Fifty some years on and it seems like yesterday. Isn't that the strangest thing? What I'm thinking about is when I was sixteen years old. How much of that kid has remained with me? That is a frequent musing of mine. I don't believe many of my core values have changed all that much. I was thinking about that after have written yesterdays posting. My heritage, it seems, has come into contradiction with the current culture. I am one that embraces the past, past traditions, past sensibilities and past morality. It is sometimes a difficulty to fit them into the world today. It is like being sixteen all over again, in a fashion.
When I was sixteen I wasn't much of a rebel as far as social convention went. Yes, I rebelled against the " rules " my parents established for my behavior. I had to be home at a certain time, I was expected to mind my manners, be polite and courteous to my elders, certain fashions weren't to be worn, my hair was to be cut, things like that. I certainly wasn't one of the " cool " kids and didn't want to be labeled a nerd, so I tried to be a semi-tough guy! Thinking back I suppose that is what I was thinking anyway. Really it was a forced independence, although I was totally unaware of that. It would have been easier to just be cool. I wasn't about to allow anyone to bully me either. I had older siblings for that! Being the youngest and the smallest I was often victimized. That was in a time before survivors, no we just got even. No crying and complaining allowed. No one is going to help you, figure it out.
I see few of the people I grew up with these days. I stay in touch with some, an occasional phone call or some interaction on Facebook. I never did have a large circle of friends, that comes from not being the cool kid. I have to say the ones I did hang out with were all of the finest quality! Yes, I'd say we all shared common values. I have clung to those values, pretty much unchanged, by this modern world. I am becoming increasingly aware of a change in the culture of America. The things I'm hearing do remind me of fifty years ago, I heard much the same back then from the cool kids. Anti-establishment is what they called it back then. The Hippies were going to change the establishment to a culture of peace and love. Communes without communists! I wasn't fooled then and remain that way. Today they are saying, " woke. " To be woke means you are aware of social injustice and the inherent inequities in society. The implication being you are working towards the removal of these things, in other words, be cool man.
Not having been a member of that cool crowd I really don't know what happened with them. Occasionally I will meet or see someone in my age group, a baby boomer, that is still the cool kid. Sometimes described as, just an old hippie, they are often regarded as an amusement. I believe a part of that is because of their ever changing values. What I mean is, they are constantly changing in response to the culture. Fifty years ago we would have said, they're hip! When faced with some moral or ethical dilemma they just respond with , it's cool man, to each their own. The object is to not upset anyone, don't anger anyone, just, " be cool " dude.
There are, of course, advantages to being a cool kid. Popularity is that defining characteristic. You may receive accolades and praise based solely on that. Your actual contribution may be considerably less than other, not so popular people. It's like being the popular boss in a way, everyone likes him but productivity suffers. The best way I heard that described was, you know your doing your job when you see your name of the bathroom wall: followed by a string of less than favorable adjectives! Yeah, I've seen my name there for not being " cool. " I didn't make an exception to the rule. That was the most common reason for that.
Not breaking the rules. That is basically what I was taught. The rules were in place for the benefit of everyone. Sometimes the rules work in your favor, sometimes they don't. It was a lesson I learned early on. I also learned that everything isn't equal. In fact the only constant when it comes to living is that it will never be equal. An observation I have shared on several occasions is that everyone wants equality until they are treated equally. That's when the exceptions roll out. I still practice and believe the core values I was taught as a child. Yes, I rebelled during my teenage years, I modified and justified those values to suit my wants over the years. I'm human. I'm not perfect I'm still practicing. It's the practice that is most important. With the " cool kid " it's all about preaching. And the message must be contrary to the current culture. Different is better! But I have discovered better is recycled every few generations or so. Sadly it is heritage and tradition that is lost. And that, that is what us " old folks " are looking for, what we miss. If only we had practiced more.
When I was sixteen I wasn't much of a rebel as far as social convention went. Yes, I rebelled against the " rules " my parents established for my behavior. I had to be home at a certain time, I was expected to mind my manners, be polite and courteous to my elders, certain fashions weren't to be worn, my hair was to be cut, things like that. I certainly wasn't one of the " cool " kids and didn't want to be labeled a nerd, so I tried to be a semi-tough guy! Thinking back I suppose that is what I was thinking anyway. Really it was a forced independence, although I was totally unaware of that. It would have been easier to just be cool. I wasn't about to allow anyone to bully me either. I had older siblings for that! Being the youngest and the smallest I was often victimized. That was in a time before survivors, no we just got even. No crying and complaining allowed. No one is going to help you, figure it out.
I see few of the people I grew up with these days. I stay in touch with some, an occasional phone call or some interaction on Facebook. I never did have a large circle of friends, that comes from not being the cool kid. I have to say the ones I did hang out with were all of the finest quality! Yes, I'd say we all shared common values. I have clung to those values, pretty much unchanged, by this modern world. I am becoming increasingly aware of a change in the culture of America. The things I'm hearing do remind me of fifty years ago, I heard much the same back then from the cool kids. Anti-establishment is what they called it back then. The Hippies were going to change the establishment to a culture of peace and love. Communes without communists! I wasn't fooled then and remain that way. Today they are saying, " woke. " To be woke means you are aware of social injustice and the inherent inequities in society. The implication being you are working towards the removal of these things, in other words, be cool man.
Not having been a member of that cool crowd I really don't know what happened with them. Occasionally I will meet or see someone in my age group, a baby boomer, that is still the cool kid. Sometimes described as, just an old hippie, they are often regarded as an amusement. I believe a part of that is because of their ever changing values. What I mean is, they are constantly changing in response to the culture. Fifty years ago we would have said, they're hip! When faced with some moral or ethical dilemma they just respond with , it's cool man, to each their own. The object is to not upset anyone, don't anger anyone, just, " be cool " dude.
There are, of course, advantages to being a cool kid. Popularity is that defining characteristic. You may receive accolades and praise based solely on that. Your actual contribution may be considerably less than other, not so popular people. It's like being the popular boss in a way, everyone likes him but productivity suffers. The best way I heard that described was, you know your doing your job when you see your name of the bathroom wall: followed by a string of less than favorable adjectives! Yeah, I've seen my name there for not being " cool. " I didn't make an exception to the rule. That was the most common reason for that.
Not breaking the rules. That is basically what I was taught. The rules were in place for the benefit of everyone. Sometimes the rules work in your favor, sometimes they don't. It was a lesson I learned early on. I also learned that everything isn't equal. In fact the only constant when it comes to living is that it will never be equal. An observation I have shared on several occasions is that everyone wants equality until they are treated equally. That's when the exceptions roll out. I still practice and believe the core values I was taught as a child. Yes, I rebelled during my teenage years, I modified and justified those values to suit my wants over the years. I'm human. I'm not perfect I'm still practicing. It's the practice that is most important. With the " cool kid " it's all about preaching. And the message must be contrary to the current culture. Different is better! But I have discovered better is recycled every few generations or so. Sadly it is heritage and tradition that is lost. And that, that is what us " old folks " are looking for, what we miss. If only we had practiced more.
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