Wednesday, June 24, 2015

doubt and distraction

 It is a habit of mine to write and post these blogs each morning. It almost borders on a compulsion. I don't think I am in need of professional help though. I use them as a time to unburden my mind. Some thoughts are serious ones and others just whimsical. This morning I Find myself distracted. I can't seem to focus on a central issue. There are several things I am thinking about. Problem being, I jump from one to another. Do any of these thoughts really matter ? Probably only to me. That is the way of it most times. It's a good thing though. If I were rich or influential in some fashion, the expression of my thoughts may be constrained. Wouldn't that be the prudent thing ? Fortunately I am free to just ramble on. It may sound self deprecating but I don't think my words have much impact.
 Yesterday I wrote about the debate going on about the Confederate battle flag. I reached a conclusion, but am not firmly fixed on that issue. The truth of it is I really don't care what they decide to do. It is probably because I am a Yankee and that symbol does not hold any deep attachments for me. It is only of a passing interest. That it is an important social issue is not lost on me. I do not think it will be a defining moment in history though. This country has enough problems that require attention. I think it is the old I can't see the forest for the trees thing. And that is becoming the distraction.
 Another question entered my mind this morning. Who will keep my memories when I am gone ? Read that question again. Who will keep my memories when I am gone ? I'm not asking who will remember me, but rather who will " keep " my memories ?  Are they one and the same ? I don't think that is necessarily so. Could it be that " memories " are the substance of deja vu ? You know when we get that feeling that we have been,seen or done something before. Is that someone else's memory ? The telling of another's stories is not the keeping of their memory. That is only remembering. It is only when we feel the presence of that person, that we make the memory come alive. Sometimes we have never met the person and that is the mysterious part.
 It is time to go about my day, my habit satisfied. I really don't feel like I had anything to say, to impart upon the world. Well, even the greatest authors were just people after all. I don't think Shakespeare went around saying soliloquies all the time. He just wrote them down  Did everything Einstein say have a deep thoughtful meaning ? Doubt that too. 

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