Thursday, August 14, 2014

Naming names

We all have heard or read the story, clothes make the man. There is some truth in that. Now whether it has a long term effect or not is questionable to me. It seems we grow accustomed to things fairly quickly. That argument could also work in support of the theory that clothes make the man. Perhaps you would become accustomed to behaving correctly. Either way, I was reminded of this story yesterday. It wasn't because of anything I or anyone else was wearing, it was due to a co-worker calling me Benny. Haven't heard myself being called Benny in years. These days, since about 1971 or so anyway, I have been Ben. Like a lot of men that have a name ending with 'Y" I dropped that when I became a man ! At least that is the perception. Yesterday when I heard that I felt a twinge of nostalgia. I didn't feel emasculated, I felt empowered. Isn't that strange ? Oh my, is it a sign of growth ? Have I reached a point where Benny is just fine again ? Yes, I think I have.
Now my real name, my christian name if you will, is Austin. I have never used Austin. My parents never used Austin. I am jr. and my father never used Austin. He was always, you guessed it, Ben. I do not know what he was called as a child, I never asked him. I do suspect it was Ben because that is who he was named after. A man whose name was Austin Bennett who was incidentally always referred to as Uncle Ben. I don't know why that was, just that it was. Apparently no one liked Austin as a name but kept on naming their children Austin. My perception is, Austin is a fancy name. Would work well for an artist,actor or author, not so well for a blue collar worker. Austin just doesn't have grit. Ben has grit. Now I'm thinking Benny wasn't so bad. I'm thinking Benny is who I am. Benny is not a serious name and I am not a serious person. The name kinda fits. I knew another man named Benny, he was a butcher at the IGA store. Real nice guy and fun. He wasn't a serious guy. The other Ben I knew was Ben Barnes, that man owned the Newspaper Company up on main street. He only had one leg, lost the other in the war. That man had grit, that is why they called him Ben.
I believe we all make judgments  about people based on their name. At least we do on initial contact. Are they using full names or abbreviated versions. We surmise race from names sometimes. We assume certain things based on names. If I am called " BUBBA " where do I come from ? Well, the fact is I was called " Bubba " all the time, by my father. He always called me Bubba. Come here Bubba, where is Bubba, tell Bubba to do it. And where do I come from ? East Hampton, Long Island, New York. Yup, a New York Bubba. No one else has ever called me that, only Dad. He passed in 1990 and so I haven't heard that said since, at least not to me.
Well we don't get to choose our name now do we ? The best we can do is move, or leave those that have known us. Then we can assume a name. Notice the saying is assume, not take. We assume a different name in the hopes of obtaining a different personality. We want to project something different,something other than who we are. The thing there is, in the end, we will reveal who we are. Whether it is by choice or being discovered it will be revealed.
Another curious thing is when others give us a name. A nick name or just use our middle name or something like that. I have done that. My wife's name is Galdys Ann. Her family members call her Gladys. I call her Ann. To me, she is an Ann. Gladys has a different connotation. I can't really explain that but it just is.
All this name stuff is fun to think about. Different names for different times and places. I have decided I am Benny. That is the name I think best describes who I am. What others choose to call me I can not control nor do I wish too. You know me by a name, I don't want to change that. I think this all has to do with the question, " What's in a name ? " Were I to become famous or rich I think I would then become Austin. Ha,ha wouldn't that be a hoot. It would be amusing for a short time anyhow. Like a Beverly Hillbilly sort of fun.

No comments:

Post a Comment