Just Me

Just Me
Look,I'm just sayin'

Friday, August 5, 2016

something to hold onto

 I'm sure we have all seen the meme about old friends. You know the one, where old friends can go long periods of time without speaking, or seeing each other and just pick up where they left off. They usually want you to like and share if you have a friend like that. I do, but I don't like and share. I figure, what's the point, my old friend isn't on Facebook ! In fact, my old friend doesn't own a computer, tablet, I-phone, smart phone or anything else even capable of accessing the internet. If he did, we would be talking with each other and sharing. But, it really doesn't matter to us at all. I had written him a letter, old school, with pen and paper, and just received a card back from him in return. The letter didn't say much, nor did his card, but at the same time it just as well could have been a book.
 I'm going to say I have known this guy for at least fifty years. Went to school with him, we joined the Navy together, worked together for a while and then went separate ways. I stayed in the Navy for twenty years and he went his way. Life came between us. Every once in a while we would find each other and have a visit. The normal exchange of Christmas cards and the sharing of important events in our lives. The years have rolled by, but we are still in about 1976. I'd say that was a fair estimate. That was the last year we spent in close proximity to each other. Oh, we have had a few hours to visit over the years but that is all. I'm thinking about the time when you saw and worked with each other almost daily. Relationships are formed in that fashion, and altered. Ours hasn't changed much since '76. The triumphs and tragedies we have had since that time we have not shared on a personal level. We have talked about them sure, but that's not the same. I'm talking about those times when you just sit with your friend and your friend listens. They do not judge, nor are they overly sympathetic, they just offer support. The times when just being in their presence brings a measure of comfort and you don't even have to speak. That is the kind of friend that meme is describing, and that is the kind of friend he is.
 Anyone that knows me well knows exactly who I am talking about. This is a friend I speak of often. I can't tell many stories from my high school days that don't involve him is some fashion. He, along with a couple others, formed my social group. We didn't think of it that way of course, but that is what it was. Our own little clique. That was normal enough I suppose. Now we didn't exclude anyone from joining in our little group, we weren't that way, and we had " members " come and go. We all had friends outside of that little core group as well. Friends that shared a different interest or different social situation. As the kids today would say, " it's complicated. "
 Now looking back and reflecting on the years that have passed I grow nostalgic. The what ifs' enter my thoughts. What if I had not gone back into the Navy ? What if I was there when ? All those possible scenarios. My friend lives in Colorado now, many miles from me. His is a different life than mine altogether. I have come to embrace this computer stuff and he rejects it still. I spend my time blogging, being with the grandkids and enjoying what life has to offer. I know that he enjoys music and riding his bicycle, hundreds of miles at a time ! The truth of the matter is we really don't know each other any more. We know each other from 1976. And perhaps that is a blessing. They say God has a plan. Perhaps his plan is that this friend remain my " forever friend " and that is a great thing. I'm not saying we wouldn't remain friends if we lived next door,  but I do believe we have changed over the years. Maybe it is for the best that we do not disturb old friends and old memories. Maybe we should just allow them to be a comfort. Both are something to hold onto in times of need.