Just Me

Just Me
Look,I'm just sayin'

Monday, December 12, 2016

No hurry

 I'll write about just about anything that comes to mind. That is the random thoughts part in the title. Yesterday I began to think about death. I know, strange right, but we all do it. What I was wondering about is, will I die or will something kill me ? I'm thinking given the choice, I would just rather die. Problem is, you gotta die from something don't ya ?  I suppose you can die of old age but wouldn't that then be what killed you ? Hank Williams famously wrote, you'll never get out this world alive. Can't dispute that logic.
 I don't have an explanation for it. I'm not afraid of dying but don't want to be killed. Somehow it seems being killed has to hurt. Sometimes it is right away and at others it could take years. So living a long life is a reward. You get to see everything and when you die, it doesn't hurt. But on the other hand you have to see all your friends leave first. That would tend to leave you lonely is my thought. When you die of old age is it really loneliness that kills you ? I could see that.
 Well this isn't a very cheery subject. I don't feel bad writing or thinking about it though. Death does seem like an abstract thing. I think that is part of the human psyche. It is something we can not fully understand. It really doesn't seem like we just stop, that we were here and gone. No, death has to be more than that doesn't it ? That is the role of religion, to prepare us for that inevitability. Isn't that the end result we all strive for, an acceptance of death ? We think of it as a reward. I believe it is and that is why I'm not afraid of death. Now the dying part, the getting killed part, is an issue. I do struggle with that. Fear of the unknown is a normal condition. It is built into man to act as a brake. Fear invokes caution, a very good thing when you don't what you're doing or where you are going.
 Is there purpose in death ? Seems like there should be. Aren't we told we are being called to glory ? Anytime I've been called somebody has wanted something. I wonder what it is that God could want of me ? I mean, what do I have that he doesn't ? Nothing that I can think of. That line of thought presents a bit of a dilemma. Was I created to only perform  a certain function here on earth ? Then, when that purpose has been fulfilled, I'm rewarded with eternal life ? Or perhaps I'm called back for improvements, sort of an upgrade. The Hindus and Buddhists think that may be the case, although they also think you can be downgraded should you have performed unsatisfactorily while on earth. Now I believe God is perfect so he wouldn't have made anything defective. Of course the choices I make would affect performance. I do get to choose.
 I did wander off topic a bit. I tend to do that. Nothing is as simple as it first may appear. Just living takes practice. But what I have concluded from all this rambling is this; I don't think I'll mind dying, but I don't want to be killed. So, I have to be patient. I can't control any of that. Well it is just as well, I'm in no hurry.