ignorant

 Strange isn't it? If someone tells you they received a judgement that is usually a good thing. The inference is always that it was favorable to whomever received that judgement. In short, I got some form of compensation for a wrong. Yet if you feel you are being judged that is a bad thing. The inference there is that the judgement will be a bad thing. The belief being, you aren't doing anything wrong? Or, are you afraid of judgement knowing that you are doing something wrong? Isn't that the fear of God we are told about? The fear of judgement, especially a final judgement. 

 I do wonder about all of that. Why do we assume that judgement and condemnation are the same thing? That is the thought isn't it? Perhaps it is just that I'm an optimist. I don't mind being judged at all, go right ahead. Just because you render a negative judgement doesn't mean you are right. That's how I think about that. In fact, most times I will tell you why you are wrong, that you got the judgement wrong. That will be my reaction. It is only when a negative judgement is issued by a competent authority that I will be concerned. If I judge you incompetent, you are. I've already decided I am a competent authority. Of course, you may not agree, but that doesn't change my judgement. That's how that works.

 That's how it works when I don't agree with the judgement. If I agree, the judgement went in my favor, was favorable to me, or validated my statement, I will fully support the judgement. I will proclaim it just! Justice was served will be the call. I won't tell you that you got it wrong, that a mistake was made. No attempt will be made to overturn that judgement. I may even be magnanimous when accepting that judgement. I was judged and it was a good thing. 

 Judging others is simply comparing them to yourself. That is what it is. The power of that judgement lies within the one being judged, not the one doing the judging. I suspect that is what any decent self-help book or "professional" would tell you. Now I haven't been to college and studied all of this and earned any degrees in psychology or psychiatry but I did spend twenty years in the navy. During that time I interacted with people from all over the country, city folks, country folk, hippies, conservatives, Christians, Jews, Muslims, all races. I knew very smart people and some not so bright. And every one of them I judged against myself. I compared them to me. That was true even though I knew very little to nothing about their lives or experiences. Some I judged favorably and I sought their company, others I did not and so avoided them. I doubt any of that affected any one of them negatively. If they are not told of the judgement, they are not affected by that judgement. 

 So, what we are really asking when we say, don't judge me, is don't tell me. It's a conscious choice on your part to remain ignorant. Oh, there's another word that people bristle at. Ignorant. The word actually means a lack of knowledge. It does have a negative connotation. If no one ever told me their judgement, I would then be ignorant. Ignorance is bliss, that's what they say. It can be I wouldn't disagree with that. We all judge one another every day, with every interaction, it's human nature, unavoidable. The question is, should we tell others about that judgement? For me I would much rather hear it, than not. Granted it doesn't happen very often but I just might change my mind, my attitude or viewpoint. What's funny about that is when I don't change my mind, my attitude or my viewpoint after being judged, I'm called ignorant! Yeah, that's how it works.