From Hobo to Homeless

 I was writing the other day about Halloween. I was reminded of being a " hobo. " Well, after thinking about that for a while it dawned on me, Hobo's are a thing of the past. Now we have the homeless. What is the difference you say ? Well a hobo was more than willing to work. He, or less frequently she, didn't want a handout but would prefer to work just enough to meet their needs. We think of Hobos riding the rails. Yes, the real hobo was an itinerant worker. This " choice " if that is what it was grew mostly out of the great depression. Men moving from place to place seeking work. In some ways the " cowboy " as portrayed in the movies and the mountain men fell into this category. All three became somewhat romantic figures over time. I can't see that happening with the " homeless " of today. Are today's homeless cut from a different cloth ? No, I don't think they are it is just that they are current. I do think there are far more homeless than there were hobos but I don't base that on any solid data, just a guess. Of course the population is much larger now and housing and such far more costly. Today we tend to think of the homeless as mentally unstable or using drugs. We do empathize a great deal more with their plight. I do believe we label it as a plight but many homeless do not think of it that way at all. To them it is a choice. To some it is an expression of freedom. Only way to know is to ask I suppose. I have never known a hobo or a homeless person. This thought only came to me because of the Halloween costume thing. Red Skelton famously portrayed a " hobo " character and was beloved. Freddie the Freeloader was his name. He lived in a shack at the garbage dump. I'm thinking today there would be a big stink made and people would be offended. Oh the poor homeless man. Well Freddie the Freeloader did alright for himself. I'm thinking we ought to return to those days and just quit taking ourselves so seriously.
 A lot of this empathy we feel today is a result of being told we should empathize. In the not too distant past we would have been advised to " mind our own business. " In some ways that isn't bad advice. Good intentions are just that, intentions. Your intentions may not be the same as the person you intend to help however ! In all this political correctness of today how is it we can decide what is best for anyone ? What I'm saying is maybe some want to be homeless or what was once called a hobo. All that has changed is the terminology. Another big difference is the " homeless " of today are constantly being told they are victims. That wasn't the case years ago where they were offered help ( work ) and then pretty much left to their own devices.
 I'm not trying to say every homeless person wants to be homeless. I'm also not saying every homeless person is addicted to drugs and alcohol. There are many that have been thrust into the situation due to no fault of their own. I was just thinking about when did it go from Hobo to Homeless ? I think it was when the ability to travel freely around the country, whether that was by riding the rails or hitching a ride, quit being a viable option. Once the hobos established permanent camps they became homeless. Ironic in a way. They were itinerant and labeled " Hobos." They become stationary and become " Homeless. " I went trick or treating as a Hobo and it was adorable. If I went as a homeless person today the reception would be quite a bit different. Insensitive and politically incorrect ! What has changed ?

Conjecture

 I have decided to refrain from making political comments on Facebook. It will be akin to not swatting at mosquitoes,  they are irritating but it serves no purpose. They are not going away and I am not going to make them stop. I do value my friends, both real and cyber ones. I have said it, Mom said it, and her mother before her said it, one should not discuss politics and religion in polite company. It is sound advice and I should be following it. Facebook is a social network, that is how it is defined. We should all be sociable. That is the very reason I begin each morning on Facebook with a Good Morning to all. As Sheldon Cooper  would say, it is the social convention. So from this day forward I will not engage in posting my political leanings. It will be difficult for me but I must try.
 Everything evolves over time. I was remembering the days of the " chat rooms. " That was back in the infancy of the internet. I hadn't heard anything about chat rooms in quite a while so I googled it. To my surprise I found out that they do exist but their purpose is quite different. According to the article I was reading the chat rooms are the " seedy " places of the internet. It is those areas that law enforcement monitors most closely for illicit activities. I can remember having quite the pleasant conversation with total strangers. I was always very careful to not reveal too much information of a personal nature and never took what others where saying too seriously. I was never, ever, tempted to go and meet anyone I had met on the internet, that always seemed like a crazy idea. I do know that it worked for some people however but the other stories I heard about gave me more than pause, they put the brakes on completely. Remember when we talked on there and used " screen names ? " They were like CB handles for those that remember that. I never really had one I just used my name. Never could decide upon a screen name or handle I thought was " cool. "
 I have noticed the changing atmosphere of Facebook. It is less " social " than it used to be. The postings are becoming a bit more caustic. I'm convinced it is because of a basic human desire, to be noticed. We all like attention and I'm certainly no different than anyone else. I am just as guilty. That is why I will try to refrain from the political stuff. I'm quite certain I will not change anyone's mind or political affiliation. I'm equally as certain that eventually I will make someone mad ! There really is no need to stir that pot. To be truthful I certainly hope no one is basing their decisions upon what is posted to Facebook ! Psst, some of it is not true. Yes, I know but everything on the internet is not always fact. Some of it is just conjecture. Truth is, most of what any of us say is just conjecture. The very reason we sometimes call someone a " know it all. " No one really does, know it all, and therefore what they say is conjecture. It is just that some conjecture more than others ! Some fail to contemplate before they conjecture ! Just imagine that.
 All social media, chat rooms, Facebook, twitter or whatever will change over time. I believe it is simply because it provides a method for people to hide. They can sit behind their keyboards or phones and just blurt out whatever rhetoric they choose with almost impunity. So much so that we have " cyber-criminals " and law enforcement is required to monitor the networks. These folks are well aware what they are doing is morally and ethically wrong. Doesn't make any difference though if you can effectively conceal your actions. That is the thinking anyway. A reflection of society and some would say, human nature. Humanity does seem to gravitate towards the unseemly. That is why we " legalize " those activities and call it social progress. It is an attempt to remove guilt. But I have wandered off the topic. I will no longer post political comments on Facebook in an attempt to keep it social just a bit longer. It won't be easy.
  

going in disguise

 With Halloween just around the corner I was thinking about costumes. I don't have any small children around anymore, the grandkids are too " old " for such stuff. I kinda miss the excitement of assembling the outfit. I was remembering what we used to do when we were little. Seems to me I was a hobo more than once. Mom would burn the end of a piece of cork and use that to blacken our faces. A stick and a bundle of rags on the end of it was a required piece of the outfit. Funny how we didn't have any mask on and today they preach about that. I vaguely recall wearing those plastic masks with the tiny eye holes though, couldn't see a thing ! Didn't matter much though, nobody was killed that I ever heard of. Pirates were also popular if I recall correctly. Fancy costumes were just not seen, and I doubt available, except at a professional costume shop. The style I recall were the "jump suit " kind.
 There was one Halloween in particular that I remember. My brothers and I were wearing burlap sacks that Dad had brought home from work. I'm not sure exactly what we were supposed to be but the sacks were, to say the least, distinctive. The distinction was not in appearance, they looked like any other sack, but in the way they smelled. You see Dad worked at a fish processing plant. The smell was unmistakable. Over time you did become somewhat " nose blind " to it, as they say today. Us kids didn't seem to notice it much anyway. I do remember that everywhere we went we got comments ! Mostly the comments were not very kind, but we still got the candy. The other kids shied away from us and we got quick access to the doorsteps. All the relatives knew who we were immediately. I just can't imagine how.
 I lived outside of town, down to northwest woods. There were few homes down there and they were spread out. Dad and Mom would drive us kids into town ( the village really ) were the rich folks lived and had the good candy. Also their houses were all in a row, up and down the street. Man, was that convenient, somebody must have planned it that way. You only needed to do a few streets and your bag was filled up. That was when you got full sized candy bars, popcorn balls and at some places little bags filled with candy. One year a lady, obviously wealthy as can be, had a big bowl of pennies on her table. You got to reach in and grab a handful ! Just once though, she was watching ! Another year I got a plastic piggy bank. Put a coin in the slot and he tipped his hat. Wish I had saved that bank now, it is a favorite memory of Halloween.
 Well, it is all different now. There is a time limit, two hours. There are also age restrictions in place. We didn't need those when we were kids. that was self regulated. It just doesn't seem to be as much fun as back then. Maybe that is just because I'm older now. Maybe it because it seems like a more dangerous thing as well. The candy is suspect and requires a good checking out. Maybe it is the fact that sex offenders are identified so they don't solicit children. It is a sad world indeed. Too much innocence lost I'm thinking. Halloween and children are meant for one another. Fantasy at its' finest. I can be a hobo and just get candy everywhere I go. Good memories.

Just nip it

 I'm sure you have seen it on the news. That school resource officer flinging the student to the ground. It is all over the media. As with most of this stuff we are only seeing a small portion of the incident. Now I'm not supporting what I saw let me be clear about that. I also am not " outraged " by it. This student was obviously " acting out. " What troubles me more is the public reaction. The police officer has been suspended. What about the student ? Was she also suspended ? No mention of that in the news reports that I have seen. I did see an interview with one of the other students that said he couldn't even watch, it was so bad. Yeah right, like he wouldn't be standing on the playground cheering if it was a fight among students. I didn't just fall off the turnip truck. It does sound good for a media soundbite however. Can a lawsuit be far behind ? I'm going " all in " that there will be.
 The question here is, what should the officer have done ? Really, to me, the question is why do we even have to have a school resource officer ? When I was in school we didn't require a police presence to keep things under control. And now they are calling in the FBI !
 The answer is of course, discipline. and the enforcement of it. Just what is discipline ? The dictionary says it is training someone to obey the rules or standard of conduct. It is taught by using punishment. So then the question is, how to punish those that refuse to obey or conform to the accepted rules ? Is it to be accomplished merely with reason ? Very difficult when a person chooses to be unreasonable. Should force ever be employed ? That is the quandary, is it not ?
 Just how did we get to this point ? I have talked about this before and my feelings are unchanged. I believe you have to do like Barney Fife would recommend, " nip it " you have to nip it in the bud. That is to say, when the children are very small the training must begin. There is a fine line between fear and respect. I think children should be just a little bit " afraid " of their parents. Other adults should also be viewed with just a measure of fear. That "fear" will develop into respect as the child grows in age and maturity. Children must be taught with a standard. That is to say, receiving the same result each time an action is repeated. If they are allowed to " act out " and receive reinforcement for that action it will be repeated. It works with the positive as well, a lesson that seems to be forgotten. The concept of, let's litigate every response and action is just not going to work. In principle it seems like a fair and balanced system, and it is, as long as all parties are willing to litigate. Of course litigation is dependent upon " standards " and we must establish that standard first. If we do not teach, by discipline, to a " standard " litigation becomes impossible. The result is the situation you see in the news.
 I have no answer or fix for this problem. I wish I did. What happened with that child, well she didn't look like a child and was using a cell phone in class and apparently disregarding all orders and instructions from the teacher and subsequently the police officer, shouldn't have occurred. Neither party was right here. The degree of blame will be assigned by, you know it, litigation. Shouldn't be that way but that is what it is coming to with the world today. Something I say a lot is a simple truth, you can't legislate morality. We keep trying to do that however. I would add now that you can't litigate discipline or respect. Litigation follows incorrect actions. The solution ? Nip IT ! Just nip it. The incorrect action that is. Why did man write laws in the first place ? To establish a standard, that's why. Proving who is right ? Not necessarily, but determining who acted within the established standard.
 Yes, back in the day we didn't need the Police or the FBI we had something worse, The Principle ! The very title tells it all. If your actions were reported to the principle, or God forbid, you were sent to his office you knew the end was near. Detention was about the best you could expect. A phone call to Mom or Dad and a suspension hung before you like a death sentence ! Yes, he or she was the principle but Dad and Mom were the wardens ! Fear or respect ? Did it matter ?

What I'm seeing

 I posted on my Facebook timeline a small description of an incident my grandson was involved in. He was the referee during a recreational soccer game when a parent became irate. This " lady " and I use that term loosely here, cussed at him, called him a name and finished up by giving him the middle finger. Very classy behavior. That posting received a number of " likes " as a sign of support. It also generated some comments. The grandson is fine and it doesn't seem to bother him. His major concern was the feelings of this mothers' son. He said how embarrassed that boy must have been. Needless to say I am quite proud of him and the way he handled the situation. The parent was ejected ! And he stood his ground on that decision.
 I know that this sort of thing is nothing new. Sadly, it is an all too often occurrence. Now I can understand emotions running a little high when you feel your child is being unjustly singled out. I can understand the raised volume and presenting your argument and displeasure. What I don't understand is the choice of language and gestures. My grandson is 14 years old. This lady's son was about 11 or twelve. Just what kind of example is she showing ? I have said it before and I believe it is worth repeating, children are like mirrors, they reflect what you show them. This lady had to be escorted from the field before the game could continue.
 I do believe that some of this is a reflection of society today. Especially so the language. When we use certain words and terms regularly they become habit. Then when our anger is aroused we resort to using those same words ! When I was a child this sort of thing happened but the language didn't fly like that. Men tempered their choice of words in front of the ladies and children. Ladies didn't use that type of language at all, at least not in public. But somewhere, at some point, all of this became " acceptable. " It somehow became a symbol of freedom and equality. Yeah, right, like using coarse and vulgar language and gestures is a sign of maturity. I know it leaves me impressed. ( sarcasm )
I know it is cliché but back in my day if someone had behaved in that fashion the other parents at the game would have intervened. This lady would have been silenced rather quickly by her peers. In another reflection of the times it also wouldn't be wise to do so. You could get yourself shot these days ! Well that may be a bit extreme but you know what I'm saying. One does have to be a bit more careful now. The reactions of other so called " adults " can not be relied upon. If you don't get physically attacked you might get sued. I'm betting there are lawyers for that.
 I have written about this stuff before. In our modern times, I lived in the stone age just ask my grandchildren, there are so many more organized activities for the kids. This is especially so in sports. Now we have soccer and lacrosse, two sports that were not all that popular back then. The teams are organized and funded. Uniforms are in proliferation and there are coaches galore. We hand out trophies, to almost every team or person participating, and take the whole deal a great deal more seriously. It is all of that, that also creates the situations we are seeing. We are losing sight of the goal. The goal is not to win the game but to teach the children how to succeed in life through the lessons of sports. I just read recently a blog written about being a coach. The article points out how it is far more important to teach a child how to lose, with dignity, than to just win. The blog says much more than that and addresses the issue far better than I am here.
 Well it is the world we live in and we should teach our children to live in that world. That doesn't mean we can't show them alternatives to the choices being made. What is it that Mom used to say ? " If everyone else was jumping off the bridge, would you do that too ? " So if everyone else is yelling, cussing and gesturing should you do the same ? Making the correct decision isn't always easy or popular. We need to teach our children that and the best way is by example. I certainly don't like what I am seeing !

http://karrickdyer.com/2015/10/21/i-never-thought-it-would-end-this-way/ 

That is the link to the article I mentioned. I believe it should be required reading for any coach or parent of any child playing a sport. Mr, Dyer is to be commended for this effort in writing. I hope the link works but if it doesn't it is still worth the effort to type in manually, trust me.

Ranting and raving

 Are we never to " grow " up ? I really wonder about that these days. With the things I see and hear these days from what should be " adults " I can't help it. I see the way they dress, in public, and the nonsense that comes out of their mouths and I am appalled. Time to grow up people ! Time to face reality and the real world. The things that were " cool " twenty years ago are just that, cool twenty years ago. Today they, and you, just look foolish.
 I understand there is a whole industry built around this. The array of products is simply amazing. You name it, you can buy a pill or a procedure to fix it. When you start to receive warnings like, check with your doctor before doing this, perhaps you should reconsider your priorities ! Look, I'm just sayin'. I'm not saying you should just sit on the couch and do nothing, but really you are not twenty years old anymore !
 What I find even more troubling is this supporting of things that are just juvenile. If I support certain things that makes me current and hip, right ? Oh, that's right we aren't Hip anymore,  is the preferred term now " relevant ? " Older folks that cuss a lot, make crude references to sexual activities and smoke weed are the " in thing. " Maturity is a bad word. Maturity implies a week and feeble mind and body. No longer is the wise old sage respected. Some good examples of this are the current crop of politicians. Do they look or act mature ? Not in my book they don't. Those reporting the news are the same way. Hey, when Walter Cronkite said something, you listened. Who are we listening to now ? See my point ? That was because Walter had grown up ! He was a mature elder statesman whose opinions were respected.
 We need to stop living in this fairy tale world of everything is cool man ! Whether you like it or not there are, or at least should be, certain standards to be met. It isn't always a pleasant thing this making of decisions, but it is a necessary thing. If we continue in the fashion that we are, our society will collapse. I can't see any way of sustaining it without reigning in some of this liberal nonsense. Grow up ! Yes, you have to work for your money. Yes, some people make more money than you ! You know what ? Some people are smarter and better looking too, get over it ! Growing up means learning to live with what life has handed you. Dignity and grace cost nothing ! I'm hearing a whole generation of " whiners. " Get over it and just grow up. All I hear about is fairness and equality. Guess what ? Life isn't fair and not all things are equal ! Shocking isn't it. Deal with it.

do not be deceived

 Do you believe what only can be proved ? That is something I hear a lot of people professing these days. If it can't be proved, it doesn't exist. I have to disagree. Take something we all experience, love. Can love be proven ? If so, how ? Is love proven merely by compliance ? That is to say when the other person does everything to please you. When they make a sacrifice on your behalf, is that love ? It is said that God is love. Does God do everything to please you ? Is it God's fault when things go wrong ? Does that mean that God doesn't love you ? Each of us have free will to do as we please. Each of us are also accountable for those choices. If we are pleasing to God does that mean we will get " stuff " we want from God ? No, I don't believe it works like that. Does not the Bible say, you reap what you sow ? 

Galatians 6:7 Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap.  I believe that you will "reap" your rewards in the next life. The things that you sow today are in the book of life and shall be used in judgement. That is what is being talked about here. Our lives are but fragments in time, light in the firmament. What is the reward ? The Bible tells us of heaven. A place with no pain, sorrow or fear. Most of us picture heaven as a place to be with those that have gone before us. We all want to return to the time of life on this earth because it is all we understand. Life here can be proven. At least that is what our senses tell us. Our senses can deceive. The first words of that verse say just that, " be not deceived " and I find that telling. Is this verse telling us not to laugh at God because his existence can not be proven with physical evidence, the very thing most atheists seem to do. It is not an unusual thing for anyone to laugh at something they do not understand or something they fear as well. Nervous laughter may belie confidence and courage.

 The big question to be answered here is a simple one. Does love only exist when your expectations are met ? When you feel like your expectations are not being met, on a timetable to suit you, is that a sign of failed love ? Is that the cause of so many failed relationships ? It is not the failure of love but rather the failure of the individual to recognize love. We can not "detain" love that is lost either. We must let it go as a bad seed. It is a part of the " sowing " process. Just as a farmer selects his seeds  so should we select ours. Our words and deeds are those seeds. The crop will not ripen in this life but rather the next. Love is the seed and should be guarded jealously. Do not randomly scatter your love but place it only in trusted soil.

 Can any of what I say be proven ? NO, I suppose it can not. Does that make it false ? Again, no it does not. If we expect our rewards too quickly we will be disappointed. In truth we should expect nothing in return. That is love. Love is freely given, a gift. It is to be accepted that way as well. Love is nothing more than a promise. Can a promise be proven ? Only when that promise is fulfilled. I believe it will be and I shall reap whatever " crop " is my due. It is up to me.

I've got time

 We may live with sorrow, whereas grief becomes intolerable. It is my thinking that as we age we learn to live with sorrow and it is that sorrow that molds our countenance. In this usage countenance being the ability to admit, or accept as possible. When we lose those that we love and knew we go through a grieving process. The end result of that process is sorrow. It never leaves us. It is that realization that creates our countenance. Some of us become grumpy old men, mad at the world and upset by our loses. For others we become calm and compassionate, understanding the loss as inevitable. Sorrow becomes the burden we bear, and we carry it with dignity and grace. Our days of bluster and rage left behind and replaced with introspection. We begin to see the importance of life, and accept the inevitability of death.
 I was thinking about this as I looked at a picture. It is a picture of my brother, fishing. He has been gone almost a year now and I miss him. Looking at that picture however I can hear his voice and know his manner. From that I was reminded how many times this happens. It is not always preceded by a picture, sometimes a word spoken in a certain fashion or some other little thing triggers that memory, The truth is it triggers sorrow. I feel the sorrow of his passing, I feel the sorrow of not being able to " see " him. With that trigger, sorrow is released. It is vented off so as not to cause the return of grief ! Grief is sudden and explosive. We must learn to temper our grief, tame it into sorrow.
 I don't believe we ever become used to the loss. We do learn how to live with it, live with the sorrow. We relish in the memory of that person. We appreciate the  gift that they truly were in our lives. It has been said many times, you don't know what you are missing until you don't have it anymore. The constants in our lives do change over the years and become fewer. I think that is why older people can become confused, too many changes. I find myself wanting to rebel at times and at others I want to surrender. The fact is there is nothing to fight and therefore no requirement to surrender. The world turns and life moves ever forward. I carry the memories of those I have known within me. They are not gone really, just waiting patiently for me to catch up. They have time and so do I !
  

wants and needs

 I usually write about whatever comes to mind. There are some things I reconsider and do not put out in this public forum. I do not want to hurt anyone's feelings or sound overly judgmental. I find that I can be that way without even realizing it. I guess that is what we all say when we discover that.There are things I might say that could be taken wrong. That is always a problem and a consideration. When presenting an idea or concept contrary to the prevailing opinion, it is a risk. It is doubly so when the idea or concept you are presenting is one that you are not necessarily committed to, just offering an observation upon.
 The thing on my mind falls into that category. What I am thinking about is the proliferation of the " go fund me " accounts being opened. It comes off to me as " asking for a handout " and I find it unsettling. I suppose it is because of my upbringing. I wonder if it is a generational thing ? There are questions surfacing in my mind about the whole concept. On one hand I feel like it is a form of begging and on the other " it can't hurt to ask. " The thing is, is it a charity ? Do I want to present myself as a charity case ? I read a little about it, very little, but the funds received are not taxable. That is because they are considered " charity" and therefore exempt. So, the federal government calls it charity. The official website calls it " fundraising. " In my mind a matter of semantics only.    Semantics is something we play with a lot these days.  They can be " offensive. " Well almost everything is offensive these days but that is another blog. So, back to the issue at hand, go fund me. The central issue to me is, should I ask for charity ? Is that acceptable ? If it is, why are beggars held in such contempt ? They are considered a nuisance and banned from some areas, why they are downright offensive ! How is this different from that ? I guess what I'm wondering is, does the cause make any difference to the action ? That is to say, I want, rather than I need ? But it is also true that " wants " are sometimes " needs " isn't that so ? If your needs are met it is fine to want more. How do we determine the difference between a want and a need ? Is it judged by what criteria ? The criteria you establish, or by my own ?
 These are questions I have about this practice of asking for money. And, make no mistake about it, it is asking for money. Doesn't hurt to ask does it ? Only in so far as your own conscience I suppose. As long as it does not violate that you are good to go. It is that last statement I find unsettling. Now I'm no " holy roller " or truth be told a very good Christian but my faith plays into all of this. The Bible doesn't specifically say it is wrong to ask for money, the Church sure does, and some even require it calling it tithing. It evens gives a percentage ! The " cause " is the worthiest of all causes. It is not in the Bible but I was always told, " God helps those who help themselves. " That was a way of telling me that self reliance was the best course of action. I was also told, be beholden to no man. It is better to be poor and free than to be beholden to anyone or anything. Pride cometh before the fall is also a phrase I heard often. There are different interpretations of what this Bible verse is saying but I take it literally. When you set your pride aside, you begin to fall ! That is to say your moral fabric is beginning to have holes in it.
 I, of course, can not speak to what is moral or not. That is an individual choice. I also have never felt a compelling need to ask. I'm not saying I wouldn't ask if the circumstances arise. I certainly hope they do not. I currently view this practice as just another sign of the times. Time changes all things it has been said and I am beginning to see those changes, That is the result of six decades of observation. Mostly the changes are superficial, trends and fads, but over longer periods societies themselves change. What is acceptable within that society also changes. It can be unsettling.
 I wrote this piece with some trepidation. I have no wish to hurt anyone's feelings  I do not mean this little essay as a form of judgement. I understand that not everyone establishes a " go fund me " account for themselves but rather others do it for them. I present this for examination only. I am neither opposed nor support the concept. I may decide to do it myself, I really can't say at this point. It would be nice if we never had to ask at all. That is the ideal.

Here we go

 I read , with some degree of admiration, of those that have purchased their Christmas gifts. They are wrapped and ready ! It certainly is a wise thing to do and I can see the benefits. Removing the stress from the upcoming holiday season does leave tine for full enjoyment of festivities. I'm certain bargains can be had throughout the year as well. It sounds wonderful.
 I consider this very plan every year. Every year I fail to execute it. With the way things change I am afraid to purchase a gift too far in advance. What is pretty cool right now may not be so next week. Also, the biggest impediment is I tend to give the gift way before Christmas arrives. I get excited about having found something I think the other person will be excited about and well, I can't wait. I admit it, I'm weak. Running around, at the last minute to find the gifts is also part of the festivities for me. I can't sing or act so I am not involved in any of that, a consideration those talented enough to participate in surely must consider. I've got time. I don't entertain much or go to Christmas parties so.
These are my " reasons " for not doing it. The are well reasoned and prudent. At least that is what I keep telling myself. Now a week or so before the big day I will be rethinking the whole thing. It is kind of a tradition. I'll be mumbling about I should have started earlier. I'll be thinking, " you were told, why didn't you listen, now the bargains you be missin, it's a cold night, no store in sight, looking for the last minute gift."  I'm so disgusted I forget to rhyme the last verse.
 I am getting better though. I'm thinking about it anyway. I do like shopping on the internet. I don't like crowds so it works great for me. I do hesitate on some purchases. I like to hold and examine the product and that is a problem. It doesn't bother me much with electronics or other " hard " products but clothing and such is a different thing altogether.
 The season is fast approaching. I've got to get started soon. Well, December is soon enough. Let's get through Thanksgiving first. Yeah, that's the thinking. Here we go again.  

just being me

 It is never too late to learn, but the later you do, the less time you have to enjoy it. Makes me wonder if you wouldn't be better off not knowing it at all ! It would be a sure way to avoid the , " if only I had " moments. Ignorance is bliss, isn't that what they say. Ignorance, by definition, is just a lack of knowledge, doesn't mean you're stupid. Maybe it is smarter to know less. OMG, I know too much ! I gotta quit this learning stuff. An old farmer once told me, the more you know the less you think you know. Took a while for the lesson to sink in but I understand exactly what he was saying. You keep learning to find out you don't know a thing.
 I would agree that it is never too late to learn. The thing is you can learn the information too late for it to be of use. That is what I am thinking about. Take something as simple as " dating. " Remember back when you admired someone but was afraid to even speak to them ? For a variety of reasons, that only made sense to you, you wouldn't just ask. Later on in life you learn that you could have asked and the whole world wouldn't have come to an end. That is only one example but there are many other similar things. The things I'm talking about are not exactly " regrets " just little life lessons. Regrets are different things entirely. Regrets stem from poor judgement, not a lack of information. To me regrets are those things that nag you year after year. Those things you just can't seem to let go of. Mistakes made that you cannot dismiss. Fortunately, I have few regrets. I do believe we all live with some degree of regret however, we are humans aren't we ? We make mistakes. It's understandable. Just not always excusable in our own mind.
 Learning how to live take years of practice. It truly is a process and comes in stages. As Shakespeare, and later on Elvis said, " each of us must play our part " and learning your role isn't easy. We begin as understudies. At first I just wanted to be like Dad. Subsequent to that I have tried to be many things and wound up just being me. What a lesson to learn. Kermit the frog sang a song called , it isn't easy being green and in that song he says it isn't easy being me. Testify frog ! Sometimes I can't hardly stand myself. How others, especially my wife tolerate me I'll never know. Probably one of those things I shouldn't learn either !

Aim high

 I always play to win. That isn't to say I am a sore loser but being a loser is something I try to avoid. I do not cheat and insist upon fair play. I am not overly competitive, in my opinion. Still, I want to win, every time. With every game I play, I want to win. I have a hard time understanding why anyone would play just for fun. Isn't the fun in winning ? Sure the game play can be amusing and enjoyable but the point of playing is to win. I find no fun in losing. I have discovered that that philosophy carries over into my everyday living. I like to be right about whatever it is I am doing. I admit I sometimes avoid things I know I am not very good at. You will never see me trying to draw or paint a picture. I'm terrible at that. Fact is, my efforts in that department are laughable. I stick to what I feel I can accomplish in a fairly competent fashion. I need to feel " competitive " in whatever field it is. I believe I could read poetry but know I can't sing. I'm not very musical at all. I played with the guitar for about thirty years but never really became proficient at that. Given enough alcohol, consumed by the audience, and I could manage a sing a long. That's about it.
 I was thinking about this character trait of mine when I saw a " virtual " friend has gotten her book published. I can't imagine the self confidence required to attempt that feat. Don't misunderstand me, I think it is a wonderful thing and I admit to feeling a tinge of jealousy. I enjoy writing and think about writing a book one day. I just don't believe I would ever have the nerve to offer it to a publisher. To receive a rejection would be to lose. If I don't play, I can't lose, see the logic there ? Taking chances they call it, and I understand that. I have heard all the words of encouragement and all of that, still not jumping out of the plane ! Is it fright ? Yes, I suppose the fear of rejection is what you would call that. I just feel like I do not have a realistic chance at winning. Ever look up the statistics on getting your manuscript published ? I have and they ain't good. And paying for it to be published yourself doesn't count in my reckoning. Isn't that like cheating ? Fear; more like a realistic expectation I would say. I hate to lose.
 I write as a form of therapy. By writing this and sharing it with others I have to confront it. Now, it is out there in the light of day. Those that are close to me already know all of this. The person I am trying to convince is myself. Trying to accept that " losing " is an acceptable outcome is a very difficult concept for me to grasp. I'm not saying I always win but I try to be competitive. Just doing it for the fun of it ? It is a lot of work and effort writing a book or anything else for that matter. It's not fun unless it is later appreciated. What's the odds ? See, I always play to win. Losing is not motivational to me,winning is. I do enjoy the anticipation of the contest but I want to win. No fun in entering a contest you feel you have no chance to win. In this situation I feel like I have only one shot ! I just can't seem to pull the trigger. I keep thinking I am aiming a bit too high.
 This narrative was written not to garner encouragement. Having read it over that is what it appears to be. I am writing this for a reason I really don't understand, or want to admit, not sure which it is. If I were to write a book I would want it to say something meaningful. Words of substance is what I seek. They should be entertaining as well. I think the truth is, if I had anything published at all I would be ecstatic. Another truth is, things have always come fairly easy to me. Was that the result of not taking chances ? If that is so why would anyone subject themselves to doing things the hard way ? I know, the road less traveled and all that. Well, maybe it is time to blaze a new trail. Probably not though. Thanks for listening.

Waiting on a breeze

 I like to use sailing metaphors. I guess it is because I grew up on an island and spent twenty years in the Navy. It somehow seems appropriate. Perhaps it s a bit cliché but I enjoy it so what the heck. If I could pull it if I would talk like a pirate ! Of course that speech is just stereotypical and mostly Hollywood. That doesn't matter though, I am not known to be politically correct. I have been accused of being " insensitive " in certain areas. I just say I tell it like I see it.
 I mention all of this as an introduction to the following statement. I feel like I am in the doldrums. I have been in this area for some time now. A few days or a week is a long time to remain so. The thing about the doldrums is there is nothing to do but wait. Eventually the weather will change and a breeze blow up. When that happens you can move on. Until such time all one can do is wait and perhaps " paddle, " With a large ship that isn't possible. In the days of sailing ships they would launch their rowing dories and attempt to tow the boat. That is how desperate you can become in the doldrums. You become willing to try anything, just to be doing something.There is nothing necessarily wrong with being in the doldrums, better than being in a storm anyhow. The thing is I am anxious to continue the journey. I'm not certain of the final destination but adventure awaits, I'm sure of that. There are places to go and things to do. The sails are up but no wind is forthcoming. I am not wishing for a storm, just a gentle breeze will do. A fair wind as the sailors of old would say, and a following sea. Nothing is wrong, per se, I'm just waiting.
 I realize that life isn't all smooth sailing and adventure. The journey has many legs and charting a course is not easily accomplished. One does have to change the course often due to varying conditions. Storms can be exciting but dangerous. Sometimes we run with the tide, fast, but can also be difficult to navigate. Other times we just sail along, oblivious to the horizon, watching the skies. Sailors look to the sky to foretell conditions. Red sky at night, sailors delight, red in the morning sailors take warning. Gathering clouds foretell a storm. It is said that sailors are superstitious souls and I would agree. That makes me wonder, what has caused this set of circumstances ?  That is what superstition is all about. Attempting to explain the unexplainable. Is it something I have done ? Could be something I failed to do as well. Perhaps I should whistle. Whistling was considered a bad thing in the days of sail. At least whistling on ship was. One could " whistle up a storm " and create a regular maelstrom ! Not worth the risk, in most cases. It could be as simple as leaving the house and reentering with the right foot. Sailors would never board or disembark a vessel with their left foot first, bad luck mate ! Always step on the gangway right foot first, same leaving.
 When in the " doldrums " it is best to just do nothing . You have to wait it out. Patience is the key here, don't do anything foolish. Any move you make may bring disaster. Attempting to tow the boat is the last resort. It is best to use this time to repair and reflect. We all need a break now and again. I am growing impatient however and wish to sail on. This sailor isn't ready to set the anchor just yet. I am not " floundering " which a totally different thing altogether but becalmed. I'm just waiting on the breeze. 

replacing discontent

 I have a friend of mine that posted she was looking for her passion. I understood what was inferred. Just what is it that you are passionate about ? Some of us have many passions while others only one. Flighty to obsessed. That is the range of passion. In Christianity the passion refers to Jesus final days. It stems from the Greek word, to suffer. We have all heard of those that suffer for their art or occupation. There are passionate people and there are those that are stoic. I don't think we find our passion, it finds us. We just have to be open enough to accept it. Society is the biggest barrier to that That is not to say it is a bad thing, some barriers are necessary. For me, I find that passion is best when shared. I suppose you could say it feeds my ego and boosts my self esteem. Doing something just for the sake of doing it is a concept I really don't understand. All action should have some result. Is it that my personal expectations are too high ? I am seldom satisfied with the results I achieve. I require others to tell me it is good before I am satisfied. I'm sure the head doctors would have an explanation for that.
 Do we , or should we, all have a passion ? I don't think it is a necessary requirement for happiness. And it is happiness that we all truly seek. If we are happy, we are satisfied. Problem is with the defining of happiness. Are you only happy when you feel you have satisfied societal expectations ? That is to say, you feel you are smart enough or attractive enough. Can you entertain others ? Is it that desire that drives you ? Acceptance, in a word is what I'm talking about. Self assured is another way of putting it. Self assurance can lead to arrogance however. There is a balance there. The higher we place ourselves on the pedestal the greater the inevitable fall. That is something I believe to be true. No one can maintain a state of happiness twenty four hours a day. Searching for something ( passion ) to repair/replace our discontent is a never ending cycle. In my opinion to do otherwise is to be delusional. That is the stoic in me. I do have a passionate side. For me passion comes in small doses. The cynic in me will not allow otherwise. I just know it will end.
 I do think you become passionate only when you convince yourself. You must believe it, wholeheartedly and without compromise. The opinions of others must not influence that belief. It is nothing you can just settle on. You cannot " find " it. The discovery must come unexpected. In fact, I think true passion occurs when you are unaware of its' existence. When you can exercise that activity without care or fear of judgement. That is passion. Or is it ? Is passion happiness, or happiness discovered in passion ? Can one preclude the other ? Perhaps they co-exist. We do control our own happiness. Passion however, is discovered.

making too much

 I often hear the argument that big business is making too much profit. Walmart appears to lead the list. I hear complaints that the Walton family are billionaires yet pay only minimal wages to their employees. My question is, how much profit is too much ? How much are you allowed to make before you make too much ? Well, I hear that is different. What I don't hear is, how so. A business is in business to do what ? Make a profit ! It is really quite the fundamental principle behind any business. It is so basic it s not even mentioned in business 101. What is the purpose of working ? To make money. How much money should you make ? When are you making too much money ? You are making too much money when someone other than yourself sees your paycheck. Isn't that the truth ? Of course when you look at it, it isn't enough. Strange how that works.
 There are laws and regulations in place to provide a certain measure of protection for the workers. At first it was labor unions. There purpose was to represent the workforce and negotiate with the owners. We can see how that worked out, unions are out of control. And in those unions just who is receiving the major benefits ? Hint : it isn't the workers. Then the government established a minimum wage. This wage, not designed to be a living wage, it was to give the entry level worker some guarantees. I could go on but you get the idea. Now, I hear some wanting the government to limit the amount of profit a corporation or individual business can make ? The government is going to tell the business how and where to spend the excess profit ? Excess profits ? Is there such a thing ?
 What these people propose is an enforced state of " morality. " If I as the business owner make " too much " I should be forced to give it to the workers. It is only fair, right ? Yes, morally I should feel a sense of obligation and loyalty to my workers. Guess what, in the real world it doesn't happen that way. It is that way with most social injustice. I will say it again, you cannot legislate morality. Traditionally we relied upon on religious teachings to inspire that in others. Now, we insist on removing those same religious teachings from the government narrative but wish to impose them by law ! Well, except for the part of morality we find inconvenient or bothersome. Those we will label as " freedoms " and " rights " so as to justify them. Talk about being hypocritical.
 If your wage or salary is larger than mine shouldn't you be sharing ? What about your home or car. Bigger and better than mine, that's not fair. At what point is it too much ? Rich people ? How do you define that ? The only reasonable definition is having more than they need. Are you rich ? Depends upon how much you need doesn't it ? Can you tell me how much I need ? It is rather a problem isn't it ? Making too much money how crazy is that ? How much do you need ? Is what you have enough ? Maybe you want more, is that wrong ? Ask me; you make too much and should give me some.

Money and politics

 I occasionally make comments on some od the political posts. I do so mostly when I feel like a bit of controversy. It isn't much fun to just like things all the time. A little drama is good as long as no feelings are hurt. It is a bit like playing with fire though and can quickly get out of hand. I try to temper my remarks. I did just that yesterday afternoon and enjoyed a brief discussion. To some, I am that pain in the butt that shows up every now and again. I am too similar to some others and thus the friction. Only once. so far, has the friction increased to the point where I had to put the fire out, permanently. I do feel a bit of remorse for that but also realize it is something I should avoid,or someone. I am equally culpable in that situation.
 Now yesterday a person was stating that he felt we ( the voters ) had no say unless it was a tie. I understood exactly what he was saying. Many people complain about their candidate not doing what they want after they elected them. Reading that the obvious was brought to mind. Sure the majority of us do our research and listen to the candidates, ( hopefully anyway ) then form our opinion and cast our vote. We do so believing that candidate will vote our way. We have made that person our representative. The problem that follows, the one everyone complains about, is when that representative does not vote the way you want. You feel betrayed. But, did you tell your representative your opinion ? That is the big problem. Why should you believe that because I voted for you, you should then be able to read my mind ? You (we) need to tell our representative what our feelings are on the individual issues that interest us. It does no good to call and complain after the fact. It is our responsibility to remain informed and involved in the political process beyond just voting. That's why you vote. You know the old saying, you can't complain if you don't vote. Think about that statement. What is it saying ? Is it not saying what I just said ?
 Another big complaint in politics is about the money. Bernie Sanders says he will take the money out of politics. A noble statement and wonderful dream but totally unrealistic. Why is money tied to politics ? The answer is as easy as looking in the mirror. Those wishing for " things " to go their way are involved in the political process a great deal closer than casting a vote. Those folks maintain an active interest in the business of governing. It is these folks that " influence " and let their representative know what they want. They also let that representative know his or her job depends upon pleasing the electorate. If you don't care, implied by your silence, the representative will just make his own decision. Is that what you elected him to do ? The answer is yes, if you vote and then remain silent.
 I am not one to attend the town meetings and such. The case could be made that I am all talk. I wouldn't argue that point given my record of attendance. I am aware of the need to do so if I wish my opinions known. It is just that I am aware of what is going on and choose to remain silent. There have been no major issues that I take sides with. I am happy with the local government and the way they are conducting the business of the town. My son has been a commissioner for a number of years and so I hear the " scoop. " Now he is running for Mayor and so I am confident in the continued running of the town in a fiscally responsible fashion. And isn't that what everyone complains about ? Money in politics. Yes, and that is what politics is, money. Wants and needs are only satisfied with sufficient funding. It is nothing mysterious. And that is why there is money in politics. You can't get anything done without money !
  

private and personal

This morning I woke up feeing a bit cynical. I am aware of it but experience the feeling nonetheless. I am human after all. I'm not quite certain what triggered this feeling of cynicism, I suppose it is a series of events. Some things are a slow build and others just rise up. I'm thinking maybe it has something to do with breast cancer awareness month. All the little pink ribbons and the public expression of support. Of course I want a cure for cancer, all cancers, that is a no brainer isn't it ? This ribbon stuff all started because of an old song, Tie a yellow ribbon, Tony Orlando and dawn. I get it. The cynical part for me is who is wearing those ribbons or anything pink for that matter.
 It just seems to me that we have adopted the practice of publically supporting any and all obvious causes. Defeating cancer, anything to do with child and babies, gays, straights, bi-sexuals, and every other cause you can name has a ribbon. Why the need to display, tacitly voice, your support for these causes ? Especially so when the prevailing message of the day is, whatever I want to do is my business and you shouldn't judge me. Shouldn't we be keeping our causes to ourselves ? I hear a lot of people " supporting " this and that but see little in the way of action. The whole deal comes off to me as, look at me, look at me, I support whatever and that makes me a good person. Now that is being cynical. It comes off as a " profile " page in my opinion. By displaying the proper array of ribbons I can write my profile page to show what a compassionate and caring person I really am. Right, just like that high school picture you use for your profile picture is what you look like today. Yes, I'm a cynic this morning.
 A part of this stems from my own upbringing. I , nor my parents, were ever much given to public displays of personal feelings. If I chose to wear a cross I did so under my shirt. I dislike bumper stickers supporting any candidate. and I don't publically profess my love for anyone. All those things are personal and private to me. I don't believe I need to tell anyone I support curing any disease or protecting the welfare of children. Of course we should treat everyone with respect, don't need ribbons to remind me. Fact is if you need a reminder about something, it is probably because you tend to forget about it. What does that say about the importance or priority in your life and conscience ?
 Now with close friends and family the " rules " are different. In that situation I will confess all my feelings. That is the difference between public and private. I don't air my dirty laundry, as Mom would say, but wash it out privately. All these displays of ribbons and banners can cause unrest as well as promote unity. They are akin to flags, wouldn't you say ? Now some flags are " offensive " nothing new about that but the recent banning of displaying them is. Prior to that we relied upon common sense. Other examples ae wearing " gang " colors to school or I hear certain types of shoes. But walking around displaying all the " safe " flags, banners and ribbons is applauded ? That is cynical.
 Well, that is how I feel this morning. It will pass and I will return to the real world again. I do think that we should all explore what we feel and express it in some form. It is a release. It doesn't mean you are committed to it. I understand why some choose to wear the ribbons, the original intent. Raising awareness is a noble cause. Thing is, if you are wearing the ribbon you are already aware. If you are not, you either already know and chose not to wear it or haven't a clue. I have never ever asked anyone why they are wearing a particular ribbon if my life. I do not question others fashion choices. Bottom line for me, private and personal shouldn't be publically displayed.  

Making progress

 I went to McDonalds last evening with the grandchildren. Nothing new about that but I did notice the McDonalds does have new " menu boards " that are apparently flat screen televisions. Well I suppose the proper term is monitor. That is what you call a thing that looks like a television screen, can display pictures and text but isn't really a television at all.  It receives its' input from an outside source. Strange to us senior citizens. They took the guts out of the television and now only sell me the screen ? Need one of those for your computer. The televisions that they do sell have a " tuner " in them but I have no idea what it must look like. I never was a television repair man but knew what the tuner looked like. It was pretty cool, like a round comb. Don't bend it or let it get full of dust and dirt. Now televisions have numerous inputs for an array of other devices to plug into the  " screen " or  " monitor " whichever it is. Anyway, McDonalds has replaced the menu board with those.
 I enjoy the show American Pickers. I thought of them when I saw those new monitors and wondered what they did with the old menu boards. I'm betting the pickers would like to get their hands on them. They are not worth anything right now but surely in the future. I thought to myself maybe I have witnessed the end of another era. Will the old menu boards become a thing of the past ? Dominos pizza has a " monitor " on their wall to tell you when your pizza is ready. They also have an " app " for ordering. I can't help but think what will be left for future generations beyond that though. I mean today we still have a menu board that could be saved. What about a monitor ? You could save it but it would be blank. What's the point in that ?
 I did read an interesting article about a chalkboard in Oklahoma. Well actually two chalkboards. A school was undergoing renovations, getting the new whiteboards. The old chalkboards were being removed. As the workers removed the chalkboard they discovered a second set of chalkboards underneath. The writing was still on that second set, preserved there since 1917 ! Fascinating. See, that couldn't happen with a monitor. That is what I am thinking about. A few years back I bought one of those " picture frames " that displays your photos in a slide show. I thought it was pretty cool, a constantly changing picture. Now it sits in the bedroom, unplugged and unused. I suppose if I keep it the great grandkids or someone could plug it in in the future and see whatever pictures are stored in the memory. That might be a cool find. Speaking of which, I just read where they have discovered a picture of Billy the Kid, yes, thee Billy the Kid. It is valued at 5 million dollars. An old tin type.
 I do think that most of us are more aware of these changes today then we may have been in the past. There seems to be more collectors today. The difference today being collectors are looking at monetary values. In the past the old folks saved things with an eye towards reusing them. I know my grandfather didn't throw out much. He used the same materials over, sometimes more than once. Nowadays we don't think in those terms, throw it away and buy new. As we replace and upgrade our technologies the old stuff is just recycled, mostly taken apart and destroyed. The thing is, even if we saved our old stuff intact, it probably wouldn't work ten years from now, let alone a hundred. Quick ! How many of you guys could read a 3.5 inch floppy disc right now ? That is without going out to buy the tech to do it with ?
 Well I suppose that is progress. I couldn't help but think though, if there is a power failure I can't buy a burger because the cash register won't work. That has been so for quite a while now. Now, I can't even look at the menu ! Progress ? I don't know, a wood fired grill, a register with a crank and a hand written menu sounds pretty good now doesn't it ? I hear people even pay extra to eat by a fireplace. Ah, progress indeed.

" Conscience " decisions

 Shall we determine our moral standards by popular vote ? That appears to be the prevailing attitude. Regardless of any " scriptures " or religious instruction if we all like it, let's do it. It is our right to do so. It does make it easier I'll give you that. Well, it is easier as long as you can suppress your conscience. One method of doing so is to replace that " nagging conscience " with faulty logic. The old " judgement " thing. I don't have any right to judge you. We all judge each other everyday. It is how we determine our likes and dislikes. Judgement in and of itself is not punitive ! It is merely a determination based on personal experience, or belief concerning the actions of another. Judgement is an opinion. That is why they say the Supreme Court issues an opinion. In their judgement of the facts they have determined whatever.
 I believe boundaries must be established. I can see no other way of maintaining a stable society. Breaking those boundaries is called " revolution. " Yes, there are times and circumstances when that action becomes necessary. We must keep in mind however that a " revolution " merely establishes a new set of boundaries. A new order if you please. Revolution is not the complete removal of all boundaries. How to establish those boundaries is the question. I believe the Constitution and the Bill of Rights have done so, quite handily. Seems to be working thus far. And despite decries to the contrary this society was founded upon, and mostly adhered to, the Christian-Judeo tradition. That provides us with our moral compass. Without that, or attempting to ignore it when convenient, will definitely change the direction  of the society. The problem is, where are we going ? To just wander about, going and doing whatever is profitable or pleasing, is not a stable course.
 It just seems to me that the big issues of today are the " moral " ones. Freedom is being used as a sword to cut through the restraints of morality. Freedom means, I can do whatever I want to. as long as it doesn't harm you. Isn't that what we hear all the time ? I am not my brother's keeper. Doesn't matter what harm to the society may result, it is the individual that matters. That is the result of the " me " attitude. What is best for me. In this " society " the United States of America, the purpose was made clear by the opening line : " We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defense, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America. " Note it specifically states secure the " blessings " of Liberty. Blessings are defined as Gods' favor. Yes, God. It is quite clear to me. It begins with We, meaning the whole. What is best for the whole ? Strange how so many years later and a fictional character named Spock says pretty much the same thing. The needs of the many et al. My point here is that those moral standards were adopted with the founding of this country and should not, must not, be replaced by legislation. Legislation cannot delineate morality only define legal standards. The answer to a lot of today's " issues " are moral ones. Guns are killing people ? Is it not the people pulling the trigger that are doing that ? Imposing ones own brand of " morality " upon the majority is another example. I am not saying " alternative moralities " should be punished but certainly not the law of the land in contrast to the stated mission of the society ! One of which is to secure the " Blessings of Liberty. " Jesus did not condemn but said instead, " Go and sin no more. " Was that judgement ? Yes, he judged that you had sinned but provided an alternative. Don't do it again. Simple  really.
 I have direct ancestors that fought in the revolution. They also established the union that we all enjoy today. I am their " posterity " and hold a moral obligation to continue their cause. Is it perfect ? Of course not, but the principals are sound. The establishment of Justice ( that's judgement ) insure domestic tranquility ( keeping the peace ) provide for the common defense ( second amendment ) promote the general welfare ( capitalism ) and secure those " blessings. " I submit the later is the most important. Make of it what you will. The final line does say, that we do " ordain " and " establish " and that is clear enough for me.

Moods

I often find I adopt little themes in my life. They may last a day or two. Sometimes I am quite political, while other philosophical. I go from aging grandfather to feeling like the young man I used to be. All these lives are inside me. All of them want to roam free. We label these lives, moods. What mood are you in ? We may say he or she is in a mood, implying that it is a bad thing. The truth is the mood may just be different than what we expect from that person. In fact. I would say that is exactly it. Any departure from your " normal " state and you are in a mood. Each morning when I sit at this keyboard I subconsciously convey my mood. It is mostly what I'm writing about. Funny thing is, I think most anyone that knows me wouldn't consider me a moody person. Generally speaking I'm a happy go lucky kinda guy. I don't sweat the small stuff. That attitude was the root of my raising. I grew up with, making do and doing it yourself.
 A good portion of the stuff I write about concerns philosophy. I like to think about things, Some are sermon like in nature. They are all what I think at the time of the writing. I have found very few I would retract or change in any significant way. They reflect my many moods, moods that we all have. I believe the trick here is not to get stuck in a mood. That is when frustration sets in. Is that the cause of mental illness ? Are those with those issues simply stuck in a mood ? It could be, although quickly shifting from one mood to another has a name also, bipolar ! At least that is the term I hear used a lot these days, when I was growing up we just called those people " flighty. " Now, don't get upset I'm not making fun or taking mental illness lightly, I'm just sayin'. The drugs prescribed by the doctors are " mood altering " are they not ? I rest my case. In my younger days I have been known to use alcohol to alter my mood, and that option is still om the table, but seldom employed. I have found it to be a temporary fix and the results are a bit unpredictable. Depends on the mood I am in when administered !
 I do think we tend to want to " correct " others moods a bit quickly these days. We are too fast to diagnosis. We are also far too quick to judge ourselves and get lost in that scenario. Like any " illness " moods should be allowed to run their courses as naturally as possible. Masking the symptoms will not provide the cure. Learn to deal with it. You should experience the mood. Then having experienced that mood, think about it and what it was telling you. All of our moods are a reflection of our lives and situations. It doesn't necessarily imply illness. Life is like a voyage upon the sea, it isn't always smooth sailing. Any port in a storm ? Well the truth is you are better off at sea than tied to a pier. There are no pilings to smash into out in the ocean my friends, you need only weather the storm. Sunrise the day after a storm at sea is a beautiful sight. To look out upon the smooth waters and see blue skies once again.
 Strange isn't it ? If I say " you are in a mood " the implication is that it is a bad thing. If I say, " I'm in the mood " that implies quite a different thing altogether. Our moods are nothing more than states of being. Keeping an even keel is the secret. Take on only the ballast necessary, too much or too little cause a rough voyage. Baggage can have a similar effect. The day lies before us, make the best of it.

included in the catalouge

 Yesterday I finally mounted my old ships' bell. I got this bell from my dad. He had it on an old wooden boat named the Montauk. I wrote a story about that boat some time back and I do have fond memories of that vessel. There is nothing quite like a wooden boat, especially an old well seasoned one. The smells combined with the way they take the sea, well it is just indescribable. The bell is one piece of memorabilia from that and I also have the running light. That light is mounted above my desk and burns non-stop day and night. Originally it had a small kerosene burner inside, now replaced with a night light. I love the soft glow it puts off. The red and green lens indicate port and starboard, but remind me of right and wrong. Somehow in my mind tied to my father and his instructions. These two items, the bell and light meant something to him as he saved them. Now they are mine.
 I have been displaying my " antiques & mementos " gathered over the years. Most have been handed down and wound up in my possession by accident more than design. I feel a certain sense of responsibility for them. I want then preserved. More importantly, I want them understood. Each object has a story, a history behind it and that is the value in these things. None, that I am aware of, hold much in the way of monetary value, although they may one day. It is the sentiment that I want to convey, to move forward a generation. With some of the things I don't have much in the way of a back story, only speculation. The story was lost to time and no one taking an interest. That is why it is important to record those tales. The objects we acquire for ourselves or inherit from others will ultimately become the catalogue of our lives. The tangible things left behind as reminders. Can inanimate things contain a spirit ? No, I don't think so, but they can stimulate your own senses. They can move future generations as well, if the story is known. The story is the life.
 There are the things I use everyday that belong to me. I don't give those things much thought. They are stuck in a corner somewhere or in the attic. I wonder what items my children will " discover " and regard as a treasure. These objects may be large or small. I have great grandfathers tie-tac, a small treasure. Just a small piece of jewelry but one he wore often. I don't think you can choose what items gain that status. You can not " make " a memento hold value for another. One cannot instill sentiment into an object, it must grow on it's own. You can just never tell for sure what will endure. What items will be included in the catalog ? By displaying those things I hold close it is my hope that they be included. I try to make their stories known. The final irony is that I will never know. Or will I ? I'll just to wait and see.

Humility,heroes and discipline

 What's wrong with the world today ? I hear that question asked at least three times a day while at work. Mostly it is the older generation, of which I somehow have become a member, that asks. I know that it is a rhetorical question and no one expects a response. It is just the opening salvo in a string of lamentations to follow. I understand and empathize with the questioners. I have also given the question some serious thought and arrived at this conclusion. What is wrong today is there is a lack of humility. Just how this came about is another question entirely. I tend to place the blame where my Mother would, with that darn Dr. Spock and his baby books. Mom and generations of parents before her subscribed to the old adage, spare the rod and spoil the child. Their child rearing techniques relied upon discipline. Proper discipline fosters humility. That is because the individual feels they have done what was expected of them. There is no undue pride or sense of achievement is doing what it is expected. The evidence of this can be seen everyday. How many " professionals " are now routinely called heroes ? There was a day when it took a truly heroic effort to garner that description, now you just join the outfit. No matter what you have or have not done, you're a hero. Building self esteem they call it. You hear that a lot these days. Should be building discipline instead. If more of our children where more "self disciplined" due to having been raised in that fashion we just might have less crime and violence than we do. It is people who commit offenses against society, not inanimate objects. Is it mental illness ? A lack of discipline is more likely the cause in the majority of these instances. Humility is learned through discipline.
 Unfortunately somewhere along the line humility as a virtue has been set aside, dismissed as a bad thing. Now it all about aggression. Oh, we call it being assertive, but that is a fine distinction. Society in general has become more aggressive. That is the prevailing attitude in my opinion. Profane language and loud speech. People are demanding more and being more " assertive. " Gone is the art of gentle persuasion. It is all about " rights " and  " entitlements. " Yes, I can make you serve me, but not serve me well. I can not legislate respect any more than I can legislate morality. Each can also not be enforced by aggression. Compliance is better achieved through persuasion.
 There are some that would say what is lacking is civility. I wouldn't argue with that assessment either. Civility is tied to humility, is it not ? Being " civilized " means being morally superior. The only problem being defining that moral standard. Traditionally, in America that standard was established by our Judeo-Christian heritage. Is it a coincidence that the more we, as a society, reject those principles the less civilized we appear to be ? I think not. Humility is a cornerstone of that tradition. To be humble before your God and in turn before your fellow man. And so that is why I say, humility is what is wrong with the world today, a lack of humility. Man is no where near as smart as he thinks he is and no where near as powerful. We will be put in our place ! Just give it time. Did not Jesus say, " the meek shall inherit the earth. " The " meek " here are not weaklings or those that just follow along. In this context the word meek means, strength under control, or I would add discipline. Those that are true to Jesus and the Judeo-Christian traditions will inherit the earth. Those are the ones that will prevail, not the arrogant or aggressive.
 I didn't intend for this to turn into a bit of a sermon but wanted to explain my reasoning. I am bothered by the lack of discipline I see in the youth of today. Freedom they say, but they do not understand the meaning. True freedom is living with your conscience, not dismissing it. What is worse is attempting to replace that same conscience with " science. " Right, we have all the answers. Now that is a real lack of humility !

In context

 Words without thought have caused more harm than any devised. We all do it at times and it is always frustrating. The frustration lies in the fact that you can't just take them back. Words, once spoken, are unrestrained. That is the key to this dilemma in the first place, restraint. When we do not restrain ourselves from just blurting something out. I am guilty of just this offense. I have learned over the years throwing more words out there in an attempt to retrieve the first is fruitless. There are times when it is best to remain silent, patiently waiting. An opportunity to ambush those " words " will present itself in time. Until then, an uncomfortable feeling remains. Contrite is the word for that feeling. I meant no harm yet harm was caused.
 These words without thought hurt those closest to us the most. That is because they have come to value our thoughts. When we say something hurtful, it cuts deeper than most others. It is almost a betrayal. That is how it feels to the one being hurt. I have been on the receiving end and so draw on that experience in writing about it. The injury was unintended yet painful nonetheless. It can leave one questioning. What is worse it may instill doubt. Doubt implies a lack of faith. We don't want the ones closest to us to ever doubt us, or our sincerity. Words without thought can do that quicker than anything else I know. Thoughtless is a poison. Those words linger and build in potency over time. Kindness is the antidote. Kindness in liberal doses can counteract the words but will never remove the injury. Forgiveness may be forthcoming but that also does not remove the hurt, for either party. It is that , that is the frustration. Nothing one can really do. Speaking or acting without thought. The context is established by the receiver, not the speaker. It may not be what I intended to say, or convey at the moment, but it is what was heard. I didn't think it through. A thoughtless statement. It is a lesson we all need to remember, context is established by the receiver ! It is what you said and how you said it. Be clear and be thoughtful. Speak less and listen more. Words, use them sparingly and judicially.
  

Shifting colors

 I read a short article about a class reunion. There were just two left able to travel to this event. It was the class of 1940 from the U S Naval Academy. It was their 75th such reunion. It will be their last. The old Captain says he will not make it next year. He is suffering from cancer and the outlook isn't so great. These two old warriors, side by side, once again walking the grounds of Annapolis, living history. Both fought the Nazis' and the Japanese. Both lost many classmates and shipmates in that conflict. Both have survived. As I read that article I couldn't help but be moved. To walk, with that knowledge, and all those memories for what you know will be the last time, I just can't imagine. These two sailors, gentlemen and officers surely walk with pride and honor. Members of the greatest generation.
 In the article it says that we are losing our veterans of WW2 at a rate of about 500 a day. By 2036 it is predicted the last will have left us. Old wars and old sailors. I wonder what these two men must think of the way it all turned out. I say that because, for them, the end is truly close now. They both are keenly aware of that and surely the last reunion serves as a poignant reminder. Was it worth the fight ? That is what I would ask them, given the chance. In my experience warriors of that generation seldom speak of battle. They made the sacrifice due to necessity. A sense of duty, honor and service to their country was their motivation. It is what was expected of them and they answered.
 In 1936 when they entered the academy they probably wasn't thinking of war. The first world war, the war to end all wars, had ended just 18 years prior to that. Sure they were aware of Hitler and the Nazi party, but concerned, probably not. I'm sure as they progressed through the academy and the threat grew it was discussed. With the bombing of Pearl Harbor their course was set. Pun intended. The article mentioned how many were lost from that class at Pearl and during the subsequent battles. These men witnessed the loss of classmates, suddenly, violently and without compassion. And to now walk those halls so filled with tradition one more time, the last time, indeed the last voyage. My words are inadequate to express the sorrow and pride I feel. Seventy five years of reunions. Longer than I have been alive. It is time. And there is only one thing left to say to these two men. I stand at attention and render a hand salute to each. I wish for them " fair winds and a following sea. "
 For just seven months after graduation they knew peace. Then four years of bitter battle followed. Young men when it began, they aged quickly. Now, these two are all that remain able to make the voyage. Other classmates are still with us, but moored to their homes, unable to sail again. And now these two have heard for the last time, " underway, shift colors " that old familiar command. It is that phrase you hear each time the ship lifts anchor or loses her moorings. It signals the beginning of the voyage. The " colors " or flag for you landlubbers is lowered from the fantail and raised upon the mast. It is symbolic, a nod to the days of sail. The ensign, as it is called, is not lowered again until moored. Shifting colors it is called. It means a transition. Soon these two old sailors and shipmates will " shift colors " and embark again. Anchors aweigh my boys, anchors aweigh.

A subtle creation

 Memories are not made, they are created. As I looked at the pictures on my wall and the knick knacks of life upon my shelves that thought arrived. Each one holds a memory, a small moment in time captured. Some moments warm our hearts with the love held within, others may bring sorrow, for the memory itself. Each circumstance created was a combination of events. When we go on vacation or to a function we often say we are making memories but it isn't so. Memories are created, in a mysterious way, as a gift. That is why we " treasure " them so. You can't just make one whenever the mood strikes. The funny thing about these gifts is you may not know you received them until days, or even years later.
 What is the source of these gifts ? What force or forces created them ? I believe the primary source would have to be love. Love that was given unconditionally. The " gift " may have no more than a word or a pat on the back but arrived when you needed it. How else to explain the little incidents and nuances in life that remain with us. When we say, I remember, we are recalling the creation of a memory. Creation is always remarkable. One could say it is awe inspiring and that makes it memorable. So too memories are created by extreme sorrow and anger. These memories cling to us and sometimes haunt us. They do serve a purpose. These memories create a shade to the bright light of love. Love can blind us and give a false impression. They are unpleasant but necessary to provide that balance.
 I wasn't made either, but created. Each of us are created. The miracle that is life. Is it merely biology ? I think not. Man has always sought to know the creator of this earth, but more properly who or what created life itself. But you say, we can make life in the laboratory, in a test tube. It has been done. Yes, man understands the biology of life and what sustains it. That doesn't explain life however. That doesn't explain the " soul " of man. The soul can not be denied, even by the strictest scientist. Can we measure the soul ? Can we measure love ? Can we make a memory ? The answer to all three questions is , no. Yet we cannot deny their existence. All are created. All are the work of the creator, whomever you conceive that to be.  

A little explanation

 It is one thing to wake up and realize that you are sixty two but when you start to think about others, it hits you. I am the youngest of four. Each of us were born about two years apart. So, my sister, whose birthday is this week will be sixty four. My brother turned sixty six in September and the eldest brother would have been sixty eight. Sadly, he left us last year. He is just waiting for the rest of us though. Time is a funny thing, how it always keep moving. Oh, it does pause for just a moment every now and again  and it is usually not a good thing when it does. It is only good when we cause that stoppage. Those are the moments we remember. As we age, move forward in time, the greater blocks of time we are able to stop, or if you prefer, remember. That is true for the majority of us anyway, barring medical conditions. I find myself thinking in decades now, instead of years. It gets increasingly difficult to realize that you are aging. It is shocking to see your contemporaries sometimes, those you haven't seen in a while. My, how they have aged. Even though it is the same, or maybe just a year or two different than your own, it just sounds older ! Wonder why that is ?
 It is said you are only as old as you feel. That holds some truth and I understand the meaning. Fortunately I am still quite ambulatory and try to stay current. Your age, no matter how old you feel, can be an impediment to being too current. That is true in dress and speech. There is another statement that I understand as well, there is no fool like an old fool ! I try not to look foolish. First impressions do count. The trick lies in finding your ground, your stronghold. Some people find eccentricity to be their strong point, while on others it just comes off as crazy. It lies in the choice of the decade. I'm a nineteen sixties kind of guy. Not the progressive side of that decade however, I wasn't all into the peace and love thing, I was a stalwart supporter of the more traditional things, Truth is, I wanted to be Dad. That was, as long as I could still be " cool " doing so. In the eighties and nineties I lost a little focus but didn't wander too far. Made some bad choices and made some great choices during those decades. If you were going to make a trailer to my life, those decades would provide some interesting scenes. The movie is not over yet, there are scenes yet to be filmed.
 For the most part I forget about my age. It isn't a concern to me. There are reminders that pop up however. Like yesterday, I was talking with a young girl that is a cashier at the store. She saw my hat and said, " you were in the Navy ? " I said sure, but I retired in '93. She says, 1993 ? Well, of course it wasn't 1893 ya know. Then she adds, I wasn't even born yet. Now that made me feel old ! I have been retired longer than I was in the Navy but I didn't point that out. It was then I realized my own sons will be forty this year ! There it is that time thing again, always moving.
 When I was a kid, and later as a young man, Mom would often say, " when are you gonna grow up ? " Well, I guess I have but don't know when that happened. My wife would disagree but that is a different topic. I did grow up in the sixties, at least that decade was my strongest influence. I have pretty much adopted the moral and social standards of that time. It is at my core. I have no desire to change that. Yes there were things that needed changing and I believe progress has been made. I also think an " overcorrection " has taken place. We need to return to the basics once again. Personal accountability lies at the core. That's all I can say about that. A little more focus on what " we " are doing and less worrying about what everybody else isn't doing. When we were children, little children that is, we were that way. Then we started shifting responsibility to others. Everybody else was doing it !
 Well this turned into a bit of a rambling mess. I hope you found something amusing or interesting in these paragraphs. Forgive me, I'm getting old ! It is a convenient excuse.


 

Just a whisper to the warden

 Yet another child has become the victim of collateral damage in the city of Baltimore. Some " thug " shooting at four other " thugs " missed and shot a nine year old in the leg while she was playing on her porch. Just about a year ago, in that same neighborhood, a five year old was shot and killed in the same manner. The mother of this recently injured child was on the news looking for answers. She said, I was told it took a village to raise a child, where is the village ? I understand her grief and frustration. In response it struck me that the " village " has long been torn down. Now, even the smallest neighborhood is like a city. How did this come to be ? That is a question for the sociologists to answer. All I know is this, I grew up in a village. I didn't live in the village per se, in fact I lived three miles north of that, but that didn't matter I was raised by the village.
 The village was inhabited by correction officers, we called them adults back then. These officers could and would correct your behavior immediately, anytime, anywhere and without prejudice ! They would also report any infraction to your " warden " where further action would be taken. The rules and regulations were well known and publicized. There were no hidden cameras or tweets, there were actual " eyes " on you. Reported incidents were assumed to be true when received by the warden. It was up to the accused to prove their innocence. That was a very difficult thing to do. Mostly that was true because the reports were true ! In the rare case of an incorrect reporting you were punished, that was immediate, but when your innocence was proven, you got a " I'm sorry. " It was well established that the " corrections officers " seldom, if ever, made a mistake. The warden placed complete trust in those people. That trust was founded in having known them for years. Shoot, they had served their time alongside them and so were well aware of their character. They had earned their freedom together.
Maybe that is what has changed. I, we, had to earn our freedom, it was not granted. Today the kids start out with " freedom " and wind up in jail. Could it be that is because they were not taught the value of freedom ? My " freedom " would be taken away for the slightest misstep. That freedom may include being grounded, no television or radio, no going here or there or any other " restriction of freedom " the warden thought appropriate. The assistant warden shared equal power, I called her Mom. Just a whisper from her to the warden could result in, you guessed it, a loss of freedom. Reports and recommendations from any " corrections officer " may have the same result. At the very least you would be subjected to an inquisition ! You had best have all the correct answers and responses during that process. Lame excuses like, everybody does it, would not get you past the inquisitor. Guilt was assumed but the lack of direct evidence did provide you a chance. It was a slight chance, just a glimmer of hope, but justice could be had. You had to be truly innocent though and that was a lesson you learned from that process. Half truths and flimsy excuses quickly deteriorated under questioning.
 I understand the question that poor lady was asking. Where is the village ? The village lies in the heart of the people, that is where the village is. As our villages expanded, whether they were small neighborhoods or large cities, fewer of the wardens relied upon the reports of the correction officers. Freedom was granted without having earned it and the system began to break down. No longer being held accountable to the " village " the inmates created their own rules. What we see today is the result. I wonder what a sociologist would have to say about that theory ?

Fragments

 I woke up this morning feeling like I am adrift. I have been drifting for years it seems, just a ship upon the sea. I have made many ports but never made it home. It was always just over the horizon.  Now I understand home must be next to Atlantis, only a memory, a place of legend and lore, a place I will go no more, a place upon the distant shore. I can smell the salt in the air and feel the sand beneath my feet. The gulls screech and a biting wind, it is winter now, in my dreams. A crust of ice along the shoreline covers the harvest, long clams they call them, my frozen fingers pull them from the mud. I sail alone in these thoughts, it is ever the same for those that wander. Navigating a circle,  we must keep going to reach the beginning. That is the way of life.
 I woke up feeling pensive. Is it the chill in the air, or the rain ? Maybe it is something else. The day lies before me and I can't know where I will go. My charts only show where I have been. Oh, there is hope, hope for tomorrow but no guarantees. It is those memories of hope that haunt my dreams and memory. It is not a sad thing, pensive is not sad. Pensive is " deep thoughts " or serious thinking. It is easy to become mired in those thoughts but I see them as a chart. Studying your past will guide you to the future. The markers of the past still lead the way. That is why home is so important. Important in memory, but not in place. Does that make sense ?
 New discoveries await and that is why I sail. It is the reason I have always sailed. I always wanted to see more, to walk upon the foreign lands. I have tried to find my way, the way I was intended to go. Why I was destined to wander I can not say, perhaps I will know the answer one day. We are all born in one world and die in another. I was born in Bonac and will die in a foreign land. That causes a sadness to fall and rightfully so, but it is the same for us all. I sailed away while others stayed. Those that stayed have seen the place leave, that is the only difference between us. Memories remain, that is all. Fragments in time. Each of us are only a fragment in the mosaic that is humanity. Each of us must find our place.
 When I awoke I felt adrift. Having written the words that I have, my thoughts have changed. I feel I have sailed through the storm and entered calmer waters. I am not drifting at all, just adjusting my course. There is something new and interesting just over the horizon, I can feel it. Life is a voyage. Ironically, home is in the future.

The conscience of government

 In Maryland some new laws went into effect. These are a series of laws concerning " getting a second chance. " They say many other states have enacted similar laws and it is time we caught up. Not being a criminal, and not knowing any either, I wasn't really aware of the need. The thinking goes like this. If you commit crime and serve time for that crime you will be held accountable for that past your time served. In other words, you will be held accountable for your actions but you should not suffer the ramifications from that action, the "ramifications" of that actions will be negated , by law ! The thinking being, that is only fair. What they are talking about is forgiveness. The question is, is forgiving, forgetting about it ? I personally don't think so. Your past deeds, or misdeeds for that matter, should be taken into account when judging your character. What other standard could I apply ? What I hope you will do ?
 These laws only apply to certain non-violent crimes, I didn't read the entire list but apparently these crimes are only a little wrong and therefore " forgivable. " or should I say " forgettable, " In addition, if you broke a law, a criminal act at the time but that law is later removed from the books, the conviction would be removed as well.  Just like it never happened. The government has figured out a method of rewriting the past ! They call it expunged. Again, it is only fair because it isn't a crime now, so how could it have been a crime then ? See the logic there ? Interesting.
 Now, all this was done because ex-cons were having a hard time getting a job. Surprisingly employers didn't want to hire them based on their criminal past. That is just not fair. This is especially so if they haven't committed any crimes recently. In all fairness these laws do say you have to be crime free for a certain number of years before your convictions are expunged. The law doesn't say how you get employed during that waiting period however, but I expect a special program can't be far behind. The poor criminal has served his time and all should be forgiven and forgotten.
 All of this is a reflection on society today. We are attempting to decriminalize the criminal. It all boils down to accountability. We are wise enough to know that we can't just allow everyone to do anything, laws are required, but let's not hold people accountable for too long ! That action is the result of " ramifications ." Ramifications are the consequences of our actions ! We are equally responsible for accountability and the  ramifications that follow. Ramifications are not the result of others actions, they are the result of your own. That, to me, seems to be the part these liberal lawmakers have brushed aside. Using that logic, the logic of these liberals, if I receive failing grades in school I will not receive a diploma. I was held accountable ! But, that doesn't mean I shouldn't get that job because of that, the ramification, because I was held accountable by not getting my diploma so it should be forgiven, forgotten and I must be treated in an equal fashion ! It's the law. At least today it is, unless we change it tomorrow then it wasn't a law in the first place. And then we wonder why we are in the mess we are in.
 Government as our conscience. What a concept and a progressive idea. The government can not make moral judgements that would just be wrong. Just ask any liberal and they will explain that is why the separation of church and state. The government can however dictate ethics. We can not judge a persons character on their past. To ensure this the government will conceal their past actions from us. How ? By changing the laws that were instituted to protect us from criminals. The laws that stated your criminal past would be a matter of public record. You know, back in the days when government felt you had an equal right to be informed. Back to the dark ages when the ramifications of your actions followed you around ! Back when we were held to a higher moral standard. And just what is ethics ? A moral standard and now the government feels it should define that standard. The government as a religion ? As a moral conscience ? Really ? What about that separation ? Creates a bit of a quandary now doesn't it ? 
 A final thought on all this " second chance " stuff, God help us all. That's all I can say. When we can commit crimes, just pay a price and all is forgotten, that is the beginning of the end. I no longer need to consider the moral principle, or the ramifications of my actions, only the cost. That and as long I only commit crimes that used to be crimes but are now not crimes. Except of course those crimes that may have been committed by my ancestors, then I need to pay reparations ! But don't get me started about that. I'm still trying to figure out why I am giving money to the criminals that sneak into my country. It is still illegal to just cross the border without documentation isn't it ? Oh, wait a minute they are not criminals, just undocumented. My government teaches me I should forgive and forget about that, it is only a little criminal, no problem, after a few years we will expunge it and give them full citizenship. They can just pay a small fee and all is forgotten. Such a loving and caring government.