A different kind of crazy

I have often wondered how it is that people can take themselves so seriously. I watch others doing their " thing " and being fully convinced they are great at it. Some are indeed great and others mediocre, and others are just bad. Doesn't make a difference whether it is art, dancing,writing,singing or any other thing you can imagine, some are certain of their abilities. And what further fascinates me is when they continue to do so in the face of contrary opinion. The only conclusion I can draw is that whatever it is that you are doing must continue to amuse you. That is to say, that you remain convinced, in your own mind, that your talent is genuine. Or I wonder if it isn't a detachment from reality. Can you become detached from the truth to the point of believing ? If that is the case then every true artist is just a little bit crazy. Perhaps it is also a matter of being self centered. But all these questions stem from my own insecurities. I am very much aware of that. They say being aware is the first step to recovery. What would I be recovering from ? A different kind of crazy ? Truth is we all are a little bit different.

I do think in order to be successful you must first convince yourself. Following that conviction others may or may not agree. The secret lies in not paying attention to what the others are saying. When we go out seeking approval from others that is because we have doubt. It really is as simple as that. You must be willing to " put it out there " you must believe ! 

The truth is, belief requires no validation. That is a simple truth but a harsh reality. The reality is harsh because it exposes our own weakness. Being completely self assured is a rare thing. I do not doubt its' existence. I do marvel at its' sustainability without positive feedback, without that validation. How can one remain convinced ? The stock answer is you must believe in yourself. We have all heard that. It is that belief that I question. Self doubt, insecurity ? Certainly that is the case with the majority of the population. How to overcome that obstacle is the focus of this discussion. 

I think that the way we measure success would hold the key, the answer to that question. Are we doing the thing for ourselves, or for the admiration of others ? A thorough examination of our motive is required. The whole starving artist thing, no matter the art. The person is doing it as a means of obtaining success. They are willing to sacrifice it all for that dream, or is it, that belief ? An argument could be made for either. It is the recognition of what is a dream, and what is belief that is the stumbling block. At least that is my thought. It is good to pursue your dreams but believing in that same dream is another matter altogether. Believing in dreams may lead to disappointment but a lack of dreams is depressing. Some are willing to take the risk and others are not. Taking a dream seriously doesn't seem like a prudent course to follow. Belief, on the other hand, is very serious business. That is, if the belief is reality to the person doing the believing. 

I do admire those willing to believe. The quality of their work is not as important as the genuine expression of that belief. Quality is after all subjective. I see no value in abstract paintings and dislike poems that don't rhyme. That isn't to say they are not valid expressions just that they don't speak to me. I do marvel at the belief it took for the artist to put those out there ! I believe you must be born with that belief, an innate quality to your personality. At least the great ones are. Some measure of commercial success is possible without that belief by pursuing a dream. Dreams do come true. Can you fool yourself into belief ? No, I don't think you can, and remain sane. But then we must define sanity. And that is another topic altogether. A man could go nuts thinking about this stuff !