Thursday, May 24, 2018

Surprise

 Two months ago I had a bit of a medical emergency. After two days of complaining I went to the emergency room where I was informed I was having a heart attack. Well, who knew? It wasn't anything like I had seen on television, no clutching my chest and gasping in pain. Hollywood! But a stent was immediately put in place and three days later I went home. Things returned to normal in short order. The only things different are my diet, I have modified that, and I was given Cardiac Rehabilitation. Yes, I now have to go to the geriatric gym at the hospital! I've been using the treadmill, recumbent bicycles and other machines to test your cardiovascular fitness. I have lost nine pounds and feel great. I receive congratulations and support from the hospital staff, my wife and family. If I am going to die, I might as well die healthy! That's my new motto.
 It is remarkable what modern medicine can do. Despite all the complaints about insurance, costs, appointments, malpractice, and all of that, I commend them. For me, the procedure went wonderfully and there were no issues. You do have to do as you are told. It makes no sense to go to the doctor and then not follow his or her advice. I am trying a modified Mediterranean diet. Fruits, vegetables and whole grain breads. It is not an unpleasant thing, just different. You just have to make a choice, I really do believe you control what you eat and drink and I believe you can change that despite all the advertisers trying to just hawk " substitutes " that look and taste the same. To me it is like giving a drug addict a different drug and telling them they are cured! But don't get me started on all of that. Addiction is a choice, not a disease! If I remain overweight, out of shape and have poor cardio-vascular health that is my choice as well. I can change all of that. I really don't think there is any danger of me becoming a gym rat though, I've yet to understand why people do that sort of thing for enjoyment! I'd rather read a book, write a story or do something useful.  But apparently it has become a necessity. When I was younger I couldn't wait to grow up and live my life. So many exciting things I wanted to do and places to go. Well, I've gotten older that much is certain and now the struggle is not so much to live my life as it is to stay alive! A new perspective.
 I usually don't talk much about this stuff as nobody really wants to hear it. I will listen to others and  empathize but I wouldn't call it a stimulating discussion. If it didn't happen to you, it is rather boring. I quit smoking a number of years back but have never preached to anyone else about kicking the habit. For me that was just another choice I made. I didn't need patches, pills and support groups! What I needed to do was decide. I believe that is all any of us need. Now maybe you will decide you need those things to quit, nothing wrong with that either, but my point is you have to make the decision. Do what you need to do, for you. Now that I've had this little incident, and that is what it is in my mind, I need to decide what to do. I need to convince myself how serious a situation it was. For now I'm just doing what I am told. I'm just not one much for getting all fired up about things. Actors call it finding their motivation. That's what I need to find as well, my motivation. In almost all situations that motivation has to benefit the individual to be truly effective. To just , " do it for otters " usually isn't sufficient. Well unless those others are of some benefit to you!
 That's the way it works in the world, at least in my experience it does. Maybe not the most Christian or empathic of statements to make, but the truth. Truth isn't always a pleasant thing, but a necessity. We all have to do what we have to do. If you don't, you'll pay for it in the end. Wait, have I finally determined that I can't live forever? When I was younger I believed I would, truth is it wasn't that many years ago I still sorta believed that. Knowing something and accepting it are two different things. Yes there comes a point in your life when you have to accept mortality. Not just admit that it is inevitable, but accept that. It shouldn't be depressing. It should be something you are prepared for. I'm in no hurry, I've got time to work on it. I didn't think that work included a gym! Life is full of surprises. And that is what happened to me two months ago tomorrow, surprise ! Well you just never know do you?  
 
   

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