Sunday, December 22, 2013

Social Experience

A few years back, well about ten years ago actually, Facebook was founded. Prior to that I was one of those that would be found in a chat room. Do you remember those ? I had found one that catered to the older crowd and the people in there were amicable. Rough language and inappropriate references where kept to a minimum. We were just being social. Occasionally someone would wander in " the room " and act in a manner that was offensive to the majority of the group. They were asked to leave, sometimes not too nicely, and after a few brief exchanges they would be gone. I believe the majority of these incidences were done on purpose. The individual entering the conversation and just saying things to inflame the others. A form of " conversation bombing " like photo bombing, only with words.
Then this social network came along. We then had the ability to share our pictures and much more information. Groups and sub sets of groups have formed. There are " rooms " for just about every niche you can think of. The Facebook admin group is the general overseer. You can be refused entry into this network or removed according to their wishes. I personally do not know of anyone that has been expelled from Facebook, but it is possible.
I hear a lot about cyber bullying. A group of people ganging up on one person and bombarding them with negative comments. A modern form of social ostracization. It can be very powerful and have drastic, even tragic effects. I do think there is little that can be done about it. Human nature is what it is and the pack mentality remains in us all. It is especially true in our youth. As we mature, hopefully, we drift away from that and start acting in a more responsible fashion.
I do wonder why, in this social network, one would choose to comment in a negative fashion. I can understand if perhaps you just wandered in unawares. I do think you would quickly realize your surroundings, and make some adjustments. Certainly I would temper my comments according to the group dynamic. I don't look at that as a compromise in my integrity, but rather the exercise of good common sense. It is usually best to not speak until spoken to. As a general rule I like to listen first, speak later.
I do believe a lot of what is said on the computer is because of a lack of consequences. I can lie and who knows ? I can make grossly exaggerated claims in all areas of my life and who will know ? The only thing holding us accountable is our own conscience. Sadly, for some, that just isn't enough.
It has been said that attention , even bad attention , is better than no attention at all or something to that effect. I suppose there is truth in that statement. For me, however, that attention ( the bad kind ) is not worth the price in most cases. Unless that negative attention will result in a positive gain, it is a futile exercise. The old biting your nose off to spite your face thing. The words we speak, or choose not to speak, form a shroud over our thoughts. I have found it best to be long in thought and brief in your speech. There are certain topics I will offer no opinion on, unless asked directly. There are also topics that are just none of your business.
It could be that Facebook is nearing its end. I hear about instagram and twitter a lot. Maybe one of those will become the dominant site. This experiment in a social network has proven to be profitable, if not the social experience that was envisioned. I do hope it remains as a way to stay connected to my cyber friends. I will continue to treat those in cyber space with the same regard as those I meet in person. 

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