Just Me

Just Me
Look,I'm just sayin'

Wednesday, June 1, 2016


 Since I retired I can't decide whether I am waiting in anticipation or just living in resignation. Seems like something should happen, although I don't know what. That is the anticipation, the resignation is, probably nothing will. The only thing left to decide is if that is a good thing. Working, having a job, has always been a part of my life. I started as a teenager and have held a job continuously since. Have to have a job to have money, right ? That has always been the case for me. Sure there have been jobs that I enjoyed, ones I looked forward to doing, but the bottom line was getting paid. I question if I hadn't been required to earn that paycheck would I have gone to work ? I doubt that. Regardless of any work ethic, or other ideals, I went because I was required to do so. I have fulfilled that requirement. That requirement is defined as having enough. Enough is an arbitrary amount. Is that the anticipation I am experiencing ? I am waiting to see if it is enough. That is followed closely by, what is going to happen if it isn't ?
 I realize it is early on in this retirement. I have been busy with a vacation and some projects. I have enough to keep me busy for a few more weeks. After that, is the unknown. I am a person that enjoys routine. I expect the way I was raised as a child combined with twenty years of Navy routine has ingrained that in me. What routine will I establish when left to my own devices ? Well, I am married and so will receive some direction in that department I'm sure. We'll call it constructive comments and suggestions. I heard somewhere that Steve Jobs or another person like that, got shaved and dressed for work everyday, even when he worked at home. He maintained that routine because he was going to work. I can understands that logic although I don't know if I have the will to do so. But it is the things we do when nobody is looking that really defines our character isn't it ? The things we do to satisfy our own requirements. We need to establish our own " entitlements " don't we ? What do you include on that list ? First you have to decide whether entitlements are earned or granted.
 It is my feeling that entitlements are granted. The feeling that we earned them are only the perquisites to that action. Take retiring from the service for instance. I must satisfy all the requirements first, the act of earning, before I am entitled. Then, having done so, I am granted the reward. It is that way in life as well. So you have to ask yourself , what are the prerequisites ? For the Christian they are spelled out quite plainly. It is that way with all religious belief. What those without religion use as a guide I can not understand, but surely they have some structure or code to satisfy. Just satisfying your personal desires or wishes doesn't seem right. That leaves me with the question, what is required of me in this retirement ? What is the goal ? To what purpose ?
 I'm thinking that this is an opportunity. The degree of success I have had so far in life is debatable. That is an arbitrarily established benchmark. Is it measured by money and fame ? It is a benchmark that you need only satisfy in society's eyes. The wise man does question the standard however. Still it is a standard and worthy of consideration. The removal of established standards can cause chaos. That is where we must decide upon the granting of entitlement. It must be done so in your personal life as well as the public. Just how much am I entitled too ?
 I will grant myself credit for asking the questions of a moral man. It is a struggle to maintain standards when you are granted the power to establish those same standards. It is a responsibility. The responsibility of living among our fellow men. We are a small part of the whole. What we contribute to that whole matters. What doesn't matter is whether that contribution is known to many or known only to you. Entitlement is contingent upon satisfying the perquisites. What are your perquisites ?