There are certain moments, certain memories captured in our minds that we really can't share with others. They are those times when we say, you had to be there. I am often reminded of that when I try to relate some of those old stories to my wife. No matter how much I try to " set the stage " and put the situation into context, it comes up flat. The reason is simply because you did have to be there. This is almost always associated with a humorous incident. You don't seem to have the need to have been there if it is a sad thing. I wonder why that is ? Is it easier to relate to sadness than happiness ? Empathy is just easier to fake I think. Laughter has to be genuine. At least that is what I believe anyway. That is how it is with me. I can spot forced laughter a mile away. When someone expresses their sorrow or offers sympathy to me I accept that as genuine. Yes, there are times when I get a feeling that they may be mendacious. I just found that last word, it is a polite word for being dishonest. I do try to be polite when insulting others. But I am getting off the subject here.
This was brought to mind as I was trying to think about what to write. I have been making a conscious effort to avoid political posts and controversial subjects for just a bit. The only reason for that is at this point, at least with politics, I would be beating a dead horse as the saying goes. I've already had enough disagreement in that area. Yeah I touched upon the whole Transgender in the military issue but was non-committal. That was different for me, is it growth ? No, I don't believe that is the case, being indecisive isn't growth. I have written about most subjects, some more than once. I have found that I just don't have that many good stories to tell. A great number of them you would have had to been there to understand. If you need to provide a prologue the story will not be relatable. When telling a personal story the listener needs to know the characters. If I have to explain the characters the story will get lost.
As a person that really enjoys sharing my memories it is a difficult thing. Memories are kept alive by the sharing of them. Over time you do lose contact with those folks contained in some of your stories. It is when you lose those " personal " memories that a sense of sadness can overcome you. Whereas I do occasionally sit and chuckle at my personal memories I also feel a need to share them. When there is no one to share with, it is depressing. Nothing sadder to me than an untold story. Well that's not exactly true, sadder still is no one that understands your story. That is when you are alone. That is why we mourn the passing of our loved ones. Personal memories leave with them. Those closest to us share those " personal " memories, the little incidents and happenings in life that we shared with them. No one else understands. They were not insignificant moments, rather they formed the basis of your relationship with that person. That is exactly why we say, a personal friend.
It is a difficult, if not impossible thing to explain. How do you put those moments in context ? Perhaps if you were a screenwriter, playwright or novelist you could do that. I believe it would take at least that much to establish a foundation. Not many people have the ability to do that. Fewer still would have the patience to listen to it ! It would be a bit much for a chuckle. I thought I would tell you a story this morning but you know, you would have had to have been there ! It involved going to the bowling alley and seeing an old friend. She asked my friend and I, if we were married. We just looked at her smiled and responded with, no we just live together ! Then I reached over and took his hand ! You should have seen the look on her face ! Well, like I said, you had to be there. Time and context intermingle to create a good story. Sometimes it is just impossible to recreate that mixture.
This was brought to mind as I was trying to think about what to write. I have been making a conscious effort to avoid political posts and controversial subjects for just a bit. The only reason for that is at this point, at least with politics, I would be beating a dead horse as the saying goes. I've already had enough disagreement in that area. Yeah I touched upon the whole Transgender in the military issue but was non-committal. That was different for me, is it growth ? No, I don't believe that is the case, being indecisive isn't growth. I have written about most subjects, some more than once. I have found that I just don't have that many good stories to tell. A great number of them you would have had to been there to understand. If you need to provide a prologue the story will not be relatable. When telling a personal story the listener needs to know the characters. If I have to explain the characters the story will get lost.
As a person that really enjoys sharing my memories it is a difficult thing. Memories are kept alive by the sharing of them. Over time you do lose contact with those folks contained in some of your stories. It is when you lose those " personal " memories that a sense of sadness can overcome you. Whereas I do occasionally sit and chuckle at my personal memories I also feel a need to share them. When there is no one to share with, it is depressing. Nothing sadder to me than an untold story. Well that's not exactly true, sadder still is no one that understands your story. That is when you are alone. That is why we mourn the passing of our loved ones. Personal memories leave with them. Those closest to us share those " personal " memories, the little incidents and happenings in life that we shared with them. No one else understands. They were not insignificant moments, rather they formed the basis of your relationship with that person. That is exactly why we say, a personal friend.
It is a difficult, if not impossible thing to explain. How do you put those moments in context ? Perhaps if you were a screenwriter, playwright or novelist you could do that. I believe it would take at least that much to establish a foundation. Not many people have the ability to do that. Fewer still would have the patience to listen to it ! It would be a bit much for a chuckle. I thought I would tell you a story this morning but you know, you would have had to have been there ! It involved going to the bowling alley and seeing an old friend. She asked my friend and I, if we were married. We just looked at her smiled and responded with, no we just live together ! Then I reached over and took his hand ! You should have seen the look on her face ! Well, like I said, you had to be there. Time and context intermingle to create a good story. Sometimes it is just impossible to recreate that mixture.
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