Tuesday, December 6, 2022

it takes experience

  
 Maturity is the product of experience. It has little to do with education or intelligence. If you look up what the experts have to say about exactly what maturity is, you will find they are as confused as everyone else. It is a difficult thing to explain. For me maturity involves making decisions and choices that benefit the whole rather than the self. That is to say the ability to weight those choices and make the correct choice. It involves thinking in the long term. That's why we typically think of older people as being mature. Unfortunately, it's not necessarily true though. 
 Experience does come with time that much is true. Experience is also gained from doing. Yes, it comes from experiencing life. A great deal depends upon what you are exposed to in that department. In years past we were all exposed to more "experiences" in life as a matter of course. It may have been doing chores or watching your younger siblings. It may have been other responsibilities. The key was always being accountable for your actions. It was that accountability that developed maturity. Today some folks call that adulting. I think of it as learning to accept reality. That can take a while for some. That isn't to say you can't work toward changing that reality, that's an adult approach, but you first have to accept reality. The first reality to learn is, life isn't fair. It was never fair; it will never be fair. Maturity is doing what needs to be done when confronted with the unfair. True even when the unfairness is directed at you! "Justice is a certain rectitude of mind whereby a man does what he ought to do in circumstances confronting him." –Saint Thomas Aquinas He said it better than I do. 
 It is this maturity that came to mind as I read an article where the Democrats are attempting to lower the voting age in Boston, and other places, to sixteen. I seriously question the maturity of any sixteen year today. It's my thinking they have not been exposed, nor accountable for many of things children in the past were. It's just a social thing. Each generation does want better for the next and as a result tend to protect their offspring. Setting aside all the exceptions and isolated cases I'd say children today have it pretty darn easy. Corporeal punishment was the norm just two generations ago. Children weren't calling social services because their feelings were hurt. All I am saying is this, being exposed to "adult" themes does not make you mature. It's true the kids today are certainly well aware of all those "adult" themes that we snickered about on the playground. But we weren't questioning what gender we were either! We accepted reality. 
 I don't think it is wise to lower the voting age to sixteen. I don't believe many would have the maturity to make a decision based on anything more than emotion. That's what kids tend to do. This is especially true today with social media driving the narrative. It is true that children and young adults are easily swayed with promises. That's a component of maturity as well. It figures in with the long-term goal. Today we are teaching the children to be activists instead of doers. We call it raising awareness. It feeds the immature mind. 
 Bias is a term thrown around a lot these days. Whether it is preceded by racial or gender we are teaching our children that everyone has bias. That in itself isn't a bad thing to teach them. Teaching them they are born with this "bias" and only by constant struggle and awareness can they make amends for the things they didn't do; not so good. Teaching them to react to emotions rather than reason, not so good. Discretion is the better part of valor is not just a saying, it is sage advice. 
 It is interesting to note the age of some of the founding fathers of this great country of ours. They weren't old fogies at all. The majority of them were under forty and several were teenagers! But their level of maturity was certainly high enough having been exposed to the harsh realities of life in those days. Yes, forty was getting on in years back then. They had experience! The goal of parents back then wasn't any different than it is today. They wanted better for their children. I'm certain they thought their "kids" acted immaturely in certain manners. I'm certain many were upset with the founding fathers, calling them a bunch of hotheads. Still, what was the goal these young hotheads wanted to achieve? " A new nation conceived in liberty and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal" I'd call that a mature statement. What would a sixteen-year-old want today? Free wi-fi for everyone, free health care, and everyone using their preferred pronouns? 
 Maturity is the product of experience. You gain experience by being held accountable. You really can't just do whatever you like, call it freedom of expression, and insist everyone else adopt that. A person must be held to account before they can achieve a measure of maturity. Knowing the problem, protesting the problem, and blaming others for the problem isn't maturity! Maturity is in acceptance and reacting accordingly in the best interest of all. Takes experience. 

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