Making a contribution. It is something I was told about doing since I can remember. Usually, I was just told to pitch in and help. If you're going to put your feet under my table you need to help out around here. That was another familiar phrase in my house. I won't say I was overwhelmed with chores, there was no set list, no specific requirements, but I was expected to do what I could. It was also expected of me that Mom or Dad shouldn't have to ask or tell me what to do either. If you see it needs doing, do it!
I don't think any of that was a conscious parenting choice by my parents. They weren't sitting around having discussions about any of that. No, it was the way they were raised and figured that is how all kids should be raised. I heard all the stories from them about walking to school, uphill for miles, and the chores they had to do when they got back home. I heard about what they had to go without. I guess they didn't want me "spoiled" and so figured I should do the same. I can say, I wasn't spoiled. My siblings would more than likely have a different opinion. But whatever the case was, I was expected to pitch and make a contribution.
When I got my first real job, I think it was as a garbage collector for the summer, my father thought I should pay room and board. Well, that was a bit of a sticking point with me. My argument was simple enough, if I didn't go to work didn't have a job, would I still get room and board? Dad agreed that I wouldn't be thrown out of the house, that isn't what he intended. So, I argued why should I give you money for what I'm already getting for free? The look on his face when I said that was something I'll always remember, it was shock! His face turned red, he began to sputter a bit, mumbling something unintelligible and Mom laughed.
I never did pay room and board. I wasn't "taxed" unjustly. That's the way I saw it anyway. I did make a contribution every week when I got paid. Dad loved a good steak and I bought him a few of those. I would buy other things too, something Mom needed, or something for the house. I just never gave Dad or Mom cash. Nothing more was ever said about that until many years later. After Dad passed away that became one of the family stories. You know the kind only other family members can fully appreciate. Like those inside jokes, there are inside stories as well. Only funny after years have passed.
Over the years with various occupations I have always felt like I was making a contribution. I was doing what needed to be done without being forced to do so, or asked. It has been a continuation of what I was taught as a child. I always tried to meet the expectations of my employer, that was my job. I can say I never got fired. I never got disciplined either. You can take that for whatever it is worth. I only quit one job because I just hated it. No hard feelings boss but I'm outta here. I didn't feel like I could, no make that would, contribute much. I simply handed them back my apron and said, have a nice day.
Now that I'm retired I do find myself wondering what contribution I am making now. I don't feel compelled to join anything, to volunteer for anything, nothing like that. I worked a long time to be able to retire and just do nothing. I say nothing but I mean doing what I want, when I want, and how I want to do it. And I can, as long as I get permission from the boss. But that is another discussion for another day.
I think some of this is just because it has been a long winter. I've got a bit of cabin fever. A few days ago the temperature reached 78 degrees, I noticed the daffodils in bloom and the spring onions shooting up everywhere. Soon enough there will be grass to cut, yard work to do. I cut my sons grass, that's a contribution. Whatever projects need doing I'm available.
Still, there are times when I do feel like I should be doing something more, making a contribution. Maybe I'm just not looking hard enough, I shouldn't have to be asked, or told what to do. Or maybe I don't need to do a thing. Maybe I don't even need to look! Maybe my job now is just to observe and offer expert advice. You know, Yogi Berra said, "you can see a lot by just watching" History does repeat itself and I'm been around long enough to start understanding the truth in that. Another observation from Yogi: "it's like deja vu all over again. Well I guess the lesson is, do what you can. If you see it needs doin', get it done. Sometimes though there just isn't anything you can do but walk past it.
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