Saturday, February 2, 2013

Foreign Relations

Some of the things we were taught as children are really ingrained into us. " Don't talk to strangers " is one that comes to mind. I'm certainly no wall flower, but am hesitant to speak to those I'm unfamiliar with. A certain standoffish attitude that is sometimes misconstrued as being aloof. I'm not aloof, I'm leery. It is a product of my upbringing.
I find myself more willing to speak to others in my advancing years. I have less fear of the consequences, I suppose. I'm not sure what was supposed to happen to me if I did speak to strangers, but it wasn't good. That much I was taught. Now I find strangers often have the same feelings and opinions as I do. Some strangers are even reluctant to speak to me ! What a turn of events.
There are always the safe subjects to talk about. The weather being the primary ice breaker. Sometimes a recent news event as long as it doesn't involve any controversial material. I admit I am terrible when it comes to remembering names and faces. It takes several meetings before I begin to remember. That's probably because I was told, " It's not polite to stare. " So as a consequence I avoid eye contact. That bothers people. I know, I feel the same way. You may remain a stranger to me for a while after having spoken with me, it's nothing personal.
Each of us live in our own little world. Those that don't live in that world are foreigners ! You have to be suspicious of foreigners. First off, they talk funny. If they speak English at all it is with some sort of accent. Makes you wonder if they really understand what it is you're saying. And misunderstandings can cause a lot of grief. Somebody once said, Europe is a pretty place, but it is crowded with foreigners ! I know what they mean. I've been there and they are correct.
All of this must surely go back to cave men and the clan days. If you weren't in my clan, you were an enemy. It is the most practical view to take. As we learned to communicate with one another, we did become more social. Then we learned how to deceive. You just can't trust a foreigner. Best thing is, don't speak to them.
There is a lot to be learned from these foreigners though. New ideas and ways of thinking. All rewards come from taking some risk. I have become more willing to just, "put it out there " and take that risk. I may travel in your world for a short time, but I will always return to mine. As we age, we can allow our world to either shrink in size or grow. I'm thinking I'll do what I can to grow mine. To become old is unavoidable, to be alone is a choice. Even if I have to talk to strangers ! Besides, I married one of those foreigners and so far it is working out quite well. She talks a little funny, being from Maryland and all, but we understand one another fairly well. Yes, there have been misunderstandings but we got it worked out. Two worlds united !

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