Coming and Going

 I was chatting with a cousin of mine online. I believe I have met this cousin, once, many years ago but can't confirm that. I have many cousins that I have never met, some I even went to school with ! Anyway, this cousin asked why we never met. We didn't live in the same town growing up, she lived seven miles away from my town, but still. It is a good question and one that I can only speculate about. I believe it has to do with those " circles " we hear about. You know, those social circles we travel in. Like bubbles we tend to float around and interact with other things. Sometimes the bubbles join up and sometimes they pop. In other cases they just never meet at all.

 After having this little chat with her I began to think about this. I began to remember how my circle has changed over the years. I reflected back on my passage so far. It has been the environmental factors that have affected me the most. I don't think that can be denied. Environmental influences being the strongest motivator. By that I mean the people you work with and the people you associate yourself with. There are those you emulate and those you despise. That is the environment I'm talking about here. The weather has little to do with it. 

 When we are children this is mostly controlled by our parents. It is their choices that we have to live with. A lot depends upon the cycle we are caught in. Are they still young enough to be in that, I know it all party cycle ? Perhaps they have progressed to the " responsible " parent phase. Could be they are very religious or very liberal. Some parents change over the years and some remain the same. What I mean is, personal growth. Some do, some don't and some just won't. So, who your parents hang out with is who you meet. The ones your parents don't, for whatever reason, you won't. Simple enough to understand. 

 When we start going to school that may change a bit, we start choosing our own friends. Parents may or may not approve of those choices. It is here when we are first faced with conflict. We want to change the circle a bit, include another. An environmental change, perhaps it will be stormy ! 

 Following our school years our circles begin to change again. Now the influences are our fellow workers. The degree to which we include them in our circle, or how much we are included in theirs, being the environment. Don't bring work home with you is the prevailing advice from experts. I tend to agree with that sentiment. That isn't to say you can't be friends with your co-workers just don't bring'em home. The higher up in the company you go, the more this applies. The unfortunate consequence is your circle grows smaller. You can't be friends and be the boss at the same time. It just doesn't work.

 Another major factor is where you live. Do you live in the town where you grew up ?  Have you adopted another place as home ? Or are you just still floating around ? There is the desire to " fit in. " That is to say, to adapt, to the environment. Not good to be a city slicker in a cornfield, know what I mean ? People do not like strangers in the circle. There must be some common ground that they share. I believe some just want all the ground for themselves. There are those that are just plain uncomfortable when outside their circle.

 Is life all just chance and circumstance ?  In many ways I would have to say so. You could say religion was " invented " to provide a sense of reason to this world. There are a lot of people adopting that sentiment these days. They believe themselves to be " smarter " than most. Oh, that isn't what they will come right out and say but down deep it is what they believe; for now. I believe for most that will change over time as well. An old gospel song comes to mind, " will the circle be unbroken " and the answer is no. The circle will never be broken. It has no beginning and no end. We will all one day be within the circle, it is just a matter of who gets to stay.