Monday, September 22, 2014

Wants and needs

You know what I find annoying ? When others proclaim to feel sorry for me for things that make no difference to me. Things like I don't have a smart phone or a new car. I don't care a wit ! Or perhaps I don't have the available monetary resources as others may have. Could care less. I just get annoyed when others feel as though I am deprived. How can you know my needs,wants or desires ? You can't ! Not unless I tell you that is, and believe me I will, given the chance. Do not presume to know my happiness.
I sometimes wonder if others say these things to convince themselves of their own happiness, or an attempt to dampen mine ? There is a particular gentleman that shops at the store where I work. He often stops to tell me , " there is no shame in working at the grocery store ". What is that supposed to mean ? What is he trying to say? I find it condescending. Perhaps it is well intended. I say nothing in return, just smile and agree. Still it leaves me annoyed.
I do wonder why people would wish to impose their standards upon me. That is to say, what they feel is the minimum necessary for survival and happiness. I am perfectly happy with what I have. The acquisition of certain objects is not important to me, so why would you think it should be ?
I think this is all a result of confusing wants with needs. Sure there are things I want or would like to have. I wouldn't be human if I didn't. I have learned over the years that wants are not always a good thing. Some of the things we want, we are much better off without. It is the discovery of your needs that is important. Each of us are different in that regard.
I think the government is the most guilty of this thinking. Look at what the government provides as what they think is minimum standards. Certainly that must be the thinking, why would they want to provide more than that ? Review any government assistance program and this becomes immediately evident. Look at any government standard. Is it any wonder that so many remain on these government programs ? When the free stuff provides for more than what you can earn by honest labor there are those that choose that path. I can not expect others morals standards to be the same as mine. That is why I should modify the program and not attempt to modify the person. Adding additional programs and benefits is not an incentive to change for these type of people. I am not judging here just pointing out the obvious.
Well I got off track a bit there but it is all related. The bottom line is this, we are all responsible for our own happiness. No one can provide that for you. Sorting out wants from needs is the path that will lead you there. Do not allow others to dictate your happiness. Define that for yourself and pursue it.

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