self-identity

  I saw a post on my timeline from a stranger proclaiming themselves to be an artist. Perhaps he/she is, I just don't know. But this being pride month and all my thoughts turned to this self-identifying stuff we all keep hearing about. This person was self-identifying as an artist. The thing is though, can you do that? What I mean is I believe labels must be applied by others. It's the only way they are valid in my opinion. If I start identifying myself as handsome, intelligent and multi-talented there is a label for that, it's called narcissism. But many today believe if I self-identify myself in that fashion you have to validate that, agree with me and indeed, support me in that belief. They are calling that empathy. And we are all supposed to be empathetic, aren't we? That's what I've heard and been told on multiple occasions. The ability to share and understand the feelings of others. I feel you brother and you're a bit of a narcissist. 

 Now all self-identifying is nothing more than giving yourself permission. I admit it's very convenient, a lot easier than making any changes, just do as you please and call it my choice. After all, why bother with what anyone else has to say about anything, you decide. If I simply call myself a poet, I'm a poet. If I call myself an author, I'm an author. I don't need to have a thing published, receive any form of reward for that, no external validation whatsoever. I'm an author! But how many others would say, if asked, he is an author? The answer, in my case would be, no one. Not a single person so I'm asking, am I really an author? The answer has to be, no. Yes, yes, I know that doesn't matter but guess what, it does. I really don't have that choice. 

 Reality can be a real bummer. The hardest person to be honest with is yourself. The Bible even mentions that. The Bible says that God weighs the motives behind our actions. We justify our choices automatically, it's an ingrained trait. It's one of the weaknesses of mankind. Usually, we only alter those choices when there is some perceived advantage to ourselves in doing so. Barring that, we attempt to convince others to simply join in with our choice. Everyone is doing it. But it doesn't matter if 10,00 are doing it, it can still be wrong. Entire nations have been wrong! It's about judgement. We are told we should not judge, only God can judge. Ethics involves the judgement of behaviors, that is what sets the standard. Without any judgement there can be no ethics or morality. We should also be prepared to be judged by the standards we apply to others. Whether the other person is a good or bad person is not what is being judged, that indeed is the function of God, but behaviors should definitely be judged. 

 I'm certain that we all judge ourselves to be good people. That's self-identifying in its' most basic form. It's the elimination of standards altogether. To quote a biblical passage, let he who is without sin cast the first stone. What is that saying? Judge yourself and compare your actions to others. This is where the honestly comes in, can you judge yourself blameless? Well, we say, it all depends on how bad we are. There are different degrees of wrong. But the reality is that the differences that exist are the degree of punishment for the wrong. The wrong was still wrong. 

 The bottom line is you are what other people see. That is how you will be identified. It's a perception created by you. It may or may not be who you really are in the eyes of your god, if you believe in one. It's the motive that is being judged. And that's why we have decided that we all need to signal our virtue these days, to remove all doubt. I'll raise a flag, a symbol, or repeat a phrase to broadcast my virtuous intentions. It's an attempt to create a perception. It can also be a deceit. How honest can you be with yourself? How long can you live with deceit is the better question? Living with that, living a dishonest life will certainly lead to any number of problems with your mental health. That's pretty obvious today if you are paying attention. My suggestion is, start listening to what others are telling you they see and examine that closely. Is that who you really are? Don't worry about it being right or wrong just judge that. If what they are a seeing is a lie you have to judge your motive for creating that perception. It's the moral question of, do the ends justify the means. Can two wrongs make a right? Self-identity is far different than public identity. That's the reality.