what it is

  I keep hearing stories on television about mental health. I hear about all the programs and proposals offered to help people cope. These stories are often in-between stories about trans people or those that self-identifying as something other than what they really are. The messages are conflicting in my eyes. I'm upset because you said something that offended me. I should then be provided with counseling, professional help in coping with that. That's after you are punished in some way for saying it in the first place. No mental help for you though, you are simply wrong! That's the way it is even when the simple truth is told. If you were a man yesterday, you are still a man today. That's a simple fact. I get called names for pointing that fact out. I'm supposed to ignore that and change your pronoun. I won't apologize for that. In fact, the professionals have a name for it, Cognitive Dissonance. It's something that has been studied in psychological circles and theories abound. Basically, what it boils down to is believing in something that simply isn't true. You know it isn't true, but you still believe it, like I'm a guy but really, I'm a girl. I feel like I'm a girl in contradiction to all the evidence to the contrary. 

  I'm no phycologist or psychiatrist, I just sound like one on Facebook. I'm Ok, You're Ok. But that isn't the truth all the time, there are times when I'm OK and you're not! I recognize delusional thinking and pipe dreams. I'm aware that changing pronouns will only enable your cognitive dissonance to flourish. Not wishing to be an enabler I will not participate in the charade. Now those folks need mental help from a professional. Cognitive Dissonance can be a serious problem. It's true the official handbook of mental disorders doesn't list cognitive dissonance as a disorder, but it can lead to mental disorders such as depression, dysphoria and anxiety. That happens when the cognitive dissonance is frequent and reenforced by others. Yes, we all feel a bit of cognitive dissonance from time to time, it is perfectly normal. When we refuse to recognize that dissonance for what it is that's when we get into trouble.

 Now with all the ads and awareness on mental health these days what symptoms are the most frequently mentioned? Depression and anxiety top the list. No one is mentioning dysphoria because that would cause a bit of an issue. Gender dysphoria can be a mental disorder. That's what the handbook says anyway. If that dysphoria causes you discomfort, depression, and to withdraw from society then it's a problem. Seems to me we have now decided if you can't beat them, join them. Is that really helping the individual with the problem? We will all just pretend, go along with that, and that makes everything ok?   Interesting how we are now attempting to treat everyday life, living, with an array of "medications" designed to reduce these feelings of cognitive dissonance. It's all a part of this "immediate gratification" society we find ourselves in today. Everything has to happen right now! There is no getting over it, that takes too much time and effort, now we just medicate it! If you can't feel it, it isn't real. If that's what you feel, it must be real. And that is what we are doing right now. Upset at work, feeling a bit of anxiety or stress? There are meds for that, and some companies provide mental health days as well. Are you nervous around other people? There is a medication for that. Anytime you aren't feeling just right, it's a mental problem. The truth is it always has been a mental problem. It's called being human. 

 The more we medicate human emotions the more problems we create. In the past we relied on something else, something we called maturing. As we grew up, we began to recognize these periods of cognitive dissonance. We learned to get over it, as the saying goes. We learned how to cope with these contradictory feelings. I didn't feel like it, I didn't even see the need for it, but I made my bed in the morning. I was polite to others. I had times when I felt like others just didn't like me, didn't want to be my friend, teased me, bullied me and called me names. I learned how to deal with all of that without medications! Nor did anyone in authority insist others comply with my wants or desires. Maturing took time, it didn't happen overnight with a pill. For some that maturity never really arrived, we all have friends like that. 

  Keep telling everyone they have a mental problem, and they will have a mental problem. It's good for business I suppose, a convenient excuse for your choices and behaviors. I can't help it! I need counseling and probably some kind of medication. And you can't question any of that! No, you can never question that and any actions you take had best support that. That is to say, give me time off from work for my mental health, provide me with a soothing and relaxing workspace, allow me to decorate my cubicle or play music whatever it takes. You can't tell me how to dress or how to groom myself. That may interfere with my mental wellbeing. You must comply with this, I'm taking medication! It's a mental thing. Life is a mental thing! And some of you have problems, big problems. But they could be cured. All you have to do is grow up! You can begin by accepting reality. It is what it is! If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, quacks like a duck and smells like a duck, it's a duck. Doesn't matter if the duck identifies as an Eagle, it's still a duck.