Sunday, December 10, 2017

pro and con

 In the last few years I have discussed this issue of giving gift cards. I still remain, for the most part opposed to that method of gifting. It just seems like such a cop out to me. Certainly it is convenient  and requires little effort. It is also eminently practical. It also strikes me as completely impersonal, unless of course, you can place a monetary value on sentiment. What I mean by that is, how much is it worth ? Can our love or sentimental feelings be expressed in dollars and cents ? That is my issue with the whole concept of the gift card. That being said, my granddaughter has requested gift cards for Christmas ? A sign of the times ? I'm afraid it is just that and I'm not happy about the implications, still being Grandpa, I will fulfil her wishes as best I can, its' what I do. Yes, I know I spoil her, and all my grandchildren, and that can appear as a surrender of my principles. Look, even the Grandfather in Heidi had his soft side. I'm thinking it is just the gift card itself that bothers me, I didn't mind getting cash when I was a kid ! In fact I had one aunt in particular that always gave cash, in one of those envelopes from the bank that exposed the face of the president. I think the bank provided them free of charge back then. I don't know if they still do that, probably not. When was the last time you got a free toaster for opening a checking account ? But, I'm wandering a bit here. I don't have any of that money today but I do remember the aunt that gave it. Mission accomplished ? Yes, Aunt Minnie is memorable for her wealth, and little else, as I seldom saw her. Holiday relative, if you know what I mean. She was my fathers great aunt, but they traveled in different circles entirely. None of this is meant to disparage her in any way, it just the truth of the matter. I still hold a degree of affection for her, she was also generous and kind. She had no children of her own, whatever the reason was, and so had little experience. She gave myself and my siblings shrimp to eat and fancy crackers. She talked to us of current events and such. There were no toys at her house, all was neat and orderly. Aunt Minnie would have embraced gift cards, of that I am certain. Oh, by the way, my sister was named after her. Her real name was Mildred but she went by Minnie, perhaps a nod to her humble beginnings in life. Aunt Minnie married well as the saying goes.
 Now this idea of gift cards bothers me a bit simply because the monetary value is, of necessity, exposed.  That's not to say any gift I  purchase couldn't easily be researched ( googled ) and the price known instantly. I just don't think anyone would do that, I mean, to what end ? Selling it on ebay maybe ? Well, whatever, I just don't like that. I was talking about this with my sister, yes the one named after aunt Minnie, as she is contemplating gifts cards as well. As we chatted she asked what value amount I thought appropriate. I had to answer with, it depends upon the person. The reason isn't what you think though. The reason has nothing to do with how much or how little you value that person as a friend, relative or close family member. No, the value of the card has to be appropriate to the age of the person receiving it. Well that is, if you want to make an impression it does. You see value amounts are not what you see on the face of the bill or in this case, card. It really depends upon the generation you are talking about. Being a baby boomer a hundred bucks is still a good amount of money to me. If someone gave me a hundred I take that as very generous. If I were to give my granddaughter a hundred dollars she wouldn't be nearly as impressed. To her, that's a pair of shoes. She what I mean ? It is also dependent upon where the person was raised and their situation growing up. My brother only recently left Long Island, living in the Hamptons. When he moved to Florida he thought the housing was cheap, groceries were cheap and all of that. Then he applied for a job and found out the wages were equally as cheap ! It is all relative. Still to him, paying fifty dollars for lunch doesn't seem unusual but let me tell you in Greensboro Maryland that is extravagant ! All relative you see, by age, location and lifestyle. That is how you would have to buy gift cards. Might just as well buy the gift and put all that effort into selecting something yourself. I'd rather be thought of as giving terrible gifts than being cheap ! Yeah, I know it isn't how much the gift cost it is the thought that counts. I don't what to be thought of as cheap.
 I still haven't convinced myself it is alright to give gift cards. That is what this writing and discussing is all about. I keep trying to justify it. It is what they really want, I don't know what to buy them and all of the other arguments in the " pro " column. I just can't get past the " cons. " Fact is I think the whole thing is a con. I'm conning myself into doing something I oppose ! I am relenting to pressure. The pressure is, give'em what they want. The one item in the " con " column is that act of selecting the gift itself. You have to know the person, having been attentive to them throughout the year , to know what to buy. It requires thought. Yes, effort is required and it is through that effort that you can show your affection for that person. The proper gift will surprise and delight them because it is something that they either wanted or didn't know they needed. That is the magic in Christmas gifts. That is why the monetary value should be unimportant. That is why gift cards are just wrong. And so there it is, the cold hard truth. Excuse me while I go purchase those gift cards for the grandkids. 

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