Monday, July 20, 2020

reflecting on age

 I woke up to my wife saying happy birthday. Yes, I'm 67 today. My first thought , for no particular reason, was I first joined the Navy fifty years ago! It was in 1970 that I signed those papers, raised my right hand and took the oath. It's an oath I stand behind to this day. I was seventeen years old, a senior in high school and planning the future. I have to say things haven't gone quite according to that original plan, but overall, it has been a good plan. That first decision turned out to be a good one and one I can take pride in to this day. Funny thing about that is, all that seems so long ago now, the Navy I mean. I've been retired from that for thirty years, half again as long as I served on active duty. But I have to say I have enjoyed fair winds and a following sea just as was wished for me by those shipmates all those years ago. Seems like a lifetime ago, several in fact.
 It's not that I'm feeling old, I am old. The hardest part in that is to convince my mind of that. I've seen that meme on Facebook asking how older men get hurt, and the answer is by thinking they are younger men. There is some truth to that. But age is a state of mind. That's true but the state of our body plays a part in that. I have also been fortunate in that regard. Only one cancer scare and one heart attack, I'm doing great. There are those that would say, I'm a survivor! I don't look at it that way, I was lucky, nothing more. The years have passed, things happen, and things will continue to happen. All one can do is deal with it. Helps to have a plan. Thing is you can only plan for what you want to have happen, not for what will actually happen. That's the paradox in life. Plan all you want, life has a way of changing those plans. As for me, to be honest about it, I never had a plan much beyond joining the Navy. I never set any big goals for myself, no grand scheme. I've always done what needed doing is the way I see it. That's what we should do. I've never seen the need to pressure myself, no need to strive for a higher goal, no just do whatever needs doing is my thinking. Guess those teachers had me pegged back in grade school, if only I had applied myself. I wonder though what I would have gained? Material things, money, a degree of fame perhaps? Maybe, but I'm not complaining. I still have plenty of time to buckle down and apply myself, no hurry.
 Today I find myself looking back a bit. It's an enjoyable pastime. I do have to count myself lucky for that, there are many that don't enjoy that luxury. It was on this day in 1969 that man first stepped on the moon. I remember it well, watching those grainy pictures in black and white on the television in the living room. I remember the voices, all scratchy, with the pauses in-between. I remember my friends Mom ordering a commemorative medal off a cereal box that marked that occasion. She ordered one for me as well, as we share a birthday. Happy Birthday Barry Collum. Sadly that medal is lost, but I remember. I have vague memories of when Kennedy was assassinated. Kent State and the events there come to mind. Seems strange to think of that all as history, but it is, and old history to boot.
 Then I come back to the present time and listen to the news. So much of it is a repeat of the past. I have to question if mankind has learned anything at all. You know the " hippies " back in the day where nothing but socialists. Yes, they called it communal living to distinguish it from communism, because there was to be no leader. But it was at its' core, socialism. We all know how all that turned out. Yes people were turned on and tuned out. In the end it collapses, all socialist societies do. The big triumph of that age, that movement, was Woodstock. It is what is remembered as an extraordinary event. Thousands gathered in a festival of peace and love. That's the way we like to remember that but it did spell the end to an era. All the hippies went home after that except for a few stragglers, a few holders on. There are some still today, a novelty, a curiosity from the past. Far out man.
 When I was twenty someone sixty seven was old, real old. Now that I'm here I can see that it isn't that old. It is all a matter of perception. Depends on if you are looking back or looking ahead. I spend a lot of time looking back and as a result I have lots of time. Do you see how that works? No pun intended. Yes things change over time, all things. Social attitudes, fashion, music, the value of a dollar, all those things change. The majority of it I view as expected, it's going to happen. Sometimes it's amusing and at others it is just plain annoying. But what is truly upsetting is when the next generation and the one after that, begin to discard those core values you have embraced since your own childhood. When those succeeding generations dismiss those values as just silly traditions, that is what causes genuine concern. No, it causes anger! As an example take this whole kneeling during the national anthem thing. Some see it as a protest, it's no big deal. I see it as far more than that, I see it as an insult to my tradition, to my country. Yes, it's a big deal to me! Now I hear there is talk of changing the national anthem altogether. Just dismiss the Star Spangled Banner as so much poetry, as just another song. Those are the things that speak to the heart of who I am. Fifty years ago I did take the oath to serve my country. I took that oath seriously, it was a job I was willing to do, same as any other job. Why was I willing to do that? Well the answer is simple enough, someone has to do it. There are benefits associated with that job that I desired, it wasn't Patroitism that inspired that service, it was practicality. Still you have to remember that I believed in those values that I agreed to defend, with my life if required, and that hasn't changed one bit in these fifty years that followed. So when I hear that others would discard those traditions, those values, in favor of something less, and yes it is always something less when you surrender instead of fighting for your beliefs, I grow angry. And that is when you see those angry old men and women.
 It isn't so much politics, that has always been divisive and why we were told not to discuss in polite company. That has changed, a dismissal of common sense if you ask my opinion. What is at stake here today goes far deeper than that, it goes to the core of who we are as a nation. One nation, under God, is the key to understanding that. I hear many saying in order to be a great nation we should give everything to everybody without question or qualification. That is a great nation. What a foolish notion that is. We need to cling to what our founding documents outlined, our basic values, what we believe. Change the belief, change the nation. I did leave a remark yesterday on another post, an observation really. " If you replace tradition, you have lost tradition, and without tradition there is no glue to hold a society together. " It is the loss of that glue that troubles me. 

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