I have been working on the family tree for many years now. In so doing I have gathered many family stories. Well, not so many stories as assorted bits of information, Information passed on as a remembrance. I have also come to realize that sometimes what we pass on as a remembrance, is really just a repeat. The person telling that remembrance are really telling you what they were told. It's a sort of claim to the past, to secret knowledge. We all enjoy knowing things that we feel others don't. It does give us a brief sense of superiority. Yes, it's true and we secretly all enjoy that. And for that reason we will sometimes lay claim to other peoples memories as our own. And it becomes more common as we get older. The reason for that are witnesses. The older we get the fewer witnesses are left to refute our claims.
I had that brought to my attention a while back as I read some history. Now I was lead to believe that Great Grandfather Lester had known a man named Stephen Talkhouse. Talkhouse is a famous man in my area of the country. Great Grandfather Lester even had a walking stick purported to belong to him. That was the family story. Fact is, Great Grandfather couldn't have known him at all, Talkhouse died in 1879 but Great Grandfather was born in 1878. I don't believe he would remember him. But that was the story perpetuated over the years, by family stories. Credibility was added to the story because Great Grandfather was friend to an Indian lady named Poncohantus Pharoah. I vaguely recall meeting this lady, as she passed when I was ten years old. Still I can claim to have known her and like a game of post office: do the kids play that anymore, the story goes forward, albeit with some alterations I'm sure.
Now this can also be true with places as well as people. We can tell others where something was or wasn't based on what we were told. The only problem being, were we given the correct information. If we take the time and effort to research things we may find out that all isn't what it appeared to be at all. With the availability of information these days we can discover the truth easily enough. So many documents are there if we just look for them. Sometimes those documents dispute oral histories.
I think we like to tell our stories as the authority. Aren't they the best? When there is no one to dispute your claim, when you are the sole proprietor of that knowledge, that is when we are all the most comfortable. We are the professor on the stage and everyone else the student. The student can not question the Professor! Strangely if you look the word profess up you will see it is defined as, " to lay claim to, to pretend, often insincerely " as in I profess to believe in God! Still you are not supposed to question the professor, just listen and learn. This is especially true when we can not verify the facts of the subject. He said, she said, or I did, when there are no witnesses to dispute that.
The reasons we change the stories, alter them a bit, are as varied as the stories themselves. We may want to save ourselves embarrassment, shame or liability! We may wish to increase our perceived social status. We may just wish to impose our thoughts upon others by presenting " facts " that can not be questioned. It may also be as simple as wanting the spotlight, if only for a moment. To be the authority! And that is the best part of growing old! Live long enough and you are the authority! I can then tell my tales without repudiation from the peanut gallery. I was there! If there is no one else that can also make that claim, you are the proprietor. I hold that proprietary information. I will only share it on a need to know basis. Usually when it is beneficial for me to do so. Yes, each of us are proprietors of the past. We should all care for it, protect it, and pass it on. Should we make improvements? Well, I'll leave that to you to decide. As for me I'll try to pass it on unchanged, as close to the original as I can.
I had that brought to my attention a while back as I read some history. Now I was lead to believe that Great Grandfather Lester had known a man named Stephen Talkhouse. Talkhouse is a famous man in my area of the country. Great Grandfather Lester even had a walking stick purported to belong to him. That was the family story. Fact is, Great Grandfather couldn't have known him at all, Talkhouse died in 1879 but Great Grandfather was born in 1878. I don't believe he would remember him. But that was the story perpetuated over the years, by family stories. Credibility was added to the story because Great Grandfather was friend to an Indian lady named Poncohantus Pharoah. I vaguely recall meeting this lady, as she passed when I was ten years old. Still I can claim to have known her and like a game of post office: do the kids play that anymore, the story goes forward, albeit with some alterations I'm sure.
Now this can also be true with places as well as people. We can tell others where something was or wasn't based on what we were told. The only problem being, were we given the correct information. If we take the time and effort to research things we may find out that all isn't what it appeared to be at all. With the availability of information these days we can discover the truth easily enough. So many documents are there if we just look for them. Sometimes those documents dispute oral histories.
I think we like to tell our stories as the authority. Aren't they the best? When there is no one to dispute your claim, when you are the sole proprietor of that knowledge, that is when we are all the most comfortable. We are the professor on the stage and everyone else the student. The student can not question the Professor! Strangely if you look the word profess up you will see it is defined as, " to lay claim to, to pretend, often insincerely " as in I profess to believe in God! Still you are not supposed to question the professor, just listen and learn. This is especially true when we can not verify the facts of the subject. He said, she said, or I did, when there are no witnesses to dispute that.
The reasons we change the stories, alter them a bit, are as varied as the stories themselves. We may want to save ourselves embarrassment, shame or liability! We may wish to increase our perceived social status. We may just wish to impose our thoughts upon others by presenting " facts " that can not be questioned. It may also be as simple as wanting the spotlight, if only for a moment. To be the authority! And that is the best part of growing old! Live long enough and you are the authority! I can then tell my tales without repudiation from the peanut gallery. I was there! If there is no one else that can also make that claim, you are the proprietor. I hold that proprietary information. I will only share it on a need to know basis. Usually when it is beneficial for me to do so. Yes, each of us are proprietors of the past. We should all care for it, protect it, and pass it on. Should we make improvements? Well, I'll leave that to you to decide. As for me I'll try to pass it on unchanged, as close to the original as I can.
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