It matters

  I am still surprised at the prevalence of vulgar and crude language in everyday conversation. I was at an event the other day where I had the opportunity to talk with a young man. My wife is with me, sitting beside me, and the choice of adjectives this young man used reminded me of my Navy days. Yes, the language was very similar. What startled me about that was this young man is a college student, comes from a good family, and certainly isn't any troublemaker or thug. Yet, his choice of vocabulary was horrendous. Then I realized he wasn't even aware of the language he was using at all. Not a hint of realization. Using such language in the presence of a lady never entered his mind at all. It wasn't a slip, it was very normal to him. No discomfort on his part. My wife was certainly uncomfortable, as was I for her, but none, on his part. We choose not to say anything, not wishing to cause any problems. We see this young man seldom and it is best left alone. I guess you could say we retreated into the "old peoples" world. 

 I have written about this before, at this point it is hard not to repeat myself, but it is still worth writing. For me it is a sign of aggression, and the world has become more aggressive. Society in general has become more aggressive. The use of obscenities, of crude and vulgar words is a verbal assault. That is the sole purpose of using those words, to impress, to intimidate, or to cajole the listener. The intent is to inflame the passion of the listener! Whether that is to gain support or to get your way isn't important, the use of the language is. What was once the hallmark of the Alpha Male now used by all! Tough guys use tough language! 

 It has become the dominant choice. Listen to our public officials if you don't think so. How often are they using, less than polite, language. I hear it a lot! The Mayor of Baltimore just yesterday saying, "get your ass out there in the streets and do something." That was in response to a reporter asking about his failing crime plan. The Governor of Maryland has a whole campaign going saying, "wear the damn mask!" Yes, that is what it says. That is only two examples, there are many more if you really listen. Is that how our elected officials should address the public? And the perception they hope to project is? Toughness, being adamant, forceful, in charge and dominate! Yes, that is exactly what they are hoping for. Compliance through fear and intimidation. 

 Yes, I know many people think it is just a little thing, but it is not. I read it in Facebook posts all the time. I see it in memes and jokes posted by everyone. I see it most shockingly from "mature" women. I know they were not raised that way but have somehow adopted that as acceptable. They have grown numb to it. And therein lies the danger. The ones killing babies have grown numb to that reality. They don't see a problem with that action, it's a choice. So many things are being dismissed these days and justified by using the catch phrase, don't judge! Just become numb to everything around you. 

 Law and order. You need to understand that law does not give order. That's why they are always written as separate things. Laws are intended to define what is and is not acceptable in society. Order results from following the law. It isn't possible to delineate every action that is acceptable in a society. The Constitution speaks in rather broad terms. That is what has kept lawyers in business since it was written. Words do matter, and it matters how they are chosen, how they are written and how they are spoken. Remember the days when our politicians spoke eloquently, explaining their reasoning and thoughts? Washington, Lincoln, Kennedy, Reagen, and others, all great speakers. Did any of them say, damn, ass, or any other words like that? Nope, Reagen said, "Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall1" He didn't say Mikhail, tear down the damn wall! Kennedy said, "ask not what your country can do for you but ask what you can do for your country" That certainly isn't anywhere near close to what they are saying today! Just this week, on Tuesday, the President of the United States said this, " opponents to my voting rights bill are segregationists, racists, and confederates." Basically, he is calling all Republicans those names, along with anyone else that disagrees with him. A leader? Yes, words matter, the choice of words matter, and the manner in which you say them matter. Something, in my opinion, that should be taught in every school in the country starting in kindergarten.