Tuesday, September 20, 2016

home

 Today I'll be leaving for Florida. I'm going to see Mom, my sister and brother. It has been many years since we were all together. The reason is a simple one, distance and economics. It is that way with far too many families these days. It is the biggest detractor in our society today if you ask my opinion. There is a meme that appears every so often that sums that up nicely. It says something about the world needing more front porches. It is a very profound and telling statement. We do indeed need more front porches, more families that stay together. The continuity of generations is being interrupted and not for the better. I could go on about this but I know my readers understand exactly what I am talking about.  So today, I fly.
 During my Navy days I did a lot of traveling. That sounds obvious enough but I meant traveling home and back. I would take a bus, a train or a plane. I hitchhiked a few times as well. It was a different world then. The times I did the most traveling was in the later part of the seventies. Long before security checkpoints at the airport and all that mess. You were free to just travel about fairly unrestricted. Going home was always the destination. Then I got married,had children and took home with me. That is what happens in todays world ; a lot. Families are divided by geographic location. The old home town is left behind. The song the Green, green grass of home brings up those sentiments. One line says, the old home town looks the same and it does, at least in our minds. The reality may or may not be true.
 I'll be going to my Moms' house and it will be the first time I have seen it. She has been in this home for about 8 years or so. So, no I'm not going home at all. I'm going to visit my Mom. It is in Fort Myers and I have been to that city in the past. I couldn't tell you a single feature of it though. So, it is still like going to a strange place. Now, my sisters house I have been to, also about eight years or so ago. This house was undergoing renovation at that time  and was a shambles. I am anxious to see how it all turned out. But the point being, our homes are far more fluid these days. My brother lives in Georgia now and I have never been to his place nor he to mine. It is my feeling you can't really know people unless you interact with them in their own environment. That is the central issue here I think. That is why we need those front porches.
 Sure, we have stayed in touch over the years with the telephone and holiday cards. That just isn't the same thing however. Much can be " left " out or glossed over in that fashion. If you are sharing the same space that doesn't happen as easily. That is true whether that space is the same room or the same town. Once you go farther than that, the ties that bind begin to get thinner. Sometimes they disappear altogether. We often say it is heritage that is being lost. I can see that but feel it is more intimate than that. It is the personal relationships that are being lost. Heritage can be researched and learned, personal relationship can not. That is the purpose of that porch. I am looking forward to " meeting" my sister and brother again. I am looking forward to being with Mom again as well, in her new home. The passing of the years do change us all. There will be moments though, moments recovered from the past and I look forward to that. At least that is my hope. Yes, there are realities to be dealt with but there is still time. Time for memories and a renewed bond. We lost a brother nearly two years ago, he is sorely missed. Dad has been gone for 26 years now. I still think of him all the time, he is not forgotten. So, the rest of the family will gather in  a rare and precious time to take advantage of this time. That is what family is for after all. To support each other. I'm going to sit on the porch, if only metaphorically. I'm am wondering just who I will meet there. They are most likely wondering the same thing.

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