Honestly

  After writing yesterday's blog I learned more about "StoryWorth" from a friend. That is the name of the company offering that service. I also found that in its' basic form it is reasonably priced. Exchanging a few comments and questions about that I decided I would have one reservation about doing that. That reservation is that the one that gives you the gift also can see the reply you write in the e-mail sent to StoryWorth. I guess if I just purchased it for myself that could be avoided. But then that sort of defeats the purpose of the book as they advertise it. I'm supposed to be answering questions that someone else asks. But I do have the option of picking from pre-prepared questions. Whatever the case is it raises a concern for me. I just wouldn't want anyone to read that until I was finished with the book, or I'm finished, if you get my drift. 

  I mentioned to my friend that I had written a blog about my maternal grandmother some years back. I thought it was pretty good and a heartwarming tale. I shared that with my mother. She seldom read any of my blogs because she didn't use a computer, smart phone or any of that electronic stuff. Her reaction came as a complete surprise to me. She was livid! I mean I thought she would blow a gasket. I heard a few words from her that I had never heard before. As I said, I was completely caught off guard and unprepared for that. On the one hand I felt bad because I had upset her and on the other hand, I hadn't said anything bad about her. It's been years now and I'm still perplexed about her reaction. 

  I've thought about it many times since. I asked my brother about it, and he offered no explanation. He seemed as baffled as I was. It makes me ask a question. Can you ever really be 100% honest with anyone? I mean just say what it is your thinking, tell your truth without hedging a thing? I'm thinking about everything, the little things as well as the major ones. Honesty is always the best policy but not always the best choice. Think, does this make me look fat, or look at this picture I drew. That's when we break out what we call a white lie. They are harmless lies told to save someone's feelings. Our opinions can certainly cause others to get upset. Our analysis of a situation can do the same. And that's where the issue comes in for me. If I were to write that story, I would tell it the way I see it, and some people might get upset. I wouldn't want to upset anyone with my stories and observations. As I discovered you just never know what the reaction may be. 

  The purpose of that book is to leave a record of sorts. It is the telling of your life through your eyes. If I'm not telling everything I saw for fear of hurting feelings the book is incomplete. I'm not talking about telling the dirt, exposing secrets and scandals, just the plain truth as I see it. I'm aware that comes at a risk. If what I write displeases others it may impact my legacy. That's a rather pompous statement, isn't it? My legacy.  

 It is more like my opinion, and opinions are like anus's, everyone has one. Sometimes they stink! I'm also aware that whatever I did write would certainly not make a large impact as it wouldn't affect many people. Still, I'm attempting to leave "me" behind. I want to leave the real me. That's the issue. How honest can you be? It's not about keeping secrets; it's about sharing insights. We don't all have the same understanding even when we share the same experience. How to decide which insight to share and which opinion to keep to yourself is the challenge. Things is, it shouldn't be a challenge at all. My insight is judged by you to be an opinion. In my opinion you are lacking insight. Just what is the truth? And just how much of that should you share? They say dead men tell no tales. Not if I write that book. I expect it is safer that way, at least a lot less drama. Death is a dramatic thing! Anything I would write won't trump that. Honestly, what's the worst that could happen?