opposition to agree. And that, my friends, is politics. And that is where a lot of people get confused. Contrary to what you hear in school and speeches all the time, we are not a democracy. We are a republic ! A republic means , by the people, not by a simple majority. Fifty one per cent will not cut it. Two thirds is required. You do get to vote, a voice in that process.
The squeaky wheel gets the grease. That is an old saying and one that holds a basic truth. Be that squeak ! It is the malcontents that holler the loudest. It is also those that feel they have the most to gain that will be heard. That is human nature. The rest of us need to remain calm and vote ! Your vote should be a reasoned choice. What is the best course of action to be taken ? Choose the candidate that best represents your vision. They don't call them representatives for nothing. They will represent you !
That is my election day speech. Thanks for listening. And please, vote.

Something to consider

Having an interest in history and genealogy I have spent some time in the cemetery. I find it a nice place to visit but I don't want to live there. There, I got that out of my system. This year I will be participating in wreaths across america. In case you have not heard of this endeavor allow me to explain. On Dec 13 wreaths will be placed on the graves of our veterans all across America. This is supposed to happen at the same time on that day. The local Funeral homes are acting as coordinators for this event. There is a website, wreathsacrossamerica.org , where you can go and order your wreath or wreaths. You can find the local cemeteries for whomever you wish to sponsor. Suppose you live in Florida but your loved one is interred in New York. No problem, the wreath will be sent to the appropriate funeral home and placed on your deceased loved ones' grave. That is it,in a nutshell. I will be helping place the wreaths here in the Greensboro cemetery. I think it is a wonderful thing. For every two wreaths purchased a third will be given free. The wreaths not designated for a specific individual will be placed on the grave of a veteran. The hope is no on will be forgotten.
As I said I have spent some time in the local cemetery. I leave a flag on the graves of three vets in there on Memorial day and Veterans day. Two of these vets I knew personally, and the other is a civil war veteran. Colonel Comegy. I choose that grave at random and have placed a flag there every year for several years now. The census shows no Comegy family name around here any longer. I know the Colonel's son moved to Pa. in the late 1800's. I think the Colonel would be pleased.
There is a mausoleum in there as well. It is the final resting place of Mr. C.B.Jarman. I have not done  a lot of research about him but I do not believe he is a veteran. He was a very prominent businessman around these parts. His father, T.H. Jarman had the very first hardware store in Greensboro. It was Mr. C.B. Jarman that brought the telephone to Greensboro, the very first one. It was located in his hardware store. But enough about that, the thing that I was thinking about in regard to that mausoleum is that the door is locked. I am friends with the caretaker of this cemetery. I asked him who had the key. I was expecting him to say that the local funeral director had that. His response was, I don't know. Mr. Jarman, being a man of some wealth, had a hired man that was his caretaker. This man was the last person known to have that key. He had passed many years back and the whereabouts of that key is a mystery. This gentleman was a man of color and it is reported that he took some ribbing from his contemporaries. Apparently they teased him about attending to the " white " guy and that he would be buried in there too. That turned out not to be the case, as he was interred in a separate cemetery It was a cemetery mostly used by those of color.Perhaps he took the key with him.
I was thinking about this as it applies to the wreath endeavor. Although Mr. Jarman is not a veteran it occurred to me that a wreath could not be properly laid for him. His door is locked ! There are no more Jarmans' in the area. As often happens his offspring moved elsewhere to pursue their lives and never returned to Greensboro. And now the key to his home is lost. I thought, the best you could do would be to leave a wreath at his doorstep. It just struck me as a rather lonely thing. The door has been closed,no one is sure for how many years, and will remain so. For all his wealth and success he can receive no visitors. I do know that there are two empty vaults in that mausoleum. Mr. Jarman had anticipated company, he is still waiting.
In thinking about all of this I began to wonder. How many veterans lie in cemeteries across America waiting ? Waiting for a visit. But is not so much that they are  being forgotten, but as being misplaced. Families and friends moving on and they are left behind. The Colonel and Mr. Jarman, Clinton to his friends and family, being just two examples. That is why I will be getting my wreaths. Truly," let us not forget " are more than sentimental words, Merry Christmas to all the vets. Maybe I will leave a small token outside the door of Mr. Jarman,even though he is not a vet. Something to consider.

Cavalier or cavalier ?

I was watching the Army/Air Force football game. It was being played at West Point. As the camera scanned the crowd, notably the Corps of Cadets, I couldn't help but notice they were wearing fatigues. As a retired Navy man I notice these things. There was a time, in the not too distant past when they would have all been in their dress uniforms. I wonder when that tradition changed. Or more properly, it was not a tradition, but mandatory. In the Navy we would call it the uniform of the day. It was the prescribed uniform to be worn for that day and/or event. I'm not familiar with Army terminology. But, the point here is they would have been in their dress uniforms. Fatigues seem a bit casual to me. And that is at the center of today's thought. I'm thinking things have gotten a little too casual these days. There is an old saying, familiarity breeds contempt, and I understand the logic behind that thought. I would have to agree with it. And I would also say people display a lot of contempt these days : coincidence, I think not.
I know I am repeating myself. I make a conscious effort to avoid doing that in my blogging. Still I know I fail. I think as long as I know it and admit to it, it isn't the same thing. Circular reasoning . At any rate, I can't help but think that life is a formal occasion and should be lived that way, at the very least, publicly. Formality is conducive to respect. I would go as far as to say, a vital element. Isn't that what that old saying is talking about ? That is why we say Sir and Ma'am. By addressing those we are not familiar with in that fashion, we extend a measure of respect. You often hear that respect must be earned. That is a fair statement. I do believe respect should be offered first. Whether or not that person earns my continued respect is up to them. Actions, not appearances, mark the man. Everyone is deserving until proven otherwise.
I think just as " clothes make the man " so too our manner of speech. How is one related to the other ? I would say the lessening of formality is a lessening of effort and expectations. That is not to say it requires fancy clothes, but rather it requires effort. Our expectations are lowered when that formality is no longer required. We can now just, go as we are. That attitude encourages us to, just act as we are. Often, when we just act without thought, we act contrary to society's expectations. It requires effort to consider those expectations and act accordingly. It is this tempering of our words and actions that makes for a congenial society. I see a lessening in that regard in the general public today. We are no where near as congenial as we were forty years ago. Have we become paranoid, or has society degenerated that much ? I suggest it is a result of this lessening of formality. The lowering of expectations and effort required. Being held to a higher standard is another way of saying that. It certainly appears that way to me. I would say the moral and ethical values being taught as acceptable in today's society are not the same as preceding generations.
There are those that will argue that is because we are more educated. We have advanced our society with more liberal views and tolerance. We have made changes. I can see that, but not all changes are for the better. Acting in an unconsidered and unrestrained manner is not a good thing. Structure is a requirement for a society to exist. Within that structure there are standards to be met. That is the expectation. Effort is required is to satisfy those expectations. Our approach has become far too casual. Cavalier is the word that comes to mind. Not the chivalrous knights of old, but the offhand attitude. A showing of a lack of proper concern. We should be concerned. We should be just as concerned for others as we are for ourselves.
I can sum all this up with a couple of phrases I often heard at home. You ain't going out of the house looking like that ! and If you can't act right, you're going home ! I'm thinking more people need to be hearing those two bits of instruction. I think it would go a long way to making a better world. 

There are many paths

The Pope now says that the big bang and evolution are real. He also says they are not incompatible with a creator. I Agree with him. I wrote an essay about this very subject some time ago, maybe he read it ! LOL, I don't think so and this idea has been around for a very long time. It is just that the conditions are right to make such a proclamation. Attendance is down and the church is a business like every other. Time to attract another group of buyers. New young customers are not easy to attract in this particular market.
Now don't go thinking I am bashing the Pope or the Catholic church. I am not. I do not think the admission of these theories is a compromise in faith. As the Pope said, this does not exclude a creator, it requires one. No matter how you look at it, it all had to happen somehow. The Bible says ,on the first day God created the heavens and the earth. How long is a day ? Sure, we circle the sun in twenty four hours but how long does it take for the galaxy ? You could look at it a different way. You build a pyramid one block at a time don't you ? Wouldn't it make sense to build a universe the same way ?
I will not go into that discussion here as I have already done so elsewhere. The only thing I find a bit troubling about this is it does appear to be a bit of a compromise. It can appear as a chip in the wall, To those of little or no faith. I am concerned about this presentation. Faith can not be proven, either it is or it is not. To those of us whose faith in a little stronger these proclamations will not shake us. I do think this really only affects those looking for a validation of their faith. The truth is this validation can only be provided by yourself. No one can convince you to believe. The how is not as important as the why. Why should you believe ? That is a question to ask yourself, and to ask your Priest or Pastor. When you reach the point where you no longer need to ask, you will have achieved faith. The important message is not how creation happened. The important message is the dissemination of a moral and ethical code to live our lives by. The method to get people to listen is called Religion. It is the promise of eternal life that has used as the main attraction in this function, and the threat of eternal damnation if ignored. Not surprising given the nature of man. Some may accuse me of having a pragmatic approach, and I can see their point, but I think as long as I am comfortable with that it does no harm. There is more than one path to faith. The destination however, is the same. It is that end result that we should be seeking. And the end result is what ? To live our lives in a moral and ethical fashion and contribute to society ? I believe that is part of it. There is more. It is the more that has us all confused. What is that ? As for me, I can only go on faith. I believe my soul will still exist in some fashion. I have ideas about that as well. I also believe my theories are just as valid as the Big Bang or evolution. I do not require science to " prove " my faith. Nor can science disprove it !