Out loud

  Writing is a way of saying things out loud even when no one is listening. I think that is the reason I write so much and so often. It just doesn't seem like I'm talking to myself, although that is really what is happening. It's a delusion I allow for myself. By writing and posting to the world wide web I feel like I am talking to others. Occasionally I get a reply, often not very positive but that's alright, and occasionally words of encouragement. Neither is necessary as I will continue until I don't. It is that way with most things in life, something I have discovered over the years. I'll be alive until I ain't. Nothing much to be done about any of that. 

  There is very little I don't write about. I'm not writing these postings to be popular, to gain anything at all except perhaps some peace of mind. It's not good to keep things to yourself you know. Go ahead and get it off your chest is my advice. Some people pay great sums of money to professional listeners that in turn give then professional advice. I just laugh at that as I feel it is a bunch of nonsense. The only person that can control, modify, or alter your mental state is you. That's the bottom line. All the drugs prescribed don't cure a thing, just mask the symptoms. Stop taking the drugs and you will revert to your original state. 

  This morning , for example, I really didn't have an idea of what I wanted to write about. I decided to write about writing. I thought about why I wanted to write something and this is what I came up with. I do feel like I'm talking to myself the majority of the time. Sometimes I even argue with myself! But fortunately I'm not easily swayed in my opinions and rarely change them. If I did I might consider myself unstable. That wouldn't be good. I am consistent and the proof lies in these postings. Occasionally I go back and read them and have found what I was saying ten years ago isn't much different than what I'm saying today. Oh, some my say I'm in a rut, stubborn, refusing to learn and just backwards. 

  I'm thinking I'm just right. Right doesn't change over time, right is a constant. It really is like I said the other day, when someone tells you not to judge, what they mean is don't tell me I'm wrong. It's not my fault if your judgement is in error. I'm doing my best to correct that, you're welcome. Telling me not to judge is a judgement on your part. You're passing a judgement against me. I wonder why so many seem to forget that half the judgements passed are positive ones. Yes, judgement is a binary thing, good for one, bad for the other. Almost everything in life is a binary function. Even our most advanced computers operate on the binary system, yes and no. It's how things work. Really nothing very complex about any of it. 

  Everything I write I believe to be right. Why would I write something I believed to be wrong? So yes, I do believe I am right. There are times when I point out what I feel is wrong. That is called opinion. I have a lot of opinions. We all have a lot of opinions. Opinions come from judgements. In fact that is what the supreme does, issue an opinion. The highest court in the land and it doesn't judge anything, just issue their collective opinion on the legality of proposed or existing legislation. There is talk now of expanding that court, to gain a few more opinions. It isn't the first time and I'm certain it won't be the last. Well, the truth is everyone thinks their opinion is the correct one. I know I do.

  Am I always right? No, I'm not and I'm very much aware of that. The thing is however I was taught to live my life with conviction. What some will say believing in yourself. Self esteem or whatever you wish to call it. Self confident was, at one time, an admirable quality to have. Today those opposing that call it arrogance. I'm not a survivor, I'm a conqueror. That is my mindset. Telling the truth is never arrogant. That's my feeling on that. Others may not like it, may not agree with it, or even dispute that truth, but that doesn't mean I should stop telling the truth. 

 ‘The universe is transformation: life is opinion.’ – Marcus Aurelius