shadows cast

 Some time back I wrote down this thought, " dreams are the shadows cast by possibilities. " I rather like the idea of that. I believe we dream about what is possible. At the same time we need to separate that from what is probable. We should work toward the probabilities, and dream of the possibilities. The struggle is to recognize one from the other. Man has made great achievements that can't be denied. In the areas of science, the arts, and technology we have, as a species, dominated the world. Some would say we have dominated to the point of destroying! There is evidence to support that opinion, although I don't believe that.
 Is man capable of destroying the world? Yes, certainly we are. That became evident when we unlocked the awesome power of the atom. When we figured out how to make a " big bang. " Problem being our big bangs sole purpose is to destroy, not create. Creation is left to whom? That is where man fails miserably. We may dream of that possibility, but the probability is very low. I say that because  duplicating something isn't the same as creating it? For me, in my thinking, God alone has the patent on creation. The best man can hope to do is, duplicate.
 Now we may indeed figure out a way to " manufacture " the parts we need to restore our bodies. We could grow new limbs and organs. It seems like a possibility. The concept of cloning seems viable, it has been accomplished with animals. But even that was just a duplication, and not a very good one. There were flaws in the process. We haven't cloned a human being; yet. Will we? Yes I believe at some point we will try that too. Given the moral direction I see the country heading, I can't see any other path. If we decide we can " kill " and that is a moral choice,  how could creating life be an immoral one? That is a logical course of reasoning. The question for me is, if we clone a human being, will that duplicate have a soul? That is the big mystery isn't it? Or will that duplicate only react to the world the way it is taught to react, lacking a soul?
 First we have to decide whether your conscience and your soul are the same thing. I say they are closely related but not the same thing. Our soul is created at birth, it is a gift from our creator. Our conscience is formed by the world around us. That is the only explanation I can offer. If I grew up in a society, in a world where stealing was a part of the culture would my conscience bother me? No, I don't think it would. I may know, inherently, that it is wrong. What teaches me that? I'd say it was our soul. That is what is given to us, as a gift. The choice to use it or not is ours. What we call free will. Our soul conveys those unalienable rights we Americans are so proud of. So does the rest of the world, no matter how they define that. Can a soul be duplicated? No, I just don't think that is a possibility. Man has tried to manipulate the choices people make. We call it mental health. Success, I would say, has been limited at best. Even after thousands of years we still have " self-help " because we just don't know what to do. We can medicate, alter responses artificially, again with limited success, we can punish, rehabilitate, offer religious instruction and institutionalize! Still, people do bad things, things contrary to the soul. They do so by choice. And man, in his arrogance, still attempts to control that.
 And what has that to do with my thought, " dreams are the shadow cast by possibilities. " I think we should work toward what is probable. That is what I'm thinking. The probability of changing human nature is non-existent. We need to bear that in mind when making our choices and decisions. It's a beautiful dream to think otherwise. To " have faith " in humanity. It is the dream Martin Luther King Jr. spoke of. He spoke eloquently of working toward that dream. He also knew it had to begin with probabilities, possibilities will follow that. " Every man lives in two realms, the internal and the external. The internal is that realm of spiritual ends expressed in art, literature, morals, and religion. The external is that complex of devices, techniques, mechanisms, and instrumentalities by means of which we live. " ( Martin Luther King, Jr. ) I say the internal is what is given to us as a gift, the external is just the medium in which we work.
 In reading a bit of what Martin Luther King, Jr had to say I stumbled upon another quote of his. " Everything that we see is a shadow cast by that which we do not see. " I just saw that for the first time this morning. I'd suggest to the Dr. that it is we that are casting the shadows. 

What is " it "

 It's a frequent saying, we hear it all the time, America, love it or leave it.  It's a sentiment I agree with wholeheartedly. Yesterday, possibly for the first time, I questioned just what is America? That is what we are told to love but how to define that. That is central to the question isn't it? Really just what is America? Is it a dream as some would say or is it reality? I'd have to say it is more dream than reality. At least the portion of America that I love is. The land of the free and the home of the brave. You do have to be brave to live free! Perhaps it is that reality that is being lost. I mean how brave do to you have to be to be dependent upon government for everything? When government becomes a safety net, funded by the taxpayers, are we really free?
 When I speak of dependence I mean not solely financial dependence. I am talking about obtaining permission for just about everything and anything you wish to do. Government is controlling our lives and that isn't freedom. Government is restricting our freedom! No longer can you venture into the wilderness and carve out a piece for yourself and your family. The government owns 640 million acres of land. Let that number set in, 640 million acres, about 28% of the total area of the United States , not counting Alaska. That figure is in stark contrast to what the Constitution says. The government is only supposed to own enough land to erect buildings for government and military installations. That's about it. Look it up, So just how come the government owns so much land? Just how did that happen? It's about control.
 Yes I agree we need government. You can't have a nation without laws and ultimate authority. There are those members of society that need restraining. Anyone from the extremely wealthy to the mentally disturbed can create problems. Not all people are moral and virtuous. I know, but that is what we expect from an American. That is this dream we call America. In America the population is a moral and virtuous peoples! And that is where the dream ends. How do you define what is moral, what is virtuous? In America we say, In God we Trust, and that is an affirmation of our moral standard. I would say that is being dismissed in modern times, replaced by what? Where do we place out trust? In the law, in government?
 I offer no answers. I only offer my thoughts. America, Love it or Leave it. The question is; what is " it. " Is America freedom or security? Is it both? What is freedom? What is security? What is America? I believe America is the grand experiment in human nature. We have been given all the proverbial rope we want. Looks to me like we are going to hang ourselves with it. When Government replaces God, America will be lost. And I say that because I think too many fail to understand what God is. God is moral and virtuous behaviors. Those behaviors stem from nature and as Thomas Jefferson stated, natures God. You can't explain God. The challenge we face is to have government co-exist with God. That's the dream; always was. That is what brought us here in the first place. 

Disco killed Dance

 Had one of those random thoughts last evening. I wondered, do kids dance today? What I mean is I haven't heard anything about any new dances lately. Thinking about it I can't remember hearing much of anything about new dances since Disco. Did Disco kill dance? Yeah I heard about " Hammer Time " and " Gangnam "  style but that's about it. Well I guess there was line dancing for a while. I guess I'm just not up on this stuff. My grandkids go to the school dances but they say they don't dance, just stand around a lot. Sounds like me at the school dance. But, like I say, I haven't heard of any dance crazes like you used to.
 I was never much of a dancer. I never learned how to do any actual structured dance, like the waltz or the foxtrot. With me it was just hold on and try to follow me around. Dance, for me, is more about the holding than the moving. Still we had the twist, the peppermint twist, the frog, the monkey, the mashed potato and all of those. I never learned the hustle, as I hate Disco, or any other dances. I heard about them though. The whole country line dance thing I was aware of. But you expected me to remember a series of moves, coordinated with a group, while drinking beer? Ain't gonna happen skippy! I guess there are still people doing that and I applaud them. It has to be like square dancing, maybe not so cool anymore but I know how to do that. Ye hah!
 I wonder did dance decline with the beginning of rock and roll? It was at that time we kids just started doing our own thing. There weren't any structured dances, you just did whatever you felt like. I was never very comfortable with that as I don't think my dance moves are very polished or smooth. Looks more like I have a pebble in my shoe or I'm dodging bullets. The very reason I stick to the slow dances. Of course that didn't work so well in high school. you had to ask the girl to dance and if it was a slow dance that had implications and well, you know. Spent more time thinking about asking than dancing was the result. Following my high school years the Disco thing took off. I hated it and still do. I mean, c'mon you expect me to dress like that and do the hustle? I'm thinking Disco killed dance! After Disco people just stopped! Kids that is, they just stopped and I can't blame them. The generation following Disco wasn't having any of that, and they weren't cool enough for real rock and roll. My generation owns that! Kids still haven't recovered from Disco's damaging effects.
 Seriously though, I was wondering about all of that. Just what dances do the kids today do? How come you don't hear about it? We had Bandstand and Soul Train. Then MTV showed up. I remember seeing that in its' early days, it was pretty cool. Now there are plenty of music video shows to watch. Not one holds the prestige of an American Bandstand or Soul Train! Dick Clark and Don Cornelius, icons in the music and dance world of my youth. What do these kids have today? Boy bands? Seems that is all I hear about. Makes sense, it is girl music, not that masculine driving beat of Rock and Roll Baby! You know, when we got down with our bad self! Kids today just ain't got no soul.
 Don McLean wrote American Pie about the day the music died. I'm not a songwriter but if I could I'd write, the death of dance. Disco killed dance for the American teen will it ever be revived? Maybe one day it will make a comeback. I'm not certain though, Disco was fatal! Was it those Boogie nights? Maybe it was just that the pants were too tight! 

what are you doing?

 As I wrote about the other day I received a letter from an old friend. In that letter he asked, what are you doing these days? It was a good question and one I have been giving thought too. I'm afraid I don't have much of an answer. The question is really asking, what are you doing for others. At least that is the way I hear it. I believe you are supposed to be a contributor in this world. I can think of no other reason for being here. I am here by divine providence. That being established I would have to believe it is for a reason wouldn't I? It is something to consider. So, just what have I been doing these days?
 I get up in the morning, drink coffee and write a blog. That is how my days usually begin. Following that routine, my day is open. I find little household projects to occupy myself or help others when asked. Mostly I just do stuff for the kids and the grandkids. It's pretty slow this time of year. I have no grass to mow, no outdoor projects. I have no outdoor activities that interest me either. I don't fish in the cold. I was never one much for hunting, not that I object to that in any way, just not that interesting to me. It is easier to hunt indoors, at the grocery store. So just what am I doing? Not much. That's the only response I can think of. I'm left with the feeling that I should be doing something, but what? That is the question I am pondering at the moment. It doesn't seem right that I just do the things I want to do, for the most part, I am married, so. I've heard that I've earned it, that you have done your part. Somehow that doesn't settle with me. I'm still here, I should be contributing.
 In the past, when I was working, that contribution was acknowledged by compensation. I received a pay check. I was doing whatever to help someone else. In return I was compensated with money. That's the way it works. It's the only way I know that it works anyway. Yes I could say I was providing for my family, take credit for that. It was fulfilling an obligation. An obligation I wholeheartedly embrace. That's what I was doing. Simple enough to understand. I was doing something.
 Now I'm not one to run out and volunteer to do something just to say I'm doing it. That attitude won't satisfy me. I simply couldn't volunteer to claim being a volunteer. Do you know what I mean? I can't be disingenuous. It would have to be something I really wanted to do, for myself, without compensation. And that is the rub. It's not an easy thing to admit too, certainly not a virtue, but it is the truth. I seldom do anything without some expectation of compensation. Yes, I know, you can do things to just make yourself feel good, and that is compensation enough. I admit to having done that. Is that compensation? More importantly, is that contributing? Can you contribute to yourself? That seems to be the central question in my mind this morning. Is it alright to just do what you want, as long as the wife allows it?
 I can say I am retired. When asked,  that is the usual response. I'm retired. Retired from what though? Whatever occupation I was employed in is the answer. Does retirement relieve you of the obligation to contribute? I don't believe that it does. The expenditure of your life requires prudence and thrift. It would seem only reasonable given the magnitude of that gift, a gift we call life. After all, if you are a Christian you believe one life was expended to save all of humanity. Now that was a contribution! The point being it was a life well spent. And that begs the question, how are you spending yours? What are you doing?  As for me, I'm uncertain at the moment. I'm okay with that. I'll figure it out. Until that time I'll just keep on dong what I do, whatever that is.  

about tomorrow

 I have been trying to write a book for quite a while now. Its' a task I have no idea how to do, so I just started writing. I see there are book writing courses you can take online. There are even apps to do that, just fill in the blanks. None of that interests me because I want to tell the story my way. I have no expectation of being a commercial success with my writings. It's not an occupation, just a pastime. 

 I was working on it a bit yesterday when I got frustrated once again. That happens often, I'm used to it. I get frustrated after proof reading portions. It is then I decide the whole thing sounds like an introduction and doesn't have any real substance yet. So, I set it aside and occupy my mind with social media or some mindless television show. I get to thinking about what it is I'm trying to write. That has to be the issue, I'm just not certain what it is I'm trying to say. It is more of a rambling narrative than a structured story. And then I think is that the way my life has been so far? Yes, I think it fair to say I haven't lived a very focused life. I also don't think there is a thing wrong with that. I have fulfilled at least the basic requirements. I've had a lot of fun and few regrets. But then again, we need both to be balanced. Grounded is what they call it, being grounded. I'm thinking I have always flown just a little above the ground, not soaring but definitely not grounded. 

 It has occurred to me that if you wanted to write a novel the best way to do that would be to write what you expected life to be. I'm thinking if I wrote what I thought the results of my actions were going to be,  instead of what actually happened, that would make a great story. I think that may be true with us all. I do know the journey thus far isn't at all what I was expecting. Was it a lack of planning on my part? Yes I suppose you would have to say it was. We do get to choose, to a point. Things happen, that can't be denied, how we react to them is a choice though. 

 I noticed that this posting will be number three thousand. That's a bunch of words. Is there a book in all of that? I'm thinking there may be. What type of book would that be? I don't think it would be a novel, I don't see a story in there. A self-help book? Hardly, I can't help myself,  let alone others. I've never really understood the concept of a self help book in the first place. Isn't the purpose to help yourself? If so, why are you trying to do what someone else tells you to do? See my point there? Whatever floats your boat though. I was told that God helps those who help themselves and subscribe to that theory.  It means to exercise self initiative and work hard. It isn't a Biblical thing, it's not in the Bible,  just old advice. Aesop's fables illustrate this principle. You remember Aesop don't you?

 Each morning I attempt to write something, the hope being, someone else will enjoy it. Really it is a form of therapy for myself. It is a selfish endeavor. It is more of a public journal of my thoughts than anything else. I still keep my private thoughts, private. The reason for that has nothing to do with being afraid or ashamed of those thoughts or ideas, it has to do with maturity. The maturity of the thought or idea that is, not the writer. 

 So this morning I have written a few paragraphs about nothing. It isn't the first time and certainly not the last. It is just the act of writing that I enjoy, trying to pry my thoughts loose. It is something I've noticed, it is beneficial to view those thoughts at a distance. Get a new perspective so to speak. Putting those thoughts on the computer does that. In the old days we did that with pen and paper. I admit this way is much easier. Not sure if it is better. Posting number three thousand. An accomplishment? No, I wouldn't say that. It isn't a goal I set out to reach. I wonder, if you start looking at the end, does that mean the end is close? 

 Now reading over this post it comes off as a bit melancholy. Strange, that isn't the way I'm feeling. Contemplative is what I would say. I'm just thinking about stuff. It doesn't mean I'm committed to that stuff. I was hoping I would have something profound to say this morning, it being number three thousand and all, but that's not the case. Guess I'll have to keep on writing. Tomorrow is another day, after all. Isn't that what Scarlett O'Hara said? I'll worry about it tomorrow. 

the best things

 Yesterday I went to the mail. I mean the actual mail box, on a post by the side of the road. I've noticed over the years how it contains more advertisements and offers than actual correspondence. E-mail has taken a decided advantage. I admit I prefer it myself, most times. But yesterday I was so pleased to withdraw from that cavern a letter. It was an actual hand written letter from an old friend. It was like shaking his hand just to hold it. I looked at the return address and was a little afraid. My first thought was something bad may have happened. That was followed by a whole string of thoughts and possibilities. It was exciting in a way. an anticipation. I went upstairs to my apartment to read.
 Opening this letter with my pocketknife, I don't own a letter opener, I unfolded it. There it was, in his own hand, my friend speaking to me. I'm impressed. You just don't get many handwritten letters these days. I realize the time and effort required to accomplish that. I write things out in script to stay in practice and hopefully improve its' legibility. I am curious about what he has to say. To my relief I discover there is nothing wrong, the only thing that has happened is life. It has been many years since I last saw my friend Bill. We were both much younger then. And it was our youth that he wrote about with fondness. I too have good memories of those days. Old friends share secrets. They are the secrets of youth and discovery, of learning life's lessons. Each of our friends contribute to who we become, some more than others. Without getting overly dramatic Bill made a significant contribution. I am grateful.
 Over the years we went our separate ways pursuing life, as people do. We would exchange a phone call, or share a Christmas card. I would hear news of him from other mutual friends. I was pleased to hear of his successes and sad when I heard of his losses. Each of us living our lives and doing the best we can. Time, choices and circumstance have separated us. We like, no need, to believe, that had we stayed in close proximity to each other that the friendship would have just continued as it was. I wonder if that is so. Not because of my friend, but because of me. I'm certainly not the same person I was in 1970. Maybe its' presumptuous of me but I feel like I have matured, experienced personal growth as the experts call it. I'm equally certain my friend has as well. How smoothly that would have went together I'm not so sure. Ah, but that is life isn't it? And Bill was in my life, a part of it, a contributor, and that can never be denied or dismissed.
 This morning I thank Bill for writing. I thank him for taking the time. Time as we all know is our most precious commodity. I was anxious to answer his letter. I admit I sent him e-mail. I took the easiest and fastest route. I will write him a letter real soon. Some time back I went in search of stationary, you know that stuff you write letters on, and found it difficult to locate. I remember when gift sets of that were common enough. I found it a challenge to compose an e-mail to him, what to say. As much as I enjoy the old memories, the old stories, I wonder who he is today? I worry he may not like who I am today. Have you ever thought such of old friends you haven't seen or been with for years? Are we the same people? Seems to me only memories remain the same, everything else is subject to change. But there is something, a voice, an intuition that tells me otherwise. I hear that Bill is just the same. A friend. And that is one of the best things a person can be.  Thanks Bill, good to hear from you.       

passionately dramatic

 Passion and drama. Are they the same thing? There is a subtle difference there isn't there? We all would like to experience passion, not sex, passion for living, passion for a cause or whatever. At the same time we all hope to avoid the drama! But there are those that cannot distinguish between the two. This is becoming more and more of an issue every day. It is the only explanation I can think of to explain the behavior of some people. When something angers or disturbs them they claim to be passionate about changing whatever caused that anger or disruption. The truth is, they are just mad and feeding off the drama. They just don't get it, it is the drama that is causing the issue. Could be they have gotten that idea from the daytime drama's, otherwise known as soap operas. Remember when they were so popular? Remember how even the ones that enjoyed watching them were aware that it was just a show? Well, that has changed. I'd say the soaps aren't near as popular as they used to be. Times change and they are old school. But they have been replaced. What replaced them? Reality shows! That's what they are called and those shows are no more a reflection of reality than the soaps are. The appeal is what? Drama. that's the appeal. Drama being disguised as a " passion " for whatever it is the show is highlighting.
 If you are not passionate or dramatic what are you? Stoic is a good answer. New Englanders were noted for being a stoic people. That began with the arrival of the Puritans and their religious beliefs and practices. Keep your nose to the grindstone, guard your soul against evil, and do what is pleasing to the lord! To be stoic is to accept reality unflinchingly without question. Does that mean a stoic person lacks passion? Certainly not, it just means the stoic person does not expose their feelings, passion or drama, in an outward way. I believe it stems from self confidence, a strength of conviction on their part. That is stoicism. Yeah I admit it is not much fun. It is more a matter of fact. I'm not much of a stoic, although I try to be. Ideally one wouldn't be reactive, but rather considered in his or her response. Considered responses seldom get the headlines though. That is also a part of the issue. We all like attention. For me, my biggest heroes didn't draw attention to themselves, but are the quiet heroes of everyday life. No great passion, no great drama, they just did what needed to be done and responded to situations in a reasonable and considered fashion. What we commonly call, keeping your cool. Aren't many staying cool these days. At least that is my assessment.
 As I said I'm not much of a stoic although I would like to be. To be stoic is to control your emotions. Nowadays they call that mental health. The modern answer is to medicate, whether by prescription or " self help. " This is especially true in the push to legalize pot. Smoke a bowl dude and chill. Yeah, smoke enough, and you will definitely be chill. The narrative is about the health benefits and I don't doubt there are some chemical compounds in that weed that will give some relief. That is just the narrative however, not the story. The story is we are trying to escape reality. Man has always done that in some form or another. Mostly through some religious practice. It hasn't worked yet! Now we are starting to abandon the religious practices altogether and go directly to the escape. That's why all the drama and passion! Emotions are great motivators! Thing is, as any stoic knows, emotions are usually bad at decision making. Emotions are just too volatile for that and have aa tendency to blow up in your face.
 Somewhere between passion and drama lies the answer. That is the home of reality. All these people proposing alternatives to reality. I say, there isn't any alternative to reality, that's why it is real! You had best learn to deal with and accept reality. If you do not your life will be filled with passion and drama. It's exhausting. The reason we all want to chill , right?  You can't medicate it away. I also want to add something I shared before, " accept history for what it was, not for what you wish it could have been. " 

occupied

 There are mornings when I find myself occupied. What I mean is my thoughts are not centered on a single subject, but occupied with several things. Actually it is an inability to focus on a single thought. The reason for that is a mystery. I'm just wandering around, looking for trouble I guess. At least that is what Mom would say when she found you doing nothing, you're just looking for trouble. I can see the logic in that statement today, perhaps that comes with age. I would say it isn't so much as looking for trouble as pointing out faults! That is what we all tend to do, point out the faults as we see them. We do so because we don't know what else to do. That's true for me anyway, I can't really speak for others. I do so with no expectation of change even though I'm shaking things up, looking for trouble. 

 Most mornings I wake up, give it a little thought and begin to write. This morning is one of those where that didn't happen easily. It's certainly not the first time and I expect will not be the last. This morning I reached into my files and pulled out some older blogs, thought I might update them. I read a few but found I had already said what I wanted to say and had no desire to change them. In a way it is comforting to know my conclusions haven't changed but in another troubling. Aren't we told we should continue growing? Aren't we told that if we don't change we have become stagnant? Should my views change? 

 Then I justify the lack of change with the thought, truth doesn't change. But is that the truth? Are only verifiable facts the truth? Is science the only way to determine truth? I can see that philosophy and understand the logic. Science does attempt to prove everything, including the beginning of life. Is this possible? I don't believe it is. Science may provide an explanation, science may even be able to reproduce an event, but can science create intelligence? And in my way of thinking it is intelligence that created everything in the first place. Intelligent order in the universe could not happen by chance. It had to happen as a result of intelligent design. That's a truth that doesn't change. That and those truths the founding fathers described as " unalienable rights. " Those truths haven't changed since the birth of man and never will. 

 Is faith dependent upon truth, or is truth dependent upon faith? I think the answer you provide to that question tells you a great deal about yourself. You do have to be completely honest though, no cheating. It is a question central to humanity. If you believe it, is it true? It is to you, if you really believe it. If I  believe something does that make it the truth? I'd say it makes it possible. Aren't we taught to believe. Believe in yourself and all things are possible. In belief we find salvation. That is true. Is it true because we believe it, or because we have faith? 

 The answer for me,  faith is dependent upon truth. It is dependent upon what I believe to be the truth. And I believe faith requires no proof. Does truth change? No, I don't think it does. What I believe may change, altering my belief, but that doesn't change the truth. That is where faith enters the equation. It's a lot to think about, that's why I'm occupied!   

a boy no more

 It happened on a Tuesday eighteen years ago today. I became a grandfather! That's right I've been a grandfather for eighteen years now. Yeah, I know it's my grandsons birthday, but I became a grandfather. So this day is really all about me. What? Wait a minute I'm not a millennial but that is the logic they might use. Mark, that's my grandson is technically a millennial. He was born the 388th day of a new millennium. That was January the 23, 2001. Mark is far from the stereo typical image we have formed of what a millennial is. No sir, Mark is old school cool. A member of the honor society throughout his school career, a student athlete, member of the Wesleyan church and a defender of freedom! A true Patriot. And today, today he will register for the draft. A boy no more, today he is 18 years old! And me, I'm still a grandfather.
 I have had the pleasure, the joy, the privilege to have accompanied Mark on his voyage this far. Not many days have gone by when I didn't see him or at least speak with him. I've watched him grow and marked the milestones for him. With my trusty camera I have documented achievements and defeats. I have a lifetime of memories with him, his whole lifetime so far in fact. We often think of lifetime as an end, but it is not, it is just the time to the present moment. I'll be seeing him after school  today. It will be different though, he'll be eighteen then. Well, almost as he was born near five o'clock in the evening on that Tuesday. Grandma and I will be with him when that happens, the birth of year eighteen for him. We will welcome it in together, just as we did the first. And yes, we baked a cake.
 It is a reminder how quickly the years slip past. It's Mark's birthday, he's eighteen. I've seen him go from infant to toddler to juvenile and now to manhood. I've watched and encouraged every step. I remember when he was small, I remember being afraid. Afraid that he might get hurt in some fashion, I was afraid for him in a way I hadn't been afraid for my sons. It was a fear born of aging and wisdom. A grandparents fear. Perhaps it stems from a parents folly, who knows? But anyone that is a grandparent knows the feeling. Where you allowed your children to ride their bicycles to the store, or allowed them to play football without second thought or trepidation, with the grandchildren you worry. I have paused with sadness at a thought, the thought of my grandchild being sick or hurt in some way.
 So today I mark another milestone. My life is intertwined with my grandson. It could be no other way and I am blessed beyond measure. In a short time, high school will end for him and a new course plotted. The plan is to go to college to study for the law. That's the plan today anyway. It's taken a lifetime to get here. To say I couldn't be prouder to be his grandfather is an understatement of momentous proportions. I could write chapters about his accomplishments but suffice to say, he's the best. A young man. Just how did that happen. It was all his doing, he made me a grandfather. Yeah okay, his Mom and Dad helped but I'm responsible for what Dad did sooo. Happy Birthday Mark.
 I haven't told him yet but he has another job to do. After College, after law school, after marriage, he has to make me a great-grandfather! Hey, that's what grandchildren do you know. Grandchildren keep us alive and carry us forward. Generation after generation. He's eighteen today and all of that can happen in less time than that. How's that for perspective? Yes I have granddaughters that can make me a great grandfather but my hope is they will wait for another 25 years or so! They are only sixteen now. Forty seems about right to have babies. LOL
 Something I have learned, a grandparents fear is an expression of love. I can think of no word for that. Doting is often what others would use, but that isn't accurate. Love isn't a doting thing. A grandparents fear is for the loss that may happen to another! The fear isn't for yourself. It just feels like it is. 

in the same boat

 Yesterday was MLK day. Martin Luther King is best known for his dream speech. It was a good one. It is one of those speeches that will live on in the hearts of men forever for its' powerful message and imagery. You will hear him referred to as Dr. King. Do you know what he had a doctorate in? It was in Philosophy. A doctorate of philosophy in systemic theology. Just what is that you ask? It is an attempt to explain all questions and problems related to human life. Famous philosophers that would have held that same degree today are, Plato, Aristotle and Descartes. So yes, it s a legit title. He was awarded that degree in 1955 from Boston University. The title most applied to him is activist. He was that, no doubt about that. Best known for his march on Washington and delivering that dream speech it was a call for action. And I would certainly agree with the Doctor, changes are necessary. I'd also agree with the Doctor that dreams must be fulfilled by your own actions, your dreams should not be reliant upon others to fulfill them. 

 What is less known, or at least less spoken about is his childhood. Yes he did attend segregated schools. So did every other child of color during that time frame in the south. What isn't mentioned often is that he lived in what is called the Sweet Auburn section of Atlanta, Ga. That neighborhood was home to the wealthiest and most influential black people in the country. In short, it was a high class neighborhood. His family was well to do. Far from any imagery you may have of a poor black child struggling in a segregated schoolhouse, he was an outstanding student in a very nice school. Does the fact that it was a segregated school make it less of a school? I'd say no more so than segregated schools in white neighborhoods. Yes, it's true there are rich and poor people, rich and poor neighborhoods in all communities, regardless of the color of your skin. They were, and still are, poorly staffed, underfunded schools in America. My only point being, Martin Luther King Jr. grew up in a world of privilege.

 Yes, I know he was black, he knew he was also but didn't use that as an excuse for anything. His world of privilege certainly didn't extend as far as a white child of equal wealth and social position would have. That can't be denied in any fashion. Prejudice is very real. That was proven without a doubt by James Earl Ray when he shot and killed King in 1968. Still we must remember he was raised by wealthy, educated parents and attended Morehouse University and eventually receives a degree, a doctorate no less, from Boston University. I wonder what other occupation a Doctor of Philosophy in Systemic Theology could pursue besides teacher or activist? Especially so in 1955 America. The reality is, he was a black man. The Doctor was well aware of that as well. That he chose to inspire instead of complain, is a tribute to his character. And that is where the philosophical part enters into this discussion. Would he have been the same had his family been poor, living in a poor neighborhood? Was Dr. King a product of good luck and fortune? Does it matter?

 No, I don't think it does matter. What matters is results. Is that to say the ends justify the means? Ah, that's another discussion altogether isn't it? That discussion would certainly involve theological aspects as well as legal ones. It is a subject in the realm of Dr. King for sure. Martin Luther King Jr. called for peaceful protest. He spoke of the content of your character, not the color of your skin. Was he able to do that, to understand that, because he had a privileged childhood? To be clear, he could afford to believe that because he didn't have to live in any other way? And belief can be dependent upon your financial position, social status, and political leanings. It is also easier to preach than to believe! That is also another topic of discussion for another day. 

 In 1986 the United States designated the first Monday in January as Martin Luther King, Jr. day, a federal holiday. There are no traditions associated with this yet. It is a fairly new holiday after all. I believe the intent was to remind us all of what can be accomplished through non-violent means and civil disobiendence. I think the lesson should be, civil disobiendence doesn't include rioting or intimidating others! I hope that is what comes to pass. I don't think that is the lesson being taught however. They emphasis seems to be that he was killed by a white man because of prejudice. That's a truth that can't be denied but not what Dr. King would want talked about. At least I don't believe that is what he would want. I admit I haven't read a lot about him, studied his life and philosophy but the portions I have we are in agreement. I too believe in the content of your character as the defining factor. I also agree the first step is getting past your fears. You have to be willing to take a chance. 

 I like one thought in particular attributed to Martin Luther King, Jr. He said, " we may have all come on different ships, but we're in the same boat now. " That applies today as much as it did the day he uttered those words. He wasn't talking just about slave ships either! He was talking about all those that have come to America. Each wave of immigrants that came to our shores whether by force, or by desire, has been met with prejudice, opposition and been taken advantage of. And yes, the illegal ones have been, and continue to be, abused, used and generally dehumanized. I just don't include them in " my ship " just yet, not until they make legal passage. But that too is another discussion altogether. Martin Luther King did promote breaking the law, civil disobiendence, but doing so in a peaceful manner. I don't believe he would support the illegal entry in any country. But, like I say, that's another topic of discussion. 

 Can the hypothetical become the reality? That is the struggle of mankind isn't it? We all have these grand schemes and plans for the future of man. We all have the answers, at least in our own minds. Whether we have the courage to voice those ideas and opinions or not, we all harbor them. I certainly do. I certainly am not afraid to share those ideas either. Sometimes it is a good thing, sometimes not so much. At other times it may be downright foolish. Well, no matter. I still enjoy exploring the hypothetical and dreaming that it could one day be reality. And that is what MLK day is really about, in my opinion.   

           

it's a challenge

 You've heard of the Bird Box challenge and the Tide Pod challenge.  Well I've got a new challenge for these millennials. It's called the weather challenge! The object of the game is to go to work or school despite the weather. As I listened to the news this morning, a good portion was about the weather. All the warnings about the cold and the wind temperature. I even heard them extolling, don't go outside unless you have to. But I 'm proposing you go outside anyway! Yes, just go outside even when it is cold. I know it's a Holiday, MLK day, but don't use that for an excuse either. Get out there, like a pioneer. LOL You could wear a ribbon, a white one perhaps, and then tell people how you are a survivor. Maybe even get a trophy. I survived the cold of 2019.
 I'm waiting to see how the Democrats are going to blame Trump for this. Isn't it supposed to be global warming? Oh no, they changed that to climate change. Sounds much better and you can't dispute the weather changes. Well the weather is the climate, right? Well the weather determines the climate at a given place over time anyway. That's why we measure the ice at the North pole and complain the weather is changing in Florida.
 I don't know every time it happens I just shake my head. Today it is the weather. The news folks will drone on and on about the cold. It's the lead in to almost every story. I thought it was excessive when the evening news went from a half hour, to an hour, to two hours. The same story is repeated every ten minutes! Over and over again, drives me crazy. I heard it the first time. Now, I understand you may have come in a bit later and that's why it is being repeated, it's just that I think it is getting to be too much. And I also believe that is why the news has become what it is today. It is more entertainment than informative. The reason is basic economics, you have to pay for all that airtime. In order to do that you have to attract viewers. And that's why the news is entertainment today. Opinions making the headline and models reading the news and weather. We have a few guys around, the union says they have too, but attractive women are preferred. Why is that? The guys control the remote right? Yes, that's the thinking in the marketing department. What a bunch of sexists they must be. The guys tuning in to watch the weather girl? That's where it began didn't it? It has now spread to the anchors. The explanation is, there are more women in broadcasting today. Yes, I understand that. It's a liberating thing for the women of the world, equal opportunity. Really though a lot depends upon their physical appearance and anyone trying to deny that is just crazy. The more things change, the more they stay the same. The weather is no different.
 Well, like I said it's a challenge. It's cold outside! In six months it'll be hot outside. Could be snow or rain. Maybe the wind will blow. The weather, you just can't depend upon it to cooperate with your desires. Oh, it's a challenge alright!  A challenge no different than other real things! You know like, sometimes people won't agree with your opinion. Reality seems to be a challenge to a lot of these millennials. Things like, I have to have a job to get money! But its' cold outside, I should stay home and get paid. I should get my basics needs for free! I should only have to work to earn money to buy things I actually want. You know like two hundred dollar sneakers, Starbucks coffee and thousand dollar I-phones. Paying for medical insurance? What's up with that. Next thing you know they'll be telling me I have to make my own dream come true! Don't these old people realize that's the function of government? Dreamers gotta dream! We have no time for working.
 I got distracted a bit with all these challenges. Got off topic a bit I guess. It's just that I do tire of hearing the obvious stated over and over. It's 16 degrees outside, yup, that means it's cold. So glad I have a news anchor to keep me informed. And then I'm told if you go outside you could get, wait for it, cold. Frostbite is a possibility. Oh, and there could be ice out there, it's below freezing you know. The wind is blowing too, makes it feel colder, well who knew? Ah, modern information technology saves the day. Oh and don't forget to bring in your pets! Pets get cold too, again a revelation. Sure glad the news is on for two hours, it's a lot of information to take in. Why, it's a challenge.
     

A sign

 Yesterday I heard my fathers voice. I really did, although the last words I spoke with him where in 1990, just before his passing. Now I know I have, and I believe we all have, heard the voices of those we loved in our minds from time to time. They are gone, but not forgotten and a piece of them lives within us. But what I heard yesterday was a bit different. You see, I had ordered a new computer desk, I returned the last one but that's another story. Well the new desk arrived and was left by the Fed-Ex man at the base of my stairs. Two large cartons one weighing 84 lbs. and the other 124. Just large carboard cartons with no real way of holding onto them. I don't own a hand truck and there was no one else around. So, being the stubborn, impatient person that I can be I just started bringing those boxes up the staircase. It's seventeen steps. I had gotten about half way up when I stopped to rest a moment. My wife is concerned about me getting hurt and adding her comments and suggestions. It was then my father spoke, " just let me catch my wind. " The words came out of my mouth without thought. That is what he said, an expression I heard him say so many times growing up and an expression I hadn't heard since 1990. To add to that I only realized it shortly before falling asleep for the night. It was a sort of delayed message. Maybe there is some metaphysical explanation for all of that, but I don't place much stock in any of that stuff.
 I suppose you could say it was just a Freudian slip. I had heard my father use that expression many times and just repeated what I had heard. That explanation seems plausible enough but why I haven't done so in the last 29 years? I use his expressions a great deal as I always found them amusing and, shall we say, descriptive. But, let me catch my wind, isn't one of them. Dad had COPD and emphysema. He never said, let me catch my breath, it was always wind. I have heard others say I'm winded, or the horse was winded, expressions like that, but Dad was the only one I ever heard say, catch my wind. Perhaps it is nothing more than an outdated figure of speech. A relic of speech from the past. Perhaps it was a part of the local vernacular or dialect. Whatever or wherever that came from it lives inside me now. It's hard to explain this feeling I have. At first I wondered, what does this mean? I am officially that old now? I'm as old as my father? I have become my father? But Dad was 66 when he passed and I'm only 65. Was that voice an omen? Nah, I don't believe in omens much and premonitions I'm undecided upon. But I heard his voice, clear as a bell on a crisp winter morning. I'll take that as a gift.
 My sister went to join my father just a while back. She passed away on December the fourth of last year. Could it be that she has been chatting it up with him? Maybe it was she that caused me to utter that phrase. But, it was Dad speaking , no doubt about that. Maybe that was a sign from her. My sister always was a little timid, a bit shy. It wasn't her way to directly confront anyone. And so that makes me wonder, if that is so, what is the message she is trying to send. " Let me catch my wind " What is she trying to say? Is it to rest, take a deep breath and continue on? That would seem the obvious answer. It could be it means much more than that. The message could be far more important. Not just a simple message of encouragement, but advice as well.
 I was carrying a new desk at the time. My sister always encouraged my writing. She was one of my greatest supporters. She was that way when we were children playing games together. She always made me feel like I was important and smart. Yes, she was a terrific sister, supportive and understanding. Was this a way for her to tell to me concentrate more on that book I constantly talk about? Was she telling me, catch your wind, and begin? That's a possibility and she got Dad to tell me. Just like when we were kids in a way. Sometimes I thought she was mean when she told Dad stuff about me, but she really had my best interest at heart. I'll have to think more about all of this. Maybe I'm just looking for a sign and fabricating this whole scenario. But, those words did come out of my mouth clear as anything. They did give me a start! Ah, the world is a strange place isn't it? So much we don't know about. Well, today I will continue assembling my new desk. I'll give this some more thought later on.         

It happened to Talkhouse

 It's fascinating to talk with others about the old places. You know every town has them, those old haunts given a name in the local vernacular, but seldom recorded on any map. Those places may be large areas or a specific location. Over time the name stops being used for a variety of reasons. The boundaries become blurred and on occasion the location itself lost to time. I don't know of many here in Greensboro, being an outsider and all, I've only lived here twenty five or thirty years. I have heard of " four corners " that's where the stop light is today. It was the hub of downtown back in the day, or so I've been told. And I know if someone says they are going to the Tomb, they are going fishing. A Colonel Richardson is buried beside the river, in a tomb, and that's where you go to go catfishing. Since I've been here the area has been turned into a small park. I remember when it was just a path through the woods to reach the edge of the river. I'm certain there are many more such places that I've never heard of. A housing development was named HOKUM and that supposedly meant, the great bend in the river, in native American tongue. Well, I've noticed that housing developers always seem to find some name like that. I wonder if they don't create them at times. One I recall from my youth was Settlers Landing. I wasn't aware it was a development, I'm thinking that was a rather new concept back then, but remember seeing the sign. I knew people that lived there too. There was an inlet, of sorts, that was a good place to go eeling. When it froze over you could break through the ice and spear them. Ah, the good old days. Directly across the street was a little depression that held some water. That was a place to go ice skating. What I didn't know then, but have since learned, is that depression was a buffalo wallow. That's right, in the late 1800's a small herd of buffalo was kept there. A Mr. Gardiner was attempting to cross breed them with beef cattle. An early attempt at a Beefaloo. I hear that they have them now. I went to Indian rock once with a friend. He knew where it was located and it had water in a hollow on its' top. It was an interesting thing. The water must have been spring fed up through the rock because it was always there. We sprinkled a few drops of Clorox in that water, to purify it, and each drank some. The location of that rock has been lost to me. I wonder if it still exists at all.
 I like talking about these places in time. To me, it is a sort of time travel. It is definitely insider information. In todays world that isn't as true as it used to be. Given the internet, social media and the ease of writing a book it's no wonder. The problem is, that information may not be accurate at all. That happens when information is passed down, like in a game of post office. The original meaning, place, or intent, is lost. I think that is especially true when those places get " resurrected. " I've written about a section of my hometown called Freetown in the past. That name faded from use altogether for a number of years and only recently resurfaced. Other names have remained but the area they reference is questionable. Some areas have expanded while others shrank. Often it is those that do not have any roots in the town that resurrect those names. It is what we call today an appropriation. Cultural appropriation occurs when you wish to fit in, or otherwise sympathize with the locals. You either join them or feel sorry for them. Many times it is presented as an honor or a sign of respect. The truth is those folks just want to fit in. And at other times it is just a means to profit from a heritage you never had. You have heard of Stolen Valor, well that is stolen heritage.
 I don't have a problem with any of that. I think it is great to keep those old names alive. Isn't that what we wish for ourselves as well? I don't want my name forgotten. And I'll tell you I wouldn't mind if the stories, folklore and adventures of Ben were enhanced just a bit either! If someone in the future wants to claim that they knew me, that would be fine. My Great Grandfather claimed he knew a famous gentleman named Stephen Talkhouse. I believed him and he even had a walking stick he claimed had belonged to Talkhouse. Many years after my Great Grandfathers death I did some research. To my surprise Stephen Talkhouse passed away in 1879. Now Great Grandfather wasn't born until 1878 so it's unlikely he would have remembered him. Most likely he heard all his stories from a Miss Pokey. I can just vaguely remember her myself. I was ten when she passed. Miss Pokey, real name Pocahontas Pharahoh, was a friend to Great Grandfather. She worked at the phone company as a janitor. Stephen Talkhouse was a Pharahoh as well. I expect there was a relationship there family wise. But all that is history. Now if you google Stephen Talkhouse the first thing that Pops up is a nightclub! That night club existed when I was young and is still going strong. It is going strong because of its' location, in the Hamptons. Stephen Talkhouse is prominently displayed in a portrait on the wall. At least I believe that is the case from pictures I have seen. I haven't set foot in the Talkhouse in many moons! I was a Jungle Pete, Lions and Sams' kinda guy. The Talkhouse always was a bit trendy for my tastes. I would think Stephen Talkhouse would be pleased that his name is remembered. That it is associated with a night club I can't hazard a guess. I don't know his feelings about that. I don't think Miss Pokey would approve however.
 As the years pass I find there are fewer people I can mention those old names too. I'm talking about names I used as a kid. We had the big hill and the little hill. Go to the head of the harbor, and you knew exactly where to go. It's past Nortons' house. Names and places like that lost to time because the people are gone now. I'll take some names and places with me when it is my time to go as well. Given the amount of writing and recording I do, some may be rediscovered in the future. And then, it's a resurrection. Maybe I'll be appropriated! Wouldn't that be something? It happened to Stephen Talkhouse.         

A man

 So I watched that new ad from Gillette. You know the one that asks, is this the best a man can get? Yeah the ad is pandering to the #metoo movement. The intent, as far as I can tell, is to feminize boys. Yes, I have an issue with that mentality. Now I get it starts with the notion that boys will be boys and what that implies. But that implication comes from where? Other guys mostly, as an excuse for bad behavior. The guys all know it is bad behavior, no one has to show them an advertisement to realize that. But we are now in the age of the obvious! If we point out the obvious and act properly offended by that, that makes us " enlightened " and progressive. So just what is the purpose of this ad? It is really the same as all ads, to sell a product. The market is shifting to the millennials and so we must appeal to that demographic. And the millennial man is not being portrayed as the traditional alpha male, oh no, far from it. The millennial male is what? Gender fluid is the term they like to use for that. Instead of getting his moral and ethical lessons from his father, older brother, religious beliefs and peers, we will teach those behaviors with a razor! No more will boys be boys, they will be something else. Funny I've never heard that girls will be girls though. In my experience there are girls that are girls as well. Ah, but the boys are supposed to deal with that silently, never mentioning anything about those behaviors. In fact, if boys do, they will be accused of sexualizing women. They will be ridiculed and dismissed. But if a woman even whispers at a hint of wrongdoing she is to be believed without question. To even suggest otherwise gets you a label today, migyonist! A double standard? No, I've been told my whole life no such double standard exists. I was told that a man had to accept the consequences of his actions. In fact, that a man was accountable for his choices. And yes, the girls were too. Now the message is changing.
 Look this ad isn't really about boys being boys, it is about selling a product. By using the old deflect and misdirect tactic you can convince some folks to buy anything. If you don't believe that watch the evening news. The evening news is 99% opinion and 1% fact. There are many people in this country right now buying a real package of bull#hit. We have a portion of federal employees that are having to honor their employment agreement and this is being reported as unfair, bullying and hateful! Yes, that's the truth, or as a onetime honest newsman Walter Cronkite would have said, " that's the way it is. " He wouldn't offer his opinion on that situation, just reported the facts. Fact is, they signed the agreement and they must honor it. Gillette is using this #metoo movement as a marketing tool. Gillette is teaching moral and ethical values? I hardly think so.
 The ads begins with that question, " is this the best a man can get? " It's a nod to their advertising slogan of old. Gillette makes the best razors. During the commercial they show boys/men engaging in activities that we all know to be offensive toward the ladies. The cat calling, gawking, touching type behaviors that the " boys will be boys " engage in. Yes, there are those guys that feel a need to act like that. I'm no shrink and can't tell you why they feel that way. Yeah, insecurity is often cited, as well as wanting to attract attention, any attention, because they didn't get the love they wanted from their mommies. Whatever. The bottom line is some guys are just jerks. Remember however we are not supposed to mention the fact that there are girls/women that actively try to attract that attention. Maybe for the same reason as the guys? I don't know. But to suggest that they may have some culpability is taboo! I'd suggest you will catch just what you bait the trap for!
 So just how did we get to this point? You don't think it has anything to do with a lack of moral, ethical and religious instruction do you? It couldn't be that we, as a society, have degenerated to the point of dismissing those instructions as old fashioned? To think that the Mothers of our children should Mother them, and Fathers should care and provide for the family, is such an outdated notion. What of her desire to have a career or pursue other passions? What if Dad doesn't really want to work and raise his children? He might have other plans. Why the whole thing is just sexist! Maybe that's the real reason we are now trying to do away the whole concept of genders. No genders, no inherent responsibilty to do a thing. Without genders there is no gender role. And isn't that the whole issue here? We have decided that gender shouldn't play a role in the way we react to our environment. We are not hunter/gatherers anymore. We have decided that boys shouldn't be boys!
 Silly isn't it? We have always known that " boys shouldn't be boys " as far as the implied concept. We have always known what was acceptable behavior in a society and what was not. There have been many momentous struggles over the years to effect changes as far as what is allowed. Mostly those struggles involved your race, class, social status, income level, education or some other factors. But now, we want to change human nature. And yes, it is natural for a male to be attracted to a female. We were designed that way for a reason. The method the male, or female, choices to attract the other may certainly vary and vary greatly, but it is human nature and natural attraction. My point being what should be taught needs to be taught at home.
 I really don't have a big problem with that ad. It's 2019 and sensibilities are changing as they always do. I'm thinking what does bother me is I'm not hearing anything being directed at the girls. We have gigantic industries that do nothing but sell products to make the female more attractive, more appealing, more desirable. Everything from clothing, make-up, surgeries and campaigns stressing the fact that all girls are desirable creatures, but really the scantily clad ones with excessive makeup are the most desirable of all. How many beauty magazines are there? How many products are marketed with the promise, it will attract a man? I find it troubling that no longer are young girls being told to maintain their reputation. No longer is that the primary message. Now it's use birth control and if you don't want to use that, just abort the child, hey, no judgement right? Marriage, raising a child, maintaining a home? Those values just aren't being taught much these days are they? No, and if you suggest they should, you are, you guessed it, a migyonist!
 Well that's my rant for the day. It isn't supposed to mean anything in particular. It is just my thoughts. The thoughts of an old man that was taught to be a man. I was taught that being a man didn't mean conquering women! I was taught that a man really has only one thing, his word. I was taught a man had to live by a code. You don't go changing the code when you find it inconvenient. That's not how it works. Yup, boys will be boys! The object is, become a man.    

Oh, the irony

 Breaking news this morning. Nancy Pelosi and her fellow Democrats are concerned about the state of the union address. The date has not been set due to the government shutdown. Nancy is worried because it takes hundreds, even thousands of people to organize and plan this event. And a great number of these people have been furloughed. She didn't mention they were furloughed because they are non-essential personnel. Hmm, maybe the state of the union address is a non-essential function as well? Gee, what a thought. Imagine if the President just sat there in the oval office and gave his speech, sorta like those Fireside chats Roosevelt was so famous for? How much money would be saved? Security should be easy peasy as well. Of course it would circumvent any plans the Democrats have of disrupting the speech. No cameras panning across their faces as Trump speaks.
 I couldn't help but wonder why Nancy Pelosi is so upset. I was under the impression she didn't want to listen or talk to Trump. Now she seems concerned that there might not be a huge gala event. Millions of dollars may not get spent on that after all. So, just how are they going to complain about the funds being spent on a state of the union address if we don't have one? Man, that's going to be a problem. The only solution is to present this to the public as though it were a matter of national security! No, wait a minute can't talk about national security when we are unwilling to fund that. Maybe if Trump gives his state of the union address from the oval office we can say, he built a wall between us! LOl. The real issue here is we don't have all these non-essential personal getting a paycheck for planning a non-essential function. Anything less would mean a reduction in the number of government employees. What the heck! Is Trump trying to make government smaller? What's next? Is Trump just going to send out a Tweet instead?
 Well I found the whole thing amusing. Nancy Pelosi and her cronies complaining because Trump may not be giving a speech. Oh, the irony. What chance for rebuttal is there if he doesn't give a speech? This doesn't look good. Relax Nancy I'm certain you have a television in that mansion of yours. You can have a watch party, invite all those refugees over, and do a little campaigning at the same time. Maybe Chuck will come too. Hey Trump bought fast food for that basketball team the least you could do would be the same. Well, might want to order from Taco Belle but you get the idea. Bon Appetit Nancy.  

A Mexican standoff

 Don't they call it buyers regret? Isn't that when you agree to something, a purchase with or without terms, and later realize you don't like it? Then you just want to take it back? Yes, I'm certain that is what that is called. What is it called when you accept an offer of employment, agree to the terms of that employment, but want to change those terms when the employer enforces those terms? I call it a breach of contract. Apparently all these essential government workers have a different opinion on that. I'm hearing that they are complaining, asking for additional help, and generally feel like they are being mistreated. Man, don't you just hate it when someone holds you to your word, or contract?
 Now I understand completely how much of a burden it is. If I weren't getting paid I'd be pretty upset too. The thing is, they signed the agreement. When you sign the agreement you accept the benefits and possible liabilities that come with that position. I worked for the town for a number of years. I didn't get to only work on bright sunny days or between certain hours. No, I was required to work regardless of the weather, regardless of the hour and regardless of holidays should the need arise. Where they times I didn't like it? You bet! I spent twenty years in the Navy. That job was twenty four seven, I signed the papers and agreed to that. I even agreed to get shot at if that was necessary. I just figured the benefits would outweigh the liabilities in the long run. I was fortunate indeed that it worked out according to plan. Many of my fellow veterans weren't so lucky. But the point is, we all signed the agreement.
 The thing that bothers me the most is a lack of reporting on this aspect of the situation. All I hear from the main stream news outlets are, 800,000 federal workers are working without pay! That statement is a fallacy. Essential workers, approximately 100,00 or so are working without receiving a paycheck. 700,000 or so non-essential workers are being furloughed. That means they don't have to show up for work. They may use their accrued vacation or apply for unemployment benefits. All the essential workers will eventually receive a check for their work! In fact, some TSA employees are receiving a 500 dollar bonus. The bonus is why? Because they choose to honor their contracts. Hmm, too bad I don't get a bonus for doing what I agreed to do. Guess it is a special accomplishment. But why aren't the main stream media outlets reporting on the fact that these essential government workers signed an agreement to do just that? Why are they painting a picture like it is someone's fault? Hey, they agreed to it! What part of that don't the news folk understand?
 I just see all of this as another bit of liberal nonsense. It goes along with changing the name of things to make it sound better or moral or something like that. Illegal aliens crossing our borders are now, refugees. Yeah, I remember when they were illegal aliens, undocumented immigrants and migrants. But no more, now they are refugees. Remember when there were just two genders? In some of these liberal leaning states there are now gender neutral folks. Can't tell what that new born is until they are old enough to tell you themselves! Just how stupid is that? And don't get me started on renaming perversions as, alternate life styles. Please. an aberration is just that, an aberration. Whether or not you choose it that's what it is. And now the media would have you believe that signing an agreement is only valid when that agreement works in your favor. Should it become a burden or inconvenient you don't really need to honor it. But if you do, you're a hero and should be rewarded! I expect we will see that agenda being pushed real soon. Oh the poor suffering workers.
 Of course the politicians are still getting paid. Can't expect them to work without pay can you? How else could they afford to go to Puerto Rico to watch a play? Hey last year they worked almost six months! That's more than the law says they have to, they should be commended. But they aren't going to agree to a budget because of what? To put it simply it's because the Democrats feel like they don't want to lose. The Republicans feel like they have to stand their ground. It's a " Mexican " standoff! No pun intended but that's exactly what we have here. And it is only over a mere 5.7 billion dollars. Shoot the same Congress that is balking at that funding gave away four or five times that amount in foreign aid. They did that without blinking an eye and you never heard a thing about it. It isn't about money, it's about power and pride.
 The news will keep reporting about the workers. The reason is simple enough. It will keep the population agitated. The government isn't at fault here, it's the agreement the workers signed. Imagine the nerve of an employer that holds you to your word! C'mon people, why it's like slavery! Yes, I've heard that analogy being bantered about. Those workers are being forced to work against their will and without getting paid! Just like slaves did. Outrageous. Never mind the fact that they are free to quit anytime they want. What message is being sent to the children? You don't have to honor your agreements if you don't want too. Not if you don't like it. Not if, wait for it, reality strikes! Yes, it's a reality, you signed an agreement and must honor it. Man, life is tough isn't it?         

financed

 Where once we worked and prayed, now we finance. I can't help but question which way is better. I'm thinking the old way was a better life. But that life was regulated and taxed by those that didn't want to work or pray. How did we allow that to happen? Just how did we allow ourselves to be regulated into debt, financially and morally? It is a question I sometimes lie awake at night contemplating.
 In the beginning we worked for the things we needed, the basic necessities of life. Food, clothing, shelter and yes, community. Man has always been a communal creature, requiring the company of others. In the animal kingdom we call that the pack, or a den, or a flock, but the meaning is the same. Birds of a feather flock together. Man has been no different. Man has also protected the things he believed to be his. That is central to understanding how we got on this path to dependence. We realize there is strength in numbers. Someone has to lead the pack however, someone has to make the choices. The leaders began to make demands upon the people. For my protection! It was the protection we used to pray for, now being supplied, for a price. At first it was simply physical force. The enemy would be overwhelmed by force of numbers. The spoils equally divided among the victors, well except for the leaders that is, they always received a larger share. Soon it became evident, legislation would be required to control the population, to restrain the pack. That legislation began with the Gods! The Gods controlled the universe did they not? Good weather, bad weather, good fortune or catastrophe hinged upon the whim of the Gods. The people had to appease them first, through sacrifice and offerings. Leaders began to show themselves as Gods, controlling the fortunes of men. That was the beginning.
 As communities grew, as cultures progressed, more things were required to satisfy man. No longer content with working for the basic necessities of life, man wanted more. Praying wasn't getting the job done, at least not fast enough, another method was needed. Money was the answer. The abstract idea of trading one item for another, by proxy. I no longer had to have an actual product to barter with, I could just give you something that represents whatever product you want. You can then use that abstract idea to " purchase " whatever it is you want. Somehow, for reasons I can't explain, Gold and other precious medals and stones became those proxies. I want an essential item, you have it. I give you a non-essential item, say a chunk of gold and the deal is made. But what value does that gold actually hold? Whatever value man attaches to it is the answer. Then man began fighting man for those substances. When I gained an excess of gold or precious stones I used them to buy the stuff of luxury. I no longer needed to work or pray! I could simply barter.
 And now I'm thinking we have reached the point were we just finance our dreams. We work to gain the means to finance. We no longer work for ourselves, for the necessities of life, we work to gain the things we can't afford. We have been convinced that is what we should do. Who did the convincing? The ones that don't work is the short answer. The ones that hold the money and the power. It is those " leaders " that have legislated us all into dependence. No longer can we just work and pray, now we must Pay! If you want it, you have to buy it in one fashion or another. Whether it is as simple as a fee to be paid, a permit to be issued, or one of a thousand taxes to be paid, you will pay. And just who are you paying? The ones with the money.
 In the beginning we worked and prayed. We prayed for favor from the Gods, that we may be spared. At some point man decided to pay the Gods for their favor, believing that may work. That we could somehow purchase eternal life. We called it sacrifice, offerings, and a host of other names. I submit that the Gods didn't care at all. After all, if they are Gods can't they just get whatever they want without my help? In most cases, just who benefitted from those offerings? Was it the Gods? Unlikely in my thinking. What is it that God wants? Obedience would be my answer. You can't finance Obedience, you have to live it.  

a watchful eye

 Remember October 2018? Do you recall what the big issue was then? It was one dividing the nation and the topic of arguments on social media. It was going to be a catastrophe of grave consequence. It may even lead to the destruction of the Republic as we know it! After much debate, hearing , investigations and angst, Brett Kavanaugh was made a supreme court justice. Well, here it is January of 2019 and Roe v Wade hasn't been repealed, women still have the same rights as they did before his appointment, and the Republic remains intact. Of course, Brett may be responsible for the shutdown, but it is more expedient to just blame Trump for that. Besides the Democrats have forgotten all about Brett, having lost their bid to stop that appointment. Truth is they never really cared about Brett Kavanaugh, they just wanted to win something, anything because they are still suffering from their loss in the election two years ago. Did you hear that Brett Kavanaugh issued his first opinion as a supreme court Justice? Of course you didn't, the main stream media couldn't care less about Kavanaugh anymore. Besides it was a unanimous decision by the court, so that's cool. Just wait until Brett goes contrary to what the liberals want, then you will hear about it! In the meantime, have a cold one, Brett surely is, and just relax.
 At the moment the big topic of discussion is the government shutdown. 800,000 workers are not getting paid. Well, that' not exactly factual but makes for great headlines. The Democrats are blaming the Republicans. Gee, that's news isn't it? The Republicans' are blaming the Democrats, that's a big surprise. In the meantime Congress went home for the weekend, hey they are getting paid regardless. Maybe they'll take a vote on changing that policy. LOL, Yeah that'll happen. In 2016, the last year I could get figures for, the house of Representatives was in session 131 days and the Senate for 165 days. Guess they are being overworked! If you read their explanation that's what they say. Like every other boss in America they count talking about stuff, having luncheons, going to dinner and attending parties as " working. " It's exhausting. And then they will tell you they have to go home to listen to their constituents. Strangely I have never met a single one of them in person. Representatives and Senators don't hang out at the local tavern to discuss issues you know. But they will appear at rally's occasionally, sleeves rolled up, begging for your vote and your money. They are pretty good about showing up for " work " then. Yeah, they count that as working. Well with a base salary of only 172,000 what can you expect? Our newest Senator says she can't even afford to live in D.C. she needs more money! Yes, it's a hardship alright.
 Eventually the budget will get passed. Then it will be another big issue of some kind. The 2020 election is getting closer every day and I'm certain many folks are getting nervous. Can the Dems stand another loss? That is a big question regardless of which side of the fence you are standing on. I'm not convinced Trump will run again, he might, but I'll wait and see. Just who the Democrats will run is another big mystery. I'm thinking whoever it is will be a female, possibly belonging to some ethnic group that is politically expedient to todays agenda, or at a minimum a minority. It'll have to be a verifiable minority though, one proven with DNA testing and everything. Have to avoid the Native heritage debacle. Setting all of that aside though, I am concerned should the Republicans prevail, no matter the candidate. The concern is not for the nation however, the concern is that those Dems will come further unglued than they already are. That's a real concern.
 We will all get through this somehow. Legislation will be written and passed. Business will get back to normal. Isn't that the real issue today? Business hasn't been normal since the United States hired a new CEO. Fiscal responsibilty and what's best for the company has been pushed to the forefront. A portion of the company's workforce are close to rebellion! What do you mean, I have to pay for stuff? I should just receive my paycheck and get to spend it solely on stuff I want. Pay for services I need? That's just crazy, I should use my money for new smartphones, cars and vacations. And I should get more money! The company has lots of money to give away, give it to me. I don't have a clue where the company gets that money, but they have it! If I need medical care, let the company pay for that. If I want to send my kids to college, let the company pay for that. If I feel stressed out, I should be able to stay home, get paid extra for that, and the company foot the bill. I need safe spaces and an emotional support animal, the company should pay for that also. Hey, we lost the election, remember!
 Well all I can say is, grab a beer and enjoy the show. It is going to get interesting real soon. Something is going to happen I guarantee it. It always does. I'm not worried, just anxious. Let's get the legislation signed, some agreement reached. I'm hoping that happens soon, there is other important business to take care of. Half the employees want to fire the boss, and the other half agree with him. Some of the other " companies " in the world are getting nervous as well. Hey, this could affect business, their bottom line as well. What if this new boss decides to not give all the handouts the old ones did? Then what? Are you saying you want free and equal trade agreements? What's up with that? Just who is going to take care of our citizens? I mean, those migrants, er immigrants, er folks leaving our nation because our nations stink? You expect us to deal with that? No, no, you should take them all in, it's the only humanitarian thing to do. We don't have to act in that fashion towards our citizens, but you do! That's how it always worked in the past. Yeah, things are starting to get interesting alright. I'm keeping a watchful eye on this situation.           

bound to happen

 Mid January 2019 and I woke up to the proverbial winter wonderland. Looking out the window all I see is white. It isn't that deep but is supposed to continue throughout the day. An accumulation of eight inches is possible. I don't mind, I only have to drive a few blocks to my sons' house to feed the dog. My son and family are on a cruise ship at the moment, somewhere in the Caribbean. If the news is to be believed when they return next weekend it will be snowing once again. Welcome Home.
 I do enjoy looking at the snow before it gets all dirty from man. Humans tend to mess up the environment you know. We are causing climate change I'm being told. Well maybe we could change it back. But what would that be? Just when did man start changing the climate? Wouldn't that be the reset point? I just watched a show on the Mayans last evening. The scientists say their empire collapsed over a thousand years ago. The reason? Climate change. The belief is there was a severe drought. The water supply became insufficient to sustain the population living in the jungles of the Yucatan peninsula. Of course those scientists didn't offer an explanation for that change, the Mayans thought the Gods were mad at them. Maybe they were, for building all those temples and cities in the jungle disturbing the environment like that. Yeah, that was probably it alright. The Gods did it. Or maybe it was just nature taking its' nature course, you know, changing all on its' own. A drought, imagine that happening. Well, there is overwhelming evidence that the earth had a major flooding situation once too. Could it be nature seeking a balance? I wonder. But whatever the case may have been I'm not concerned with this snowstorm happening in Greensboro. I believe I'll be just fine.
 The weather people are having a blast. They will be on air for hours repeating the same forecast. They get to talk about driving in the snow, warning you to stay home. They will report on accidents and traffic slowdowns. They get to be hyped up all day! In some places it's a state of emergency! Could be a foot of snow in some areas. This is so inconvenient, why hasn't the government done anything about this? We will be told to make sure you have emergency supplies in your car. You will need, at a minimum, blankets, food, water, first aid kit, ice scraper, shovel, signal flags, ice melt and a flashlight with batteries. That is the bare minimum if you plan on driving to the store for more supplies. Make sure you check on the elderly neighbors too. There is a lot to do, to be prepared. You really should have started in July, you knew this would happen eventually! It's climate change for Gods sake!
 As I mentioned I will have to go out later today to care for the dog. I don't mind at all. I can walk there if I really want too. I may get ambitious and take a stroll to the cemetery. I do like to take pictures in the cemetery with the snow cover. Even when taken in color, the pictures will appear black and white. It is something I have noticed, and find it somehow prophetic. Death is certainly a black and white thing. At least to me it is, I can't picture it any other way. I don't believe in ghosts and spirits inhabiting the earth. No, to me you are either dead or alive, plain and simple. Those folks in the cemetery, they are all dead. They all died and that's why they are there. There souls however are not. They have gone onto the next plane of existence. But I'm wandering off a bit. I just find a cemetery covered in snow to be a place of serenity. I do like things black and white, I like that settled feeling. It's a comfort.
 So today, and for the next few days, I will have to deal with this change in the climate. I did have some plans that will have to be changed. Nothing that can't wait though. I'm grateful I no longer have to go to work in this weather. When I worked for the town it was a hassle. Plowing, shoveling and listening to complaints. I used to hear that all day. I enjoy the silence now, except when I want to read it on Facebook. There is always something there to complain about. Looking out the window across the expanse of white is a beautiful thing. The sun has yet to rise upon this day. If I were intrepid enough I would try to capture the sunrise, but I'm not. I'm betting it would make a great picture though, especially taken across a barren corn field with the farmers house in the distance. Well, maybe one day, not today. The first snow of the year, it was bound to happen.  
       

your own good

 I think I've reached that point in life. You know, where you start to realize the things that are important. I've got a long ways to go and hopefully I will be given that time. Time is the greatest gift of all, after all. With the loss of my sister I was once again reminded of that. Then, just the other day a good friend of mine lost her daughter, another life cut short in time. My grandson will be 18 in ten days, time moving on. Well, time and tide wait for no man, an old adage I heard my grandmother use many times. Grandma was an advocate for " get'er done " long before Larry the cable guy, long before cable in fact! But they were concerned mostly with accomplishing a goal of some type. With life, do we really want to get'er done? I'm not looking forward to it being over myself, but realize it will be, one day. So, for that reason, I have begun to concentrate more on the important stuff in life.
 What is the important stuff? Is it money or material things? It is, for the short term. That's why we buy so much insurance. Insurance is a stop gap measure to ease our burden, or the burden of those left behind. Living goes on, even when our life ends. The important things benefit others more than ourselves. That is the lesson to be learned in all of this. It is also why I say, I have just begun. It isn't an easy transition. I enjoy the creature comforts as much as anyone else, the short term gain. It is harder to concentrate on the long term, especially a term longer than myself. The reason for it is a simple one, there is little short term gain for me. In fact, there are times when working toward the long term you are criticized for your failure to satisfy in the moment.
 " It's for your own good. " How many times did you hear that as a child? Then we spend a great deal of our time and effort getting stuff for ourselves. We are concerned with our own good. Or so it would seem. Some of us never understand any of that. Some get fixated on the money and material things, equating them to success. Popularity is of paramount importance to others. Still others get fixated on doing good for the benefit of others, whether the others like it or not. It's for their own good after all. I'm justified in doing so aren't I? I'm doing it for me, but it's really for you.  It was " for my own good " after all.
 Could it be that I am starting to understand what is " for my own good? " I mean that in a much larger sense than previously thought. Is this an admission of wrongdoing? No, I wouldn't say that, I would say it is a fresh perspective however. A view I haven't taken before. A revelation? No, not nearly that magnitude, but a glimpse perhaps. Feels more like a surrender than anything else. Well if I am going to surrender, I should, at the very least, leave behind something useful to those that come after me. Life goes on and the battle rages. It's true, sometimes something is " for your own good. " 

under control

I'm listening to the news and I hear this phrase being used over and over. We need to get crime under control! The news I'm listening to is mostly concerned with the City of Baltimore. Last year there was in excess of 300 homicides in the city. It is a tragic tale of death and destruction. A few cases have involved small children, babies really, shot as a by product of gang warfare and drug deals gone wrong. Distraught parents are featured in these news segments, tears streaming down their faces in anguish. These folks are appealing to the thugs to stop the shooting. The Mayor and other leaders are saying we need to get the crime under control. The City of Baltimore is searching for a new Police Commissioner. The city has had several over the last few years. The latest candidate saying he will get crime under control. What I hear all these folks saying is, we can't stop the crime, but we can limit it. So the message is, we will tolerate just so much crime before we do something about it. We will get it under control. My question is, what's that mean? How many homicides are acceptable? When do you consider crime under control? Just how much crime is the right amount, the expected amount?
 I get it, I understand the frustration of law enforcement. Yes, there are bad people that will do bad things. Crime will happen and there really is little you can do to prevent that. Crime is committed by those that choose to take that path. Crime is the result of individual choice. The reasons are as varied as the crime. You can say it is the result of poverty, lack of opportunity, education, race, ethnicity and a host of other influences. The bottom line is, it's an individual choice. In my way of thinking when you glorify this " lifestyle choice " going as far as creating a whole genre of music dedicated to those choices, you shouldn't be surprised. If you teach the children, they will believe.
 The majority of us believed in Santa Claus at one point in our lives. Why? Because the adults told us so and there was a promise of reward for believing. You have to believe in Santa to get presents from Santa don't you? And if you are told by your parents and other adults since birth that you are handicapped in some fashion you will grow up believing that. The validity of the claim isn't that important, only the repeating of that claim. I was told that we couldn't " afford " many things when I was a kid. What my parents were really saying was, we ain't spending our money on that. Still I believed that we couldn't afford whatever it was I wanted. Now that didn't give me license to steal  what I wanted. That wasn't a choice. I was taught that was the quickest way to jail and hell that there was, committing a crime! There wasn't an acceptable excuse for that choice. It didn't matter one bit how much the neighbor had, or how they got it. There was no discussion about what was fair. There was no presumption that I was entitled to anything. You got what you earned. Did I make bad choices? Sure did, and I paid for every one of them. I didn't like it very much but that's life, is what I was told.
 What has all that got to do with getting crime under control? I believe that is where that control has to begin. It must begin at home. That is the frustration of law enforcement. Law enforcement is concerned with punishment. Law enforcement is not about teaching values, it is about apprehending and punishing those that offend. The offender is aware that they have committed a crime. It was their choice to risk being caught at it, just like a kid stealing a piece of candy when Mom ain't looking. It is a matter of risk and reward. I get it, being a moral person isn't much of a reward is it? Morality doesn't pay the rent or feed your family. There is truth in that and it can't be denied. Still there have been plenty of moral people that were poor. So just what is the answer? We have to teach the children that the only thing between them and success is hard work, dedication and ethical conduct. Parents have to do the work before the Police are forced to intervene.
 I watch the news and see what is happening in the cities. I watch the news and see the spread of that to the suburbs. I see the acceptance of crime as a matter of course. Excuses are made, no one is blamed, it just happens that way. And now the Police are supposed to do what? How are they supposed to get crime under control? It's not going to happen with a task force, it's not going to happen with swat teams, it's not going to happen by any administrative means. Crime will get under control when people are taught to control themselves. That is the bottom line. I sure wish I had an answer to even a small piece of this mess. I have none, just observations.     

Where heroes live

  As we hold fundraisers, parades, and events constantly extolling the sacrifice of our heroes, I  can't help but notice the lack of the same. I mean, where are the heroes. They have become " everyday " things. But are there any real heroes left? If so, I'm just not seeing any. I'm talking people like Audie Murphy. Do any of these kids today even know who he was? I doubt it, but if you were looking for a hero, he'd be the man. What about Alvin York? Jonas Salk was a hero. You can name celebrities and entertainers as heroes too, but they are not in the same category as the others, in my opinion. Ira Hayes, a hero with a sad ending. So, what happened to our heroes? Well I'd say the media made them all too familiar to us all. How they did that was by exposing their humanity. You could argue that is a good thing and the only proper thing to do. I can't offer any argument to refute that thinking but I can offer some thoughts. The old saying familiarity breeds contempt comes to mind. I'm thinking this isn't exactly the same thing but has the same effect. Heroes, out of necessity, must be placed above ourselves on a moral and virtuous level. That's what makes them heroes! They are not like you and I. I see no heroes today because that quality has been stripped bare and they are exposed as being, human.
 When I was growing up we had real heroes. Yes, they were real people, and they had real faults as well as virtues. Thing is, the faults weren't as readily exposed to the general public. Hero's are created in the public eye. Consider JFK. Everyone knows immediately who you are talking about if you say those initials. I'd say you are famous when just your initials is enough. Much has been said and written about his Presidency and the idea of Camelot. During his lifetime you certainly didn't hear about his extramarital affairs, his grandfathers dealings with the criminal element, or any goings on of a questionable moral nature with his family. No, he was the fresh young President of the United States, the first Catholic President ever elected. His wife was a woman of style and class. After being assassinated he become a hero! I'd say that legacy has been completely destroyed by the media in the years that have followed. I say that and I'm not one that was ever a big fan of him or his administration. Before him there was FDR, another man known solely by his initials. FDR the hero of the working man and a cripple. You didn't hear much about that though and many common people were completely unaware. Great effort and pains were taken to conceal that from the general public. Why? Because heroes aren't crippled, that's why. So was it a deceit being perpetrated on the American people or a vehicle of hope? You decide.
 In 2019 ask the young people who their heroes are. What you will hear is a list of entertainers and sports figures. That was true when I was a kid as well. I had heroes like John Wayne to look up to. I realize now he was only playing a part but what a part it was. If John Wayne didn't instill patriotism and pride in you there was something wrong! Didn't matter if he was being a cowboy or a green beret, he stood for America. He was a character of values. He certainly wasn't supposed to be some imaginary super villain or caped crusader. I also admired Joe DiMaggio, joltin' Joe a man of impeccable character, didn't he still love Marilyn and send her flowers. And there was Mickey Mantle, a giant of a man. The sports writers didn't report on his indiscretions, they reported on his on field talents.
 Do you know why entertainers and sports figures are the usual heroes? Because we can all dream to be like them, to ball play, sing, dance, or act. That never changes. We also forgive them for their human frailties because it benefits us to do so. We get to enjoy their performances, it's as simple as that. In recent years we have started holding some of those sports figures to a higher standard and I think that is a good thing. Even athletes that are worth a lot of money to the team are being effected! That's saying something when we are willing to sacrifice money or profits for a moral issue. It is an aberration these days, but my hope is one day it will be an everyday thing.
 I do believe we have these entertainers and sports figures because we all inherently search for heroes. It is something everyone needs. For the Christian isn't Jesus the ultimate hero? A figure to admire and to emulate. A man beyond reproach. In years past we had real life heroes. Yes, they were fabricated and protected to a degree. We, the general public, were shielded from their failures. Like children with parents, not everything was told. Some things would be explained later on, some things we just learned on our own. But today with social media, the main stream news, and literally hundreds of other sources are there any secrets anymore? No, I'd say everything and anything is reported. The real challenge today is determining what the truth is. But hasn't that always been the challenge? Well, the truth is what you believe it to be, that's the bottom line. And how do you decide what is true? By gathering as much information as you can and weighing that information against your own moral and religious beliefs. Were we uninformed in the past? The question is, did you need to know? Personally I believe there are some things that are just none of your business. And it is in that statement hero's live. Other than Jesus Christ there has been no one that was perfect. That being understood we can then realize the reality of heroes. They are only what we believe them to be. That is based solely on what they demonstrate to us. My problem today is what virtues are the heroes demonstrating? The virtues I learned, the ones I believe I should practice, are being questioned as " old fashioned " and " outdated. " Truth has changed! It has been so with each generation I suppose but I take heart in knowing that history repeats itself. One day perhaps we will see the return of the heroes. One can only pray.