Saturday, July 30, 2016

A society of strangers

 Has mankind sacrificed love for money ? I think the case could be made for that. Perhaps it has become a necessity to do so, just a part of the evolutionary process. But I don't really believe that, I believe it is something we are being taught. Grow up, move out and move on. Some would say it is the American dream. Home ownership and the freedom to do as you wish. I can see that and agree. I also can not help but wonder if we all haven't begun to rush the process a little bit. In the modern world we do have a tendency to rush things. Whether it is gaining that home and that dream,
or being able to retire, we are in a hurry.
 The love part I am thinking about is the love of family. This love is effected by location. Few stay at home anymore. After a certain age if children are still in the family home it is viewed as odd. That wasn't and shouldn't have become the case. I'm not saying every child has to stay home and work at whatever business the father is involved with, what I am saying is a sacrifice is being made. In a ironic twist we are leaving our hearths and homes in search of a dream, the dream is on our own doorstep. The obstacles are great, they take patience to overcome and we have lost that trait. We want it now. Hurry up and grab the brass ring. finance it if you have to, but grab it. And it is that leaves us feeling empty. We find ourselves looking back and longing. Nostalgia we call it. Then we attempt to buy that sentiment, buy what was lost.
 There are those that achieve enough wealth to keep them distracted. For the majority of us however that isn't true. We all become sentimental for the days of our youth. That is because our youth was spent at home. And home is the place we all want to go, even as we travel far and wide in search of a dream. Home is safety, security and understanding. We begin to understand that home isn't a house but a family. That family may be large or small it makes little difference. The family may include an entire town. Family is your identity in the world. It is with family that you belong. No matter how far you roam, no matter how " successful " you become, there really is, " no place like home. "
 The sad part is that families become distant from each other. Time and distance take a toll on relationships, even blood ones. We have the ability to communicate with each other more so now than at any other time in history but we don't. Family members begin to judge the relative success and perceived failures of each other. We lose the ability to empathize with each other. What you see as a fail, I view as a success. That is because a shared standard has changed. The shared standard we call family. It is no coincidence that at the end we speak of going home. We spend our lives here on this earth and wait to go home. What we do with that time defines us. We can spend it searching for a dream, or embracing that which we have. The only question to be answered is, what do you want and how much ? It is a complex issue, no doubt about that. I can't help but feel we are becoming a society of strangers. Why else would we be so preoccupied with identifying ourselves ? We have even taken to wearing ribbons to show support for each others identity ! Think about that. The thing that concerns us now is, what are you, not who are you. It is far easier to say what you are, or at least perceive yourself to be. It is only your family that really knows who you are. Those that watched you grow.
 The confidences of childhood make the strongest bonds. Those are the bonds of love I write about. The ones being sacrificed. They can not be purchased, there is no replacement value on that. We all have to make our way in the world. Each of us are responsible for ourselves. We are not owed anything by anyone. We are given a beginning by our family. That family nurtures us and allows us to grow. Do not grow to become a stranger is my advice. Advice I certainly should have heeded long ago. But, life is a journey and one day we all go home. I don't want to be a stranger there ! I want to be welcomed.  

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