the final goodbye

 I heard on the morning news that Elijah Cummings will be laid out at Morgan State University on Wednesday, followed by lying in state in statuary hall at the U.S. Capitol. From there he will be taken to the New Psalmist Church in Baltimore for his funeral service. Now I didn't like this mans' politics, but may he rest in peace. I mentioned to my wife how I wouldn't want to be moved around like that and put on display. It seems to me more like a carnival sideshow than a show of respect. I realize I am in no danger of that happening to me but find it disturbing. I'm thinking the Jewish folks have the right idea about that. Get the person buried as soon as possible. I read where their belief is the soul can't go to heaven until the body is in the ground. You certainly wouldn't want to delay that journey! Well, at least I wouldn't want any flight delay in that regard. 

 I will say that as long as the family is happy with that , it's certainly their prerogative. Perhaps Mr. Cummings wished it to be so and that's fine too. I believe we should try our best to fulfill the wishes of the deceased, whether that is an immediate thing, funeral arrangements, or a long term thing. I'm not saying bury the person and forget about them. All I am saying is I don't want to be carted around and put on display. My wish is to be cremated, as soon as possible. I don't want anyone looking at me. Want to see me? Come on over and visit. Do it now, don't wait. Tomorrow is guaranteed to no one. 

 In a way, some things never change. The funeral of a person does depend largely upon the wealth and status of the individual. The ancient Egyptians were perhaps the best example of that. We all know about the pyramids and all that but the regular people attempted to match that as well. It was just a matter of wealth. Other cultures felt it important to bury there dead with weapons and objects of value. Ceremony has always been important and to a degree remains that way. As I said, I want to be cremated, as soon as possible. That doesn't mean I don't want any ceremony, a small dignified good bye would be nice. The playing of Taps and a few kind words is all that I ask. Well, that and a marker of some type. I believe a man should leave a marker as a reminder to others that he was here. I've heard others say attending a funeral gives them some comfort, some " closure " as the term is used today. That's not the case with me, I don't get that from attending a funeral, all I get is sad. The " closure " part comes later for me, much later. A deep loss takes a long time to accept. But, that's me.

 Of course all of this is personal in nature and there is no right or wrong. Whatever makes the survivors feel better. As Hank Williams so astutely observed, we'll never get out this world alive. How important it is to show the survivors the value of what is lost? Isn't that what a funeral is all about? It certainly isn't for the deceased. Death to me surely isn't much different than birth. One day I wasn't here then I was. One day I was here, then I wasn't. The time in between is finite. I believe our memory will be as well. How long I am remembered by the survivors will ultimately determine my worth, not what my family can afford. That's my thought anyway. How long is it before the final goodbye?  Depends on how long you are remembered I suppose.