I often feel like these blogs of mine are nothing more than talking to myself. That's not a bad thing, I seldom get into an argument and have learned a few things over the years. I have found that I will talk about the same stuff and I'm pleased to see I haven't really changed all that much over those years. I still pretty much feel the same way about most things. There really is little new in the world, something I heard my parents say and only now do I really understand what they meant. People and their emotions and notions haven't changed, still self centered for the most part. I include myself in that assessment. Today they call that "mental health" and you are urged to get help with that, mostly through pharmaceuticals. A few pills and a therapist, you'll be good to go.
According to the statistics I have posted 5,257 blogs over the last twelve years. I have received 646 comments. So, as you can see if you counted one comment per blog that would mean about 12% of the time. It's actually less as some blogs have multiple comments, the vast majority having none at all. But all that depends upon how you want to report it. Still these generally early morning discussions I have with myself have become somewhat more a force of habit than motivated by anything else happening in the world. There are many mornings when I contemplate not continuing at all. But I remind myself of my original intent in posting them, to leave a record of me.
I don't believe there is enough material for me to write an autobiography that would be of much interest to those that aren't related to me, or a close friend. Beyond that little circle my life has just been the same everyday story as most everyone else. It isn't a drama or any great story of success, of survival or empowerment. No it has just been me doing whatever I thought best at the time. I didn't always do what was best. I just moved on from that, sometimes learning from it, sometimes repeating that mistake multiple times. But, I'll be leaving my thoughts behind, and that is what I was thinking about. It matters to me.
I now view this as the modern day version of a journal or diary. Many people have kept those over the years, I know my sister did. She didn't share her journal with anyone however. She told me as she filled her journal, she would simply discard it afterwards. I think the earliest version of that would have to have been the family bibles. People used to record births and deaths in those bibles, marriages and other life changing events. For genealogists they are a treasure trove of information and taken as the final authority! If something is recorded in the family bible it will stand up in a court of law! My blog postings will not carry that weight. It's my feeling that they should however, as I am the authority on my opinions and views. It's what I said.
The biggest difference in blogging and keeping a diary is in the information shared. I do not share my personal thoughts and views. Diaries are far more intimate. I have no desire to engage in that practice, I don't want to record my shortcomings and failures, something required of a diary. No my hope is to leave behind something that may prove useful to others. At the very least I hope to entertain, if only for a few moments at a time. I now have a great granddaughter. I hope one day she may read some of my postings.
I knew my own great grandfather and wish I had asked him a lot more questions than I did. I would love to read his opinions on things never discussed with him. Not personal things, that isn't what I mean, I just mean things in general. The things that were new to him, like a telephone or a television set. What did he think about cars? Just the everyday life sort of stuff. He was born in 1878 and had certainly seen a lot by the 1960's when I knew him.
I was born in the mid twentieth century, the 1900's and my great granddaughter will most likely experience much the same with me. Then perhaps when she reaches her forties she will wonder about the stuff that happened in the late twentieth century, stuff like the Vietnam war, 9/11 and social issues. Today we think back and read about those things we didn't experience, things like slavery, and wonder what did those living at that time really think. What were their views? I wonder if these blogs of mine will still be on some server somewhere, accessible to the everyday person. We tend to believe things will last forever but that certainly isn't the truth. Or will this all be lost, like the great library of Alexandria, destroyed by some catastrophe. Will we be some "advanced" civilization lost to time.
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