Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Waiting on Change

I find myself waiting again. Don't know what it is I'm waiting for, but I'm waiting. I've written about this feeling before and it is a feeling that revisits me very so often. I wonder if others feel the same way ? St. Patrick's day is just ahead. And following that Easter. St Patrick's day is no big deal to me and Easter is a time of celebration, but a different type of celebration. I'm not waiting on either of those holidays. I haven't mailed anything out and waiting on a response. No irons in the fire. Just this unsettled feeling.
I don't like it. I feel like I don't want to start something new because of this nagging uncertainty. Could it be stress ? Don't think so. I'm not pulling my hair out, it is doing that all by itself. My job is secure. My health is good and my wife is faithful and true. Got a roof over my head, food on the table and a couple bucks in my pocket. Life is good. Still I'm waiting. Definitely not procrastinating, just waiting.
I am not one to look to cycles of the moon or planetary alignments for answers. No seers or fortune tellers for me. Things do happen for a reason and the reason doesn't always involve me. I do get this sense that I should wait though. This time of waiting may last for a few hours,days and rarely, but sometimes, weeks. I have yet to formulate a hypothesis as to it's origin. One of the great mysteries of the universe. Or you could say, " it happens. "
Perhaps it is no more than the first stirring of cabin fever. I have seen the crocus popping up next to the steps. A hint of green returning to the grass. Signs of renewed life. Could be that is what I'm waiting for ? Spring ? It is just around the corner. I've always thought of the world as round, so the seasons should come in a circular motion, hence no corners. Spring is just over the horizon may be a better description. I digress.
Yeah, I think I may go with that. Spring, the reaffirmation of life. That is what I'm waiting on. The anticipation of rebirth and new life. Not throwing out the old, but embracing the new. Or as Annie put it, Tomorrow is only a day away ! In the meantime I'll just wait.
  

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