hope and happiness

  As the new year looms on the horizon I am reminded of a quote by Tennyson. " Hope smiles from the threshold of the year to come, whispering, it will be happier. " And this year I believe that is especially true. After nearly a year of the negative we are all looking for some happiness and hope. The vaccine is at the forefront of that hope according to the media. There are two vaccines and a third one promised. It would seem the hope of the world is pinned to those vaccines. Science will save humanity? That is the narrative today, the narrative of the 21st century so far. A move away from the spiritual toward a a belief in science and proof. Interestingly science is proving more and more every day that the last time humanity was saved, it was saved by the hand of God. We know it as the great flood. It was a cleansing of the world, a sort of reboot to humanity. There had been global warming since the words were uttered, let there be light. That was the beginning. Then that light was shuttered, for forty days and nights, a cooling rain fell and washed away the past. When the light returned, the waters receded. Today science calls that climate change. The real question being, who or what drives the science? It certainly isn't man. Man knows very little about any of those processes. So, for me, I have to set science aside when looking for hope. Alexander Pope wrote, "hope springs eternal in the human breast" and it is an idiom we all know. He was, of course, talking about our heart.

 Happiness resides within the heart. Lasting happiness can only come from that, not from any outward source. It is hope that provides true happiness. The certain knowledge that tomorrow will somehow be better is what carries us through. It has always been so. The Jewish people are the proof of that. They are still waiting for a Messiah. That is their hope, their faith and their belief. The Jewish people have certainly endured, that can not be denied. Are they happy? I expect they are just as happy as anyone else in this world. I provide that only as a comparison. Religion, and religious belief are a vehicle to happiness because the vehicle is the heart. It requires no proof, no science to confirm or deny. Religious belief does have one requirement however, it must exist within a boundary. All hope, all happiness, exists within a boundary. When we exceed that boundary, we are unhappy. When we perceive others operating outside of the boundary, we are unhappy. Man requires boundaries. It is the dissolution of boundaries that precipitates catastrophes. Read Genesis to see what I mean. God saw that man was living outside the boundaries and well, you know the rest. 

 New years is a time for resolutions. What are resolutions? Promises. Promises made to ourselves is the short answer. These resolutions may effect others, may even apply to others when done by proper authority, but they are promises nonetheless. What are the usual promises made? To improve ourselves. That what they are. We are aware of our shortcomings and promise to take action to correct that. Often we make that promise in the belief that it will make us happier in the new year. The New Year will be better than the last. And it will be better because we will restrict ourselves, we will live within the boundary. A conscious restraint is the true path to happiness. Happiness can not come from outside the wall. Happiness is the motivation, not the reward. We are motivated to do good when we are happy. When we are unhappy we look for the reason, we place blame on others. If only, becomes a part of the conversation. That is when we start to restrict others, instead of ourselves. 

 Now all of that is on a personal level, it only pertains to ourselves. On a larger scale, families, towns, cities, and countries, a collective consciousness must be recognized. That consciousness will, of necessity, be diverse. As Epictetus said, " All religions must be tolerated---for every man must get to heaven in his own way" as a way of expressing that thought. Religions provide the boundaries. When your religious beliefs infringe upon mine, that is an issue. But it isn't only religious belief that may infringe. Morality always plays a leading role. Our morals are the boundary we set for ourselves. Anytime we step outside that boundary, we experience discomfort. The amount of discomfort we tolerate isn't a measure of our happiness. 

 We find ourselves standing on that threshold Tennyson spoke about. There is hope for a better year. Is that hope pinned to a vaccine? Will science dictate your happiness? True strength lies in the ability to change in response to a conscious restraint. It isn't in eliminating the restraint! Our Constitution was intended to provide that restraint to a nation. Our hope, as a nation, lies in that document. The power to change lies in that document also. Positive change lies within the boundary, not outside of it. My hope for the new year lies not in a vaccine, but in responding to a conscious restraint. It is my hope that the United States of America will respond once again. Within the framework of our Republic change will take place. My hope is for a return, a return to a national awareness of just you we are. We are better than this! Much better. Happy New Year.   

I should have asked

  In thinking about the past and wondering why, it occurred to me that I should have asked. It's really that simple. I could have asked and gotten a great number of questions answered. But I was young then and what could old people tell me about anything of interest? Who wants to hear about any of that? Old people have never done anything but work and complain about everything. They had to walk to school, so what, not my fault. All they seem to talk about is what you shouldn't do and they how did something wrong. Well, not very wrong, a cute kinda wrong. Nothing that ever hurt anyone else or caused a big problem. But they sure heard a lot about what others had done and know you shouldn't do that! Funny how that works isn't it? 

 If old people aren't talking about that stuff, they are talking about dead people. Do you remember so and so? No, I don't, they are dead. How interesting can dead people be? I mean unless they are criminals or did something really cool, who cares? They are just as boring as old people, only even older. And old people always think the stuff they had was so cool, it was so much better than what we have today. Yeah well, if it was so great why has it been replaced? A phone with a cord on it and it doesn't even take pictures? That was better? I don't think so. They didn't even have pictures in color! Now how boring is that? 

 Of course now that I'm older, not old, there is a distinction to be made there, I realize that old people are a valuable source of information. Just need to find ones that remember. That is where it gets interesting though. I mentioned that yesterday, alternative facts. I'm at that age where I remember all the good times I had over the years, and yes, I was cool once, I did stuff, but I ain't telling those stories to my grandchildren. Look, they already think I'm a crazy old man as it is, I wouldn't want to confirm that for them. I want the benefit of the doubt anyway. I have been been involved in some situations that, shall we say, are less than honorable. Some aren't cute at all. But the past is the past and should stay there, you can't change it. That's the attitude of an older person, one that ain't that old. It has taken me a number of years to craft this image and I don't want to spoil that. Just tell the basics and let others draw their own conclusions. Heck at this point the grandkids wouldn't believe half of it anyway. I understand that. My grandmother was always a grandmother in my eyes, and she still is. Anything outside of that realm is just speculation. 

 I've always thought that your whole story shouldn't be revealed until there is no one that knew you personally still living. I say that because if you knew that your great grandfather was a famous ax murderer you might tell others about that. If that same person was your father, or your best friend, you probably wouldn't. Know what I mean? Indiscretions, crimes, aberrant behaviors or eccentricities are okay after you're dead, and okay to talk about by those that never knew you. They aren't a topic of discussion when it's current events. Mistakes live in the past. 

 Nowadays though attitudes are changing. Now mistakes are celebrated. It usually begins with the phrase, I'm a survivor. I survived drug addiction, alcoholism, or some other self inflicted malady. Understand it wasn't my fault, but I overcame that! You can make the same mistake as many times as you like as long as you admit to it. If you are engaged in some aberrant behaviors, you hold a parade to celebrate that. Just put it all out there in the open, there is nothing wrong; as long as you say it is right. The only thing wrong is telling someone else that they are wrong. That's the new way. That's cool. Old people wouldn't know anything about any of that, they are just old fashioned, set in their ways, closed minded. Old people are living in the past, they just don't get it. 

 They say you never know until you ask. There's a lot of truth in that. I could have asked and gotten some answers. The thing is, how much are you willing to share? There's the rub. How much have you personally experienced and how much have you heard? Well, I heard that if you: you complete that sentence. You see this old person was taught you didn't air your dirty laundry. That was the saying. You had to wash that stuff first, remove any stains, and don't tell others about it. If you made a mistake, you corrected that mistake. The importance lies in correcting the error, not telling everyone that you made it. That's why you say, I've heard this or that about this or that. You know, but you don't admit to knowing. Not by first hand experience anyway. I've heard about a lot of stuff in my lifetime, but haven't done much of it. At least not stuff I will admit too. 

 You see us old people have learned a thing or two. Imagination is always better than reality. Anticipation is far more exciting than the day. And having a few secrets makes you feel just a little bit smarter than the other guy. It isn't as much what you know, as what others believe you may know. I won't tell you everything and give up that power. We have all heard the Serenity Prayer. It ends with these words, "and the wisdom to know the difference." You can't change the past and you shouldn't try. You do have to know the difference between the past and the present however. You can't live in the present without knowing the past. Old people have a lot more past to draw upon, and that, that is the wisdom to know the difference. Don't wait until that old person is past though, you won't get any answers then. Ask today. 

the right answer

  I wonder why I feel such a sense of satisfaction in discovering family history and mystery. Both are equally as intriguing. I spent a couple hours yesterday doing just that. A mystery solved and a few more uncovered. Now the mystery solved has been kept a secret and I will not reveal that I know that answer, I do so out of respect for the one keeping the secret. The answer, after all, is of no inherent value to anyone that doesn't have a intimate connection. That is to say, beyond that it falls into the area of gossip. I make an honest attempt at not feeding that mill in my family tree research. I have seen others that have no such qualms about stating gossip as facts. It is my feeling the reader will draw enough conclusions on their own without me adding speculative "facts." We hear about that a lot today on the news, they call that alternative facts. 

 Ever since I first began the quest to uncover the past, as far as family goes, I'm like everyone else. I have hopes of finding someone famous. I haven't. I haven't discovered any heroes or martyrs either. No, so far I've just found the regular Joe that had the regular stuff happen to them. My great grand Uncle had his ribs broken by the tail of a whale. Common enough during whaling times. Another great Uncle, Fred, got run over by a Long Island Railroad train. The paper says he was walking along the track. It also said they inspected all the trains for damage, but no damage to the train was found. My grandfather killed a six foot blacksnake in Greenport, that was in the paper too. But, no famous people, no millionaires, no heroes. I've had ancestors in every war this country has had, near as I can tell, no one in my family died as a result. They all came back home.

 I do wonder why I am so fascinated by all of that though. There are few people left that share that interest with me. My Mom, who is now 91, has no interest in any of that. To her it is just the past. I get that, I feel the same way about what I was doing forty years ago or more. Fun to talk to those that shared it with you, but nothing very interesting really. It's like being with old friends you haven't seen in many years. You feel that old sense of familiarity, a closeness, but there is much unknown. And you don't want to ask, seems like you should know, like you would know, if you had paid attention. Thing is we all are busy living and do lose track. And then there are those things you are less than proud of, missteps and mistakes that you would just as soon others not know about. We call have those. That is where alternative facts come in handy. 

 When there is no one left to dispute the facts, you get to write those facts. That's just the way it works. It boils down to personal integrity. How much of the truth are you willing to share? That is where the historical records fall short. Records like the census, baptism, marriages, land deeds and such record stark fact. There is no context behind those facts. You lived here, at this time, in this place, and was baptized or married on this day and in this place. That's all the record tells you though. Oh, I know those records are invaluable as they also record the other people involved. You can make many discoveries by reading those documents. They can also be the source of mystery. I didn't know that, why is this person listed here? I guess I am fascinated because just like Paul Harvey, I want to know the rest of the story. Surely there is more to it than that? 

 Still, I wonder. Even if I knew all those answers of what benefit would it be? Shouldn't I spend my time and energy doing something constructive, something useful? I mean, if not of benefit to myself, to benefit others? All the time and research, all the money spent, for what? To find answers to questions not yet asked? Seems rather foolish in that way doesn't it? If I am the only one that cares, is it worth it? Well, to me it certainly is. There are times I feel like I am preparing myself for a test, although I have no idea what that test may be. I do have a great number of answers to old questions. Thing there is, all the ones that asked those questions are gone now. Those that have the answers to my questions are all gone too! It's quite the quandary. 

 The fascination with family is a strong one for me. I just want to know who, what, where , when, and why. The truth is the why is the most interesting part for me, and the part I am less likely to discover. How many of us record the why? We may record the motivation, but is that always the why? I'd say it is not. I do believe most things we do, we do for ourselves on some level. It may benefit another, it may cost us something, but we still do it. Why? Because sometimes it just feels good and we want that feeling. We want the self satisfaction inherent in doing the right thing, having the right answer. And I guess that is what I'm looking for, the right answers. Truth be told, we all are.         

Reward or bribe?

 It appears once again the lobbyists have won the day. The President signed that bill, pork and all. He had little choice, backed into the corner. If he didn't sign the government shuts down, millions of people lose whatever help they have been getting. Yes, yes, I know the main stream media will tell you how heartless and uncaring Trump is and you may believe that but that doesn't change simple facts. This bill, over 5500 hundred pages of pork, barely mentions Americans. But this bill was constructed by lobbyists, make no mistake about that. Our lawmakers agreed to that after having their pockets lined. We will be forced back to "normal." The new normal will be even more staggering debt. It will be quasi-martial rule. It won't be the military, it will be basic needs like food, water, and housing. Those are the items being threatened if you fail to comply. That is what the campaign is all about. 

 There has been a steady campaign of fear and doubt for over nine months now. The greatest majority have grown tired and are complying and indeed forcing others to comply with all the government mandates. Social distancing and wearing a mask have become almost second nature now. Nothing unusual about that right? I'm doing those things for humanity! If I don't, I should be ostracized from society. Just as Christians where seen as a threat to the Roman Empire, those of us that defy government "science" are being persecuted. And the mob, the mob loves it! As long as the mob receives free bread and entertainment, they will comply. When that gets threatened however, the mob grows restless. The only solution is to offer more help. More free stuff for everyone. Thing is, you can't please all the people all the time, and that will catch up with you eventually. Will six hundred satisfy the mob? Not this time it won't. Oh, the mob will settle, temporarily, when all aid is cut but the demand will be for more. Governor Hogan, leading contender for the next Presidential race, has already publicly called for another stimulus package right after this one. Does anyone really believe another stimulus package will not include pet projects and aid for foreign nations? If you do, you are really being deceived, or you are just plain stupid. If the money in this current bill were given solely to Americans each of us, every man, woman and child would receive three thousand three hundred and thirty three dollars! Would that solve the issue? No, it wouldn't. You can not support a national economy on tax payer monies when the taxpayers aren't working and paying taxes! You don't have to be an economist to understand that. So where is this money coming from? Borrowed? Borrowed from where? That's what you need to know.

 What you really need to understand is the ones controlling the purse strings are controlling everything. You can get just as upset as you like, get mad, threaten, protest or parade all you want. When your stomach is empty, your children hungry, and you are close to losing all you have, you will comply. And that is the bottom line here. Compliance. Once you have surrendered your rights and the means to defend them, the process will have been completed. 

 Who is controlling the purse strings? Is it your representatives? That's what we want to believe, the way it is supposed to work. That isn't what is happening though. The lobbyists are in firm control of all that. It isn't the person , they are just like the tax collectors of the Roman Empire, just doing their jobs. It is the large corporations that are firmly in control. Who was labeled as "essential" ? It wasn't you or I. we are disposable. Look to who controls the corporations. There is no one person, one family controlling all of that. It is a global conglomerate, a global alliance. That alliance has won this round. But we mustn't speak of that. we mustn't speak of independence. To place our country, our citizens above any others in the world well that is just, what? Elitist, prejudicial, self-serving, and separatist? Oh, that's very wrong isn't it? Yes it is, as wrong as can be. We have to be doing for the entire world or we are no better than the rest! You will comply with whatever mandates your government issues willingly and in an expedient manner. It's the only way for you to be a good citizen, a good person. And what is your reward? Whatever that same government decides it should be. It is what you will get in life. Forget about any notion of a reward after death, that's not science. Concentrate on what you can get in life instead. Everyone gets the same. That's the promise. No matter what you do, as long as you comply with the government, you will be rewarded. 

legend and legacy

  I just rejoined Ancestry to continue some searching. I have decided to return to the past because the future isn't looking too great. Maybe some of this liberal progressionism is rubbing off on me, I can rewrite the past. All I have to do is find alternative facts. In fact I spent several hours doing just that yesterday. I have to say I was reminded how easily it is to go off on a tangent and get yourself confused. I did manage to add some actual facts to my tree and my story. They do say you have to know were you have been in order to know where you are going. So I started once again with my third great grandfather, Johann Ludwig Reichart in Germany. Born in 1773, while our revolution was raging, married in 1823, he would die in 1850. It was his son Christian that would emigrate to America in 1856 and serve in the civil war. But already I'm jumping ahead, as I said, easy to get distracted and just wander off. Johann Ludwig Reichart is where my legacy begins, at the moment. I'm hoping to learn much more about him. 

 I do find all of that interesting and a great diversion from today. All the things that were. But I believe our legacy is only one generation away. A legacy is what we leave behind. In one definition it is just money or property, in another it is computer software. As for me, I think of my legacy as what I will leave behind of me, of who I am, and what I believe. A great deal of me came from my Dad. My attitudes, thoughts, and observations are somewhat based on what he taught me either directly, or by his actions. I was one of those boys that spent years trying to be his father, only to discover that person is more myth than fact. I'm still trying to find me, and I have to say I'm a little nervous about meeting him!   I have come to understand our lives are a mixture of fact and fiction. And fact; fact is what we choose to tell ourselves. It is the only logical conclusion I can reach when thinking about others choices. Surely they believe that to be the truth, otherwise they would have to be crazy to believe what they do. I also keep that in mind as I write down my thoughts for future generations to read. It is my hope, that some future generation will read what I have written with an impartial approach, as a means of gaining insight into what will be their past. I also believe that must be done by someone that never knew you while you were alive. Those that knew you cannot be impartial or unbiased. 

 I have little in the way of actual documents to read from the past as far as my family goes. I have no journals, diaries or manuscripts. I was given a sort of biography written by a great grand Uncle of mine. Fascinating to read about his life and what he thought about certain topics. There are no great revelations in that document however, nothing surprising. Nothing I would wish to cling onto, claim for my own. I see a lot of folks doing that these days and I question it. Can we really ride on the laurels of the past? Are we somehow entitled to claim their accomplishment as our own? Can we claim whatever hardship and injustice they endured as our own? Should we be compensated for the past? No, I don't believe we should, that enters into the realm of fiction, it was fact for them. It is fiction today. 

 It isn't death that I fear, it is being forgotten. That is what makes me the saddest. I say sad because that is the emotion. I suppose you say in death I still wish to impose my thoughts into the conversation. When I was small I was told to leave the room when adults were talking. Children were to be seen and not heard. As an adult I have discovered most of the conversations the "adults" are having are nothing very serious. The talk is usually about the things we shouldn't be doing but enjoy doing anyway. Or the adults are talking about what others are doing wrong, what we call gossip. In a way I do think the older way, not allowing the children to engage in the adult conversations, was a better method. It certainly kept children from becoming disillusioned early on in life. Much of what I heard about my parents was fiction until I became old enough, then facts were interjected and the story made more sense. Of course there is a down side to that, much of the truth is lost in that fashion, fiction becomes a habit. Doctors may call that denial, but the fact is, they believe the story they have told so many times, it has become their fact. 

 I do try to write as honestly as possible. I have already met with some criticism about that. Once I was met with rage and indignation! I won't say who that was but only that is was a family member. The story I had written didn't reflect their version of the story. I only told my truth and my opinion of what those facts meant. Yes, it was speculative in nature. I hadn't heard those conclusions from the person I was writing about. Still, in the truth there lies a certain risk. And no more so than when expressing your own opinions. The tempering of the truth requires a very skillful hand. I fear I am not adequate to the task but struggle on anyway. Torn between the desire to leave a complete and accurate record, and having others reading that record today, the balance is a delicate one indeed. There are secrets, secrets best left alone and secrets best left between yourself and your God. Life doesn't have to be a tell all. But it is what we don't know that interests us the most. That is the truth, even when the truth is fiction. Some become a legend in their own time, others become a legend in their own mind, and others legend over time. Is the legend true? 

 Ah, legend and legacy. Two subjects worthy of study if you wish to understand yourself. Once you fully understand the differences between them you will have started down the path. Some people will try to live a legend while others concentrate on legacy. Is our legacy really the things we leave behind? Is that what drives some to acquire wealth and property? Is it a desire to leave tangible evidence of their existence? That may be the case even when they are not aware of that. It is my feeling what I leave behind will disappear in short order. By that I am talking about the material things, as for wealth, no one is inheriting a fortune. Perhaps that is why I feel compelled to leave my thoughts behind the only way I can, by writing them down. Man started doing that by drawing pictures on the wall of a cave and that desire remains in each of us. It is primordial. The experts do not know what the real meanings of cave art is. It is speculated that they had a religious connection, some shamanic purpose perhaps. I think it was an appeal to whatever their concept of God was and a cry for help. It could just as easily been a means to boast of their accomplishments. A desire to leave a legacy, a desire to let others know, I was here. To not be forgotten. 

it's time

  So now we will be occupied with debating a covid relief bill than really has little to do with covid relief. It's an amazing thing really. It is so difficult for our representatives to actually represent us? That is what I am thinking. Setting aside party politics each and every one of those congresspersons were elected to represent an American citizen. Well at least that was the intent, the original thought behind the whole electoral process. I do question just how many Americans are concerned about gender studies in the Sudan? And that is just a single line item on over five thousand pages of legislation. You do have to wonder just how the wheels came off the whole deal in the first place. Pundits will blame it on partisan politics and lobbyists. They aren't wrong. Personally I think it must go way deeper than that, to a level the average American can not understand. I'm one of those average Americans. I don't get it. Why can Congress not respond to a crisis without including the rest of the world? 

 It makes no difference to me who said or did what. It is quite obvious the games being played. It's been what six months or more since Congress acted last? That's the way I see it and the way I think most others see it as well. As in every situation there are those that benefit and those that suffer. As always, that always depends upon who you are talking too. Just who is benefitting? Those whose income has increased as a result of this situation, that's who. Namely, big business has profited. Even with the restrictions on store occupancy and a lack of some products, they have done well. When the little competition they had was shuttered could it have been otherwise? I don't see how. Who is hurting? Those Americans that have always hurt the most, the working middle class families of America. Oh sure there are the homeless and the poor that attract so much attention, that receive so much sympathy. But this situation hasn't really affected them in a significant way. Life for them has gone on as it always has. The uber wealthy haven't been impacted. No, it's the working families that are hurting here. 

 The middle class is a rather difficult thing to define. The experts say that over 50% of the population fall into that category. If that is true, and Democracy where to rule the day, shouldn't the middle class be making the laws? Yes, we should, by majority vote. Those that represent us should be voting in accordance with our will, not their own. Do you want to give Israel 500 million dollars to build a defense system? How about 7 billion to expand braoadband access? Will either of those things provide relief to your families? This is about covid relief, right? That's what leaves me angry and confused. Just who are they representing? 

 I will be the first to say I don't understand international politics, foreign policy and all that stuff. I do understand that I elect a person to represent me in Congress. That person is supposed to represent me, not form their own opinion on a particular topic. They are supposed to react in the way I want them to react. I seriously doubt many Americans would vote to give all those tax dollars away without an expectation of return. This country hasn't had a balanced budget since 2001 when the President was a Democrat and Congress was controlled by Republicans. I'll provide the link below if you care to read how that was done. 

 The time has come for we the people to put our collective foot down. This nonsense has got to stop. Our elections are being used as bargaining chips between political opponents. The chips are our votes and that is all the politicians care about. They have lost interest in actually representing you and I, now they represent themselves, their political party and whatever agenda the party leaders decide upon. It has little to do with you and I. But there are avenues available to the people. One of the them is a convention of the states. You may have heard about that, it pops up every now and again. There are groups that are actively trying to get the necessary signatures to implement that. It is a pretty serious step to take and can have very serious consequences. Still it is a far better option than civil war. I don't think we need a civil war, this isn't really about Americans having a difference of opinion with each other. The difference lies between the people and the government! Last time we experienced that, it was a revolution. Article Five provides that path to a revolution, that is what a convention of the states basically is. A convention of the states isn't about the removal of the President, it isn't about removing anyone from any office. It is about restraining the federal government from unbridled spending and policies that go against our Constitution. Article Five is about We the People throttling the feds. It's time. 

How We Balanced the Budget Last Time | Fox News 

Tradition remains

  Merry Christmas to one and all. That is my wish and my thought for the morning. It is my wish that each and every one reading this, and even those that aren't, enjoy this day for what it is. And this, this is a day of hope and promise. When we are children it is about hoping for that special gift, that one thing you just have to have. Then it changes to hoping you can give to others. Eventually we will all come to understand what this day celebrates. It is a celebration of a promise fulfilled. So God loved the world that he gave us his only begotten son. Words I have heard spoken since I was a little child and only as a parent began to understand the depths of that love. And now, the day is here, let us celebrate. 

  I'm waiting for my grandson to come over early this morning. He is coming to Grandma and Grandpa's house for hot cocoa and donuts. He is our college man now and it only seems fitting. Perhaps it will become a new tradition. That's a nice thought. But traditions aren't created, they are born. Strange thing is the birth of tradition is seldom ever known. I have a tradition of "listening to the Christmas tree" and it is a private tradition. When or how I started that I can't be sure but it holds significance to me. Others view it differently, as foolish or odd, but that makes no difference to me. I can't honestly say I have done that every year, some years it is only for a few moments, others it may last a few minutes. But always it is a remembrance of the past. A time for reflection and a time to say thanks. 

  A little later, after his visit to our house, we will go to his. There we will celebrate with our family and share in the joy and laughter. No little children to create that frenzy associated with Christmas morning. No, now before the gifts are unwrapped the paper and bows will be admired. Comments will be exchanged about how pretty this paper is or how cleverly the gift was wrapped.  It is a measured response, a calm. No one will be rushing to rummage through the pile of gifts to find Theirs. Each gift will be lifted up, the card read, and handed to the individual. It won't take long before that is over. There will be no cleanup, as the paper has been discarded as the gift was unwrapped, placed in the proper receptacle. It's all so measured and calm. I do miss that and look forward to having great grandchildren one day. If I am fortunate enough I will witness that chaos of excitement on Christmas morning once again. 

  So today I do wish each and every one of you a very Merry Christmas. Enjoy your day and your traditions. Life goes on and traditions remain. The year two thousand  twenty one is one week away. I'm still not used to saying two thousand anything. Well, enjoy the day for all the gifts it brings. After all, today is the present. 

miracles and magic

 Christmas Eve morning. The day will be filled with activity. I really do have to do those last minute things, at the last minute. I find myself distracted though. Between thinking about getting the stuff done I want to get done, and my thoughts wandering to the past, I'm having a hard time being in the present. Just three lines in and I'm struggling already. The news is on in the background, droning on with more political stuff. The saddest part is to hear the reports of little children asking Santa to cure Covid. What's sad is that adults, parents, have to be telling these children that stuff. The one letter I have seen asking Santa to save everyone from dying. Oh yes it's heart wrenching, it stirs the emotions, and it is also something a child young enough to believe in Santa Claus has no business thinking about. We should keep the child in Christmas. The hope, the dreams, the wishes of a child for toys, joy and laughter. What damage is being done? They are children! 

 The weather is supposed to turn really nasty today. Heavy rain and high winds throughout the day and night. I don't mind so much, it is rain after all, better than snow. The temperature will drop soon enough and ice, sleet and snow to deal with. I don't have far to travel to get to the store. My son only lives a few blocks away. It will be a Christmas day like most others for me. My family has never had big gatherings, it's always been just the immediate family members and perhaps an in-law stopping by for a few minutes. I don't feel guilty about any of that. Life goes on, as my grandmother was fond of saying. I have a rather pragmatic approach to life. Now I hear the governor of Maryland calling the vaccine, vials of hope. What message is that sending to the children? First that governor keeps repeating, like a mantra, wear the damn mask, and now he is talking about vials of hope. 

 I will get focused though. I will shut out the politics as best as I can. I can only manage that for a few hours or so at a time though. There is much to be resolved. Maybe next year. Much of the chaos of this year has been orchestrated, of that I have no doubt. Forces both foreign and domestic working to destabilize the Republic. The media in their haste to turn a profit, adds fuel to the smallest fire. A constant barrage of negativity and blame directed at us all 24/7. The reporting of any good news has become a special feature. The fact checkers on social media are checking your facts before you can finish your sentence. The facts always aligning with whatever narrative the media is pushing today. A virus with a survival rate of 94.6% has shut down a world economy. Our only hope is science. That is what is being pushed as fact, as the truth. 

 For Christians we celebrate the birth of Jesus. That is what this is all about. Yes it has become more about retail than the soul. The children are looking for Santa Claus, a magic elf that brings presents to the good little boys and girls. Christmas is magic and a miracle. When I was small I was first taught about magic. Magic isn't real, it is supposed to fool you, it is just fun. That's why the magician puts on a show, to fool you. And sometimes you almost believe it at the same time you know it isn't real. Santa Claus is magic. But I was also taught that Jesus was a miracle and miracles are real. You could ask for a miracle, but that didn't mean you were going to get it, sorta like Santa, you had to be a good kid. You had to believe, really believe though. That is the magical part. You have to believe in the miracle, not the magic. Santa Claus can't bring you a miracle! Whatever Santa brings is made by man, miracles are made by God. And in that lies the hope of the world. Hope does not come in vials, hope comes in belief. Tonight we will once again celebrate the birth of hope, of salvation. It's not the magic of Christmas, it is the miracle we celebrate.

revived

  This morning I have had my faith in humanity revived. Actually that happened yesterday afternoon when a "facebook" friend extended an act of kindness to me. I put facebook in those air quotes because I have never met this special lady in person, only on facebook. But, the thing is we are connected through the past. The lives of my parents and hers, and generations before them intertwined forming the fabric of history. We share common ancestors, common memories. Both of us were born and raised in the same neighborhood. I'm not certain how many years separate us, but it isn't many. In our youth, as with everyone else, a matter of a few years changes the circle of friends. Later the gap closes and after a while equal footing is achieved. Years turn to decades. Decades define the past. My faith in humanity was restored by this lady, by her act of kindness, selfless and without expectation of return. I have little but gratitude to offer in return. 

 I should explain this a bit, to give context. You see I left that hometown of mine back in 1975 never to return. I had joined the Navy. At that time I figured I would return. Every serviceman dreams of coming back home when their tour is over. It doesn't matter if they where drafted, signed on for two years or set out to start a career, in the end the goal is to return home. Then life gets in the way, things change. While I was away my parents moved away. That is to say, they left home. I also discovered the majority of my classmates, those that I had left behind, had also moved. After twenty years it became apparent, home wasn't where I left it. There was no going home, I was home already. Turns out I took home with me.

 Fifteen years later, in 1990, my dad passed away. It was his wish to be buried next to his parents. You see his mother had passed away when he was just a few days old. complications from childbirth being the cause. Then when he was 12 he lost his father as well. He was being raised by his grandmother, and hadn't really gotten to know his father that well. When he spoke to me of them, he spoke about them as strangers. And so in 1990 I traveled back to the place of my birth, home, and watched as his urn was placed in the ground directly in between his parents. His father on the left and mom on the right. A bronze plaque issued by the government for his service during WW2 marks the spot. It has his name, rank, branch of service and the war he participated in. It says U.S. Army but he flew bombing missions over Europe in B-24's. At that time it was the Army Air Force. A fact I'm afraid many younger people will not know. There wasn't a separate Air Force until 1947. 

 It has been thirty years since that plaque was placed there. I have only had the opportunity to visit it once. There being no family members living in the area, his grave has gone unvisited for many years now. Holidays have come and gone, birthdays and other occasions left unobserved. That is until this year. A dear friend and a lady with a generous and kind heart has laid  a wreath on his grave for me this year. Through the cold, snow, and sleet she took the time to locate that marker. She sent me several photographs of that, one sits beside my Christmas tree this year. Dad has come home for Christmas this year, if only in my dreams. I can't express my thanks and gratitude enough. Denise Morgan Scott you have my undying gratitude. May God Bless you always. 

Placing trust

 It would seem it is official, we are going to allow the mob to rule after all. I read where John Roberts, in the private chambers of the Supreme Court, exploded on the other conservative Judges. According to this report Roberts told the others they could not vote in favor of Trump because it would cause mass riots. Now whether that is true or not I couldn't say. I will say the analysis is correct, it certainly would have. Do the justices lack the fortitude to make such a ruling? Or is it a political football and nothing but political posturing at this point? The outright denial to even listen to the evidence speaks volumes to me. I can't understand why the justices choose that route. They could have heard the testimony, reviewed the evidence presented, and summarily dismissed the whole thing. That, in my opinion, would have at the very least gave the appearance that they were doing their job. The way it was handled has left me full of questions. 

 Setting that aside for a moment there has certainly be evidence of mob rule, especially over the last year. Remember when a mob controlled part of Seattle? I haven't forgotten about that. And what was the response? Let the mob do what they want to do. The same attitude was adopted in several American cities. Looters were given free reign to loot. Mobs roamed the streets with impunity and blocked highways. Nothing was done. The mob has been allowed to have the upper hand time and again. The rule of law? That is becoming a joke, as criminals are released from the jails while the citizens are ordered to stay at home. The criminals will joining the mob, you can bet on that. The mob has been taking down statues all over the country. Was any of that done by majority vote? The answer is no, it wasn't. Majority vote appears to be going to whoever threatens the most violence, unrest, and disobedience. 

 Who is controlling the mob? The media. That's the long and short of it. The media constructs the narrative and then pushes and promotes that narrative. Make no mistake about that. And who controls the media? It isn't all the wealthy people as the media will try to tell you. That's just a deflection from the truth. The truth is there are a group of about 15 super rich people that are pulling all the strings. The remainder of the wealthy are as vulnerable to that group as the poorest ones among us. But they realize the biggest threat to their rule is the middle class. The middle class have enough wealth to survive comfortably and have enough time to really examine things. What I mean is, the poor folks are just too busy trying to survive to be bothered with politics that don't put money in their pockets. That's the reason their policies are designed to keep the poor people poor. They are policies of appeasement, not policies that empower. Free health care, free college, and the lost goes on. Who is going to pay for that? The rich people? No, the middle class will pay for all of that, and continue to pay until they are now the poor people. The rich will still be rich, you can be sure of that much, the rest of us however? 

 You've heard it before, divide and conquer. That is what is happening today in America. We are being divided on every level, in every way possible. Race, creed, color, national origin, rural and urban. The mob is being whipped into a frenzy. That frenzy almost got those super rich into trouble. A pandemic came along to sorta calm things down. Was it really just an accidental thing, a fortunate misfortune? Now the mob has had fear strike them. The media keeps pushing that narrative. A virus will a survival rate of 95.4% has great deal of the mob cowering in fear. It's even being called a war! We are being attacked by the invisible enemy. Our only hope for survival? Big Pharma and they are racing to our rescue. Just listen to the science. Science doesn't offer hope, it offers facts! The message is subtle enough that it is being lost on many. The message is, abandon your faith, abandon your God, trust in the science. The casinos are open while we lock down the church! Do not get your family together during the holidays. Holidays, they mean Christmas, that's what they mean. We shouldn't allow families to gather for that event, an event that reinforces faith. Follow the science.

 The reality is this. The last bastion of the Republic, of the America we all knew and loved, is the vote. The integrity of that system is now in serious question. The mob has been convinced to just dismiss that fact. The mob has been appeased by that system whether it was legitimate or not. The mob is being told, do not question that! Empathetically! Do not question the validity of the results as reported. In truth the mob is being told should anyone raise any serious questions about that, back to the streets, back to the riots and looting. The mob will impose their will on the people. Thing is, it is really a mob of about 15 people. It is my feeling if the results of this election are not fully investigated, if all the facts are not laid bare for everyone, we have seen the end of the Republic. Allow the election process to be in serious question, in serious doubt, and the whole thing collapses. 

 Look I'm not talking about overturning an election. I'm talking about restoring faith in the system. I don't know about you but I have lost faith in the system. Perhaps a portion of that comes from being old. I don't place a lot of trust in electronic devices run by computer chips. When I'm using my personal computer, at home, and I'm the only person to ever have owned or used it and it says, you need permission from the administrator, that gives me pause to think! Who the heck is that? I figure it is me. So there is that. Then I saw ballot boxes on street corners. That surely raised my eyebrows. Where these boxes really secure? No, I don't believe so. I also saw people on the news riding around with ballots in their cars handing them out to everyone. Do we need an ID to cast the ballot? No, that wouldn't be fair. And all of that was followed by more irregularities. Data Dumps in the middle of the night? SD cards being exchanged? And the total dismissal of witness testimony to these things occurring. Can I reasonably assume that everything was on the up and up? No I can't and don't see how anyone else could either. 

 Turn on the news. What will you hear? Everyone must get a vaccination! Everyone! It's the only way. You will submit to authority, to the will of the mob. The media created the mob, controls the mob, and manipulates the mob at will. The tools used are fear and money. The poor want money, give it to them. The middle class wants the staus quo. Threaten that and the middle class will go along. The easiest way to do that is to manipulate the economy. If that doesn't appear to have the desired effect, ie: the economy is doing really well, fear is next. Whether it is the fear of losing your money, or your life makes little difference. The important thing is for you to be afraid! Some folks are not sufficiently scared despite the screams and cries of the media. Hundreds are dying everyday. We are seeing a spike in the numbers. The hospitals are filling up. We are building temporary triage centers. And now, the virus is mutating! And it's the holidays the very worst of all scenarios! Be afraid, be very afraid, the only thing that can save you is one or two vaccines. Of course you will require several of these shots "boosters" and maintenance doses, most likely for the rest of your life. It's the only way you can survive.

 In the meantime pay no attention to the vote. That is all being dismissed as a hoax, fake news, and shouldn't be investigated. Strangely the mob felt the opposite way over the last four years. It wasn't really ever about Trump, it was about policies. Trumps ideas are not in alignment with the mob. He is just some kind of troublemaker. He has enough money to be a real thorn in their side and maybe even connections to others that have a problem with the wealthy elite. Could be he is just jealous that his wealth doesn't compare to that of Gates or Soro's. The motive for his actions wasn't important. Dislodging him from the seat of power was the objective. It began the moment it became obvious that he could win. And win he did. The first outcry was what? He cheated, the Russians helped him cheat and probably the Chinese too. Of course those same people wouldn't help old Joe, no, that is just foolishness. Ah, the mob is fickle though. and will turn on a dime. Election fraud? Impossible, our system is foolproof! The election system has become a tool of the mob. That's my thinking and we must restore it. I just want a clear and honest answer. Is that even possible? 

 The bottom line. Here's 600 bucks and a free vaccination. You'll be alright. Follow the science. You'll be fine. Trust us. Trust the mob. Or, as the Governor of Maryland so eloquently states on those public service messages on television, " wear the damn mask" and he sounds angry! He is positioning to be the next puppet of the mob, and the mob needs to be one of two things, either angry or afraid. The worst thing that can possibly happen is a mob that controls its emotions and reacts logically to a situation.  

    

a couple things

  A couple things on my mind this morning. First off, it's the first day of winter. The final season of 2020. I can't wait until that is hindsight! Ha, it always has been, and will be so going forth. The year of the plandemic, that's how I will always view it. I know there will be a lot of merchandise sold and entitlement claimed on the basis of I Survived. Yeah, well okay then. Fact is 99.4% of everyone infected will survive but we will call that a miracle of modern medicine. Two vaccines within two weeks of each other, in record time, and being rushed out to the public. As for me, I'll just wait and see. Have you read any of the possible side effects on these vaccines? No, so far they are saying they don't have any. And not only that the "efficacy" is projected to be about 95%. So that means 5% of the population will still get covid 19. Now the CDC says a pandemic "occurs over a wide geographic area and affects an exceptional high portion of the population." Is 5% of the population exceptionally high? Well that would be 5 out of every 100 people. If 1.5 million people were infected with a virus tomorrow would that be a pandemic? Guess so and that is 5% of the population of the United States. So you see these numbers can be misleading. If this vaccine were injected into every single person in America about 1.5 million would still be expected to get Covid 19. And that isn't even factoring in the "mutations" that are happening right now. How many different strains will there be? The common cold is caused by a virus, it's a viral infection, no vaccine for that yet. Tamiflu has shown some success is lessening the effects of the seasonal flu but certainly doesn't prevent it. Interesting to note is the sale of Tamiflu is way down this year. Well, something is better than nothing right? Sure it is.

 Today is also the birthday of my twin sons. They entered the scene 45 years ago today. I'm thinking they must have some sort of time machine, made in China no doubt because it is defective, no way could it be 45 years. One lives in upstate New York in the land of cold and snow and the other lives a few blocks down the road from me. They have given me two granddaughters and a grandson. The grandson is in college now. One granddaughter has been accepted to four colleges so far although she hasn't made a decision on any of them yet. My New York granddaughter I haven't heard yet but I suspect she will go to SUNY Oneonta as that is where she lives and her uncle Bill works there as well. I'm not sure of his job title but he is part of the administration. My sons are 45? I wonder how that happened so quickly. Darn kids still haven't learned to listen to me. Well, that won't stop me from trying. 

 Christmas is Friday. I'll just leave that thought there.  

don't buck the changes

  Does change come for changes' sake? It has been said everything that changes remains the same and that is a sentiment I understand. We all want what we once had and attempt to make changes to regain that. That goes forth generation after generation until the circle is completed. Then it begins again. Certain generations in history experience this more than others. There are upheavals along the way followed by periods of relative calm. In my experience the fifties and sixties just went along fairly smoothly until the Vietnam war came along to disturb that domestic tranquility. Protests and social upheaval combined to make for a rough time. Of course I was just a child during those decades and unaware of a lot of the social and economic issues facing my parents. By the time I was old enough to begin to understand any of that my parents generation were already trying to hold onto their past. Thing is their past had been vastly different than mine. As children they knew the hardships of the great depression, and had seen their country attacked by the Japanese. They had gone off to war, defeated the enemy, and preserved our freedoms. In the fifties and sixties the parades were over, the job had been done and Americans were enjoying a boom. Times were good and maintaining the status quo was important. Then, the "boomers" begin to exert their influence. Rock and roll, and new attitudes about sex and social classes. It was an upheaval for certain, culminating in a festival called Woodstock. Woodstock became a defining moment for good or ill. 

 Twelve years ago Barack Obama ran his campaign on change. He was going to change everything for the better. He was, after all, the first African-American president of the United States and now all minorities would receive equal representation. The civil rights battles of the past, championed by Dr. King had made great strides. President Johnson with his civil rights bill and subsequent amendments ensured all men were created equal. It was codified into law! And what change was he promising? The redistribution of wealth is the short answer. Yes they went as social programs but the bottom line was to provide economic relief to everyone. It wasn't about opportunity, as many of the programs professed, it was about entitlements. The narrative became everyone gets the same regardless of effort. All obstacles are caused by systemic racism, prejudice, or other nefarious means. His administration felt they could change all of that. They would change human nature by legislating that. 

 Following on the heels of an Obama administration President Trump surprises everyone, including himself I believe, by winning the Presidency. What is his message? He is going to be the strict parent, the authority figure, and the responsible adult in this situation. Entering an arena of politicians without any political experience his only option was bullheadedness'. He speaks coarsely, bluntly and with conviction in his beliefs. Nothing wishy washy about him, a man used to getting his own way and indeed running rough shod over his perceived enemies. To say he polarized the political scene would be doing him an injustice. He has stood the entire thing on its' ear! He continues to do so. For good or bad, that is the way I see it. He enjoys support from some and is loathed by others. Thing is, you can't tell who is who anymore as it certainly doesn't hinge on party lines. Well that's to be expected with politicians, they have a habit of setting their sails according to the wind of change, whichever way will move their career forward! 

 In a little over a month, barring any unforeseen changes, Joe Biden becomes the President of the United States. What is he promising? Really the same thing as Obama, redistribution of wealth. But it isn't money that will be redistributed, no it will services. Free this, free that, all paid for by the government. Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain, you will have "opportunity." You can go to college, for free and obtain a degree. In that way you can be an educated unemployed person. Health care will be free to all. The only caveat, the government will decide what you need or don't need. The big change? Higher taxes and less freedom. Biden plans to allow thousands, if not millions of "immigrants" into the country. These immigrants will receive the same goods and services as our citizens. All past violations in immigration law will be forgiven. The doors will be flung open. The plan, the world will be Americans! Yes, that is the ultimate goal here, to consolidate power into a New World Order. One government for everyone, no more separate nations or national identities! All will be satellites of the one true power. 

 Is it change for change sake? No it is change to benefit certain parties. Those controlling the wealth , control the population of the world. It truly is a global thing. We are seeing an exercise in that power right now. A "global" pandemic? According to the guidelines of the World Health Organization this is a pandemic. That same organization changed that definition not many years back. In the not too distant past, this virus would not be considered as a pandemic. A change was made, why? No one denies the existence of Covid 19 or that is can cause death, it does, in about.6% of those infected. That's correct in just a little over one half of one percent of those infected! And now there are two vaccines, both created in record time to combat this pandemic. A reassurance that your "government" will protect you if only you follow their advice, their guidelines. You can not survive on your own. What's more they will do so for free. Just don't buck the changes, go along quietly. Don't do it for you, do it for everyone else. Dismiss the idea that Freedom is an individual thing, it is not. Freedom is what the government allows it to be. 

If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude than the animating contest of freedom—go from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or arms. Crouch down and lick the hands which feed you. May your chains sit lightly upon you, and may posterity forget that ye were our countrymen!     Samuel Adams 1776 

ceremonial

 Today at noon I will be participating in the wreaths across America thing. I have been involved with that for a number of years now and will continue as long as I can. Here in Greensboro we will have a small ceremony at the town flagpole. A wreath will be laid for each branch of the service. A short prayer will be offered and a few words spoken. Last year we did have a piper. We have no honor guards to render a proper 21 gun salute but that in no way diminishes the sentiment. Following that ceremony we will all walk over to the cemetery and place the wreaths. I'm certain it will all be a bit different this year. We never have a large crowd and so the challenge shouldn't be too great. 

 I do support the Wreaths across America initiative. It seems the least we could do for our veterans. A wreath placed in time for Christmas is only appropriate. I have read where there is some conflict about this in Florida. Wreaths have been placed on the graves of Jewish veterans. The local Rabbi asked that they not be placed there as he felt it was dishonoring the memory of that veteran. Wreaths across America explained that the wreaths are not Christmas wreaths but rather Remembrance wreaths. They don't deny the wreaths appear the same as a Christmas/Holiday wreath but that is not what they are. They appear the same because the same company that makes them, makes Christmas/Holiday wreaths. Really a matter of semantics I suppose. There are no religious symbols on these wreaths, just a red bow and if you desire the branch of service with a flag representing that service. In my opinion the enemies bullets didn't discriminate against any soldier based on religious beliefs and so a remembrance wreath should not as well. Still, if the family member objects it shouldn't be placed there. But there are those that purchase wreaths without designating any particular grave, they are to be placed to honor the veterans memory, and not to celebrate Christmas. I don't know, I guess I would just say if the family objects, honor that. Shall we say if the headstone contains a symbol of the Jewish faith we will not place a wreath there at all? That would only seem right if everyone in the Jewish faith agrees, and from what I read, they don't. Just like Christians, there are different denominations of Jews, and all don't agree on what is what.

 Well that isn't an issue in the Greensboro cemetery. There are about 10,000 interred there. I'd say the majority are Christians. I'd say that based on the number of Jewish families in the surrounding area. There is a Temple in Easton about twenty miles from here and I suspect there may be a Temple in Dover, twenty miles the other direction. I just don't think there are many people of the Jewish faith around. I have to say I wouldn't know though as I have never asked. The records for the cemetery are somewhat sketchy. In the past paper records were kept but not much information actually recorded. No one knows exactly how many veterans are interred there. If there is no marker on the stone, and no family member to identify the person, it remains a question. as to religious affiliation that too is left to history. 

 Anyway, whatever the case may be I will be there to remember my fellow veterans. We were all comrades in arms. The war, the conflict, the police action, whatever you wish to call it makes no difference. Whether that veteran served on the front line or was a supply clerk in Oklahoma makes no difference. The length of service makes no difference. What their religious belief was, makes no difference. The gender of the soldier, airman, or sailor makes no difference. It is the commonality that makes them veterans and deserving of our respect and remembrance. And that is the only goal of Wreaths Across America.   Hand Salute, Carry on, as you were. Words that a veteran understand all too well. Thing is, after having served, a Veteran will never be, as they were, they are forever changed. Forever a veteran, a title they can carry with pride beyond death. Lest we forget. Placing those wreaths on their graves isn't just a ceremony, it is an obligation. 

if it were different

  There was an article about Major League baseball incorporating the Negro League stats into their record books. The article says it is an acknowledgement that the Negro league was major league. I can't argue with that, they certainly were major leaguers. The fact that they had a league of their own doesn't diminish their talents. The fact that they were barred from the white guys league also can not be disputed. But we have progressed in that regard and moved on from that time. In 1947 Jackie Robinson broke that color barrier. That was seventy three years ago. And here we are today saying the Negro league players were major league players and will incorporate their stats into the record book with the "white" major leaguers. I say "white" for lack of a better term. 

 Now I don't have a problem with acknowledging that the black players were equally as talented, equally as capable, as any other players of any race. Thing is, they were playing in a separate league. With just a few exceptions those players were never tested against the white players on the baseball field. The same could be said for the white players, they were never tested against the talent of the black players. For that reason I can't see how it is a fair comparison to either one of those leagues. It is a matter of, "what if. " What if Josh Gibson had played against the likes of Babe Ruth? Isn't that what we call "fantasy" sports these days. We compare stats against stats and determine a winner. Doesn't matter if the two people are alive, ever faced each other, or even existed in the same century. It's fantasy. Josh Gibson, by the way, was enshrined in the National Baseball Hall of Fame, so he was recognized, as were many others like Sachel Paige, who did play in the "white" major league.

 I did leave a comment on that article and, not surprisingly, immediately I was labeled a bigot, racist, and a host of other names for my opinion. No matter that I said unequivocally that the black players were every bit as talented, every bit as capable, and equal in their playing abilities in every way to any other league or players on the face of the earth. But I had dared to say, they played in a different baseball league. I pointed out that did not diminish their accomplishments in any way, just that it was a different league. Still the attack came fast and furious. Had I ever been denied to join or play in a league because of the color of my skin? No, I haven't and no one else has in the last seventy three years. My feeling is that injustice has been righted. You can not change the past because you don't like the past. You can't rewrite the past and have it appear as though that never happened. No one denies that it took place. My opinion is, the whole thing just seems so disingenuous. Major league baseball is saying what? Yes, we acknowledge you guys played in a different league and were very capable players. We agree that you should have been admitted to the major league (white guys clubs) from the very beginning. So, and this is the part that bothers me, we will now insert your records into our records making it look like you actually played with us. There will most likely be an asterisk beside those names but don't pay attention to that. Seems like pandering to me. And furthermore if I were a black player I wouldn't feel like I need my accomplishments recorded in your book! Is your league so much better than mine? I don't think so. That would be my attitude. The Negro league has its' own Hall of Fame and Museum, with its' own records and that is how it should be. I would be as proud to be in that space as I would be to be in any other! Should we now insist that all the white players be incorporated into the Negro League record books? Wouldn't that be fair and equal? In short, to me, Major League baseball is saying our league is the only one that truly matters, we have the very best league and all others are beneath us. And all those Black people supporting that are agreeing. The way I see it in a few years white actors and actresses should start receiving the Black Entertainment Awards as well. Seems fair right? If my acting job is better than yours shouldn't that be recognized? Or are we in a different league? Think about that.

 Look I don't really care what they do as far as the records go. As I said in my eyes all are equally as capable, as talented and as deserving of recognition. All have received that as well. An honor given is only diminished if you allow it to be. To be in the Negro league hall of fame is as prestigious, as impressive, as being in any other hall of fame. That is, unless you assign more value to another. You wish to speak of pride? Is it pride that drives you to insist upon inclusion in a league that you never played in? Pride in a fantasy world? You know you can always say, things would have been different, if they were different. You can't change history.    

Traditional

  Being a person that has observed current trends and fads more readily than adopting them I do like to compare the past with the present. I do not subscribe to the idea that if it's new, it's better. New and improved do not always go hand in hand. I have noticed that a good number of things are recycled though. It's the same thing only with a different name. The name is a reflection of the times, of the social attitudes of the day. There are times I wish I had gone to college and received a degree in "societal behaviors" or some other such thing. I doubt that it would have changed my life course, but I would have letters after my name when I compose these musings of mine. Apparently having letters after your name fools other people into thinking you know something they don't. Near as I can tell you do gain the ability to come up with fancy sounding names for everyday stuff. But I'm wandering off a bit here. I began writing this with a thought in mind about a current trend. Well I call it current but it has been a thing for a while. The man cave. Lots of younger men when establishing their homes incorporate a man cave. A room dedicated to the manly pursuits of drinking beer and watching sporting events. These caves are a representation of their manhood! The ladies in recent years have a she-shed. That's to show that they are independent, strong women equal to any man. What they do in a she shed depends upon the woman, some are crafting areas, while others are used for meditation and relaxation. A sort of escape to a spa like environment. But it is this notion of a man cave that amuses me.

 Now I grew up in the fifties and sixties. The television shows reflected the attitudes of the day. Television sit coms and such always show the latest trends. Just watch the Brady Bunch as an example of that. Mom and Dad were the hippest. A "blended" family is what we call that today. Mrs. Brady would have her name hyphenated these days, if she changed it at all. But the point is they were cool and even had domestic help, which they treated very respectfully, like they were members of the family. Go a little before that though, to shows like My Three Sons or Leave it Beaver. Mom and Dad weren't nearly as hip. Mom took care of the house all while wearing a dress, heels, makeup and her hair done just so. Dad was a professional man. Three piece suit, an attaché case and smoked a pipe. A upstanding citizen in the community concerned with civic duty, justice and the American way. A man to admire, an authority. And those men had a Den. That's what they called that room. It was their domain alone. If the door was closed you knocked before entering the den. The walls were lined with bookshelves full of the great literature of the day. Sets of encyclopedias and world almanacs filled those shelves. Dad sat behind a large desk, neatly arranged with all the proper tools needed for conducting business. That was the intended function of that den, a command center from which Dad ran the show. It was a display of authority. When entering the den you were subservient to that authority, that went without question. Dad may be smoking his pipe and reading the newspaper to stay abreast of current events and world news. The den was not for entertainment! 

 You see that is what I was thinking about when I said it was a reflection. As a kid watching those shows I got the impression that is what successful men did. You were supposed to be educated, have a job were you wear a suit and tie, carry a briefcase home with you, retire to your Den for alone time while you planned and directed the actions of the family. That was your job, your place in society. You could be a little distant, a little tough at times, but you loved and protected your family. You told the kids no on occasion, felt bad doing so, but it was always the right decision. The kids would learn that before the show ended. Well, at least that is what other families did, although you knew your family wasn't like that. They were the well to do folks. Still, if you made it, you knew you would have a den someday.

 So today I'm wondering. Is the goal now, the model, having a man cave? Is that the mark of success for the common man? I have a man cave where I can drink beer, watch sports, and talk about man things. Sure we let the ladies come in the man cave but they know the men are in charge there. We are only allowing that because we want to. Yes, you may come into the man cave. What does that name imply, man-cave. The image is one of brute strength and male dominance. That's what we think of with cave men. Never mind that it is just a Hollywood created perception of what we think it may have been. The image is burned into our psyche. Funny thing is only the well to do families have man caves  for the same reason the well to do had dens. It's a display of who can afford that. It is far easier to finance that "success" today than in the fifties and sixties though. I wonder if it stems from a desire to return to that time. The time when men ruled! Whether it is a Den or a Cave it doesn't matter what you call it, you are claiming a space, marking your territory. It's a primal urge that can not be denied! 

 It is something I have given thought too. But then I try to watch the shows that are on today. I listen to what the latest trends are. I find it all very disturbing, To say masculinity is under attack is a gross understatement. Sitting in your home theater watching Hallmark movies with Yankee candles burning is not the father figure I grew up with. No, my Dad didn't have a den, he had his recliner. You didn't bother him when he was in his recliner. His briefcase was a toolbox and his suit was made by Dickies. Thing is he was the head of the house, not overbearingly so. but an authority figure for sure. What he said went: at least in front of us kids it did, Mom could negotiate on your behalf, but did so in private. Nowadays the idea is that everyone, children included, has an equal say. That ain't gonna work. But then I am seeing the dissolving of the American family as a whole. A whole new dynamic is being created. Think about it, what is a Traditional family? A Dad, that's a male and knows that he is, a Mom, that's a woman and knows that she is, and children that accept their gender as assigned at birth. The Dad is the breadwinner, Mom may work but is still in charge of the housekeeping and such, The children emulate their parents, boys want to grow up to be men and the girls want to grow up to be ladies. That's a tradition! Think about that? What is traditional? That which is handed down generation to generation becomes traditional. Has that tradition changed in America? I guess so, although I will repeat what I said in the opening paragraph. I do not subscribe to the idea that if it's new, it's better. Man caves? What will follow that? Will we ever return to Dens? 

 All of this means nothing. Funny thing is, if I had a string of letters after my name, included a few more ten dollar words or made up some socio-economic theory, it would be met differently. If only I were a scholar. But all of what I write is just the musings of an older American. An American that has been paying attention. Thing is, things lost are seldom regained. That is especially true if others benefit from that loss. It really doesn't matter if it a box of cookies or a country. So I'm not really talking about Dens and man-caves or she-sheds. I'm talking about traditions. Traditions abandoned are traditions lost.  And what's new and improved ain't always new or improved, just tolerated. I'm finding I have a low tolerance level these days.

that's fair?

 I haven't read much about it or listened to the news about it. Apparently Facebook is being sued. From what I understand it is because they are becoming a monopoly. Facebook purchased snap-chat and some other platforms. The accusation being they are going to control the social media market. I'm a little confused by that seeing as how I don't have to pay a thing to use that platform. I mean, I get the idea of a monopoly, to control and be the sole source of a product or service. In that fashion you can charge what you like. And I also understand it is always about money, no matter what is being said to the contrary, the bottom line is always money. Zuckerberg isn't running Facebook as a charity that much is certain. But is it a monopoly when the "consumer" does not have to pay to use that service. And Facebook is a service, an entertainment service. The only ones paying are the advertisers. Is the argument that Facebook is cornering the advertising market? There are no other social networks to advertise on? I've heard of others recently, it is just that none of them are as popular. Facebook was the first. 

 For me the big question would be, does Facebook, by any of its' practices prevent anyone else from having a social networking site? If they do not, why they should be broken up. If Henry Fords' cars were so popular that no one would buy any other would that then have made his car company a monopoly? Isn't this the same thing? If the majority of the people choose to use Facebook should the government then intervene saying you can't do that. Should other social media sites be mandatory? Isn't using a social media site a choice of the individual? Is it an essential thing? I don't believe it is and for that reason I don't see how it can be a monopoly that injures anyone. The writer of a book is the sole owner of that property. Using this logic couldn't you sue that author for having a monopoly on their intellectual property? I don't see how, and isn't that what we call a copyright? Now as the owner of that property I can license others to use it, think Disney and toy companies, but I still own the property. Facebook sells advertisers the right to hawk their products, I don't have to buy those products though. A monopoly gives the owner the exclusive control of a commodity or service. Is Facebook either of those? I think we can all agree that Facebook isn't a commodity.  That leaves it as a service. So what service does it provide? Entertainment. Is that an essential service not available anywhere else? I don't think so. 

 Who is suing Facebook? From what little I understand it is those that would like to have their own social networking sites. What is the impediment to that? The cost of building such a network is the bottom line. Facebook already has gained the majority of users, ie: popularity and familiarity. The argument from those others is that they can't compete. Really I hear them saying, it isn't fair! Zuckerberg and Facebook were first and "cornered" the market. Thing is, what is that market? Being popular? Was it a monopoly when Elvis Presley had a string of number one songs and other artists just couldn't compete? Is it a monopoly when movie companies own the franchise, like Star Wars? 

 Well, I'll hear more about it I'm sure. It will wind its' way through the courts. As for me I'll continue using Facebook as long as I don't have to pay a fee for such use. I'm not concerned with what advertisers pay to post their stuff. I don't care about any of that. There's a simple reason for that. You can advertise anything you want, as often as you want and I won't buy it unless I want to buy it. You can post your political views, news and analysis all day long. I may or may not read that. I will decide for myself what I believe or disbelieve. I do not rely on Facebook for providing me with intellectual property! I understand what it is, an entertainment. Something I can choose to use, or not use. Should I choose to not use it that will not injure me in any way. Facebook does not have a monopoly on me! I question, can we sue a company because they are too popular? So popular that I feel like I can't start a similar business and compete with that? For that reason I sue them? You have to scale down your popularity? You will use a different social media site because the government says you have to because that's fair? And from what I know that's the big problem here, it isn't fair. More people are driving a Ford than a Chevy! That's just not fair.   

What position are you in?

  I haven't heard of any self help books lately. It seemed like at one time there was a new one every few months. Now, I haven't read any of them cover to cover and I can't say any of them ever helped me. Well I suppose that shouldn't be a surprise I am supposed to do that my self. Maybe I did by not reading those books. But whatever the case is I do recall the book, a best seller, titled, I'm Okay, You're Ok. I looked it up and that was back in 1972. Doesn't seem like it was that long ago to me but there it is. So I had to look it up and read a synopsis of what the guy was talking about. The author said it was a method for solving problems. He called it transactional analysis. Now doesn't that sound la de da. I am amused by that sort of thing and it is something that has continued to proliferate over the years. We have reached the point were some talk about gender neutrality and gender identity as options. But whatever, transactional analysis was based on a simple premise. Each of us have three states or ego's. We are the parent, the adult and the child. By identifying which state we are in at any one time we can solve our problems. 

 The author explained that the at some point in our life we chose one of those ego's. The majority will choose the child. That sets up a negative life position. That position being a defenseless child dependent upon others for caring. That's as much as I read about that. I admit I was shocked. It was like reading something Nostradamus may have written. I can sure see a lot of people in that negative life position today! They are dependent upon others for everything! OMG, in 1972 that man was seeing today. He did go on to say by identifying and accepting the Parent and/or adult role we could find solutions to our interpersonal relationships. In that way I can be Okay and you are Okay too. That's the title remember? I'm Okay, You're Okay. 

 The thing is I did adopt my life position many years ago. I adopted I'm Okay, you're not! I did not choose a negative life position and I've managed to get this far. I haven't written a book about that yet, but I sure have posted a good deal of that philosophy on Facebook. I've also had my decision reaffirmed more than once, I'm Okay, many of you are not! The author was Anthony Harris and he passed away in 1995. I wonder what he would have to say today. I did read where he didn't invent transactional analysis though, that was a man named Eric Bernie and he wrote a book called, the games people play. I haven't read anything about that, I'll have to go check it out. 

 I did google this and apparently the #1 self help book today is, Forgiving what you can't forget. A very brief explanation of how to do that is, accepting that you did whatever needs forgiving in the first place. I'd call it being accountable. But like most of these self help books it is all common sense to me. I've always felt that is what self help books were all about. Just state the obvious. Yes it helps if you have a title like Dr. to add credibility to that. Dr. Phil springs to mind with his son publishing his books. In my opinion he has turned himself more into a Dr. Jerry Springer or a Muray. I couldn't write a book or even a pamphlet about any of that. I can sum it up in one sentence, I'm Okay, You're not.  My advice, listen to your Grandmother if you want to know the real deal. Transactional analysis? That might have a different meaning today. A lot of trans stuff going on. People are now transiting from one gender to another! Well let's do an analysis of that. No, you're not! You are just fooling yourself. It's not Okay. That transaction is bogus. It was first written down in 1698 according to several sources. "God helps those you help themselves." That's what my grandmother told me too. Really it is what Dr. Harris was saying in that book. He helped himself a great deal making a bunch of money off that book. The bottom line as far as I'm concerned is this: I'm okay, I'm really not sure about you. That's my attitude. That is my life position. 

a partridge

  Are you starting the twelve days of Christmas today? Perhaps you started that yesterday. As for me, I start counting on Christmas day. Just what are the twelve days of Christmas anyway? Are they the twelve days you give gifts as in the song. Well it depends upon your tradition. Growing up it was just a song to me and I never gave it much thought. This morning my wife said the twelve days of Christmas begins. She isn't wrong, but there is the traditional twelve days of Christmas which doesn't begin until Christmas day and ends on Jan 6th. January the sixth is the first day of Epiphany. That was the day the magi arrived at the manger and Jesus was revealed to be the son of God. The song, the twelve days of Christmas has been around a very long time, so long that no one knows the origin of it for sure. Bing Crosby and the Andrew sisters recorded that song in 1949. If they hadn't maybe we would have forgotten all about the twelve days of Christmas in America. There is much I didn't know about all of that. Either I just wasn't paying attention, or we weren't taught much about it. The three kings came from the orient, knew that from the song, but not exactly when they arrived. I wasn't aware it was twelve days after Jesus was born before they showed up. I was under the impression they showed up just in time for the birth. I had also never heard the term, twelfth day. Twelfth day is January the 6th. Who knew? 

 I said I start counting on Christmas day but that is only in the last few years. I'm certain I have written about this before, as my wife would say, what haven't you written about, and discovered the tradition is actually begun on that day, on Jesus's birthday. For that reason I'll be saying the twelve days of Christmas begins Christmas day and runs till Jan the sixth. That is because I love tradition because it's well, traditional. I like old traditions and have no desire to start a new one.

  I'm sure you have all read what the presents mean in the song. The two turtle doves being the old and new testament and the three French hens being faith, hope and love. I won't go down the list but it is interesting to look it up. It isn't just a silly song like I thought it was as a child. A partridge in a pear tree? Partridges are on the ground, like a chicken, why would it be in a tree? Later on there was the Partridge family but that's a different story altogether.

 Now having read more about the the twelve days of Christmas and its' true significance I am wondering. Have we, in more modern times, shifted the focus to receiving gifts instead of celebrating the gift? I wasn't taught any of that as a child, at least, I don't think I was. It was just a song we sang, like deck the halls or Frosty the snowman. Now I know differently. I also found out I should leave the Christmas decorations up until Jan the sixth. In the last few years I have always packed mine away on New Years day. Guess I should follow tradition and wait on that. After all, the wise men should see the decorations too. I have been putting them away before they even got there! Well, except for this year, the wise men have shown up early to the scene. They have always been early. The shepherds were the first to get there, way ahead of the wise men. 

 Well no natter which way you view the twelve days of Christmas it really makes no difference, What is important is to understand what the gifts, you received, are! Yes, you were given twelve gifts by the birth of Christ. That's what the twelve days are all about. Although no one knows for certain who wrote the song, it was most likely a chant first. It appears in history during a time when being a practicing Catholic wasn't allowed. That would get you killed! So, the chant or song was composed with a hidden meaning. Only true Christians would understand the symbols used. In that way they could celebrate without drawing attention to themselves. Hey, it worked with me as a kid. I didn't know anything about that. And today I would have to say it is a tradition lost. Do we celebrate the twelve days of Christmas? No, not really. I heard that the Jewish people exchange gifts every night during Hanukah, but that's only eight days. I don't know what it is they are celebrating though, just that it is sometimes called the festival of lights. I really should read more about that to gain an understanding. Strange that I've had Jewish friends and never thought to ask them about that. Guess the topic never came up. I don't recall anyone making a big deal about it at Christmas, what the Jewish people were doing I mean. I knew a Jewish man that played Santa Claus and wished me Merry Christmas, no big deal. I guess folks just weren't as interested in pushing the agendas or religion on others back then. Never made a bit of difference to me what church you attended, or Synagogue for that matter. 

 Now I'm certain there are people that are all well aware of all of this that I have written about. I'm certain there are folks that do celebrate the twelve days of Christmas. Hanukah seems to always be close to Christmas, seemed earlier this year although I don't really pay attention as I don't practice Judaism. We all have our own traditions, even the ones we share with one another. Each family incorporates some small piece into that tradition. That is what makes traditions special. So however you observe the holidays, whether it be candles, twelve days, Christmas trees or Menorahs I hope you don't lose sight of why. My thinking is the why is getting lost in the doing. When singing that song remember who the true love really is. And why the Partridge? The partridge is a bird that will sacrifice their own life to save their children. Did you know that? I didn't for many years but read about it. Makes sense now doesn't it? 

reminders

  As the year pass by my home is filling with memories, and reminders. The reminders are the pictures, trinkets, and other objects collected over time. Just yesterday I walked by a photo of my sister, really one of those cards given to you at a funeral. The individuals picture and a short description and words of love printed below. That picture sits framed on a special shelf. Over the corner of that frame I have draped a silver cross with a silver ribbon. The sun struck that cross as I passed by it and caught my eye. A sense of sorrow passed over me, two years, my sister has been gone for two years already and I miss her. With Christmas upon us and the writing of those cards I suppose the feeling is heightened just a bit. I have an address book that is at least 25 years old. As I flip the pages I do notice the names of those that are no longer with us either by distance or by death. I wouldn't think of getting rid of that book though, I do strike a line through the addresses that are no longer valid. Old addresses and old phone numbers. There are times I'm tempted to mail a card or letter to those addresses, or to dial that number, just to see, but I never do. If only. 

 In the instant I noticed that cross once again I was back in '66. That's 1966. My sister and I both received a silver cross, presented by the Reverend Samuel Davis, St. Luke's church, East Hampton, N.Y. It being so many years ago I don't recall the exact number but they were an award for perfect attendance as members of the Junior choir. We had joined that together. We went to Saturday practice at the meeting hall and sang at the childrens service, 9am if my memory is correct. At first Mom would give us a ride to that practice on Saturdays. Later, as we grew a bit older we made our way there either by walking or riding our bicycles. It was, after all, only three miles from home. We would stop and see our Aunt who worked at Scribners jewelry and later at Whites pharmacy. The jewelry store burned down along with the movie theater in 1964. That same building was also the home to the Marmador, what we would call a soda shop, and our aunt would buy us a malt. We could also stop at Grandmas' house, she was always home. I'm thinking 1966 would have been the last year my sister was in that choir she being two years older than I, outgrowing the Jr. choir. She had saved that cross all those years. I have no idea what happened to the one I was awarded. After her passing my brother in law gave that cross to me, for the obvious reasons. Now all these years later the ribbon is a bit faded and a little tarnish is on that silver plate. I will not attempt to polish it though, preferring to leave it as I received it. 

 Yes I felt a tinge of sadness as my attention was drawn to it once again. A reminder, with the date printed on it. December 4th, 2018 is the day my sister went to heaven. I believe that and I believe she is in the choir. Not that either of us were very accomplished singers, but we were there. Every Saturday, rain or shine, summer and winter. We had a few adventures on our way home from choir practice and from church. I remember hitch hiking home with her, a guy stopped and we got in. My sister was scared to death but held my hand and tried to chat nervously with the driver. Then he said, you're Ben Reicharts' kids aren't you? We immediately felt relieved, well until he asked, does he know you're hitch hiking? We lied, saying sure. And then he says, I'll be sure to tell him I gave you a ride. If he did we never heard about it, but we sure were worried for a while. We never hitched a ride again. At least my sister never did, I did later on in life, when I was in the Navy. Never got a ride from anyone that knew who I was. 

 It's a good thing to have those reminders around. We get busy living our lives sometimes, get worried about things. Then I am reminded, reminded of all the good times and how blessed I have been over the years. My sister is with me, I know that. So are all the others. I'll keep telling the stories. Choir children? Yes we were. Perfect attendance for, I think four years, got you silver. My sister however, deserved Gold for sure.