Sunday, August 2, 2020

acceptance of consequence

 Fifty years ago I was 17. Some days it seems so long ago and others not so much. A lot has happened over the years, to me , to those I have known and loved, and to the country. Funny how when you are young you don't think of a country as aging or changing, but it does. Then once you notice those changes you almost always just want to change it back. That isn't the same with people though, at least not with me anyway. I wouldn't want to be 17 again. Well, maybe for a few days it would be alright but not for a whole year! But I was thinking about that this morning and thinking about what if. We all have what if's. What if we had or hadn't done this or that. What if that hadn't happened. That sort of thing. Would you make any changes if you could go back to a particular time and place? What if that were possible?
The first thing you need to decide upon would be what to change. Would that change be something you chose to do or something else? What I mean is, would you make a different decision to change your thinking about a certain choice, or would you change a local or world event? Would this change be to benefit you or the world in general?
  I was eleven when Kennedy was shot, what if I could change that? How different would the entire nation be today? Seems like that was beginning of the conspiracy theories in American politics. There is still speculation about that today. As for me, what if I hadn't joined the Navy? Were would I be today? And that's the thing I began thinking about, how changing one thing in history would change all succeeding events. I know I'm not the first to think about that, science fiction writers have been doing it for years. I was thinking about it on more personal level however. I'm thinking just about changing my choices over the years. The thing is, which singular thing to change? But then again, you can't change one without changing everything that follows. Is that why my resistance to change? The thing some folks call being stubborn, set in my ways or downright obstinate. Perhaps it is really forward thinking, thinking about consequences before circumstances?
 It's my thinking that circumstance always drives the action we take. If circumstances were different, a different choice would have been made, and therefore different consequences. It is the consequences we live, not the choices we make. The challenge is to learn from the consequence and make different choices in the future. But what if we could go back, change the circumstances, wouldn't that change the choices? For instance, what if we could change our parents financial status? That is to say, what if you were born to wealth. What influence would that have on your choices? Same with race, religion or position in society. Wouldn't all those things change the choices you make? Circumstance always drives decisions, drives those choices. Can we change the circumstance?
 No I don't believe you can change the circumstance. That is a fixed point in time, it's history. You can't change history. The only history you can change hasn't happened yet. Well that's simply because it isn't history: yet. See how that works? So that leaves us with choices. The circumstances will drive our choices but that doesn't mean there are going to be bad choices. Those choices may run contrary to the popular choice, but that doesn't mean they are wrong. The biggest mistake you can make is blaming circumstance for the choices you make.
 You control choice, not circumstance. Each moment in time is a fixed point. That moment defines your current circumstance. You can't change that today. What you can do is choose what course of action you take today. If you keep choosing the same action you most likely will get the same result. Einstein talked about that. The circumstance remains the same. When we allow circumstance to become a crutch is when we fail. Our previous circumstances become a fail safe for our failures, even when that failure is from our own choices. We allow circumstance to defeat us.
 So I'm thinking that if I could go back and change anything it would have to be circumstance. If I could change circumstance that would in turn change everything else. I love my memories and wouldn't want to change them. Of course I would have a whole new set of memories if I changed the circumstances of my birth. Then I wouldn't be concerned with the loss of the memories I already have. Basically I would be somebody else. I don't want to be somebody else, I'm happy being me. Not always happy with the circumstance I find myself in, but I can't change circumstance. I can make choices though. The secret to being happy is acceptance of consequence.
 Fifty years ago I was 17. I reacted to the circumstances I found myself in. Over the years I made my choices. Sometimes good, sometimes not so good. I've enjoyed and regretted the consequences of those choices. You do have to learn to accept the good and bad. What if I had made a different choice?  What good and bad would have followed? Fun to think about at times. And when I do I'm never certain that I like it. I'm thinking there is far too much I could lose. Don't really want to risk it. Good thing you can't change circumstance or the past, no telling what might happen. 

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