Childhood memories live there, alongside my ancestors that lie in their graves. I need only close my eyes to travel there. The truth is, I am never gone from the place I call home, and it will always be so. It is a fallacy to think you can change that, a myth. The place where you were born and raised always remains home. I may live elsewhere now, but I know where home is. I know every nook and cranny, every intimate detail, I know where my dreams were born and where sorrow is buried. First moments,last times, both reside there.
This feeling of home is different for each of us. The attachment to that home is primarily what we feel. How strong is the bond ? I believe that is dependent upon our individual experiences. That explains those differences in feelings. The bond to our homes is not created solely by time or by just being there. The bond is created by emotion. For some the bond is temporal and for others it is corporeal. Much is made of this bond or lack of it. Popular culture and customs dictate we should long for home. The whole Mom and apple pie thing. To feel otherwise seems contrary. Yet there are those that do not feel a strong attachment to their homes and just move on.
I can only speak for myself. I have given this considerable thought over the years. Were I just to react to emotion, the binding tie, I would be living there still. The reality is quite a bit different. Corporeal necessity has to take precedence. Emotional needs are a luxury I can not afford. That goes with the growing up thing. The thing that made me leave home in the first place. In thinking about that I began to wonder why ? Why should that place (home) be any different than any other. There are many beautiful places in this country. I can find anything that is there somewhere else as well. Oh, it will not be the exact same beach or mountain but beaches and mountains. You get the idea. Further thought lead me to this conclusion, the main difference is, at home there is a place for everything, whatever I choose to do. In new places you have to look. It is this looking that makes me feel uncomfortable. It is this discomfort that others describe as homesickness.
All the comforts of home. That is a phrase we often hear. For me that saying has acquired new meaning. The comforts of home are more than a warm place to sleep, a good meal and the company of your family. Those comforts also include familiarity. To be familiar is to be comfortable. This can be achieved anywhere. It is only the strength of the initial bond that prevents it. You must have a willingness to let go. This willingness feels like a betrayal. That is how I feel about it. Why should that be so ? Do I owe anything to the place ? That place and time, for time is also a factor, was a gift. Do I have an obligation to reciprocate in some fashion ? An allegiance ? Yes, in a sense I would say I do. It did provide the very foundation upon which my life is lived. In a sense, the place of our birth and upbringing our like our parents. They provide for us,teach us and comfort us. In time, if they truly love us, they let us go. Why should we not let go also ? Would that be a betrayal ? I think not. Maybe that is the obligation on my part. Maybe that will satisfy my allegiance.
Home, a bittersweet memory. It will ever be so. If I have been a successful parent and grandparent the next generations will feel the same way. I will have built them a home. And wasn't that the reason for leaving ?
That is the way it is in my experience. It is neither right nor wrong. It just is.
This feeling of home is different for each of us. The attachment to that home is primarily what we feel. How strong is the bond ? I believe that is dependent upon our individual experiences. That explains those differences in feelings. The bond to our homes is not created solely by time or by just being there. The bond is created by emotion. For some the bond is temporal and for others it is corporeal. Much is made of this bond or lack of it. Popular culture and customs dictate we should long for home. The whole Mom and apple pie thing. To feel otherwise seems contrary. Yet there are those that do not feel a strong attachment to their homes and just move on.
I can only speak for myself. I have given this considerable thought over the years. Were I just to react to emotion, the binding tie, I would be living there still. The reality is quite a bit different. Corporeal necessity has to take precedence. Emotional needs are a luxury I can not afford. That goes with the growing up thing. The thing that made me leave home in the first place. In thinking about that I began to wonder why ? Why should that place (home) be any different than any other. There are many beautiful places in this country. I can find anything that is there somewhere else as well. Oh, it will not be the exact same beach or mountain but beaches and mountains. You get the idea. Further thought lead me to this conclusion, the main difference is, at home there is a place for everything, whatever I choose to do. In new places you have to look. It is this looking that makes me feel uncomfortable. It is this discomfort that others describe as homesickness.
All the comforts of home. That is a phrase we often hear. For me that saying has acquired new meaning. The comforts of home are more than a warm place to sleep, a good meal and the company of your family. Those comforts also include familiarity. To be familiar is to be comfortable. This can be achieved anywhere. It is only the strength of the initial bond that prevents it. You must have a willingness to let go. This willingness feels like a betrayal. That is how I feel about it. Why should that be so ? Do I owe anything to the place ? That place and time, for time is also a factor, was a gift. Do I have an obligation to reciprocate in some fashion ? An allegiance ? Yes, in a sense I would say I do. It did provide the very foundation upon which my life is lived. In a sense, the place of our birth and upbringing our like our parents. They provide for us,teach us and comfort us. In time, if they truly love us, they let us go. Why should we not let go also ? Would that be a betrayal ? I think not. Maybe that is the obligation on my part. Maybe that will satisfy my allegiance.
Home, a bittersweet memory. It will ever be so. If I have been a successful parent and grandparent the next generations will feel the same way. I will have built them a home. And wasn't that the reason for leaving ?
That is the way it is in my experience. It is neither right nor wrong. It just is.
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