I was talking with my Mom, she is 86. That is something hard to believe, even harder for her I'm sure. She is doing well, health wise, and is living comfortably in Florida. We often discuss the news and what is going in the world. In conversation I said to her, it is a new world out there. Her reply resounded in my thoughts, "yes it is and I don't know how to live in it anymore . " She went on to tell me how the young people treat treat us " old folks " and what she thought worse, the way they treat each other. She wondered why everyone seemed so angry all the time. I couldn't help but agree with her observations. I see that all the time also. I would add that many seem afraid. Well, maybe afraid isn't the correct choice, leery is probably closer to the truth. Try looking directly into a strangers eyes and you will quickly see what I am talking about. Smiling and saying hello will be met equally with another smile or a worried look. Some even become obviously nervous and defensive ! I'm not sure this is what my Mom was talking about, but it certainly could be.
I do think my Mom was just remembering the old days. We can all agree that society has changed over the years. Speech and manner of dress to name just two aspects. You would have to agree that society in general has become less genial in their interactions. I have noticed that in my sixty one years and it must be even more so after eighty six.
Back to the statement that my Mom made, " I don't know how to live in it anymore " I have been considering that. Is that a result of a lack of flexibility on her part ? I mean by that, a failure to adopt to the modern ways of society and thinking ? Has she become " set in her ways " to the point were it is a hindrance ? Perhaps, and will it happen to me ? Does it happen to us all ? On the flip side of that is the statement, there is no fool like an old fool. I don't want to be in that category either. I think that perhaps we all struggle with acceptance our entire lives. Some of us may just give up and not care anymore, happy in our rut. And for others we may struggle to fit into the picture, to remain what we consider relevant. I think that maybe her statement has made me consider aging. I'm only sixty one and don't think of myself as old, but I work with some that think otherwise. At this time it is a bit amusing, but I can see where it would become frustrating. I believe that is what Mom was feeling when she made that statement.
Learning to live in the world is a lifetime endeavor. I would say success is measured by our own happiness, and the happiness of those around us. Tolerance is not acceptance and opinions are not facts. These are things we need to learn. Most know this, but when comparing them to experience it is difficult to rectify. We know the results of actions that we have taken and expect the same for others. Our opinion is a fact to us, just as our tolerance begins to demand compliance. Then the " rules " change and we no longer know how to live.
Now I am not worried about my Mom getting dementia or anything like that. I think she was just venting her frustration at the world. There are those that are challenging her thoughts and actions, her way of life. It is the normal interactions we have everyday. It is true that at eighty six she can not do all of the things that she could do, say, ten years ago. There are consequences to aging. The realization of that can be a sobering experience. I do thank her for saying what she said, although I could not tell her so, she continues to make me think. It is what a good mother does for her children. No one can talk to me the way my Mom does ! That is a part of my world. I was taught to listen, with no backtalk ! Seems to me some of these younger people need to learn that lesson. Well, it's a new world out there. It changes every day.
I do think my Mom was just remembering the old days. We can all agree that society has changed over the years. Speech and manner of dress to name just two aspects. You would have to agree that society in general has become less genial in their interactions. I have noticed that in my sixty one years and it must be even more so after eighty six.
Back to the statement that my Mom made, " I don't know how to live in it anymore " I have been considering that. Is that a result of a lack of flexibility on her part ? I mean by that, a failure to adopt to the modern ways of society and thinking ? Has she become " set in her ways " to the point were it is a hindrance ? Perhaps, and will it happen to me ? Does it happen to us all ? On the flip side of that is the statement, there is no fool like an old fool. I don't want to be in that category either. I think that perhaps we all struggle with acceptance our entire lives. Some of us may just give up and not care anymore, happy in our rut. And for others we may struggle to fit into the picture, to remain what we consider relevant. I think that maybe her statement has made me consider aging. I'm only sixty one and don't think of myself as old, but I work with some that think otherwise. At this time it is a bit amusing, but I can see where it would become frustrating. I believe that is what Mom was feeling when she made that statement.
Learning to live in the world is a lifetime endeavor. I would say success is measured by our own happiness, and the happiness of those around us. Tolerance is not acceptance and opinions are not facts. These are things we need to learn. Most know this, but when comparing them to experience it is difficult to rectify. We know the results of actions that we have taken and expect the same for others. Our opinion is a fact to us, just as our tolerance begins to demand compliance. Then the " rules " change and we no longer know how to live.
Now I am not worried about my Mom getting dementia or anything like that. I think she was just venting her frustration at the world. There are those that are challenging her thoughts and actions, her way of life. It is the normal interactions we have everyday. It is true that at eighty six she can not do all of the things that she could do, say, ten years ago. There are consequences to aging. The realization of that can be a sobering experience. I do thank her for saying what she said, although I could not tell her so, she continues to make me think. It is what a good mother does for her children. No one can talk to me the way my Mom does ! That is a part of my world. I was taught to listen, with no backtalk ! Seems to me some of these younger people need to learn that lesson. Well, it's a new world out there. It changes every day.
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